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Text of the page (random words):
h god produces a security within ourselves that will in turn enable greater elasticity in our engagement with others far from encountering difference as a form of threat we will experience it as an opportunity to learn and grow as i have learned through my many life transitions identity crises present a beautiful opportunity to return to our source and deepen our roots in his love the questions they raise can lift our eyes to the grand narrative from which we derive our meaning and in which we currently participate if we know who we are from where we draw our value and to whom we belong we can be open to those around us able to receive the gifts and absorb the shocks that come through our interactions far from encountering difference as a form of threat we will experience it as an opportunity to learn and grow i urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received be completely humble and gentle be patient bearing with one another in love make every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace there is one body and one spirit just as you were called to one hope when you were called one lord one faith one baptism one god and father of all who is over all and through all and in all but to each one of us grace has been given as christ apportioned it in 2021 our tribalism is competing with our identity in christ threatening to transcend the unity we share as his church among the saints at ephesus just as in the church of our day one lord one faith one baptism does not negate our differences rather it encompasses them tethering us all to a shared center this is the holy common ground on which we take our stand until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the son of god and become mature attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of christ ephesians 1 3 5 2 18 20 3 14 18 4 1 7 4 13 share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like loading attachment belonging belovedness church community ephesians identity crisis identity formation intimacy labelling oppositional identity polarization relationship leadership spiritual formation weak humans safe leaders our need for ongoing nurture of the soul june 7 2021 tiffany clark 2 comments good leadership is a big ask it entails unravelling intricate relational knots settling ruffled emotions overseeing controversial decisions and guiding others forward through trying circumstances all while experiencing them ourselves we hold ideals for what our leadership should look like participatory humble wise meeting people where they are and yet frequently find ourselves responding in ways that don t match up with our intentions our best laid plans for building up others and bringing about needed change get hijacked among other things by our own stress behaviors and unintended reactions i don t have to look far for an example of this in my own leadership a few years back i was asked to develop and facilitate a spiritual formation program for a group of global leaders months of careful preparation led up to what i hoped would be a sacred space for honest self examination vulnerable sharing with others and transformative encounter with god but the week did not unfold as i had imagined some of my sessions fell flat my content and style met with critique and i myself found it difficult to connect with people in the moment i could tell that i wasn t responding to the situation with the level of flexibility and grace that i aspire to but what i couldn t see was how my reactivity was shutting down the very processes i was trying to facilitate where was the breakdown and what within my way of being had so radically interfered with my way of doing as humans the state of our soul inevitably affects the quality of our leadership leadership does not happen in a vacuum we are humans before we are leaders whether we are aware of it or not we carry our inner selves shaped by our ongoing experiences and deepest needs into our leadership this functions both as an asset and a liability our humanity enables us to relate with others to share with them the comfort that we have received and to point them to the hope that we ourselves have walked deeply with jesus to take hold of and yet our humanity also gets in the way of our ability to relate with others exhaustion anxiety and insecurity hinder our capacity to love as god loves and our own unmet needs can produce reactions that distance and destroy rather than nurture and build up in my case recent developments in our family situation had re surfaced deep insecurities about my personal significance and my sense of acceptability before others we had a child in crisis were facing yet another move and were in the process of relinquishing our vocational stability plan for the future and belonging to a particular community and place with my sense of identity and belonging laid so vulnerably bare my stress behaviors were triggering off the charts i went about seeking to establish my significance and secure my place in this organizational community by proving what a great job i could do only my heroic efforts had more the effect of a bull in a china shop what others intended as gentle critique came across to me as goading rejection what i intended to be interactive life giving facilitation came across to them as rigid and domineering though my words invited creative response my demeanor shut it down i have learned the significance of taking the time to notice these reactions within myself and prayerfully identify their deeper causes as humans the state of our soul inevitably affects the quality of our leadership this truth goes far beyond simply addressing the need to guard our souls from sin and to nurture love for god in our own lives the importance of which always merits emphasis it points us to the significance of recognizing and addressing our own deepest needs in an ongoing manner just as our need for food sleep and oxygen is ongoing so are our needs for love acceptance belonging and significance where these have been damaged through past relationships or deprived through current circumstances we will be vulnerable certain situations or interactions will act like triggers bumping against our tender areas and provoking unexpected reactions which usually are our built in mechanisms for self protection need meeting and situation management the problem is that these coping mechanisms are rarely experienced by others as loving let alone consistent with good leadership so we are human and our humanity affects our leadership what can be done about it i have learned the significance of taking the time to notice these reactions within myself and prayerfully identify their deeper causes beyond confession these moments of deepening self awareness move me to bring my whole self into more intimate relationship with god i come as a little child asking him to kiss the parts that hurt and assure the parts that are scared until i am once again securely at rest in a world over which he lovingly reigns only then am i a whole enough person to safely lead others questions for reflection what reactive tendencies do you notice in yourself how do you behave when under stress you may want to ask your spouse children or teammates to help you identify these in what sort of situations or interactions are these behaviors likely to come out what do you notice as a common factor as you consider this common factor ask the holy spirit to help you see the fears insecurities or unmet needs that may be driving your reactions what might these be what could be a more godly and helpful approach to addressing your areas of vulnerability share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like loading childlikeness deepest needs leadership prayer relationships safe leadership self awareness spiritual formation advent kingdom coming spiritual formation come lord jesus december 24 2020 tiffany clark 1 comment i m not sure if i am ready for christmas this year 2020 has overindulged me with food for advent the period of preparation leading up to christmas never have i found it so natural to enter into this season of watching for god to come as in the midst of this year s political turmoil social unrest cataclysmic weather and global loss of stability community and life a weary world cries out for a savior whether under the guise of a vaccine a candidate a policy or a donation and my soul joins the cry hosanna o save us but my longing is tempered by the sobering thought that we may not be ready to receive what we ask for if god showed up on earth today would we welcome his coming any better than those who failed to receive him 2020 years ago would we be willing to have our lifestyles our our social structures and our economic interests overturned by his radically different ways am i ready and willing to turn over my personal plans my property my time my relationships and my body to his way of doing things such radical relinquishment of control rattles what little sense of security i have left at the end of this destabilizing year it forces the question who do i really want to be in charge whose rule would i truly welcome in my life and my world as our family has worked our way through advent readings from the prophets and gospels our christmas warm fuzzies have been replaced with sober self reflection their message repeats god does not show up on human terms if we invoke his presence in our world we need to understand what it is we are asking for we are inviting the refiner s fire to burn away our dross i am asking the judge who sees my hidden agendas and petty indulgences to lay them bare this is the process through which he makes all things new he exposes what is wrong and then catches it up in his merciful arms to change it until it is right am i ready to receive what i am asking for and yet can i afford not to ask for it as i sing o come o come emmanuel images flash through my mind of covid patients fighting a losing battle for breath and landscapes devastated by wind fire and flood i see communities divided by mistrust and anger individuals torn apart by mental illness and addiction and families separated by conflict war politics quarantine and death we have done our best to rule the world under our own steam and 2020 has shown us how well that goes i identify with the rich young ruler wanting to receive the gift of god s kingdom and yet vacillating on the threshold of what it will cost me i m not sure i am ready for christmas this year but i am sure that i can trust the one whose coming i anticipate and hasten his arm is strong to save and gentle to restore his ways are not like ours and for that i am increasingly grateful so yes come lord jesus share this share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like loading advent depression kingdom of god leadership peace politics power reconciliation rulers of earth savior spiritual formation surrender abuse leadership spiritual formation it doesn t have to be this way sex scandals and what our leaders need october 9 2020 tiffany clark 11 comments i need this reading the recent investigation on claims of ravi zacharias s sexual misconduct i was caught by the statement multiple women reported hearing from him having worked with christian leaders around the world i hear more in those words than a pick up line i hear the plea of men and women caught up in the isolation of their ministry success and feeling desperately in need in need of what their admirers may wonder beyond fame fortune and following these leaders evidence amazing riches in god s wisdom and power if that isn t enough to satisfy then what is yet so many leaders end up enmeshed in immorality and scandal that news of it is hardly more surprising than that of another dip in the stock market or sighting of a hurricane unsurprising yet damaging those whose lives they influenced are left to grapple with doubts over what was real and what was not henri nouwen who served in the l arche communities founded by now disgraced jean vanier identified the conditional nature of the world s love as a source of enslavement particularly to those in its limelight gifted leaders who perform well are elevated to hero status with the caveat that they consistently meet and exceed expectations these ifs enslave me since it is impossible to respond adequately to all of them it is a world that fosters addictions because what it offers cannot satisfy the deepest craving of my heart ours has become a culture in which leaders are either sanctified or vilified with very little room for being human we are familiar with the idea that power corrupts but we fail to recognize how our image of leaders undermines their capacity to live as beloved children of god made of weak flesh and in need of ongoing nurture this in no way excuses their indecent behavior or abuse of power nor does it downplay the devastation of broken lives and disillusioned communities left in their wake but there are multiple forces at play driving good leaders to end up in bad places to the extent we can recognize and work to change these we can alter the increasingly familiar narrative of fallen leaders and discredited ministries without constantly cultivating the childlike intimacy with god that usually defined david leaders will fall prey to a tempting barrage of unmet needs and entitled excuses sex scandals among leaders are as old as the bible david s abusive treatment of bathsheba fits the pattern perpetuated among leaders from seattle to sri lanka taken at face value his public statement of confession psalm 51 reveals a heart that did not intend for things to end up where they did but the toxic mix of unquestioned authority and pedestalized isolation led this otherwise godly leader to seek his next high in the wrong place for the many like him fanfare as addictive as a like button can combine with a dizzying height of social expectation to create a lifestyle fueled by a perpetual adrenaline rush add to that long work hours constant travel and the pressure to perform and it is no surprise that the davids of our time suffer from a deep inner hunger their souls are starving and the quickest bite they can grab is a shoddy stand in for true intimacy not to mention one of the very lambs they have devoted themselves to shepherding leaders are responsible to safeguard their flocks their families and their souls without constantly cultivating the childlike intimacy with god that usually defined david leaders will fall prey to a tempting barrage of unmet needs and entitled excuses thomas à kempis ...
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