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Text of the page (random words):
ity to super tingle when the great leader speaks rachel maddow s man hands super grip obama enormous ears to listen in on opposition and supervision eyes that can read teleprompter at 100 yards harry reid s high girly voice and vagina hole they were going to use his penis but he didn t have one also hermaphrodite will appeal to lgbt crowd al gore voice slow drawl entrances enviro lib tards into a frenzy hillary clinton taint michael moore abdomen absorbs any frontal attack and repels all women ted kennedy s liver kept in a jar on marthas vineyard must have powers to have left him in senate that long matt damon s brain he won t miss it spewing nonsensical pseudo intellectual crap 24 7 michael bloomberg mouth and butthole as both can simultaneously spew shit in all directions god save us if this creature is actually made posted by shrodingers cat at tuesday march 26 2013 1 comments tuesday february 12 2013 health tip like many americans you may have occasional bloating or constipation activia prunes or even miralax haven t helped clear the estimated 6 lbs of waste in your colon tonight provides the perfect opportunity to cleanse your colon and purge the waste take your laptop and sit on the commode to stream the president s state of the union speech be forewarned there may be some cramping and sweating so tell the family not to be alarmed but if you are a critical thinking person who knows a little about history and economics are concerned about the country and not just when your check will arrive or what time the abortion clinic opens or when your partner will be back from the courthouse with your marriage certificate then i assure you this will be explosive it is involuntary and you will shit like a caged animal the first movement will be when he tells you we are on the right path the second will be when he tells you it will take a while to clean up this mess he inherited can you really inherit a mess you made the third will be when he tells you non citizens have a right to the free stuff just like all the other people that voted for him and he doesn t care how much debt he has to accumulate to give it to them the final explosion will be when he says we just need to do a little more more money for those shovel ready jobs solar panel companies and battery companies we can sell to china we just haven t done enough and we just need to remove a little more cash from the productive private sector to jump start this economy with non productive non producing crap hole projects history be damned no matter that hoover and then roosevelt extended the depression 6 7 years longer than necessary with make work projects regulations subsidies a war on the private sector and handouts with unemployment averaging 18 20 per cent throughout the 30s i guess then it would have been a fireside chat that got the bowels moving in that day and age but i think most people were either stupid or duped and just retained their feces or that the trillions spent trying to fulfill johnson s war on poverty has left us with a higher percentage in poverty now than in 1963 screw that those guys just didn t know what they were doing regardless of the exact content of the speech i assure you that tomorrow morning i will have a colon you could eat off of libtards can use this time alone with the community activist in chief to masturbate themselves into a socialist frenzy either way take some extra toilet paper posted by shrodingers cat at tuesday february 12 2013 4 comments friday january 11 2013 honest anonymous adieu due to stick spammers anonymous comments are no longer enabled sorry frank and scrn but it s twenty spam comments a day and i haven t posted in a while love what our president is doing though he rocks posted by 911doc at friday january 11 2013 2 comments thursday december 13 2012 attention parents given that our republic was founded on indivdualistic principles and given that in theory we are a meritocracy i hate to be the bearer of bad news but here it is tell junior to put down the books put down the violin and pick up the basketball football soccer ball or baseball get your kids on a travel team early get them a personal trainer dance teams and cheerleader camp if they are not completey hopeless on the field or court if they fail then coaching pays well and remains a meritocracy alternatively you may want to model your child s upbringing thusly or encourage him to pick up the electric guitar at an early age so that he or she may follow in the very deep footprints of mr levine of course if you do this they will inevitably end up as brain dead leftists but they will not want for money this is what remains of our meritocracy not to worry if you choose to raise your children to work hard study hard get good grades and become professionals he or she may luck into a government job such as i have now where my pay is fixed but in my government clinic there are many days like today where we keep losing electical power and have to reboot our computers each time making it impossible to see patients i still get paid so there is that and i have time to write a post like this but by no means allow them to go into medicine at least not on the provider side if they like medicine have them go into medical administration those jobs will be plentiful will pay more than provider jobs and can be obtained with a two year degree the pursuit of mediocrity is made more bearable by alcohol so you may want to introduce them to this early and often foreward posted by 911doc at thursday december 13 2012 3 comments thursday november 22 2012 congrats just wanted to say congrats to all the libtards out there on your great victory as a small business owner yes jackasses i did build that and health care provider you took it upon yourselves to re elect a socialist who wants to take everything i ve earned and control my livelihood especially want to give a shout out to those single issue female voters your fear that someone was going to stop you from sucking the fetus out of your vagina hole that last appletini before some random frat dude knocked you up sure was tasty has relegated any kids you do have to a life of abject poverty and reliance on government choke down a few free birth control pills and that wont happen again of note i purchased a special shredder for applicants to the company who list women s studies as a major it makes a beautiful whirring sound the good news is i no longer have to contribute to any charities as all distributions will come from a 10 square mile cesspool on the potomac there are a few iffy ones i may consider you know those scary ones with some religious message but in their envelope i now send back the following dear sirs in light of recent events my disposable income will be dropping precipitously i believe your cause may be just but you may be better off looking to the government for a handout if they refuse and you can provide me with signed affidavits of the chairman and a majority of the board of directors as to who you voted for and the amount of government subsidy received over the past 4 years i will consider you an organization worthy of a portion of my meager remaining income sincerely someone who did build it posted by shrodingers cat at thursday november 22 2012 59 comments wednesday november 07 2012 o care incoming open post docs let me know what your plans are regarding o care use the comment section below tell me what you do now and tell me what you are planning to do differently if anything when ocare hits look forward to your responses posted by 911doc at wednesday november 07 2012 13 comments tuesday october 30 2012 sideline money sideline docs talk to an investment guy talk to a real estate gal talk to a banker and you will hear that there s scads of money on the sidelines pending the election conventional wisdom amongst most of the money folks is that a romney win will be a quick and clear signal for people to invest again in the private sector i hope it s true it feels true but there is something no one is talking about and that s the sideline doctors every single physician in this country is watching this election with keen interest for many it will be the deciding factor in whether they practice to retirement or they retire early and cut back on work under obamacare academic physicians are the only ones i have met who are consistently for obamacare the ones who will be honest with me are scary statists and i would dearly love to punch them in the nose it is i think the only thing they would understand so just like with investments real estate and finance in general medicine also has tons of it s resources now on the sidelines hard to plan for the future when you don t know what the rules will be hard to start a practice much less build one when you aren t sure what obamacare will mean to your bottom line hard to commit to the hardest profession in the world when it might mean that you work for a government flunkie with a g e d reading from a manual and lecturing you about compassion and diversity again punching in the face seems one s only option here and doctors are averse as a rule to going to re education camps in all seriousness if romney wins and obamacare is scrapped then i predict the following 1 the impending doctor shortage will be averted by physicians choosing to continue practice or return to practice also applications to medical schools will boom 2 research and development of new treatments and drugs will take off 3 many who are now choosing to become physician assistants may reconsider and go to medical school 4 the left will have a seizure because of 4 above and because there is a large portion 20 of citizens and illegal aliens who will continue to favor beer cigarettes and cell phones over health insurance i think romney will have to replace it with something but that something while it will no doubt have it s problems will not turn the great american health care system into the n h s or brazil go mitt posted by 911doc at tuesday october 30 2012 10 comments labels death panels government medicine governmental idiocy liverpool protocol obamacare friday october 26 2012 revelation just had to put this down on paper this was a revelation similar to that which came to john could have just been a spicy burrito but it seemed so real that i woke up in a sweat and something said to write it down this is the revelation to s cat i found myself rowing in a rowboat on what seemed like an endless sea skies were dark and hunger pangs followed every row in the distance i see a large shining golden ship with the skies opened above it i rowed faster and faster and finally reached the beacon the ship was called america and as i got closer the gold was wearing off in many places and in others was being covered over with spray paint by two men with overalls that said guvment wurkers i climbed aboard up a steep ladder reaching the top deck of the america i am overcome with the smell of pot patchouli and feces smelly people are relaxing and occupying much of the front of the ship while periodically someone with the aforementioned overalls comes by with a cart of granola bars clean needles and condoms after nearly passing out i moved further onto the bridge a huge golden box labeled goodies with an eagle on the top sits at the center of the deck with guards and a lock it seems this box is periodically opened but only after an amount of begging and a promise of allegiance to the captain to my left off port side is a large hot tub there seem to be laughing kids and one older gentleman whom they call uncle barney but i heard a man with sunglasses refer to him congressman frank suddenly i saw bubbles in the center of the tub and out from under the water came two gentlemen who were hi fiving each other and uncle barney the one they called bill mar said to the one called john s ha and you said on your comedy show i couldn t smoke barney s hog for 3 minutes underwater where s my 5 dollars i would have done it for free ya know after vomiting in my mouth i moved towards the bow where a scene of sheer horror was occurring blood and screeching were seen and heard where the free abortion clinic was set up in a tent nancy i love doing these it is their right but i just love it said the older plastic appearing lady a frightened young girl with a planned parenthood flier told me her name was barbara the boxer or something like that in the center of the deck was the captains quarters i had noticed from the moment i got on the boat that it had been listing to the left and we were turning left in addition ships that i saw way off on the horizon were now getting closer standing at the window was a mocha appearing man whose behavior cadence seemed to change depending on who walked in there seemed to be a parade of mob bosses black panthers guilt ridden white people and ceos whose pockets were bulging when they left the quarters standing behind him was somewhat of a clownish character with white hair licking an ice cream cone and hitting a paddle ball the man at the wheel whose name i learned was barack just kept saying settle down joe we ll be there soon the wheel house was directly adjacent to the captains quarters and in it there were 3 or 4 snot nosed college kids struggling hard to turn the gigantic wheel to the left chants of yes we can and obama kept emanating from their mouths like zombies asking for more brains i could tell the ship was listing hard to the left and yelled at them to straighten the course but my reasoning fell on deaf and brainwashed ears not only that the cries of allah akbar could now clearly be heard from men on the ships that were on the horizon but were now very close i hurried down the stairs the patrons on the lower levels we hard at work shoveling coal into the beast of the engines these were people who despite what was going on up on the deck continued to use their resources and talents to keep the ship afloat but as the ship continued to list more and more i witnessed a mass exodus from the ship to the lifeboats the persons responsible for making the ship move were leaving taking their coal with them i knew then it was time for me to leave as well as i boarded a life boat i i saw a mad scramble on the deck i was afraid they would catch on eventually we ll for the others it is too late this one s for you dad she s going down said the mocha man leader then suddenly pow a huge explosion tore open the side of the ship planted by one of the foreigners everyone on the upper deck was either too stupid stoned or self loathing because they didn t seem to care that this mighty ship was going down they just stood behind the golden box which during the explosion had come open with the bow now rising high in the water the scene resembled an adult birthday party with a huge golden pinata spilling food stamps birth control pills disability rating cards social security cards and many freebies i didn t even recognize what ...
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