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god s gift god s gift sharing our lives with family and friends everywhere wednesday december 12 2012 5 already aliya will be 5 tomorrow i can t believe it 5 when did my baby girl get so big she had her 5 year check up on monday she is 42 ½ and weighed in at 42 pounds up from last year s stats of 36 and 40 pounds her birthday always tugs at my heart a little but this year it s more than ever and i m not sure why i always think about her birthmom and the amazing gift she gave aliya the gift of life when there were other options out there easier options in some opinions she chose to carry her daughter for 9 months knowing she wouldn t keep her i can t imagine going to the hospital knowing i wouldn t leave with my baby but she did our brave birthmom entered the hospital with aliya s original chosen parents gave birth held her daughter and changed her mind she decided to parent at the last minute two people left the hospital deviated and empty handed that could have been us instead we were 1 ½ hours down the highway waiting and praying for a child we didn t even know existed the only newborn picture we have of our daughter is the image in our minds that we remember seeing on the hospital website when we first were contacted by our agency about aliya looking back i wish we would have ordered her hospital pictures i close my eyes and remember seeing that tiny little pumpkin in her hospital gown there were three pictures on the website of her and if i clicked the button fast enough they scrolled by like a flip book and her arms danced in delight she was a beautiful baby with a headful of dark thick hair i remember staring at the computer screen the days that followed after we were told our birthmom changed her mind and decided to continue parenting i remember not crying but praying praying that she was safe and knowing god had an amazing plan for her life at 5 weeks our little aliya finally came home it is a day i will never forget the little girl on the hospital website was home she was mine so sitting here on the eve of her birthday i want to hold her and not let go i want to call her birthmom and thank her thank her for choosing life and for choosing us trusting us with the most precious gift i have ever been given my aliya who s name fits her perfectly god s gift posted by kelly at 3 47 pm 1 comment tuesday august 14 2012 created for care 2013 guess where i ll be spending my next birthday here posted by kelly at 8 12 pm 1 comment sunday june 17 2012 happy father s day 2012 i took the kids to portrait inovations this year for father s day pictures of course they take like 300 pictures and try to get you to buy them all i went in with the goal of spending 40 dollars well that didn t exactly happen i spent my 40 in cash and then some but come one can you blame me how cute are my kids posted by kelly at 8 57 am 2 comments sunday may 13 2012 super cute in honor of mother s day we attended our old church last night to witness some very speical friends dedicate their two sons it was great to worship next to our friends and love on them after prior to the dedication part of the service they played this video it s super cute i hope you ll check it out make sure your sound is up for it posted by kelly at 5 05 pm no comments monday april 30 2012 amazing giveaway this book looks great for a chance to win it please go here posted by kelly at 6 33 am no comments friday april 27 2012 one step forward two steps back i have been doing so well and this morning i had a major setback while in the shower this morning as though it just happened yesterday i had this flash back from when i was back in the er lying on the table staring at the ultrasound screen seeing my baby but not seeing a heartbeat just this still form the tears came rushing back and this incredible feeling of panic and loss came over me why can t i get that image out of my mind why when i am just going about my business do i close my eyes and see it even as i sit here typing hours after the fact i am instantly brought to tears uncontrollable sobs not that i would ever trade the 8 weeks i got to experience pregnancy but i wonder if it would have just been easier to have never experienced it at all i was fine before this loving my kids and was content with the way things were sure there were days of sorrow of not having a biological child but those few days of sorrow were nothing compared to what i am feeling now i am sure people are sick of my break downs by now it will be a year in june you d think i d be over this by now but i m not it s getting harder to smile and nod at people when i just want to hide under my bed and cry posted by kelly at 1 39 pm 3 comments saturday april 14 2012 love this i wonder if our teens would understand the true meaning of easter better if they watched this posted by kelly at 6 54 am no comments older posts home subscribe to posts atom about me kelly family is my life adoption is my passion christ is my savior i am mom to two beautiful kids one by marriage one by open adoption and one angel baby who is waiting for me in the arms of jesus view my complete profile my love 2011 christmas 2011 christmas 2010 mother s day 2010 christmas 2009 the woman who changed our lives forever followers looking back 2012 14 december 1 august 1 june 1 may 1 april 6 march 1 january 3 2011 20 december 1 october 2 july 1 may 1 april 1 march 4 february 5 january 5 2010 70 december 11 november 6 october 4 september 5 august 5 july 4 june 4 may 8 april 9 march 5 february 4 january 5 2009 74 december 9 november 5 october 4 september 4 august 3 july 5 june 9 may 8 april 8 march 5 february 8 january 6 2008 132 december 14 november 12 october 8 september 9 august 13 july 10 june 9 may 11 april 11 march 17 february 14 january 4 picture window theme theme images by lokibaho powered by blogger copyright notice 2008 2009 2009 2010 2010 2011 2011 2012 copyright notice all personal pictures and personal content belong to this blog owner and 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