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Text of the page (random words):
for jose de jesus deniz sahagun 31 screams echoing off isolated cell walls copper teeth grinding against the ache of vacancy we keep mistaking detention center for death sentence he stuffed his esophagus with socks attempted to take his life 3 times before a testament to the torture behind closed doors for joaquin luna 18 who carved out his obituary in spiral notebooks god s greed gave him a gun holy bearer of bullets dressed in his sunday best he couldn t be an architect without papers so he sprinkled blueprints with lighter fluids envisioned the contrast of vermillion stains on his cream shirt formulated the spatial composition of the bathroom and his body mapped out his apology in blue blood he shot himself a week before receiving his college acceptance letter i can t bear anymore eulogies my bedtime stories are news reports sometimes i can t tell real from fake alternative facts scream ice raids in the wrong places tombstones cluttered my closet each inscription with the date scraped out from when i wanted to die at 7 10 13 15 home is only 3 letters away from homily and i will worship every god to keep this family whole turn our bodies into sanctuary welcome to this holy house i keep waiting for a resurrection but the dead don t dance on the devil s back arlene campa a response to 100hardtruths fakenews 20 stress related to immigration status is one result see its video poem 17 created at a second workshop with get lit here https partnerandpartners gitlab io alex juhasz media new html this poem was written by arlene campa in march 2018 at a workshop at get lit an la group for youth poetry posted by mp me filed in 2024 blog redo anti fascist anti racist critical pedagogy fake news feminist praxis tags fake news leave a comment online premier please hold featuring writers from aids and the distribution of crises february 13 2025 please join editors and writers from the collection aids and the distribution of crises duke 2020 as we screen together and then discuss my new experimental documentary please hold 70 mins 2025 the event will be a zoom webinar saturday march 8 3 5 pm est sign up is here the event will feature conversation among these amazing aids workers all writers for the anthology my co editors dr jih fei cheng and dr nishant shahani and hiv aids scholars organizers and artists with associated interests in long covid disability justice queer and trans media and history documentary and more cecilia aldarondo pablo alvarez pato hebert cait mckinney quito ziegler if you can t make this screening and conversation or the in person premier at the parkside lounge on the lower east side on march 2 not to worry please hold is available on the official project website at no cost reflecting my commitment to accessibility and collective engagement you are encouraged to watch the video with others by organizing screenings and other gatherings that can honor the legacy of those lost to aids and other illnesses as well as those living with them aligned with the project s ethos audience members are invited to contribute reflections images and other responses after their screening to an online collection framegrab of grid from please hold james robert lamb pato hebert alexandra juhasz juanita mohammed szczepanski that s there the political analysis is like much else in my practice this is a diy video and diy release organized around conversation community and interaction here s more info about context suggested viewing conditions and discussion and here s where you order the video for free posted by mp me filed in activist media aids chronic illness covid disability justice documentary feminist feminist digital space long covid media archive pandemic technlogies please hold praxis tags aids and the distribution of crises cait mckinney cecilia aldarondo documentary jih fei cheng nishant shahani pablo alvarez pato hebert quito ziegler leave a comment march premiers of please hold my experimental aids video february 12 2025 i am so pleased to announce the premiere of my latest experimental documentary please hold 70 mins 2025 my first personal video in nearly fifteen years online and in person edited by matthew hittle and paul hill this intimate and evocative work will debut at the iconic parkside lounge in new york s lower east side on march 2 2025 at 5 pm tickets here as part of a dynamic multisensory community based experience before the screening 3 5 pm attendees are invited to bring and share personal objects that hold memories of hiv aids the lower east side or the parkside lounge co sponsored by the mix nyc queer experimental film festival and visual aids the event emceed by high profile nyc drag queen linda simpson will conclude with a live performance by christeene whose music is featured in the video it will be a memorable mix of joy community and remembrance as is the video itself at its core please hold explores the intersections of activism memory and media through a profoundly personal yet communal lens drawing from decades of diy activist video two deeply intimate death bed legacy recordings and conversations with living aids workers the documentary creates a layered meditation on the ways we hold and shed loss memory and collaborators interrogating the questions how do neighborhoods sweaters and scarves videotapes and queer bars hold ghosts how do we let them go still from please hold juanita mohammed szczepanski in wave self portraits vhs 1990 shot on a mix of consumer grade recording devices iphone zoom vhs camcorder and super 8 film the documentary is an homage to grassroots aids mediamaking across decades and its ability to capture intimate honest communication about hope and loss it is anchored by legacy videos shot on their request of two of my closest collaborators and friends james robert lamb 1963 1993 taped in 1992 and juanita mohammed szczepanski 1957 2022 shot in 2022 their voices are joined by contemporary aids workers jih fei cheng marty fink pato hebert and ted kerr culminating in a poignant sequence filmed at the parkside lounge a site layered with queer history and ghosts memories and present day stories of aids following the in person premiere i will host a global online screening and conversation with writers for my co edited collection aids and the distribution of crises including the book s co editors jih fei cheng and nishant shahani documentary filmmaker cecilia aldarondo aids scholar pablo alvarez artist and long covid organizer pato hebert queer media scholar cait mckinney and artist quito ziegler on march 8 at 3 5pm et tickets here in addition on march 22 please hold will close the picture lock film series at the wexner center for the arts where i edited the documentary in residence at their storied film video studio jim and alex in please hold iphone video and vhs please hold will be available on the official project website at no cost reflecting my commitment to accessibility and collective engagement viewers are encouraged to watch the video with others by organizing screenings and other gatherings that can honor the legacy of those lost to aids and other illnesses as well as those living with them aligned with the project s ethos audience members are invited to contribute reflections images and other responses after their screening to an online collection and to consider donating to support holding patterns a community based installation of the project that debuted at the mimesis documentary festival in boulder colorado in august 2024 showcasing paper transcripts of interviews aids books and queer magazines death bed legacy videos online archives photos and the four complete hour long zoom interviews with aids workers that were used in making the documentary holding patterns interrogates the ways we learn mourn and remember differently across mediums and archives by juxtaposing analog and digital technologies from vhs tapes to zoom grids sweaters to porn magazines holding patterns navigates the flattening and deepening of attention connection and care in the wake of technological shifts the installation is designed to be responsive to community based placement in spaces imbued with memory and activism such as queer bars libraries archives bookstores or feminist and trans community centers new iterations are planned for the center s pat parker vito russo center library in new york city in spring summer and the one archives at the usc libraries in los angeles in the fall more information about please hold including archival materials interviews and details on organizing your own screening or installation can be found on www pleaseholdvideo com tickets for the in person premier at the parkside lounge on march 2 2025 at 5 pm are available here for the online premier on march 8 at 3 5pm et registrations can be made here any questions please reach out i am eager to share the video and or installation to those ready to hold its and my commitments to interaction communal engagement and careful attention to loss love memory and community posted by mp me filed in activist media aids camcorder chronic illness covid disability justice documentary feminist long covid media archive please hold praxis tags cait mckinney cecilia aldarondo christeene james robert lamb jih fei cheng juanita mohammed szczepanski lgbtq linda simpson marty fink mix nyc nishant shahani pablo alvarez parkside lounge pato hebert please hold queer quito ziegler ted kerr visual aids leave a comment poetry from reflection and compassion for the loss january 22 2025 on the night of the inauguration i was lucky enough to watch an online reading of powerful poems 1 of 2 from winter in american again poets respond to the 2024 election while letting little else fill my screens as had been my commitment i was reminded of the warmth and magnetism of communities of the sane the ethical the artists thank you book editors and participating poets for inviting me in then only then did i also remember my similar effort i can t tell if my 2022 book of poems by workshop participants not the astounding writers you ll see above but poets nevertheless is tragic useful or both in any case it s free like so many inspirational resources from the amazing punctum books the lengthy process that ultimately coalesced as this book about breaking through media manipulation began over the previous first 100 days of the very same president when fake news felt catastrophic now conjoined with environmental and genocidal cataclysms as well as his return technology s and his lies are known knowns i offer this now because perhaps poetry can reveal a few more real people s truths just as i experienced watching readings from winter in america again this book of poems about fake news written by diverse project participants is foremost an invitation and invocation for readers to participate with others in an experiment in knowing and working differently with the internet fake news poetry workshops between 2018 and 2020 alexandra juhasz directed more than twenty of these workshops around the world and these are ongoing beyond the confines of this book each differs in form and structure but participants are always asked to attend to research their own knowledge about the internet and social media and what they can learn from their workshop and previous ones my phone lies to me shares the poems created in the workshops as moving eloquent and useful as they may be and you are invited to indulge in and learn from them enjoying and learning from the poems is only a small part of this book s project four short essays two by juhasz with a foreword and afterword by critical internet scholars tara mcpherson and margaret rhee respectively introduce and situate the project s processes of radical digital media you can learn what fake news poetry workshops make do and believe in as well as how to collaborate with others to create your own fake news poetry workshops are one way to counter dominant and dominating internet modes and values to fight the corrupt ways of being and knowing that use digital media to create fuel and weaponize fake news the project verifies good news in the face of fake news that we can gather together in our many local places and use analog structures about digital things and ways to generate hold and share art answers to phony questions posted by mp me filed in 2024 blog redo fake news feminist media archive media publishing praxis tags margaret rhee my phone lies to me poem poems poet poetry punctum books tara mcpherson winter in american again leave a comment together through the process a final summary as lights go out january 19 2025 it s a rehearsing when i speak to you because i trust you and this is part of a set of conversations that have happened over time we re practicing as it were what it is that i think this new solidarity means nick mirzoeff rehearsing solidarity by writing and speaking what i love about collaboration is the way that we re co becoming together creating who we are and our difference together in the process of creating something for other people alex martinis roe publish the process together we can see the complexity of culture society and each other in ways that are so important for counteracting the very homogenizing concretizing limiting scarcity fueled narratives that get amplified in these periods of fascism it s such an important antidote if you can commit to it and sustain and find enough people who want to sustain it no one person can do it alone aymar jean christian the audience as cookout if i were to dream about or have a sort of ideal what would the first year look like it would be having and building community that can help to make a young life thrive in community in a world that people are trying to make healthier and better not just for this one life but more broadly anonymous we ll just keep doing those things in our families of choice i m realizing in part through your blog posts 1 and their understanding of the different kinds of communities that can form some of them planned some of them spontaneous i also need to participate in something that s going to contribute more directly to this political moment something more communitarian gavin mccormick dawn of a new practice that s the feeling of solidarity that s the feeling that we want to extend across the entire world but certainly across our campus joseph entin and mobina hashmi the payoffs of solidarity so while corporatized digital technologies often network and link as ways of potentially amplifying and scaling what we have seen is linking in order to intensify and come together as opposed to scale and dissipate nishant shah intimate links the act of filming or even audio recording an interview with someone this is a very profound act and so i don t underestimate what small groups can accomplish and the kind of resonance they can have in the culture and the kind of change that they can evoke erin cramer groovy women can do groovy things thin...
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