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feeling dramatic i love the moon and the magic feeling dramatic i love the moon and the magic batsandbutch bats 28 kpop multistan and tv obsession blog they them he him on special occasions bias list bats gif batsandbutch black market dykes blackmarketdykes neocities org get yer punk trans zine about being a suicidal trans kid at blackmarketdykes neocities org 10 months ago 14 notes zines bats txt eternalgaylord collecting tweets eternalgaylord vessel alert that s right 1 hour ago 66 124 notes targetedknowledge 1 hour ago 27 455 notes pjharvey we have to start running a massive psa campaign to young gay people so everyone understands there is a difference between being a dom and being a top and between being a sub and being a bottom and also that sometimes you are neither a sub nor a bottom and you re just like shy we need to be handing out flyers we need ads at every train station spreading the word 1 hour ago 20 304 notes knifearo anonymous it s really cool to see someone who is in the exact same kind of relationship that i am for once i get comfort from both the aros can be in romantic relationships too as well as the aros dont ever have to date kinds of posts but it always feels as if both of these awkwardly exclude me i never thought i d find someone else who was fine with their partner calling the relationship romantic for them but not for themselves relationships can be just as messy and nuanced as identity itself but i dont think most people are ready to admit that knifearo even in places where relationship anarchy is talked about the aro community being a big one at least from what i ve seen it s still difficult to find people s accounts of like how they put relationship anarchy into practice i don t know relationships are like gender to me in the way that every social construct is the same every person is an individual every individual is going to have their own approach to gender just because we have these two major categories doesn t mean that it isn t infinitely variable and extremely personal relationships are typically categorized as romantic platonic or familial but the truth is that those categories are just as made up as the binary gender system sure they pop up a lot and sure they might be helpful for you to apply for yourself but ultimately every relationship is unique once you start thinking outside of those arbitrary boxes hold on i got so caught up in thinking about how to explain it that i stopped writing this post to draw a diagram alt with anything listed being a stand in for whatever else you can think of obviously but that s the thing it s like you don t have to use the presets everything is infinitely customizeable you are always creating unique relationships with other people you just don t think of it that way once you approach every relationship in your life with an open mindset suddenly there are beautiful beautiful possibilities for all kinds of connections with other human beings as always i fall back on my favorite phrase which is you can do whatever you want forever because you can 1 hour ago 198 notes special agent dale gooper wrenchinator central 1 hour ago 68 496 notes shinyeternatus they want you to care more about job than yuri don t fall for this scam 1 hour ago 12 168 notes partywithponies daily affirmations at least i m not in high school at least i m not a teenager at least i m not addicted to ai at least i don t waste time and money on a daily 12 step skincare routine at least i m not american 1 hour ago 3 006 notes unfortunately i am british which is also bad ritavonbees but riddle me this billy when can i objectively know that i have in fact made passes at women of all classes are we just going broadly upper middle lower or do we need to have involved discussions about relationship with the means of production alternately should i be aiming to hit on a cleric a ranger a paladin 3 hours ago 7 notes maxiemartmanager 4 hours ago 15 845 notes 3liza absolutely the worst part of the male helplessness fetishism is that men know about it and will weaponize it against you they will fuck up and do stupid shit and pretend not to know how to clean a mirror or find grapes at the grocery store and then simper and giggle expecting you to think its adorable and then they will get really angry when you do not resemblingthegrave men who struggled to anticipate domestic problems or follow a project through to its end frequently described success in occupations requiring the very same skills they were said to lack at home nina for example described her husband julian as temperamentally ill equipped for the frenetic multitasking and constant forecasting she relied on to juggle home paid work and child care if something is broken in the house and julian gets used to it he will not consider it a problem she explained this pattern predated their marriage in his apartment before we got married there was a hole in the wall and he and his roommates just left it they were just like this is okay it was sort of tragedy of the commons in that situation where like no one five roommates no one felt the responsibility if something is broken in our lives today in terms of a physical appliance or something and he s gotten used to not having it it filters out of his mind whereas for me it s an ever present issue in another couple trevor drew a contrast between his super organized wife mindy and his own deadline challenged and scattered tendencies he struggled with follow through i m in charge of laundry so i will wash it put it in the dryer but somehow i lose interest by then getting it from the dryer and folding it it slips my mind that that s also part of doing laundry he described himself as slower to learn new things too in general as a personality trait i would say it would be a lot more difficult for me to do things which my wife is doing for her than to pick up things which i have been doing just overall she s better at that kind of thing like picking up a task and doing it it seems obvious that the guy who doesn t notice holes in the wall shouldn t be in charge of managing home upkeep or that the man with a tendency to overlook deadlines should probably not be the calendar keeper but these particular men worked as a surgeon and a nonprofit founder respectively positions that certainly rely on attention to detail and deadlines what s on her mind the mental workload of family life by allison damiger 4 hours ago 33 753 notes on page 1 of 3661