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e up first and they definitely win the best packaging award entertech here went for a classic monster motif with a frankenstein and a dracula ball apparently entertech were making all sorts of water based toys in the 80s like motorized water pistols and stuff thankfully they moved into the monster ball market with these look how cool that cover is dracula and frankenstein frolicking together oh my god they re having such a good time they re smiling i like to think that they were on some sort of monster retreat at an ancient transylvanian castle to build creature character complete with trust exercises entertech making better monsters oh god the back is just as good look at that graphic like you couldn t figure out how these worked on your own but it s really cute anyway onto the balls the frankenstein is pretty cool but a little more cartoony than the drac it reminds me a little of that weird 60 s cartoon stylized frank monster ball from before i like the purple bags under his eyes and his weird wrinkley mouth the best part however it the fact that the water squirts from the giant half stitched wound in his head the dracula is pretty cool too but in a different way it actually kinda looks like bela lugosi it s really well sculpted and designed especially for something this small it makes me even more mad about the zombie zoo idiots they were so much larger and so much worse guh moving from the 80s to the 90s we come to these regular style spitballs well spitball i only have one and it s a pretty cool one it s named 20 20 and it s a giant oculus orbus influenced eyeball thing the back of the package is full of drawings and slogans and other fun stuff including more instructions why is it so hard for people to figure out how to use these things there were only four of these a shark a bomb and a crying baby were the others a shark is pretty cool but the other two wtf lame guys that s the same kind of lame i would expect from super bouncing weird balls or foul ba oh my god landard i know those idiots they actually made foul balls oof those were so horrible but dare i say these are pretty good so what s the deal oh that s the deal they finally make a monster ball that s half decent and it s poisonous full of lead ahhhhhhhhh maybe it s some monster ball assassin trying to snuff me out for talking smack on their other toy lines but that would mean that it was made in the 90 s in in preparation for my late aughts betrayal like the terminator well now that i know my arch madball enemy has tried to assassinate me let s get this over with and look at this stupid ball i mean the disembodied eye is a classic monsterball design and this one is filled with details all those lines in iris and the three dimensional veins i will say that it s weird that the actual eye ball has a brow that doesn t make sense but it is cool look how gross those giant veins are in the back ew it s almost as bad as that goddamn lanard logo idiots and because you ve all been so good you get a family portrait well actually its so you can see scale in conclusion i d suggest these guys to anyone they re fun and well designed ok maybe i wouldn t suggest the spitball because it s full of lead but the other ones totally get em posted by michael bukowski at 11 00 am 1 comments labels imitations madballs monster spitballs rip offs spitballs monday july 9 2012 give pop pop your hair the hairy balls you hurl so someone was in a board meeting at cadaco and pitched that catch phrase you know the one about the hairy balls probably guys in suits or at the very least business casual and coffee and a giant 90 s computer they tossed various ideas around but the one that they liked so much they put it on the front and back of the package was the hairy balls you hurl despite that ridiculous faux pas i have to admit that these are pretty cool they re made of soft hollow rubber filled with details and the designs themselves are pretty cool there must have been a monster ball revival in the 90 s that i wasn t aware of or paying attention to freak balls spitballs and these guys all popped up around then i had heard of these dudes but never actually seen one for sale anywhere the package pictures below i saw and stole from skullbrain org but that s it never saw one at a toy show or even so much as a few strands of that gross hair at the bottom of a berlin farmer s mart 1 toy bin then one popped up on ebay followed by a pair that were on etsy all three were ridiculously cheap partially making up for how much i spent on those stupid stupid zombie zoos we ll get to the toys in a sec for now let s look at these internet captured package pics right off the bat these guys are doing better than most they have names and little bios as well as full color pics of each one on the back well done cadaco the person i stole these pics from was kind enough to take a close up of the copyright info i did a little internet hunting and found out that cadaco is still alive and kicking in fact they made this awesome thing so let s move onto the actual hairy balls this first one is one of my favorites of that 90 s era doc hairline fracture is a combo mad scientist monster creation complete with stitches bulging blooshot eyes wrinkley green skin and lots of teeth kinda like dr teeth the detail in the sculpt is amazing so many little folds and warts even the paint job is good the veins in the eyes are super cool but the most important thing that separates these from the myriads of knock offs in the 80 s and 90 s are those disgusting strands i appreciate the fact that cadaco tried to do something that would set them apart but why oh why did they put hair on these it s so gross which i guess makes sense when you re making gross out toys ew next up we have one of the rarest of all monster balls a definite lady monster ball other than snake bait i don t know of another monster ball that is purposely designed as a lady it s a shame because i m sure there were a bunch of gross creepy girls that enjoyed these toys back then mouldy locks here is a gross gross toy for all the ladies some sort of zombie with warts wrinkles and splatters of slime and those disgusting curly green locks i don t really mind the hair that much but it s odd because these hurlers would ve worked even without that added touch lastly we have this weirdo buzz head he s not my favorite but i ve never been a fan of the regular guy madballs ie screamin meemie he just looks like a gross dude with buck teeth and red hair again though there s tons of details that make him better than most of the bull crap imitations up above you can see what these morons look like compared to actual madballs they re roughly the same size but made of sadball material and of course with hair in conclusion if you can track these dumb dumbs down you shouldn t buy them because i call dibs unless they re the ones i already have then go for it they don t pop up too often though so be vigilant and good hunting posted by michael bukowski at 10 00 am 4 comments labels 90 s hairy hurlers imitations knock offs madballs rip offs monday july 2 2012 the new spew review mangy mutants oh god seriously i can t believe i decided to restart this blog with these awful idiots like i know i ve posted some garbage in the past like foul balls super bouncing weird balls but zombie zoo is by far the worst ok maybe not by far but they re pretty bad i have to say i was excited when i saw these pop up on ebay because zombie zoo was a kind of rip off i d always heard about but never actually seen i heard people refer to them and even read a few descriptions but never had i actually glimpsed one like the cryptids of the monster ball kingdom and much like someone that searches for a bigfoot or a chupacabra i would ve been better off having not seen them the packaging is misleading with full color drawings a super awesome logo blood and lightning multiple slogans and even a backstory present these idiots to be way better than they are look at those drawings they re only a little bit worse than some james groman work that s saying something but the execution oof we ll get to that in a minute before that i ll type out their origin for you one night when the moon was full a weird color slime was found in a local city zoo cages were found open bars were bent and the result is the ugliest mangiest bunch of zombies ever to escape captivity beware of the zombie zoo collection while i do appreciate that they took the time to write a story it is pretty lazy what was the slime where did it come from why does the monkey have a vice on his head if he s a mutant ps guys these play balls are not recommended for ages 3 and under there s got to be a better way to say that oh and those slogans throw em mangy mutants and creepy bouncy so lazy that drawing of that kid is pretty cool though look at him throwing on the back of the package you can see all the cool drawings and names with even short descriptions of each guy this is so much more effort than the dummies that made super bouncing weird balls put into their product it s too bad the sculptors they hired were a bunch or moronic idiots with toes for fingers seriously look at bone breath here well first look up at the picture that shows the drawings of them then look down at this guy something was lost in translation details were deleted nuances were tossed in the trash and paint jobs were haphazard and this is the best one monkey mash here is maybe the second best at least as far as one looking like the animal it is supposed to represent he s way worse that the drawing though i think he s supposed to have a vice on his head but again just a huge pile of lumps and sloppy paint ok ok ok this one is horrible atrocious like what is this i m guessing from the name wart rus he s supposed to be a walrus but maybe a walrus sculpted by a blind person that has never even heard a walrus described to them i think his eyes are supposed to be stitched shut and his nose is bleeding ketchup but then what are the two indented holes in between his nostrils and eyes ugghhhhhh it s killing me as a madball aficionado i am offended sirs even the material they used is abysmal they re foam like madballs but really soft foam it looks like there were bubbles in it that popped and left huge gaping holes in it guh nope i was wrong this is the worst one bloody bull noooooooooooooooooooooo this is not a bull a why would it be blue b it s not a shaped like a bull c it s not shaped like any animal d it kinda looks like trumpy e fuck you these write ups are actually starting to hurt now not emotionally but physically it s paining me to write them my stomach hurts and i have a headache because this is supposed to be an elephant missing an eye eye lephant it makes me even madder that the names are cool but the toys themselves are the worst like the worst i may have just pooped myself from awful vein brain dumb i can t even write this one up i mean i guess i can but i don t really want to a dog with a leash around it s neck and in its mouth and veins in his ears and his head cut off and it kinda looks racist wtf no no no no no bad i guess if you want to you can see the size comparison zombie zoos are larger and the foam is softer and they are also the worst the worst no no no as far as the dillholes responsible i ve looked up panville inc from chicago and i ve found nothing not a thing which is good because that means they stopped after they unleashed this hell in ball form in conclusion only an idiot anal retentive collector would ever spend more than 1 on any of these stupid dummies and trust me i spent way more than that boooooooo the next post will be something way cooler i promise posted by michael bukowski at 10 00 am 5 comments labels imitations knock offs madballs rip offs zombie zoo thursday february 23 2012 more to come just a sample of some of the new stuff i ve acquired and will post about soon sorry for the wait posted by michael bukowski at 8 56 pm 0 comments monday january 23 2012 more mini mock madball madness no comment well dudes and dudettes i ve been managing to upkeep this blog more than i actually thought possible today we have some tiny terrors that i know some of you nerds out there are obsessed with see these guys seem to be in higher demand because they overlap crazed collector criteria they appeal to the maniacal madball enthusiasts as well as the little rubber toy aficionados i ve heard horror stories about people trying to track these down but i ve managed to amass quite a collection without even going out of my way to do so ebay lots that i ve won often come with a few of these crammed in the box as an added bonus or an added bogus most of these little grotesqueries are minute renditions of larger dudes and seem to be some sort of pencil top eraser or eraser material these two for example are tiny takes on the classic devil sadball and the horrible horn head the problem with these two is that the material doesn t work well this small there are crease lines and the details aren t too crisp see how small this dude is regardless of the loss of clarity both of these are pretty neat they would be perfect if you were a really small person like miniature and madballs were too large for you to hold in your freakishly tiny hands then again i guess you d have other things to worry about besides your toy collection like cats and tarantulas and being so small that you cease to exist on a molecular level now i m sad not anymore look at these idiots another madball rip off argh and two more sadball rip offs blood bulge and broken brain though i think at the point you rip off a rip off you become something else entirely like a rip rip off the rubber these three are made of is a little bit sturdier than the previous dorks so they look a little better they also appear to have been painted at some point that s pretty cool i actually prefer mini blood bulge to the adult version because that design was pretty sparse in the first place cramming all those features on a 1 ball makes it look cooler oh god these triplets i got them in a lot and i like them but they are uuuuuggggly almost too ugly like the first guy is kind of hard to make out i guess he s a fang toothed dude with a pig nose hogrible will be his name the second dude is the real problem i know this isn t the greatest picture but even holding him in my hand in the light i couldn t make out what the hell is going on with his face at first my hypothesis as a madball academic is that he s a dude with half a skull and a mouth full of worms maggot mouth it is until someone else looks at it and tells me what s up the last one is the most simple but also the easiest to see he s just a generic monster type his name is gener ick from now on the triplets here suffer from the same eraser material syndrome as our first two freaks but those two the eraser rubber hardened over time these three have a porous softness to them that makes...