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Text of the page (random words):
predictably approach hugs more warily once a bear s hug has got you it is apt to be for keeps harold macmillan lyndon baines johnson thought much the same thing hug your friends tight but your enemies tighter hug them so tight they can t wriggle clearly some hugs come with health warnings but whether spiritual or unexplained charisma on tap they can be a force to be reckoned with posted by mike keyton at 07 52 3 comments labels america baffled thoughts saturday 18 july 2026 biggus dickus the penis has dominated man s thinking for millennia thousands of small bronze amulets or carvings have been found of a winged phallus the fascinus a minor roman deity used to ward off the evil eye one presumes they were effective then there is the secret figurine peculiar to anglo romano britain found all over england these were pocket sized figurines depicting a small man in a pointed hood when unlocked the outer coat opens to reveal that the entirety of the body is a penis with legs i swear if i was a young and thrusting entrepreneur i d be manufacturing thousands of these little beauties if you ask me the market s wide open even landscape is affected by the noble penis the famous cerne abbas giant with his impressive appendage was once a resting place for young woman seeking a husband in irish myth and legend glens and valleys were caused not by glaciation but the far more satisfactory story of ancient giants gouging the earth with their dangling appendages the gaelic name for one cairngorm mountain is bod an deamhain or penis of the demon it was changed to demon s peak when the easily offended victoria came to visit it similarly the old man of hoy has proved a more acceptable name than its gaelic original in fact the last great manifestation of the penis is to be found in the noble codpiece exemplified by that of henry viii since then it seems to have withered away in a manner of speaking that is until the recent furore surrounding the bayeaux tapestry and boy has it excited academics in case you need to know and can t afford the 33 to see the actual thing there are 626 human figures 190 horses 35 dogs 37 trees 32 ships 33 buildings and 93 penises on display four of them are attached to men others detect five or even six men wih them though one of those is only a pair of testicles the penis itself obscured by an axe handle talk about excitable dons as in most things there is a serious point to be made and these dedicated and sharp sighted men go about it they note that every male figure on the large middle panels display nothing but their modesty the only penises shown here are equine 88 of them and used to denote status king harold rides a well endowed stallion william the ultimate victor rides a more impressively endowed stallion his half brother bishop odo rides a modestly endowed stallion more befitting to a man of god none of the 35 dogs are endowed which seems a shame so where are all the well endowed men they are to be found in the smaller top and lower panels and offer a sly commentary to the main events or the official version in the middle they are believed to be based on those aesop s fables denoting sexual trickery and deceit and provide a nudge nudge wink wink aside to a particular event shown in the main panels unfortunately your 33 entry fee is based on a conveyor belt system allowing each visitor a bare 40 minutes so many penises so little time posted by mike keyton at 08 54 no comments labels baffled thoughts clay cross hi history thursday 9 july 2026 girls shoes my first holy communion i remember as a bit of a disaster hospitalisation meant i missed much of the painstaking preparation and what little i had was rushed i just knew it was immensely important without fully appreciating why more importantly i was wearing hand me down sandals and even worse than that girls sandals one of which wouldn t buckle it was many years later when things finally fell into place in particular john 6 35 57 i am the bread of life whoever comes to me will never go hungry and who ever believes in my will never go thirsty and whoever comes to me i will never drive away for my father s will is that everyone that looks to the son and believes in him shall have eternal life and will raise them up on the last day whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and i in them this is both powerful and unambiguous even so for a long time i found it difficult to fully appreciate why priests and catholics took such risks in c16th england ruinous fines broken bones and death for the sake of holy communion if i had been gk chesterton i would have had no problem no problem at all after his reception into the catholic church chesterton went to high wycombe to be prepared by father thomas walker for his first holy communion father walker remembered the preparation as one of the happiest duties i had ever to perform it certainly did not take long to prepare him for he evidently knew as much as i could tell him nevertheless he said i was to treat him as any child whom i was teaching i went through the catechism very meticulously explained all the details to which he lent a most vigilant and unswerving attention so aware was chesterton of the immensity of the real presence on the morning of his first communion that he was covered with perspiration when he actually received our lord when i congratulated him he said i have spent the happiest hour of my life but at least to begin with he found it difficult going to holy communion his best happiness he was too much frightened of that tremendous reality on the altar i have not grown up with it and it is too much for me deep down i regret feeling none of what chesterton experienced that first time but then i have grown up with it in fairness too i suspect chesterton may have been feeling something else if he had been wearing girls shoes one of which was unbuckled posted by mike keyton at 11 54 2 comments labels baffled thoughts thursday 25 june 2026 the national botanic garden of wales a few weeks ago we visited the national botanic garden of wales to be frank on a damp and gloomy day i wasn t expecting that much but ended up wanting more and pencilling in further visits but with the proviso don t be suckered by gift aid the bio dome alone is pretty spectacular being the largest single spanned glasshouse in the world the climate within is geared to plants from the mediterranean california peru majorca and australia strangely though i found that less impressive than the 560 acres of parkland surrounding it walking through it you seamlessly entered an c18th landscape and the world of sir william paxton the estate was famous for its necklace of engineered lakes still in evidence today present day photos and 1815 paintings by thomas horner meadow land and william paxton s three acre double walled garden before the enterprising william paxton the future national botanic garden of wales had been part of the middleton estate their house middleton hall must have looked quite imposing it had for example 17 hearths as indicated by the hearth tax records of 1670 the middletons like paxton who succeeded them derived much of their wealth from the east india company and india in general it is no surprise that in the present climate of self abnegation this has to be apologised for the botanic garden website is particularly mealy mouthed going on about the horrendous injustices visited upon the innocent this despite the fact that we merely usurped previous conquerors like the mughals or equally rapacious indigenous princes and it was not entirely cost free whether in terms of the humble soldier on both sides or indeed the three middleton brothers who died on their way home from india whether we or indeed indians would now feel more comfortable if the french had beaten us to it is open to debate paxton s new middleton hall painted by the artist thomas horner there are other things that cut across the grain of modern opinion in the 1802 elections william paxton spent 15 000 in order to secure his election a total of 1107 breakfasts 36 901 dinners 6842 suppers 25 275 gallons of ale and porter 11 074 bottles of spirits 8879 bottles of porter 4064 bottles of sherry 509 bottles of cider 18 18 shillings worth of milk punch 54 worth of mulled wine and 4 521 instances of horse hire he lost the election but the electorate had a bloody good time a far superior way of doing things in my opinion blasted oak and paxton s tower in the far distance and again paxton tower can be seen on the horizon despite this princely expenditure william paxton had no trouble finding the money for his 36 foot high three sided gothic tower such follies built to be seen were then an essential feature of most grand estates this particular one built in honour of nelson killed in the battle of trafalgar originally called nelson s tower engraved tables commemorating his victory in english welsh and latin were placed on each side of the tower so much to learn a single lifespan is not enough three or four perhaps might fit the bill then as well as history i d be able to study geology a growing passion but one too late to develop and botany the latter exemplified in the final pictures below a tree covered by fungi and the attendant information that follows and one more thing to learn on buying an entry ticket you ll be asked if you want to sign up for gift aid in britain this is a way for charities to gain exemption from tax and is normally cost free to the individual ie the government reimburses the charity of any tax due on the transaction in this case however it s the individual that pays a ten percent addition to the original price if they were honest and asked for a ten percent tip from the start i know what my answer would have been there are insufficient lifespans to erase my miserly streak posted by mike keyton at 07 24 1 comment labels baffled thoughts history thursday 18 june 2026 an adventurous twelve year old boy william paxton 1744 1824 was the son of a scottish wine merchant who spent much of his childhood in london he enjoyed it so much that at the age of twelve he joined the royal navy as a captain s servant rising through the ranks to become a midshipman and ultimately an officer on a british merchant ship bound for india there he made a fateful decision he trained to become an assayer analysing minerals and ores to establish their worth his worth was recognised when he was made assay master at fort worth in bengal from where he went on to form his own company some won great fortunes in india most died in action or from tropical disease as the numerous memorial plaques in obscure country churches bear witness like many at the time he made his fortune in india and returned to britain immensely rich and determined to become a landed gentleman in 1789 he purchased middleton hall replacing it with a brand new and much grander mansion it even had water closets with water fed from a rooftop cistern fed in turn by a small reservoir built in the side of a neighbouring hill rural carmarthenshire had never seen the like paxton totally transformed the surrounding parkland a three acre double walled garden was built the double walls of stone and brick creating a milder microclimate which extended the growing season for vegetables and fruit within the garden he built a large greenhouse with underfloor heating which allowed peaches and other more exotic fruit to be grown he developed woodland and a complex necklace of lakes dams and waterfalls and when he discovered the healing properties of the water piped it into his mansion as well as building a public bathhouse outside the estate for local people people flocked to sample the healing waters to the great benefit of the immediate community the entire neighbourhood benefited from william paxton now a sir he founded a charity school at llanarthne leased land for the building of the bethlehem baptist chapel and subscribed the then substantial sum of 1000 for a canal as well as improving kidwelly harbour his greatest contribution to the area was perhaps the regeneration of the then run down town of tenby recognising the growing demand for the sea side holiday when much of europe was being trampled by the napoleonic wars paxton developed a prestigious bathhouse in tenby which attracted a steady influx of visitors he built lodging houses for the new tourists provided fresh drinking water widened streets built new roads and a brand new theatre for the town similarly he improved the water supply for the county town of carmarthen replacing leaky wooden pipes with new iron pipes and his relevance today the middleton hall estate along with his pioneering work in agriculture and landscaping provided the basis for today s prestigious national botanical garden of wales not bad for a boy who went to sea at the age of twelve posted by mike keyton at 12 17 no comments friday 12 june 2026 every house has a story the house i was born in was the family home and had been since the early 1920s the keyton family the first and only owners until 1994 when our mother died i remember buying my first house a wimpey semi detached with not a stick of furniture but for a bed and a rocking chair the house was only five years old and i was its second owner i remember buying our second house a large redbrick edwardian semi detached it had everything in terms of position and potential but my goodness it was hard work built in 1906 it had been owned by many before us including more recently a dynasty of catholic teachers but overlaying everything was an overpowering sense of tragedy its previous occupants were a young married couple the husband a hard drinking soldier serving in northern ireland after one tour too many he committed suicide his distraught wife took to the bottle and the house fell into dirt and decay when we moved in the task at first seemed overwhelming the challenge of restoring the house to what it could be a joyous and satisfying challenge all of these things came to mind when we stayed for a night at the mansion house llanseffan and spent some time exploring its history it was originally a much smaller house owned by a reverend john morris but everything changed in 1888 when james richards bought the surrounding pantyrathro estate with a newly built mansion house at its centre james was a self made businessman and owner of royal dairies hampstead between 1832 and 1888 he amassed a fortune had a fine london residence in belsize business premises in hampstead and had even made the 1893 edition of illustrated london under the heading of cowkeeper and dairyman money is money but such a sobriquet was unlikely to see him admitted into london s high society so in 1888 he retired and devoted the rest of his life to developing his fine new estate and mansion house when he died his widow anne inherited and from that point things slowly went downhill she died in 1919 his eldest son would have inherited but for his dea...