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shake dried oregano on top of the spread out sauce and some garlic powder hormel pepperoni jimmy dean loose sausage meat i lightly cook it first to cut the grease but you don t have to cheese this is probably the most important part i use the best cheese possible it s important to use whole milk mozzarella most grocery store mozzarella is part skim milk go to your deli where they have sliced meat they usually have mozzarella made with whole milk i also sprinkle on a little extra sharp cheddar in my opinion kraft cracker barrell extra sharp cheddar is the best tasting store bought cheese in your typical cheese section if you want to be really fancy go to a cheese shop where they have amazing selections and you can actually taste them bristol farms and whole foods are great for that before after now eat the hell out of it and now to set your mood my favorite comments leave a comment tags amy s big nicks california pizza kitchen casa bianca pizza cheese chicago cpk dean martin digiorno freschetta hormel jimmy dean lady the tramp miceli s nyc pepperoni pizza recipe sausage wolfgang puck categories comfort food food pizza recipes uncategorized comfort food junkie 25 02 2010 my name is ryan black and i m a comfort food junkie is it even possible to not like comfort food i have no idea i have no real grasp on that anything that has butter or cheese or sugar or flour is usually on my daily menu my friend aimee is allergic to dairy and the only meat she eats is fish i don t know how she does it i just can t imagine my life without dairy and lots of it no cheese no butter that s one of my worst nightmares i need my dairy fix and i need it now how do i do it and keep my girlish figure i don t 1 year ago i was 40 pounds heavier gaining weight is definitely not a problem for me for as long as i can remember i ve also always been afraid of gaining weight for as long as i can remember i come from a family of weight gain both of my parents have yo yo ed my dad s done the most yo yoing of both but both have maintained being overweight my whole life my younger sister is probably the most overweight while my older sister i have maintained our weight fairly well fat runs in the family i guess my grandparents were fat but oddly my great grandparents weren t is it the crap in our food now is it the go go grab go of our daily life i m sure there are many contributing factors i can pretty much only speak for my own eating habits i can say this though about my younger sister and that is she is almost completely unaware of what she eats she lived with me for a short while a couple years ago and she always talked about how she didn t eat any more than any other person then she would have 3 doughnuts and a coke i love my sister don t get me wrong but i think one of the biggest problems is that people aren t aware of what they eat this is why they tell you to log the food down that you eat in a journal i think most people would be shocked you hear it all the time everything in moderation balance i m not exactly worthy of calling my daily meals balanced but i can say i am acutely aware of everything i eat and take full responsibility for it i started becoming aware of weight and eating at a very young age i can remember all the way back to summer camp when i was 8 and i didn t want to take my shirt off at the pool because i thought i was fat this stigma went on for many years i remember my mom saying time and time again you don t want to grow up to be fat like mom and dad do you yes mom it s my dream to be fat just like you and dad of course not hello who wants to be fat growing up i was teased for the junk in my trunk even my parents called me bubble butt although when i grew to be an adult i fully embraced my bubble butt and realized it was an asset pun intended i remember when i was in little league yes i played baseball and was pretty damned good thank you back to back home runs a triple in one game to lead my team to division champs anyhow when i was in little league i can remember this kid looking at my legs in my tight white baseball pants and i said what are you looking at he said you have fat legs i think my response was yeah well you re gay i think he was actually and wasn t that the pot calling the kettle ryan black i can remember back to 1st or 2nd grade when little mark emmons saw my mom after she dropped me off and said your mom is fat i never saw her that way and i went home that day and cried to my mom about what he said it really disturbed me besides my mom wasn t obese she just had a lot of junk in the trunk in high school it got worse i was always dieting one day and eating a hostess cherry pie the next day my grandmother always shopped on hsn and was a sucker for gadgets and deals one time she bought richard simmons deal a meal it was this little pocket book folder with cards on one side and slots on the other each card had a food group on it and every time you ate something on that card you moved it over to the slots when your cards were gone you couldn t eat anymore she used it for a week and then i took it it actually taught me a lot about eating my cards were usually folded by lunch eek well schools have horrible menu items and snack bars it s too easy to eat like shit in high school endless amounts of sugar and fat the straw that drank its last milk shake was when i was in college in a dance class and my ballet teacher casey colgan said i needed to lose ten pounds we wore tights in class which was completely mortifying to me to begin with they showed everything i even had cellulite that was humiliating a boy with cellulite i d ask god why god why me why cellulite yeah i was pretty dramatic a couple months later i left school and came home when i got home i got my first gym membership at 18 that was it no one anymore is going to comment on my fat my ass my legs or anything else negatively related to my body i m taking control kind of at least control of me well i was never really that consistent at it but it was a start i started learning about running and weight lifting and cardio and heart rates and body fat ratios i wouldn t say i became obsessed but i definitely started to notice a difference and i liked that i ve continued over the years going back and forth to gyms in the last year i ve been my most successful 2 years ago i was at the fattest i ve ever been i know exactly how it happened i was depressed i was unmotivated i felt empty food ah my lovely friend it s always there for you isn t it i know it s always there for you because there s a 300 pound homeless man that stands outside of 7 11 all the time asking for food or money i usually opt to give him money back to my weight gain i am a control freak and a perfectionist and i m cast as type a so this can go one way or weigh or the other when my career is down my weight is up when my career is up my weight is down when my love life is down my weight is up when my love life is up my weight is down some of these things you d think would be the opposite as a control freak why can t i control it all i think because i give up control to try to control the other why can t they coexist they can we just try to fill voids in our life things get boring monotonous redundant repetitive or any other adjective you d like to choose as an excuse i had to choose to control it all i m not happy being over weight i m not even that happy eating that horrible food well that might be a lie i love a big mac a hostess cherry pie pizza blah blah blah but i realized i could have my cupcake and eat it too i had to get control of my life and my weight again for the clothes buying experience alone there s nothing more frustrating than not being able to fit into anything because your eyes still see your old waist size i d eyeball jeans and try them on only to be shocked that they didn t fit i didn t understand i didn t look that much fatter to me i have the fortune or misfortune of gaining weight fairly equally on my whole body with a special nod to my legs and ass it takes me a while to notice my weight gain this is why it became imperative for me to measure my own body sounds like a pain but especially when you re working out it s important muscle does weigh more than fat and the scale does nothing to show you that so each week i would log my measurements head to toe contrary to popular belief my head never increased in size this was excited to me seeing the progress or lack thereof was both motivating and fun i don t always like to workout but i started to find things that i love i love to hike our local canyon called runyon i love to see the difference in measurements i love the pina colada protein smoothie at the end of my workout wish it had rum in it though i love the music on my ipod i shudder to say i love my orgasm more tee hee i love getting out of my home office and seeing the world i love a good stretch at the end of working out so peaceful and tranquil you have to find the joy it s work like everything else but it s all in how you set your mind i m not saying i don t fall off or have a day where i don t want to but you have to find the joy in it and everything for that matter it s too easy to bring the negative into everything and i m as guilty as anybody if not more so of that there are very few things we have total control of in our life we can t control that annoying person on their phone in the car in front of us we can t control our friends who make the wrong choices we can t control the person who has 20 items in the 15 items or less line we can t control the people who don t pick up their dog shit we can t control the idiot at my gym who clearly doesn t believe in bathing i could go on for hours but we can control our own bodies isn t that empowering to think we spend so much time trying to control so many things around us while paying little attention to the one thing you can control the most and that s you you are the most important person in your life without you you can t make a difference in the world without you you can t make the company you work for better without you your kids or your dog for that matter wouldn t have a better life it all starts with you it s like when they tell you on an airplane if we re going down put your mask on first then put a mask on your child that always sounded odd to me because your child should always be first but your child is history if you pass out from lack of oxygen so you have to take control of your own air first so that your child has someone to rely on that bachelor wall street guy sitting next to you s not gonna be thinkin of your kid while he s cryin for mama so enough of the oprah hour and back to comfort food i guiltlessly present to you last nights comfort food i had a couple t bones in the freezer and really wanted a meat potatoes meal i made au gratin potatoes and oh mah gaw all in moderation right that s why both dana i paused american idol to get seconds i ll give you the recipe here for both that my candied carrots i call kettle carrots then i will go work out for 2 hours ohhh gratin potatoes serves 8 or 4 in my family 5 med white potatoes 1 white onion 6 pieces bacon 1 1 2 c milk 1 4 cup cream 1 1 2 c extra sharp cheddar cheese grated 1 4 c sour cream 3 tbl flour 2 tbl butter 1 2 tsp paprika pepper salt parsley preheat oven to 400f first i slice the onions potatoes with a mandolin i bought my first mandolin a couple months ago and i love it i don t know how i lived so long with out one it s oxo brand and it looks like this they have them at william sonoma sur la table bed bath beyond i believe for 39 i m sure they re online as well well worth it so either slice both potatoes and onion thin or on the mandolin i do 1 16th cut you may like them thicker depends on your taste you re in control see put a pot of boiling salted oiled water on the stove for potatoes in the meantime fry the bacon to a chrisp remove to paper towel reserve 2 tbl of bacon grease and put into a medium sauce pan over medium heat put the butter into the saucepan and melt with bacon grease slowly whisk flour in to make a roux thickener immediately whisk in milk and cream bring to a simmer and turn off heat mix your cheese into this and then your sour cream add paprika salt pepper to taste if you think it s too thick add a little milk and heat on low for a minute or two chop two tbl parsley and crumble bacon in your boiling water add the potatoes onions carefully boil only for 2 minutes and completely drain being careful not to break the potatoes in a gratin or casserole dish sprayed with cooking spray layer potatoes bacon sauce in that order twice then top with parsley more paprika and pepper if you like bake at 400 for about 35 minutes until golden and bubbly on top i like it a little more done so i bake for about 40 45 mins kettle carrots serves 2 1 2 pound carrots i get the already peeled prepared kind 1 tbl butter or margarine 1 tbl brown sugar pinch of salt boil the carrots in a medium sauce pan for about 10 minutes drain in the same pan melt butter then add salt sugar blend until combined completely about 1 minute or less add carrots toss swirl around in pan serve ohh gratin the dish comments 3 comments tags au gratin potatoes butter candied carrots carrots cellulite cheese comfort food dairy exercise fat gym hostess kettle carrots motivation oprah oxo paula dean paula deen recipe rosie o donnell sugar sur la table weight gain weight loss william sonoma working out categories comfort food food recipes uncategorized take that jive turkey pot pie 24 02 2010 so i told you last night i d post about my turkey pot pies i made last night but first i must gripe i get on facebook this morning check my messages to find this ______________ jack february 24 at 8 51am report can you do me a favor and stop sending me invites for bananas in my freezer thanks ______________ fair enough my reply ____________ ryan black february 24 at 10 36am sure but why dont you just unfriend me if it s that annoying to you i m just promoting myself my future book just like you do when you post things about your band peace ____________ now i m not innocent of being annoyed by posts on facebook but i simply delete them or press ignore i mean is it really that hard this guy posts really annoying things all the time about his horrible band things he thinks are funny and i don t but do i ask him to stop no there s a guy who s a real estate agent in chicago that constantly asks me to join his page for real estate in chicago does it annoy me yes it s every fucking day for two weeks what do i do i delete him i m not in chicago ya idiot nor do i want real estate there it s very simple mind you i ve only had bananas in my freezer for about 4 days and i ve sent out requests maybe 2 or 3 times too aggressive for my first week i don t know i don t care if you don t like it delete me i don t give a care and i certainly won t miss you it s that simple ya jive turkey as george jeffe...
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