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stone but we celebrated it as we have celebrated most of her recent birthdays by hosting a party at our house for close family and friends we knew she deserved a big birthday bash but we also knew she has reached the stage where a big birthday bash would overwhelm her even though i ve hosted my mom s birthday parties many times i was a little nervous about this year s celebration in previous parties we d made use of our back yard and patio and had yard games for everyone to play my husband even created tournaments complete with prizes for the winners i ll never forget the year my son told me i m playing grandma in bean bags and she s trash talking me grandma s going down i don t remember who actually won but i do remember it was close but this year the forecast called for rain that meant our 24 guests who ranged in age from 1 to 95 would probably be inside our rather small house one of my mom s good friends depends on a walker so navigating the porch steps would be challenging and since i don t have a table large enough for all our guests to sit down together to eat i wanted to serve a meal that could be eaten while simply sitting in a chair i also needed food that would appeal to both young children and elderly adults and that didn t require turning on my oven on a hot july afternoon it didn t help when i learned the bakery where i always get her cake was closed the week of her party none of these things were real problems but i wanted to make mom s party as nice as possible and since i have the ability to worry about anything and everything i fretted about the details but like most of the things i worry about her party turned out just fine it wasn t perfect but everyone seemed to have a good time my mother liked her cake her presents and most of all getting the chance to celebrate her 95th birthday with her family and friends no one complained about the food or the noise level when the kids got a little loud or even the difficulty of navigating steps with a walker it turns out that when people are gathered to celebrate the birthday of someone they love they don t sweat the small stuff i suppose one of the benefits of aging is learning the difference between what matters and what doesn t matter having a mother healthy enough to have a 95th birthday party is a gift that matters and i can only hope that this time next year i ll be able to write all about her 96th birthday party as well share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr print opens in new window print like loading assistance needed june 26 2025 june 26 2025 ann coleman 105 comments generally speaking i m not a fan of aging i don t care for the wrinkled skin the diminished stamina or the slow but sure progression of arthritis failing eyesight and declining memory when we were chatting with our favorite waiter at our favorite restaurant i wasn t pleased when the young man told us we were like a second set of grandparents to him i was actually a little offended calling us a second set of parents would have been a heart warming compliment calling us a second set of grandparents just made me realize how much i could benefit from a face lift nevertheless i am discovering there are benefits of aging that no one had ever told me about for instance i ve never been good at keeping up with current fashions and tend to simply wear the type of clothes i like when i was younger i was sometimes embarrassed at social gatherings when i realized my outfit wasn t even remotely like the clothes any other woman was wearing that s often still the case but i m no longer embarrassed by it no one expects a woman of my age to keep up with current trends and that s fine by me when i was young i wouldn t have asked a tall young man i didn t know to grab a six pack of soda off the top shelf for me fearing he d think i was trying to flirt with him it s supposedly common in grocery stores but just last week i had no problems doing just that when i realized my precious diet coke was out of reach the young man handed me my soda i thanked him and we each went our separate ways without a second thought but the main benefit of being a woman of a certain age is the ability to play the old lady card whenever it suits me i have learned that most young people have very low expectations of the aged and we can easily work that to our advantage i ve found that when someone younger than me tells me they can t help with whatever i need the best thing to do is simply stare at them in a confused manner say excuse me and wait it out they will almost always sigh roll their eyes and take care of the matter at hand trust me this works i ve had my new phone set up by an impatient young salesman who had assured me that wasn t his job gotten medical appointments scheduled after being told none were available and had disputed and incorrect charges removed from my accounts there are many more examples but my old lady brain can t recall them right now the point is if people believe you are old and helpless they will generally do things for you so wrinkles do have an advantage after all i ll end this now because i have to go visit my 94 year old mother while i m there i ll check her mail for bills that need to be paid take out her trash clean out her fridge and water her houseplants she used to do those things for herself but i do them now because she s so old and that means she couldn t possibly do them herself right right share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr print opens in new window print like loading memories june 12 2025 june 22 2025 ann coleman 85 comments the problem with travel is that it can be addictive as soon as i return from one trip i long to go on another one i guess that explains why i ve been checking travel websites ever since our return from our danube river cruise last month and fantasizing on what trip i d like to go on next sadly i m not in a position to indulge in unlimited travel opportunities so for now i ll just enjoy my memories i ve already printed off a huge stack of photos carefully noting the date and location on the back i know that sounds like a chore but it really isn t going through the photos has helped me relive the trip both the big moments and the little ones i remembered the relief of checking into our hotel room in budapest completely exhausted after our long and difficult flight we d learned the hotel was completely full and since we were checking in around 1 30 in the morning i figured we d be lucky to get a broom closet but when we opened the door to our room the lights switched on the curtains opened and we found ourselves staring at the nicest hotel room we d ever checked into the soaring ceilings were ornately carved the windows were floor to ceiling and there was a lovely sofa and coffee table at the foot of the king sized bed we had two huge closets a mini bar and a huge bathroom that sported two sinks and a shower the size of a walk in closet that was the moment i knew our luck had finally changed i remembered the shock that i felt when we reached durnstein for our castle hike and i looked up to see the castle we were hiking to was located way above the town i d thought i was in good shape but it wasn t long before my heart was beating a little too fast and my breath was coming a little too hard i knew it was time of stop for a break when the young man behind me asked are you okay do you need to sit down and when i was finally ready to go again he asked if i d like to take his arm say what you want about young people today but i know of at least one who was prepared to offer assistance to an old lady in need at least the view from above was worth it i remember the overwhelming sadness i felt when looking at the cast iron shoes lining the danube river memorializing the jews who were drowned there by the nazis in world war ii i remember being amazed at the intricate architecture on almost every building in each town s historic district and charmed by the picturesque small towns we passed while cruising along the river above all i remember feeling so grateful to the many people we encountered throughout our journey who were kind and patient with a couple of americans who did not speak their language it really is possible to transcend our differences and connect with people who live very far away from our homes and it feeds my hope and faith in human nature too i know that eventually we ll go on another nice vacation and i m hoping to get in at least one more international trip before i become too old and frail to truly enjoy it but whatever form it takes travel is truly a gift that takes us out of our normal routines and reminds us that there really is a great big world out there just waiting to be explored share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr print opens in new window print like loading a dream vacation may 24 2025 ann coleman 96 comments in my dreams i m still in europe even though we ve been back from our danube river cruise for over a week my subconscious seems to be stuck in vacation mode because every morning i wake up surprised to be back home rather than still roaming the cobblestone streets of linz or durnstein i guess some vacations just stick with us longer than others the days leading up to our trip were a bit stressful our dog finn decided that three days before we were supposed to leave was the ideal time to find a rabbit nest in the back yard and gulp down four baby bunnies an emergency trip to the vet took care of the problem but it was still an experience i could have happily lived without then we realized that the luggage we had packed exceeded our airline carrier s restrictions in both weight and size so we rushed to the store to buy smaller carry on suitcases and removed as many heavy items from the checked luggage as we could which turned out to be unfortunate because we removed the jackets and sweaters we were bringing just in case the weather turned out to be colder than forecasted which it did rendering at least half of what i d packed completely useless when we finally arrived in budapest at 1 30 in the morning did i mention the last leg of our flight was cancelled as we were preparing to board resulting in an unexpected 7 hour lay over in munich it seemed like a small miracle we were tired cranky and hungry but it didn t matter we were there we had two nights in a beautiful hotel with plenty of time to explore budapest before we boarded our ship on the danube river our cruise included stops in vienna linz bratislava durnstein passau spitz and vilshofen before we boarded a bus for a post cruise visit to prague i have never seen such beautiful architecture in my life nor heard so much about countries whose histories extend back to the roman times we had local tour guides in each stop who provided a fresh and authentic perspective that was very much appreciated and all too soon it was time to head to the airport at 3 30 in the morning for the long flight home i learned a lot on this trip including the fact that while i very much love being in europe i m now at the age where i m not such a fan of getting there and back but now that i m home and recovered i m still so very grateful i had the opportunity to go my husband and i have been wanting to do a danube river cruise for years this trip not only gave me memories that will last a lifetime it gave me something to dream about as well share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr print opens in new window print like loading no small thing april 9 2025 ann coleman 112 comments travel always wears me out last monday we returned from a quick weekend trip that included a wedding and a funeral in two different states the wedding was lovely and a great chance to reconnect with dear friends whose son was getting married the funeral was for my husband s favorite aunt a very sweet woman who will be greatly missed she had lived a good long life 100 years but saying goodbye to a beloved family member is never easy so when we returned home late monday afternoon we were tired we greeted our dog finn who welcomed us home as if we d been gone for years if not decades then we got on with unpacking sorting through our mail and airing out the house and vacuuming up all the dog hair afterwards all we wanted was to go somewhere for a quick meal i didn t have the energy to cook before coming home and falling into bed we went to a casual restaurant near our home and were pleased to be seated immediately there was a couple sitting a few tables away from us and when the woman looked up i realized that i recognized her i smiled and waved trying desperately to remember how i knew her i pointed her out to my husband who also smiled and waved but couldn t tell me why she looked so familiar either was she a neighbor someone we d seen regularly at our grandson s sporting events and then it hit me this was the woman who usually sits a few pews behind us at church i had no idea what her name was but she always smiled and said hello during the passing of the peace that mystery solved we settled in and ordered our food while we were eating the other couple left but she didn t make eye contact on their way out my husband and i eventually finished our meal and asked the waitress to bring the bill since we were both tired and cranky and wanted to get home to bed that s when we were told that our meal had already been paid for stunned we asked who had paid and the waitress said she didn t give us her name just said that she knew you two from church my husband and i looked at each other amazed someone we barely knew had picked up our tab and didn t even want any credit for it all of a sudden our cranky moods disappeared we may have been tired but how could we possibly stay cranky in the face of such an unexpected and undeserved kindness sometimes it helps to be reminded how many good people are still in this world sometimes all it takes to lift someone s spirits is a bit of kindness or a generous gesture in a world where we are all too often encouraged to be our worst selves it helps to see people being their best selves because they are setting the example the rest of us would do well to follow share this share on x opens in new 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