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and his wife contributed to now they are both dead i can be honest and admit that my sister and i were victims of their child abuse all the way through high school i don t want to go into it it doesn t serve a purpose but i share this detail about my life because while i can appreciate who he ended up as someone with whom i was friendly and cared for it doesn t erase the bitterness of my childhood and teen years it doesn t make up for the probably tens of thousands of dollars i ve spent on therapy and medications for depression and anxiety ever since it doesn t make up for the loss of the absolute sun in my life that my dad was for me when i was very young they say you shouldn t speak ill of the dead and i have no interest in laying bare my grievances but i keep remembering i m conflicted even as i feel sad and miss him and that s really ok i can t put on rose colored glasses and forget how his neglect and his condoning her abuse made life hell but humans are complex aren t they and i can focus on his misdeeds and continue to be miserable or i can forgive him for his failings as a father and just be glad for the good years for me up to age 10 and the 2010s onward that s probably the healthy way to approach it and for all i know i may not have been a picnic for some of those years but i wasn t the adult in that situation anyway so many people have expressed their condolences and i am grateful for them he lived kind of an amazing life he was so talented in art electronics medicine gardening music and he was brilliant and well beloved as a doctor so people s sympathy is warranted and appreciated because a life like his should be remembered even celebrated my sister wrote a beautiful eulogy for him that had to have moved everyone who heard it when people ask me how i m doing i say i m ok and i mean it i m sad as i mentioned but i m not beset with grief to the point that i m incapacitated i believe if he s not in heaven yet he s heaven bound god says what we forgive on earth is forgiven in heaven and i can say with a true full heart i forgive him people don t deserve forgiveness but when we give it we make loose the chains on our own hearts and it allows us to be lighter and happier and that s what i really want to be peaceful and unburdened from pains from the past i have a few mementos from him photos and such and they fill me with warmth when i look at him in his heyday here s a photo of him from 1968 with his hair done up in flowers most likely by his sisters he looks so cute doesn t he share this email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on x opens in new window x share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest like loading posted in family tagged dad family forgiveness 2 replies dispatch from edinburgh 5 afternoon tea posted on august 5 2025 by jc reilly reply the georgian restaurant at harrods in the u k afternoon tea don t call it high tea has been elevated to an art form it is not merely drinking a pot of tea and eating some cakes but rather enjoying an experience of delicacies accompanied by tea and served on beautiful china with bright shimmering silverwear loose tea wades in a silver teapot just waiting to be poured through a silver sieve into a cup a bowl of sugar cubes white and brown is overflowing and on the side are tiny silver tongs with which to retrieve and drop sugar into the teacup then comes a tier of plates laden with sweets and sandwiches and scones just waiting for clotted cream and jam one leaves afternoon tea stuffed to the gills but happy and satisfied and feeling a little like a lady of the ton in a regency novel this summer i partook of afternoon tea three times for lunch once at the georgian restaurant at harrods in london it took me forever to find the place in the department store that store is labyrinthine sparkling with crystal and soft light once at the willow tea rooms with a view of edinburgh castle and once at prestonfield house also in edinburgh harrods was the most elaborate of the three with an individually assigned waiter who took care of my every need his name was dennis and he was born in australia but raised in italy with every delivery of treats all vegan dennis explained what each item was and encouraged me to try everything the tea he suggested was harrods own special blend a black tea combination of sri lankan assam and darjeeling with hints of spice like star anise combined with milk and sugar the tea was smooth and bright and i drank two huge pots of it i took a bite out of the grape and carrot sandwich before i remembered to take a photo oopsie the first course was the finger sandwiches which included a grape and carrot sandwich a cucumber sandwich a button mushroom savory praline sandwich and a cheese and caramelized onion tart my favorite will always be the cucumber and cream cheese but the nutty earthy taste of the button mushroom sandwich was very good as well dennis offered me a second plate of sandwiches minus the tart i could have gotten another for 5 but i didn t want it that bad which i heartily enjoyed following that ca me the plain and fruit sultanas or currents not sure which scones with madagascan vanilla oat chantilly vegan clotted cream and a selection of four jams apricot strawberry blackberry and cherry each in little ramekins with a silver spoon i worked my way through the jams a different flavor for each bite though the strawberry was particularly fine apparently i did not eat enough of the blackberry because dennis seemed disappointed that there was so much of the jam left desserts and scones next came four sweet treats a chocolate calisson which was a chocolate cake with chocolate cream mousse and a yuzu center which is a kind of hot pepper an english strawberry and elderflower tart a matcha sphere which had matcha mousse and cake with a bit of strawberry sauce and real gold leaf and an apricot and thyme baba a kind of soaked cake with white chocolate of course things are brought out very slowly so that presentation is front and center at harrods one is overwhelmed with service and luxury and given time to appreciate each bite when i left harrods i was quite full and delighted i only wished i had had someone with me to enjoy the meal with willow tea rooms i tried the willow tea rooms across from the castle on the recommendation of my students who went there to satisfy one of their cultural experience assignments for me all four of the young ladies gushed over the presentation and the food and i thought i would give it a try too it was about a quarter of the price of harrods but the tablecloths were a pristine white and service was nice enough the large room accommodated many tables but mine was tucked in a corner across from a lady eating a bowl of soup and a cheese scone and reading something heavy and russian maybe anna karenina the design of the chairs was art deco with black backs much taller than the person sitting in the chairs and the logo printed on the napkins was like an art deco window with a rose on it and dark black lines mimicking the chairbacks i chose the classic afternoon tea which came with four dainty sandwiches egg mayo otherwise known as egg salad scottish salmon and cream cheese i don t think i ll ever like cold salmon cucumber and cream cheese again my favorite and ham and butter i did not eat the ham these arrived on a tier with a fruit scone with raspberry jam and clotted cream and a nice slice of carrot cake with a vanilla buttercream frosting i was not particularly adventurous with the tea i just enjoyed a pot of peppermint which was lighter on a hot day than a typical black tea would have been the carrot cake was really the star of the show while not as good as the kind i make it had a lovely spicy taste replete with carrots and the sponge was soft but firm a sleepy heilan coo view of prestonfield house from the gardens the final afternoon tea room i discovered by accident one of my facebook peeps mentioned they were in edinburgh and had taken pictures of the tier of treats and i was immediately drawn to it and the background of the room she told me about prestonfield house and i made my reservation for the last friday before i left i arrived about half an hour early so i wandered the beautiful grounds on the lee side of arthur s seat the extinct volcano in the east side of edinburgh while i waited the current prestonfield house dates from the 1600s but apparently way back in the 14th century it was an abbey on the grounds live heilan coos a peacock in a tree and a rather scraggly black cat whom the major domo told me was a bit of a hellion the cat seemed perfectly nice to me but as i was calling to it the house s flower arranger also called to it and the cat demonstrating utter disdain for me zipped over to the flower arranger i don t think that qualifies as hellion status but it certainly betrays a bit of poor decision making as i would have been happy to love on him as for the afternoon tea how could it be anything but lovely the room where i was led bore heavy red and ochre damask wallpaper and velvet curtains and paintings on the wall of previous owners of the house plus two big bouquets of purple hydrangeas in the center of the room every table sparkled with multiple forks and knives and more glasses than one person would actually need to drink with prestonfield house prides itself on its exceptional service and its service was indeed out of this world not only did they seat me at a wonderful table though to be fair all of them looked nice with comfy bench seating one of the servers actually put my napkin on my lap as she took my tea order i had thought about getting the evening chai but then i noticed something called black fig sencha with aromas of forest fruits and fig it was a green tea or perhaps a white tea which smelled like christmas its delicate flavor was a little on the weak side for my taste but it was plenty good with sugar in it a cool spach the water bearer came out next and poured a glass of sparkling water into my water glass and left the bottle so i had both water and tea to drink then a third server brought out an espresso cup full of gazpacho for an amuse bouche and believe me my bouche was suitably amused to be drinking a cold tomato salsa i sipped it slowly it was very good but had to smile when this goth girl at another table got hers she took one sip wore a look on her face that was half horror and half disgust and she put her espresso cup down with a thump i did not see her girlfriend s expression and wondered if it had been the same prestonfield tower o treats after a while the tower of treats came out first was a plate of savory crackers one with english pea mint and marigold interesting but not my favorite one with cream cheese and tomato on a little oat cake and the third a whipped applewood cheese on cranberry toast with a bit of apricot the cheese part was whipped but didn t taste very cheddary all were tiny no bigger than half a thumb but they were pleasant to eat on the bottom tier were four sandwiches avocado and tomato corned jackfruit and pineapple chutney i didn t really taste the pineapple but the jackfruit was interesting egg with caesar mayonnaise and a roasted red pepper and hummus on half a roll prestonfield desserts but wait there s more a fruit scone and a butter scone with raspberry jam and clotted cream awaited me both were dusted with turbinado sugar and the clotted cream was almost the consistency of butter but by then i was starting to feel full having drunk a wine bottle full of sparkling water plus two silver pots of tea plus eating the sandwiches and savories how i wondered could i possibly eat anything else too much chocolate for me it rather overpowered the rose i was afraid that asking for a to go box would be déclassé but when i asked for a box the server didn t bat an eye i did try two of the desserts a raspberry and dark chocolate rose cake which was almost too chocolatey and an apricot and pistachio macaron that left a coconut pineapple and ginger mousse sphere and a strawberry tart with black pepper but i packed up the scones and the clotted cream and the jam and the two desserts i couldn t finish once i was done eating the manager came by to tell me the history of prestonfield house and he also remarked on the box of sweets i was taking home i told him i couldn t possibly eat another bite but everything was divine he looked as pleased with this remark as if he had created the feast himself and everyone else i passed as i made my way to the front of the hotel was charming and pleasant and made me feel like i was someone famous and important the way they fell over themselves to wish me well of the three afternoon teas i think i liked prestonfield house the best it was elegant and cozy harrods was perhaps a little finer on the food but i just felt more comfortable at prestonfield house for one thing i wasn t ragged and sweating like i had been when i was walking in london and suffering a bum foot instead i had taken an uber to prestonfield house and i was perfectly put together though still with a bum foot the willow tea rooms was nice but not in the same class as harrods or prestonfield house it was more of your everyday afternoon tea whereas the other two promise special occasions i think prestonfield house felt like i could belong there where the georgian at harrods seemed more like a place you would go to be seen the only thing that would have made all three of these afternoon teas better would have been if you were there with me maybe next time entrance into prestonfield house a brown heilan coo placidly getting rained on teapot at prestonfield house strawberry pepper tart prestonfield sandwiches with the pineapple jackfruit one on the right another view of the rhubarb room so many glasses pineapple coconut ginger mousse ball pistachio macaron the peacock in a tree harrods matcha ball harrods apricot thyme tart harrods chandelier harrods chocolate mousse cake a view of edinburgh castle from willow tea rooms with an ugly lamp post with a seagull on it directly in front savory crackers at prestonfield house share this email a link to a friend opens in new window email share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on x opens in new window x share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest like loading posted in writing in general tagged afternoon tea dessert edinburgh edinburgh castle harrods helian coo london peacock prestonfield house scotland tea leave a reply dispatch from edinburgh 4 islay and the whisky coast posted on july 14 2025 by jc reilly reply three years ago i went on a speyside whisky tour it was the first time i had ever tasted whisky and i was a total n00b about it but after the tour i realized that i liked whisky and could see drinking it 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