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se journey sugar tagged ayurveda coffee detox environmental toxins no sugar raw diet reflection rest secondhand smoke smoking jul 27 doing too much posted by livingisaprocess 1 the summer between my sophomore and junior years of college i dedicated my summer to working in west oakland ca in a neighborhood called lower bottom birthplace of the black panthers it was there that i had one of the first profound prophecies over my life not from a shaman yogi guru pastor or priest no these words were simple and to the point and came from the mouths of the middle school girls i was charged with mentoring i can t even remember who was the first to say it but i m confident i heard it multiple times from multiple girls they would look at me after i said and or did something raise one eyebrow which was always a sure sign they disapproved cock their head smoosh up their little mouths and say christie you re doing too much of course it would take me the greater part of a decade to understand what they were trying to say initially i was defensive and denied their claims i wasn t doing too much i just cared liked to help wanted to be active yada yada yada but as the years have worn on and my body has worn out i ve come to understand the wisdom in such simple words hello i m christie and i do too much this past week i decided to embark on a detox this is nothing new to my life multiple experts in the natural health and healing circuit recommend a regular detox detoxes relieve the digestive system of the burden of digesting food and can better focus on removing the build up of harmful toxins from the system there are many detoxes out there but i chose a hybrid of raw ayurvedic practices my detox started with only consuming light raw fruits and vegetables on tuesday to ease my body in moved into a soup sauteed greens option from ayurveda on wed fri and will finish tomorrow with more raw foods to ease my body out along with the nutritional detox most experts stress a mental emotional detox as well mine must have been ready for it because i woke from a bad dream tuesday night crying into the dark tears of release i wanted to let the days of the detox be more intentional focused on reading the signs of my body honoring the need to rest and nap wednesday had other plans i knew i would need to work at the studio for about 5 hours then head to a friend s to clean for 2 then i planned to go see a movie by myself except a project was overdue and sent me running around town to the printer then miscommunication between staff meant covering the evening shift at the studio then the pos software was giving me fits and warranted 2 calls to the help line i got home at 9 15p and collapsed into bed i do too much this reality has been a hard one to accept i moved from denial to anger why can t i do whatever i want to bargaining ok if i just nap here and here i can still do all this stuff to depression and acceptance which i find myself toeing the line as i wrestle with feeling sad at the thought of missing out and then relieved when i just allow myself to rest no matter the stage though the truth was undeniable i began to notice a pattern of really exerting myself accepting every offer to hang out do coffee grab a drink attending every event i thought would be interesting or was invited to etc then crashing it was as if i went back to the well and found it completely dry but my body mind spirit completely parched and i panicked i retreated sometimes involuntarily one such event happened several years ago a friend who lived in chicago agreed to let me borrow her apartment when she was out of town i packed my backpack hopped on the megabus and several city buses later arrived in her place a wave of exhaustion rushed over me and i laid down for a nap that turned into bedtime that rolled into the next day and afternoon and night i ventured out only once for dinner i felt sick but something told me i just needed the rest all my grandiose plans to explore the city and journal and have adventures went out the window my reserves were depleted and finally being away from the voices and temptations in my own city i could hear my body mind spirit crying out for a break this detox period has heightened those senses today after working running errands all morning i considered squeezing in a movie with indy film fest they ll be gone tomorrow and i haven t watched nearly enough i argued with myself before heading back to the studio to work all evening i kept going back and forth should i shouldn t i when i sat down to eat my lunch of soup and a banana i realized how sleepy i was then i recalled how i woke in the middle of night and evaluated the fact that i am not consuming as many calories and realized i would probably need a rest more than i need to battle traffic to hurry to the movie then battle traffic to hurry back to the studio so i took a rest i would love to say it made all the difference but i m not sure it did however leave me refreshed for my evening shift not depending on caffeine to keep me going for that i am grateful but still what does it mean to say no to live in balance this i am still learning living for so long suppressing the cues of my body has left me a bit out of touch yoga helps detoxing helps but mostly think i will just need time and practice practice listening practice weighing options and disciplining myself to choose just one practice appreciating the details of my daily life the sun shine in thru the doorway the way my cat contorts his body during a nap on the couch the smile of my honey when i come home all those things that get lost in my fear of missing out hello my name is christie and i am in process posted in ayurveda detox friends gratitude health summer work life writing yoga tagged ayurveda black panthers california chicago codependence detox raw diet rest spiritual renewal west oakland jul 25 what s in a name posted by livingisaprocess 0 there are plenty of labels to go around in my hood white trash ghetto hipster hipster wannabe dirty hippies damn kids lazy couch surfer drunk deadbeat dad smoker bum homeless guy beggar anarchist college kids lesbians preppies crazy religious not to mention the racist ones i refuse to repeat and the list goes on and on i mean i get it i m guilty of it just before writing this as i pulled out of the taco shop parking lot i saw a haggard looking family children running about an older looking grandpa like figure smoking a cigarette as he rode his bike around and in front of my car as i attempted to leave several labels immediately came to mind then another thought what if i looked at them with compassion and my perspective started to shift in light of today s ruling striking down indiana s ban on gay marriage i m reminded of a lot of labels that have been pretty prominent in my life for this past year gay homo fag abomination god damned when the only labels i ever recognized were friend family people i love as i sat listening to hours of testimony in january through two different hearings and hours of hurtful hateful labels my heart ached for these critics to see more to see the human behind the label to see their tears hear their cries understand their fearful hearts see that s the thing about labels they distance us from the human beneath the label they protect us and insulate us from wrestling with the paradigm shift that people who are different from us create they keep us from responding with compassion in fact they justify us not responding at all after all if i can find a label that proves that person deserves what they re getting then i have no responsibility to them and if they keep us from all those things they perpetuate hate and anger and war essentially every evil in this world starts with our simple judgment on one another it won t happen overnight it may not even happen in our lifetime but everyday should begin to serve as an opportunity to practice dropping the label or better yet converting it how about neighbor precious beautiful human brother sister friend posted in friends grace healing journey life love tagged healing hope human humanity hurting indiana label lgbt name calling jun 25 a long endurance posted by livingisaprocess 2 for mindy who i m pretty sure is the only one reading these days because she won t join facebook and still wants to keep up on me anonymously at the ripe ole age of 30 i ve finally decided what i want to do with my life or at least the path i want to be on where it leads me exactly i am still clueless but i know this it will include natural health yoga i ve been practicing yoga for several years now off and on my earliest experiences were with a y12sr group which stand for yoga and 12 step recovery yes it s a recovery group for addicts based on the 12 step model with yoga although i m not an addict a healthcare practitioner recommended i try it and i fell in love for the first hour we shared our struggles with one another and no one was allowed to respond to you with well you should pray more or maybe you should try ___ they simply listened we breathed together then another shared it was through these discussions that i began to realize how i struggle with co dependency then just as everything was loosened up emotionally we got onto our mats and this openly broken beautifully raw group of humans practiced together many tears were shed on that first mat of mine as years of wounds came to surface and were given space to heal when i began my naturopath program in the fall i knew i would somehow incorporate these two worlds i envisioned having a small practice and inviting a couple teachers to come in and lead classes in my mind natural healing and yoga are inseparable in classes i ve always craved hearing how certain moves and poses would enhance the functioning of organs or help me sleep better i knew i could never consult someone on healthy options without also suggesting a regular yoga practice i never thought i d teach it wasn t because i didn t have a desire but because i didn t find myself worthy of that path i have yogi friends who are stronger than me who can do headstands and have more regular practices my teachers all seemed so confident and proficient at yoga i didn t think i could ever measure up still i needed to change the path i was on so i reached out to my yoga teacher and asked if there were any studios in the city who could use my talents pr marketing etc and she directed me to the owner of the studio where i practiced when we met he explained i could take classes for free bonus and get a discount on teacher training i nodded not wanting to betray my interest but that hit home i knew this was the right decision and eventually i gained the confidence and the affirmation i needed to pursuing teaching yoga but money oh money how that little beast gets in the way i would only have part time hours at the studio so i decided to sell pampered chef to supplement my income so this is where things stand now money is stretched very thin as i work to pay off student loans pay for my naturopath program and save up for yoga teacher training i m learning to budget did you know the key to financial well being is to spend less than you make neither did i i m finally for the first time in my adult life understanding the true meaning of the word endurance i joke that this is my year for working and studying as i m doing one of the two nearly all the time a long endurance that s the phrase that keeps running thru my head when i reflect on this season it is both exhausting overwhelming frustrating and relieving exciting hopeful for the first time in my adult life i know what i want to do and i know the path i need to be on something within me leaps for joy but not too many times of course endurance takes all the strength i have to give but the results the outcomes well worth the work posted in endurance growing up journey life uncategorized work life yoga tagged endurance pampered chef yoga yoga teacher training jun 06 why teenagers should clean toilets posted by livingisaprocess 0 i recently read an article by a mom titled please don t help my kids read here the frustrated mom lays down some firm ground rules about assisting her kids at the playground while her tone seems to be a bit harsh i really appreciate the heart behind her words i appreciate her desire to race independent kids who know how to stand on their own two feet who can be creative original selves in a world that screams conformity who understand resilience because they ve practiced it endurance because that is the framework for their lives i began working when i was just 12 scoring my first few babysitting gigs with the children of my parents coworkers on one particular night as my dad was dropping me off he encouraged me to do the dishes and help straighten the house while the parents were away his thinking if you clean for them they will be wowed and want you back i took his advice cleaning the kitchen while the children played and watched movies the parents came home refreshed from a night away and ecstatic that they didn t have to deal with a mountain of dishes they paid me well and called me again that s when i learned the importance of adding value to my job doing that thing that took the position just another step further in quality at the age of 16 i decided to spend my summer working as a young counselor in training at the church camp i grew up attending me and the few other staff members my age were all considered too young rightly so to handle a cabin of campers on our own so we spent our days doing odds and ends jobs around the camp and our evenings nights with the campers i was put together with 2 other young girls to assist marilyn the housekeeper our daily job cleaning toilets we arose at 6 30a each morning moving quietly about the cabin careful not to wake the counselors and campers who didn t have to rise for at least another hour we ate breakfast together then set off in golf carts with cleaning supplies we cleaned every bathroom on the campus from the hair spray body wash fruitiness of the girls cabins with showers full of hair to the dingy dirty nastiness of the boys wash houses that wreaked of urine marilyn was a stickler about hair left in the drain so we scrubbed until the sinks shone and picked out every loose hair that lingered the boys had a nasty habit of clogging the conventional toilets and then turned to pooping in the urinals i d never touched poop until that summer and never have since we finished mid to late morning with the housekeeping went to lunch with all the campers and then i headed to the concession stand a little trailer with a fridge full of sodas and counter full of candy and sold sugar to children we stayed up too late laughing and joking about boys and i woke up too early the next day to repeat the cycle 14 years later i find myself in a fun rewarding position at a yoga studio where i get to interact with people and help build the busines...
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