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life is like that i m just trying to be honest about me life is like that i m just trying to be honest search objectives 01 kamis jan 2015 posted by adityo ananta in idle talk komentar dinonaktifkan pada objectives making this list is not something i usually do anyway as requested healthier lifestyle routine exercises twice a week seems like a reasonable target be more positive and less stressed about trivial stuffs nothing can be done for the reasons or the triggers but the reactions are something that should be managed well that should be enough can t really promises about other stuffs for now a fool s errand 16 sabtu nov 2013 posted by adityo ananta in idle talk tinggalkan komentar distractions are short lived what s left is just a receding excitement and unnoticeable background noise how many times does it takes for one to realized an errand is indeed a foolish one 946684800 30 minggu jun 2013 posted by adityo ananta in idle talk personal thought tinggalkan komentar its probably silly to feel obligated to write something at this day oh well no harm in doing it anyway i can t help but to think of those drafts including the deleted ones which i don t have any intention to published them those drafts are the silent persona for things i can t just throw away one should looks forward but instead we look down pretending to be content about the present because that is what everyone else does isn t it i myself always find it hard to enjoying something that most people think is fun but society is a cruel dictator that ordered us to smile and laugh at times to maintaining peace one should not looks back but in truth we never stop putting things in the bottomless drawer and carefully keep the lock to be always in reach once upon a time there is this door of possibility one of many but this one special it should be because i keep find myself in front of it i used to think that i have the key for that door now i m not sure anymore it s baffling if i think how many years i ve spent knocking that door the silent reply should be a clear enough answer but i m just a fool but then the reasons started to fade away and i m suddenly tired and that s that well if only it stayed that way a moment of weakness and here i am knocking the door once again stuck in a meaningless routine one seeks out for changes and one opportunity came up definetely the opposite of comfort zone but i have to for the sake my sanity and ego of course it s not easy and these past weeks really exhaust me mentally so uhm i don t know what say anymore about this actually there is this question whose answer would shift my world into a different lane something i sought after for a long time then the time comes when it could happens in the near future that s when i realised i ve been driving blind but one at a time shall we there is this story i ve read somewhere about two prisoners in cells separated by a solid but thin wall day by day they talk through the wall about their dreams and different world about the different view they see from the small window of their cells and one day some day one is released from the prison how much people can change without realising it years gone by and suddenly there is this stranger in the other side of the mirror i want to believe that the good me is always there but hey who am i kidding what s amusing is that when someone think that i m somewhat better than what i think i deserved i must be wearing some convincing masks all this time der lebenslangeschicksalsschatz der beinaheleidenschaftsgegenstand aoi tamago 11 minggu mar 2012 posted by adityo ananta in art entertainment fun tinggalkan komentar this is a song from pale cocoon a short post apocalyptic ova anime about recovering history the story is not that interesing even though the arts are amazing but what caught my attention is the poetic song in it here is the translation of the lyric the morning the forest slept the smoke contrailing in the sky intersects with the horizon forming a silver cross the morning the sea slept the moon s waiting came to an end the cradle which waxes and wanes revealed itself as prayer s substitute that is the last angel that is the vestigial horn the pale cocoon which cannot hatch even if we lost our smile the morning the planet slept only the sky the cloudy sky during the era in which god was present wet strawberries glittered in gardens we promise someday to meet again we will not forget you source gendou com pintu 03 sabtu mar 2012 posted by adityo ananta in thought tinggalkan komentar tag kunci pintu so it has come to this dan pintu itu pun tertutup beberapa waktu lalu akhirnya tidak bisa dibilang ideal tapi intinya sama menyisakan tanya namun apa pun jawabannya tidak lagi penting tak perlu pula mencari kunci yang bisa membuka pintu perandaian i ve done enough but still it amazed me is it so hard to be honest even at the end it s not an act of kindness no tapi hey toh tidak seberat yang diduga pendulum 17 rabu agu 2011 posted by adityo ananta in idle talk not that important tinggalkan komentar senantiasa bergerak senantiasa berayun senantiasa di tempat yang sama friksi mengikis momentum dan akhirnya berhenti kesempatan kedua 19 sabtu feb 2011 posted by adityo ananta in personal thought tinggalkan komentar hujan turun deras deru hujan selalu merupakan melodi alam yang indah di telinga ku dialog malam sebelumnya serasa tidak nyata diringi irama hujan tebersit senyuman hidup adalah pilihan yang kadang berakhir dengan penyesalan serangkaian peristiwa seakan mengarahkan untuk memperbaiki salah satu nya hal yang seharusnya ku lakukan sejak dulu tapi ku selalu mencari cari pembenaran untuk menghindarinya tapi hidup dengan perasaan bersalah meninggalkan sesuatu tidak terselesaikan dengan baik layaknya pengecut sejati ku tidak mau seperti itu artinya suatu waktu memang harus dilakukan tak terhindarkan rencana disusun kata kata disiapkan mencari pengalihan agar tidak terlalu banyak berpikir hari itu tiba ragu dan takut seperti diduga sudah menanti untuk menghadang saat seperti ini biasanya ku membuat kondisi yang harus dipenuhi terlebih dahulu sebelum ku maju kondisi yang sulit untuk dipenuhi sehingga bisa menjadi alasan meski sadar tidak ada hubungannya sama sekali dan kondisi tersebut ternyata gagal dicapai ketika kekecewaan yang muncul ku sadar artinya ku benar benar ingin melakukannya tidak ada lagi opsi mundur kalau begitu ku hanya berani berharap setidaknya kerusakan yang kuperbuat bisa diperbaiki tak lebih terwujud atau tidak masing masing memiliki konsekuensi itulah harga yang harus dibayar dan tak lama segala kekhawatiran itu pun sirna kesempatan kedua awal yang bersih tantangan untuk tidak mengacaukannya kembali semoga sang pemimpi mempunyai harapan mempertanyakan mengapa kadang berarti harus berkutat di perbatasan irasionalitas dan jawaban yang memuaskan mungkin tak akan ada sang pemimpi memiliki keraguan dan rasa takut ragu apa ia layak berharap takut akan kekecewaan ketika harapan tidak berbuah ada kalanya ketika sang pemimpi menemui jalan buntu untuk membuang asa itu ia tidak mampu maka disimpanlah dibalik sebuah pintu yang tertutup rapat meski tak terlihat ia tahu ada di sana meski tak terlihat tetap menoreh luka lalu mengapa keengganan membuangnya berbicara dengan sendirinya namun bila memang harus terjadi maka terjadi pintu itu pun dapat kembali terbuka 2010 dalam untaian kata 01 sabtu jan 2011 posted by adityo ananta in daily life idle talk not that important personal thought tinggalkan komentar catatan peristiwa tahun lalu smartphone pertama dibeli secara impulsif maksud hati memberi hadiah untuk diri sendiri setelah sekian lama apa daya momen nya sedikit hilang karena diundur secara sepihak p habis pc terbitlah laptop setelah 4 tahun lebih akhirnya dia memutuskan bahwa dunia terlalu kejam untuknya dan sudah tiba saat baginya untuk meninggalkan semua _ sekarang masih bingung bagaimana cara membuang mayat dr pc itu dan masih ada data yang masih tertinggal di dalam hard disk nya pula ya sudahlah aplikasi pertama untuk umum komutta hasil kolaborasi dengan mreunion labs dan sudah ada di android market akhirnya jadi juga membuat sesuatu yang bermanfaat buat orang lain semoga bukan jadi aplikasi terakhir masih terjebak di tempat yang sama tapi dibalik itu semua ada beberapa hal yang mungkin tak akan terjadi bila jalan yang dilalui sudah berbeda karena itulah mungkin berat mungkin tak sesuai keinginan tapi tak ada yang sia sia tiba masanya dimana penyangkalan itu harus berakhir bulan bulan yang menyiksa harus diakhiri ada sedikit beban yang terangkat meski tak bisa menghilangkan rasa kecewa itu apa mau dikata ketika sesuatu yang kau pikir adalah takdir mu terlepas begitu saja pelajaran penting jangan bermain api bila tak ingin terbakar diawali dari eksperimen kecil hingga akhirnya ikut terjebak menjadi objek eksperimen itu sendiri ok terlalu abstrak memang karena sengaja biarlah untuk konsumsi pribadi saja batasan antara menginginkan sesuatu karena benar benar menginginkannya atau karena sekedar tidak ingin melewatkan mungkin satu satunya kesempatan untuk mendapatkannya adalah sangat tipis sekali saat itu rasionalitas terasa bagai ilusi ingat jalani hidup tanpa penyesalan selagi masih ada waktu untuk memperbaiki sesuatu selagi jendela kesempatan itu masih terbuka manfaatkan itu atau lupakan sama sekali dan jangan lihat ke belakang lagi segalanya akan lebih mudah bila semua orang bisa jujur tapi kita manusia yang diberi cobaan dengan harga diri yang melekat dan keraguan yang senantiasa hadir dan begitulah adanya let it go 30 rabu jun 2010 posted by adityo ananta in idle talk personal thought 3 komentar yesterday my big plan ended up in failure why i m not surprised i feel that lately i ve been betrayed by my own wishes i guess it s true then that if something can goes wrong then it will speaking of wishes maybe it s a godd time for me to learn to let go of something one of my luckless hope few days ago i lost something that i ve been keeping for months something that remind me why i have to give up that hope honestly i didn t know how to react i felt a mixed of emptiness and relief i know i can t ever forget it no one can so be it anyway in this quiet morning i make a little toast for myself cheers smoke 18 jumat jun 2010 posted by adityo ananta in quote tinggalkan komentar when you re in a town that s covered with smoke you forget that there s a world outside nothing amazing happened here and so we get used to a world where everything is ordinary everyday spent here is like a whole lifetime of dying slowly takkun flcl older posts blog stats 300 643 hits judge me say what you thought about me positive negative my archives my archives pilih bulan januari 2015 1 november 2013 1 juni 2013 1 maret 2012 2 agustus 2011 1 februari 2011 1 januari 2011 1 juni 2010 4 april 2009 3 mei 2008 9 april 2008 2 maret 2008 2 februari 2008 3 januari 2008 1 desember 2007 1 november 2007 3 oktober 2007 5 september 2007 3 agustus 2007 8 juli 2007 4 juni 2007 6 mei 2007 6 april 2007 11 maret 2007 9 februari 2007 9 januari 2007 9 desember 2006 2 november 2006 7 oktober 2006 11 september 2006 10 juli 2006 5 juni 2006 13 mei 2006 3 april 2006 2 maret 2006 6 februari 2006 15 januari 2006 7 recent posts objectives a fool s errand 946684800 aoi tamago pintu pendulum kesempatan kedua 2010 dalam untaian kata let it go smoke di kantor finding myself parodi para pecundang angka angka cilincing brotherhood stochastic manga review the scarlet letter review othello review the count of monte cristo review the stories of edgar allan poe review hoshi no samidare the lucifer and biscuit hammer review hyakkiyakou shou selected pandemonium y m review emma bangaihen review emma review tomie twitter twit oleh ananta meta buat akun masuk feed entri feed komentar wordpress com blog di wordpress com berlangganan langganan life is like that daftarkan saya sudah punya akun wordpress com login sekarang privasi 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