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is a buck it was then that hymie seeking to nurture and grow his herd purchased a massive hereford bull from a neighboring ranch the rancher who sold the bull warned hymie that the bovine suffered from a restless spirit and could not be contained by mere wire fences the bull s wildness seemed almost elemental he broke through barbed wire as if it didn t exist suggesting desperation and freedom to roam hymie named the bovine little moses as december descended into winter a blue texas norther swept across the prarie enveloping it in a foot of snow it was two days before hymie s ranch hands could reach the cattle and when they finally did they found the herd had vanished into the vastness leaving only a gaping break in the fence little moses with his insatiable desire to roam had led the others away into the boundless prairie worry filled the air as the cowboys scoured the land for trails only to lose their way in the rugged hills frantic hymie called upon the local sheriff jd ramses to put out an alert for the missing cattle a flyer caricaturing a group of smiling cows decorated every telephone pole and storefront in town the sheriff alerted law enforcement in the surrounding counties the poster added a comic touch in desperate times reports trickled in from west texas of a large number of cattle seen crossing route 66 a week ago hymie and his men doggedly pursued the herd picking up cow tracks outside of lubbock thirty nine days had passed and the exhausted cowboys were ready to return home on the fortieth day they stumbled upon their herd resting against the edge of palo duro canyon all seemed accounted for save for their leader little moses as twilight descended one of the men caught sight of a ghost emerging from the canyon a snow white bull trembling stumbling yet proud little moses had returned his dark coat transformed into a glaring white his eyes a startling blue that shifted like lightning in a storm the bull had witnessed a biblical apparition possibly a burning tumbleweed or a flame engulfed mesquite tree the beast settled near the campfire surrounded by his loyal herd which gathered to pay homage as if sensing the moment s gravity hymie offered him bread and a few sips of kosher wine as a final kindness little moses then lay down next to the campfire accepting the warmth and the final moment he drew his last breath exhaling a vapor cloud that floated upward into the chilled night the sky boomed with thunder a sudden crack of lightning that could have startled any common cattle yet no one moved instead they stood rapt in attention staring upward as a celestial sound of trumpets pierced the night from somewhere above two heavenly holstein angel cows graced with beautiful white wings descended each adorned with a golden trumpet in their right hoove the angelic cows flanked little moses and in a transcendent moment the trio ascended into the heavens a journey not just for the bull but for every living soul that had wandered alongside him the cowboys were left gobsmacked the group of men in stunned silence sat by the campfire finding solace in their whiskey rolled cigarettes and hardtack dialogue sputtered and finally ended no one could explain the miraculous ascending of little moses hymie being the most religious of the bunch said if god takes us sinful cowboys to heaven why not a cow as dawn painted the sky anew the cowboys awoke to find a snow white bull calf standing proud among the cows fiery blue eyes that sparked with the promise of a bovineious legacy this new leader born from the mystique of the canyon would guide the way back to the flying menorah a symbol of continuity in a world that had brushed against the divine share this share on x opens in new window x share on bluesky opens in new window bluesky share on mastodon opens in new window mastodon share on nextdoor opens in new window nextdoor share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on telegram opens in new window telegram share on whatsapp opens in new window whatsapp share on threads opens in new window threads share on facebook opens in new window facebook print opens in new window print share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like this like loading armageddon is upon us the last days of texas featured phil strawn 14 comments i am not a snow person nor an ice one cold weather is fine for a while but then i want to be bathed in the warmth of the sun brian wilson but then in texas the sun s warmth means cooking alive in 100 plus degree heat so living in texas is for tough folks alas the winter snow and ice armageddon is about to return in two days the last one was in 2021 and crippled the state for a week momo and i stopped by our heb for a few items this afternoon and that was a mistake the place was like a zombie apocalypse folks fighting and snarling over the last loaf of bread fists flying in the aisles over hamburger helper and riots at the frozen pizza case it was all entertaining watching my fellow texans act like well crazed texans we don t do well when bad winter weather is approaching and even worse once it arrives my truck has all wheel drive so i m good with the snow but not the ice storms then we stay in and watch 1883 or 1923 again momo is already fretting about missing church on sunday because of the storm i told her that god will understand after all he s the one who created this lousy weather and is sending it our way i stocked up on extra bird seed and peanuts for the crows blue jays and now the pesky squirrel has returned and found the relocated bird feeders so it s back to war with the little nut breath the racoons possum and skunk are still visiting nightly enjoying their cafeteria of dog food and sliced apples my backyard is the equivalent of luby s for critters now a coyote has been coming around but i have roadrunners on the property so we ll see how that plays out i ll post some pictures of the end of texas as we know it if and when it happens if we survive share this share on x opens in new window x share on bluesky opens in new window bluesky share on mastodon opens in new window mastodon share on nextdoor opens in new window nextdoor share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on telegram opens in new window telegram share on whatsapp opens in new window whatsapp share on threads opens in new window threads share on facebook opens in new window facebook print opens in new window print share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like this like loading featured ask a texan minneapolis ain t lake wobegon featured phil strawn 9 comments sometimes questionable and often brilliant advice for folks that want to be a texan but can t afford to get here the texan this texan received a dispatch from a mr hardy wood guthrie of okemah oklahoma written on the back of a walmart sales receipt it seems his wife little white dove is dead set on going to minneapolis to join in all the fun the protestors are having mr guthrie mr texan please excuse my bad manners for writing on a walmart receipt just so you know my wife bought all that useless stuff except for the chili pork rinds which are my favorite snack and of course the carton of marlborough s and the natural light beer little white dove my cherokee indian wife has lost her arrows she s watching the news and seeing all these protesters up in minneapolis playing in the snow throwing snowballs and making snow angels with the help of those nice ice boys now they ve taken over target stores and are getting all that free stuff plus 200 a day for protesting she s real fond of that pioneer woman stuff and is hoping to get a new set of cookware and a bathrobe for free i told her it s about to get really serious because the army boys are coming to town but she got really smartie pants with me and said i ll do what i want to this land is your land this land is my land she said not to worry she has a friend named alice and she has a restaurant where she can get anything she wants over in edina where all the rich folks live she is a big fan of that schmuck garrison keillor mister handsy man that lives over in lake wobegon and is going to look him up and have a lutefisk sandwich with him she thinks it s all a big party sort of like woodstock on ice and won t listen to me i m so frazzled i m thinking about writing a protest song about all this mess got any advice for me little white dove the texan well mr guthrie sounds like little white dove needs a visit from the medicine man i have a little experience with protest and such as i went to the university of texas in austin with all those hippie folks and most of them are still there riding around on their handicap scooters and smacking visitors with their walking canes back then they weren t collecting a paycheck for protesting rioting and burning things up they got hopped up on those funny cigarettes and just did it for the fun of it not trying to name drop here but i also spent some time with old bob dylan and his squeeze joan b i think bob is a poet and didn t know it and you can tell little white dove to be careful because after all the times they are a changing i m sending her a nice bouquet of big sunflowers to stick in the barrels of those army boys guns a garrison keillor vhs tape of prairie home companion and you a box of cherry bombs to relieve your anxiety i ll be watching the news to see how she does share this share on x opens in new window x share on bluesky opens in new window bluesky share on mastodon opens in new window mastodon share on nextdoor opens in new window nextdoor share on tumblr opens in new window tumblr share on reddit opens in new window reddit share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin share on telegram opens in new window telegram share on whatsapp opens in new window whatsapp share on threads opens in new window threads share on facebook opens in new window facebook print opens in new window print share on pinterest opens in new window pinterest email a link to a friend opens in new window email like this like loading wills journey featured phil strawn 15 comments my grandfather john henry strawn was a dichos a storyteller a bearer of folklore and a master weaver of tales who could grip the heart of any listener by the time i came to appreciate his art he had become an old man his form hunched and weary from years of living yet his spirit gave his narratives power i would sit cross legged on the floor close beside his rocking chair absorbed in the stories that spilled from his lips losing myself in the world he painted with words ever so often he would pause lift his fiddle from its case next to the rocker and play a few licks to accentuate his tales folks like him didn t bother to write they told their stories around a campfire or in front of a fireplace on a cold winter day those were the days i cherished most when he told me this story he was in his last days suffering from cancer caused by getting gassed in world war 1 he passed away a month or so later but he did manage to leave me with some of the best parts of his life to write about a small group of cowhands is sitting on the porch of a bunkhouse on a night without a breeze the coal oil lamp was placed out in the front dirt yard of the shack to draw the bugs away the ranch they worked was west of mineral wells texas way out yonder in the low mountains of the palo pinto rough country the white haired visitor sitting to rufus left had been quiet throughout del s story staring at his boots and showing no emotion so rufus trying to be hospitable asked him if he had something to say the way he wore his hat all cockeyed and sweat stained was sad he was in dirty clothes worn out boots and no woman miserable del had just finished his story about fighting a gang of mexican outlaws down on the rio and he wasn t sure he wanted to hear about anything this old codger had to say but he is a guest so he gets to speak the visitor opened a pearl drank it all in one swig gathered himself for a minute and said my name s william my friends call me will i grew up around kennedale and fought in the great war back in 1917 over there in france i ain t never told anyone about this but i m getting old and the angels are coming to visit me in my dreams at night so i figure it s about time to let this out a few of the men moved closer to the visitor i joined up in the army over in fort worth in 1917 then i got sent to kansas for training and was then shipped over to france on a boat when i got there my captain knowing i was from texas put me in charge of the caissons and the mules that pulled them he figured if i was from texas i was a cowboy i never told him differently at least i was stationed back from the worst of the fighting taking care of the stock i was okay with that it saved my sorry ass i got pretty fond of those mules and it hurt me a lot when one of them got killed i always fed them more than needed they were happy critters i liked my job i loved being alive one cold miserable muddy morning these three german boys come walking across the battlefield holding a white hanky they were giving up some of the boys wanted to shoot them but our captain said that wouldn t be right to kill an unarmed man captain was funny that way he was a preacher back in oklahoma so he tried to live by the word even in war those kraut boys were pitiful no coats dirty and scared they were a mess we fed them some grub and gave each a blanket and a tin of hot coffee with a bit of brandy they were grateful one boy sobbed a bit and then in pretty good english thanked us for not killing them his name was frank i liked that young fella after a week with us the men didn t bother watching them anymore those boys helped with chores and even did kp for us they were nice boys who didn t want any part of this war but like us they were doing their duty they were our prisoners but we treated them like they were one of us i asked frank if he wanted to help me with the stock and he was happy to oblige he said that back in bavaria his family raised farm horses for a living so he knew horses i was glad to have him help i never imagined i would become friends with a german soldier in a damned old war but that s what happened frank and i became best of buddies we exchanged addresses and such so when the war was over we could keep in touch after a while he and the other two got moved to a town in france and turned back over to the germans when the war was over i didn t know if i would ever hear from him but i hoped i would i never had many friends except for a couple of dogs and my horse a year after i got home to waco my momma brought me a letter from germany frank in his best english wrote to me about ...
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