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Text of the page (random words):
ere it s time for us to reach out it didn t take a genius to figure me out in high school let s see i was in band orchestra and choir i was drum major in the marching band not only was i in plays and musicals in school but i also performed with the local community players then there was student council scholastic quiz bowl forensics team and computer club i was so uptight i practically squeaked when i walked oh and a b was nearly the end of the world i knew i wasn t like my friends and i d known that all my life at 14 i finally found the words to say it to myself and did what i considered a very brave act i had a cassette tape recorder some of you may have to google that and every now and then i d record the following and then pretend to forget that it was on there i am gay what am i going to do about it nothing of course i never did forget to erase it it was just a stupid game stupid but somehow it got me through even if it wasn t truly brave it felt brave to me and that s all that mattered this was the early 1980s in very rural northern new york state being gay was not something you talked about with anyone except as crude locker room jokes at the expense of others sure enough i got called every imaginable name in high school and sure enough it hurt like hell but somehow i managed to hold onto hope and the knowledge that someday not too far in the future i d be able to get on with life college isn t perfect but it s a hell of a lot better than high school thanks to the incredible outpouring from breathtakingly fabulous people youtube is now packed with hundreds of stories of survival of anguish and support and love and friendship rather than dwelling on just how awful high school is there are some essential things we need you to know it gets better i know it must seem cliché now but i have to tell you looking back i could never have hoped that life would turn out this well there will be wonderful deep abiding friendships that last longer than you ve been alive so far you ll make mistakes you ll be terrified of admitting you need someone to lean on and you ll be wildly passionate about a hundred different causes you ll visit places where you ll feel truly madly deeply at home in a way that you may never be able to articulate to anyone some of your friends will become the best family you could ever imagine and some of your family will become your most ardent supporters and you ll find your own way of getting through oh and there will be love you ll fall in love and you ll get your heart broken and you ll fall in love again and along the way you ll find out how remarkable it is to love and to be loved just for being you so hold on be here for the good stuff be truly you stick around and see how much better it gets no one s promising that it won t suck along the way and no one s saying that life as an adult is a piece of cake just remember that we re out here and we are living proof that life gets so much better so to all of us tomorrow we might not be wearing purple but we need to must carry this feeling with us there is no wrong time to reach out there is no bad time to let others know you care share your struggles and triumphs be a good friend and a great example let your children catch you doing good things dream big and dare to love open your minds to a world that is better today than it was yesterday but not as great as it will be tomorrow and be there so these kids can be here to see that it gets so much better posted by ambassador at 4 33 pm 11 comment s tags acceptance beauty fabulous friends family friendship gratitude homosexuality hope joy kindness love parents perserverance survival thursday september 17 2009 sad but still marvelous we lost another bright light yesterday mary travers was a big part of my early music life we had the peter paul mommy album i m surprised we didn t wear it out i knew every song by heart all the lyrics and all the parts it wasn t until much later in life that i realized how extraordinarily well crafted these songs and arrangements were are and one of the most magical things about them is how truly effortlessly they sang these songs infused with humor yearning giddiness and pathos these songs grabbed hold of me and never let go i have a song to sing o puff the magic dragon day is done going to the zoo tomorrow but the one that has always been the best my most favorite is the one that makes me well up with tears despite never having had children of my own the marvelous toy the last verse just gets to me so today we celebrate the life of a lovely singer who touched the lives of a lot of people for several generations mary you will always be marvelous to me posted by ambassador at 8 04 am 6 comment s tags art death music performing singing sunday september 13 2009 walking soles united yesterday we held our sidewalk sale to raise funds for our no aids walk team soles united there was only a 70 chance of rain but it had been raining pretty much all the time every day for that last 10 days this had us concerned i got up and walked the dog around 6 30am and to my surprise there was actually a sunrise you know one that you could see ok so far so good we managed to set up in time for the early birds and 9am we still had decent weather we had mixed clouds and sun for the next 2 hours and then well it only started to sprinkle and then stop and then sprinkle again and around 11 20 it start seriously drizzling and we decided to pack it in we were set up under the eaves of the condo building which is further shelter by an ancient live oak tree um we weren t counting on the electricity you know the natural kind there was thunder and lightning the likes of which we ve not seen in at least 5 years here at one point the storm was overhead the flashes and booms nearly simultaneous and i thought to myself this is not the time to be carrying this metal headboard back in the house so we succeeded in packing up the last of the unsold items without getting struck by lightning a little sore and wet but alive for a rainy sunday morning during church time and one the morning of the first saints game of the season a home game no less we did ok so we are down to the last of it we ll be carousing the french quarter this friday and saturday evening twisting arms and adding to the coffers for our walk team our team is doing well this year but as in years past i have my own very personal reasons for walking having been the recipient of their services in the past i do what i can to help support the no aids task force i know many of the wonderful folks who work there and count a lot of them as friends if you can and wish to support this cause you can check out my personal pledge page here any donations you are able to give 5 10 anything is more than they had before and from me thank you anyway next sunday is the no aids walk if you are in the new orleans area and want to show your support come on down to audubon park before the kick off at 10am it s always a lot of fun and it s for an incredibly important cause posted by ambassador at 7 31 am 1 comment s tags aids fabulous friends generosity gratitude hope kindness love new orleans rain volunteers tuesday september 08 2009 of rants and racism and presidential speeches in just a short while president obama will be addresses the students of america our future while i do agree that the accompanying lesson plan was not crafted in the most well thought out manner i am having a hard time getting all the stains out of the ceiling tile from each time my head has exploded over the last week listening to the unfathomable brouhaha here in louisiana it is optional from parish to parish public schools in new orleans are all viewing the president s speech while the suburbs to which all the white flight occurred are making it optional and at the superintendents discretion some schools are offering alternative assignments and giving parents the option to have their kids not watch it what i want to know is this how long are they estimating this speech to be tops 10 minutes right after all how long are kids going to really pay attention the argument that it disrupts the curriculum for the day is specious at best it takes longer to wrangle students for a bathroom run and how much is this costing in administration and extra labor hours to provide the alternative activity and more teachers substitutes to watch the kids who are not viewing the speech and finally sorry for the soapbox moment if the righties really fear this as a piece of potential indoctrination why not let the president go through with it as originally planned at that point a righty could then step back and say see this is exactly what we were talking about he is satan hitler mussolini easter bunny killer the stupid it burns posted by ambassador at 8 40 am 5 comment s tags fearmongering new orleans sarcasm monday september 07 2009 we heard a rumor so labor day weekend is southern decadence in new orleans an event that started in 1972 as little more than a bar crawl and has now become a massive series of parties and gatherings culminating in the very popular parade sunday afternoon this of course leave monday labor day for recovery southern decadence now draws more than 100 000 folks to new orleans every year and despite hurricane katrina squashing the big events a rag tag bunch still wandered about the french quarter on sunday september 5th in their own version of the parade police tried to stop the procession understand this was less than a week after the levees had failed however one of the revelers actually produced the parade permit that had been granted by the southern decadence organizers and the parade went on unhindered last year the parade was completely thwarted by the mandatory evacuation for hurricane gustav things could have gone on most of the quarter only lost power for 2 4 hours on average alas this year we started hearing buzz about a new entry in the parade a gay marching band really what could be more fabulous of course the jokes started flying when we heard this rumor with a gay marching band of 200 members we speculated that the general and highly stereotypical for humor s sake makeup would be 9 lesbians playing bass drum 112 piccolo players 53 color guard and 26 queens fighting to be drum major ette we could not have been more wrong and all jokes aside they were sensational the group lesbian gay band association is in new orleans this weekend for their annual national conference and offered to play in the parade nearly 200 strong they had a huge brass section lots of percussion and woodwinds and to be fair only 3 drum majors 5 flags and 7 piccolo players there were several lesbians playing drums this is paloma one of the grand marshall s for 2008 and 2009 she and her co marshall tittie toulouse reigned again this year after not having the chance to fulfill their duties last year paloma is so sweet photographs really well and can walk in killer shoes but let s just say that lipsynching is not her strong suit it was a wonderful parade and despite some very heavy downpours the timing for the parade was perfect there is a lot about southern decadence that gets less than flattering press so the beau and i were both a little misty eyed with pride when the band came by at a time when horrible things are being said about gays and lesbians here and around the world it was so very important to see them just people making music making other people happy is there a better gift posted by ambassador at 12 32 pm 6 comment s tags gay gay gay gay gay music wanting something there are many songs that move me spirituals arias folk tunes soaring broadway ballads music of all genres some of them appeal to me as a performer how i yearn to to sing certain works in the context of their original setting be it a requiem mass opera or stage show to have that connection for just a moment with the audience so tenuous and infinite all at the same time and draw them in make them feel and leave them changed somehow other works move me in a different way the songs that i want need to listen to many of them are well out of my range and not anything that i could ever attempt to perform some of them are what i turn to when i need to cry or laugh but there are those few songs that i need songs that from the first moment you hear them you think to yourself ah now if someone some day would sing that to me i learned this the hard way in college one of the grad students a friend of mine was to perform an aria that was new to him at a group recital larry asked if he could use me to focus on for his performance knowing how seeing a friendly face in the audience would help calm him i agreed not knowing it was una furtiva lagrimar from donizetti s l elisir d amour i melted and from that day forward i have pined to hear someone anyone sing it to me again that way so completely sublime and now for monday music here s the more contemporary song that holds that place no one has ever sung this to me and i don t know that i would be the same again if they did aaron lazar and katie clarke performing love to me from adam guettel s the light in the piazza posted by ambassador at 12 01 am 2 comment s tags art music monday performing sunday september 06 2009 techno wow i saw this online months ago and saved it intending to write some insightful post about technology outpacing humanity s ability to understand utilize and cope with it instead i think you ought to just watch this and marvel at the shear brilliance un freaking believable posted by ambassador at 1 24 am 2 comment s tags technology is smarter than i am saturday september 05 2009 sunrise and spiderwebs click on for some incredible detail posted by ambassador at 10 00 am 3 comment s tags photography older posts subscribe to posts atom ranting rambling in new orleans ambassador doing what i can to keep new orleans alive and in the minds of those who love it but can t always be here view 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