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Text of the page (random words):
ties and if i was going to write down all our activities i would need more then a gigabyte of space online so i am not going to write it down unless its very important and special after a visit to macdonald s late that night we went back to the hotel and i just had to get some sleep after 4 days with less then 15 hours of sleep daily and none of which was longer then 2 hours in a row so i went up to my room read a few pages of the novel i got and went to sleep and we woke up on oksana s voice and knock on the door message to oksana we woke up on the first nock there was no need to come back and knock again and at breakfast i found out that my friends had stayed up having fun that night and they didn t even ask if i wanted to join them shame on you half way through the 2 nd day i just felt so down i started to think i wanted to quite aiesec looking back at those moments i feel that it was stupid but i also found out why i was thinking like that coz its so not me and i ll mention it later in this post i am going mad while i am writing this i don t know what to write and what not to its sooooooooooo much ok ok i can t write more about the events just 2 last notes 1 i was chosen as one of the most inspiring people at the conference and i and i am so honored i am sure the other 2 people who were also elected are the only ones who can understand how great it feels thanx a lot guys for choosing me i do hope i was a good influence 2 since i started my aiesec experience i have found some of my bad sides and have learned to fix them and become a better person and also it has made me change my thinking patterns it have never given me an answer to my questions or tools to change my mindset it just had putted me in an atmosphere were i actually start thinking about these kind of stuff ok i said before that on the 2 nd day i felt soooo down and stressed and wanting to give up but i know i am not like that so why did i behave like that why didn t i just adapt to the situation i have been adapting to different and really difficult things my whole life first i thought it was lack of sleep and that things turned out to be more demanding that i expected after that i thought it might be because i didn t have my medication and my adrenalin was going over the roof but after a 1 5 hour international call with a good friend who happens to be a psychiatrist linda i ll pay you back for that call by the way and sorry for keeping you home on saturday night i found out why i was not acting how i usually do its because i was actually trying to not act as i usually do i was not going with my flexible nature i was making my personality stiff as a board exactly how i have been acting when ever i have to deal with new people from the local jordanian society i am not good with dealing with them and usually that method has worked quite well but those situations never involved continues interaction for many hours in a row and it was not with people as great as those i met in aiesec so by being not me in a situation where i being the just me would have been accepted i broke myself by myself it wasn t the stress or amount of info or lack of sleep and brakes it was me and now i have learned my lesson and i will be able to use that for any future situation well i have to give my gratitude to leen and dana the other 2 team leaders in my pbox who supported me so much and gave me all the spirit up lifting that i needed and i also can t thank maale our external enough coz she offered so much help and she was so nice even though she could have given up on me and thought i was a weak team leader and of course monnica didn t stand on the side in silence she kept reminding me that she will always be there as she have been since the first day in my aiesec experience it has been a long post but i have a few last things i have to ask you 1 please spread the link to my blog coz from now on i might post details about what is happening in my pbox that s the team i am a part of at aiesec incase you don t know and i would love to get some feed back and advices on everything possible 2 if any one know ahmad my 2 nd room mate at yarmook university we were staying at room 305 please tell him to send me a sms coz i lost his number and i owe him so money or you can send me his number directly just make sure it s the ahmad who stayed in 305 and he is the one who smokes 3 we are going to work a lot aiesec and we will interact with each other a lot or at least i hope so but each and every one of the aiesec members who were in the conference was so great and open minded and sophisticated some more then others that i would really like to meet up and hang out even when we are not doing aiesec stuff so when ever there is an event or something spread the word and lets meet and i will be visiting irbid more from now one so i hope i ll be meeting my fellow aiesec members there too team leader meeting november 20 2006 posted by aiesecexperience in uncategorized add a comment hello to evry one on saturday morning the only day i sleep in i woke up at by a call from annica at about 8 40 am and it turned out that the team meeting was suppose to be from 8 30 am to 6 pm but i was under the impression that it was from 6 pm to 8 30 pm so i got dressed in a hurry and took a cab kept nagging on the driver to hurry up and got there in one peice from there that had a full schedual for us it was really informative and they guided us through the how to be a team leader stuff a few nice simulations and games made it more fun less boreing but still by about 4 pm we or at least me were getting tired and sleepy the important events 1 i got to know the other team leaders they all seemed to be quite nice 2 we had pizza for lunch 3 i found out that asier got an offer to go to another place dominican republic and seems to have his mind undecided on going or staying with us so i better put a plan to convince him to stay but on the other hand i wish him the best of luck in what ever he does and urge him to go with what he thinks is best as long as the best is staying with us lol just kidding we got a meeting to prepare for the convention in aqaba which i hope to be successful and i am sure that with our 3 lovely mcs monnic anni and oksana it will be i can t wait to meet my team and get to know them and i have already started reading some books about about how to motivate and become friendly with team members its really harder then it seems any way wish us luck and i ll keep you posted kenaz out am i in or out november 17 2006 posted by aiesecexperience in uncategorized 2 comments hey you all it has been a very long time since i last posted anything but i have been very busy so let me get you up to date well we finished our project and handed it in it wasn t as great as we expected and wanted but it was ok after that we had out interviews mine was last monday it i was so ready for it i had ideas and puchlines ready to use but something went wrong and i kind of got lost in the interview then on a peacfull afternoon while haveing a late lunch with my friends i got a phone call from monnic and you should have seen me when she told me that i got in to aiesec i was screaming of joy i got in i got in after that i started thinking more and more about the team leader possition i wasn t really planning to apply for it as my schedual is already full as it is but after a lot thinking meditating i decided to go for it i sent the application and waited then on a beautiful morning while i was takeing my morning shower to get ready to go to the university i got another call from monnic and she gave me some real hard time she kept telling me how many students applied for the leadership posstions and how it was so hard to pick only 6 students etc etc etc and all the time i was thinking oh she is just trying to let me down easly and not hurt my feelings for being rejected but then she said you were picked and i was sooooooooooo shocked i didn t know if she was kidding or trying to confuse or something but it seems that i am the new team leader for learning at the scr project hight five to me well we got much to do from this point forward we got a conference at aqaba next week before that there is a team leaders meeting and the parents meeting and the preperation for the conference meeting things might get mad from now on but on the bright side i am in i am in i was lost now i am just devastated november 3 2006 posted by aiesecexperience in uncategorized 1 comment so far dear all yesterday thursday november 2 2006 i went to irbid with the plan of going to two aiesec meetings one with oxana 11 00 am and the one with sharif 3 30 pm and after that having a small party with a lot of friends any way things did not go as planned i first decided on taking one of those small busses instead of the hijazzy bus so i got on one of them which had the word irbid on thinking that its last stop will be irbid i was wrong the bus did stop by irbid but it wasn t its last stop so when i got off the bus at its last stop i found my self in a small town more like a village but in the end i got myself on a bus back to irbid on the way i sent a sms to oxana telling her i ll be bit late and then she called back telling me that she is in amman and sharif is giving the brand meeting to her group so i said that was ok she then gave me his number and i decided to call him the moment i got of the bus but a few minutes before i got there he called me up ok ok a lot happened but the important thing that in the end i got their now after i go there the important things started first of all sharif seems to be giving the meetings in a more serious way the others in a more lecture line approach even though at the beginning i thought it was less fun and less interactive in it i quickly started to think that perhaps that is much better in this stage of our aiesec experience i know i should write xp but many different people read my blog so i can t do that any way after the meeting was over sharif introduced me to a girl in his group and asked her to give us a small presentation about aiesec and the aiesec experience so she was nice enough to do so it was not what she said that i liked because she only said what i have already heard or read it was the aura she was pulsing with while she was talking things went on and i talked a bit actually a lot with sharif i have to admit we have quite different ideas and thinking patterns but he got my respect a lot and i found out that much of what i understood about aiesec was not so right the imagine i had created about aiesec was not correct this really made me respect annica monica oxana and asier a lot more because i started thinking back about what i heard some of them say and it just hit me what they had been trying to get through to us i was born and raised in the west and i do not have the typical middle eastern mentality nor do i have the typical western mentality if i only understood the real essence of aiesec after some taking and debating with sharif so what about the others when i went to irbid i hade two doubts about aiesec 1 did i want to become an aiesec member 2 did my schedule plans and other stuff allow me to continue with aiesec when i came back i was loaded with doubts 1 do i want to continue with aiesec 2 if i would become an aiesec member would i allow it to actually change me 3 do i deserve to be a part of aiesec 4 would i be able to both take and give something from and to aiesec 5 do i understand what will happen if i become a part of aiesec etc etc etc after my talk with sharif he headed to amman and i took my self on a tour around yarmook university unfortunately not concentrating on the sites but putting all my thoughts into what i just found out i got a call at about 6 from my friends asking me where the hell i was because i was really late for the party i organized so i took a cab to the eastern neighborhood and found a party filled with fun and joy going on but not to worry it took me less then an hour to get my new state of gloominess and negative feelings spread around to every person in the party i know this has been a long post but this event didn t open my eyes on my aiesec experience but also on my whole life i have started doubting decisions actions and principles and i think its worth mentioning as much about the event ok ok for those who are still reading i got only 2 messages for 2 people i met on thursday but i don t have their emails but i hope they read this blog and if you know them please pass the message the first to tahani yarmook university i am really sorry for what i told you what you are doing is great don t go and ruin all that good work because a stupid stranger couldn t keep hi mouth shut while he was in a gloomy mood the second to sharif i can t thank you enough our conversation will not only affect my aiesec experience but also my whole life i have already started making significant changes in it and made 180 degree redirecting in a lot of stuff and for what its worth you are one of 3 people who actually changed my life while i was convinced that it was for the best aiesec brand october 31 2006 posted by aiesecexperience in the meetings add a comment after the eid vacation our exams started so it was even harder to find a time for us to meet with anni but she declared a time for this weeks meeting which is was suppose to be about the aiesec brand but it turned out to be at the same time of one of my exams so with a bit of coordination i was able to go to another group s meeting held by asier which turned out to be interesting it was different from anni s meetings but not in a bad way i can t say it was better or worse then hers but simply different they each got their own method which seems to work perfectly but perhaps they could meet up and talk about it so each could better his or her way any way back to the brand of aiesec asier first explained the meaning of brand in general in a very nice way personally i think he might have spent to much time on this part but i am sure he knew what he was doing well i don t think i should mention all the details about the meeting but to summon what i got from it the aiesec brand is an important part in the marketing activities in the organization i would simply describe it as the banner or flag the aiesecs hold up high when entering each and every battle its also the organizations united signature an after vecation party i needed that october 31 2006 posted by aiesecexperience in uncategorized 2 comments well well here we are after the eid vacation i hope you all had a lovely time and didn t worry too much about the mid term exams that started right after the vacation to the important stuff me and my vacation well i had a great time i spent it with my friends that i haven t seen in a long time we had one devastating problem after an other but we had so much fun solving them together that i don t care that i wasted my money on stup...