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Text of the page (random words):
ome things that have been on my mind so if you like my blog and you wouldn t mind if you subscribe to my blog here please visit my new site and subscribe there currently the actual url of the blog is http braindungeon com blog but you can also get there by going to http braindungeon com i hope i see you there posted by dustin at 8 15 pm no comments labels moving thursday april 30 2009 energy drinks dear stacy s friend who works at a convenience store and sent a whole case of energy drinks with her to our office as a promotional thing i want to thank you for your generosity in thinking about stacy and the people she works with working in an office all day long can actually be quite draining and sitting in front of a computer all day can literally make people lose all will to actually even move their fingers to type i think that s why voice recognition software was created having liquid energy in 16oz cans sitting in our office fridge is hugely convenient anyway while i am appreciative of the gesture i thought i would let you know what happened after consuming my first 6 cans during my lunch hour yesterday first of all i was mildly amused by the moniker of earth shattering energy on the can at first after the third can or so i realized that this was no amusing matter truth be told i am a little concerned that my internal organs may not stop violently spasming i probably should have stopped after the 5th can as the mri at the er last night revealed severe bruising of my brain they asked if i had been in an accident of some kind because it was like my brain had bounced around in my skull violently for hours i guess it s a good thing they re low carb imagine if i d had all that sugar too also did you know that one serving of that energy drink has 100 recommended daily values of niacin b3 190 of b6 and 180 of b12 did you also know that there are 2 servings per can i guess consuming 1200 of b3 2280 of b6 and 2160 of b12 in under an hour throws your vitamin balance a little off i couldn t touch a computer for the rest of the day because my body actually absorbed all the a s c s d s and e s off every screen and keyboard i came in contact with imagine that i had the energy and will to work but couldn t i did some reading on the symptoms of overdosing on b vitamins but there is one side effect that i suffered that i couldn t seem to correlate and was wondering if you d heard of it after about 2 hours and 8 more cans of energy drink the two separate hemispheres of my brain seemed to begin operating independantly of each other and without regard to my willful operation of the finer motor functions of my own body my right arm ripped my left arm clean off my body and started beating me in the face with it i ran around the office screaming for help but no one would come near me and when i say ran i m using the term loosely my left leg ran but my right leg stubbornly stood in one place so really i was just spinning around in circles have you ever beaten yourself in the face with your own dismembered arm while spinning in circles and screaming apparently others see that is crazy the blows must have been pretty forceful too because although the bruising and cracked bones in my face will heal quickly i am still having trouble finding the middle and ring fingers of my left arm i think it is important to note at this point that my right arm was the prosthetic one as i can generally be a little crazy at work it took a while for anyone to realize just how serious a reaction i was having i must have told them over and over i really needed help but apparently it was coming out as fada bada bada bada bluh bluh bluh ffff thbbbbbb while this isn t completely unusual for me in the office this time i hadn t been on a tech support call for the last hour lastly i thought it interesting to note that until the final 4 cans yesterday i thought the term jumping out of my skin was just a euphimism did you know seeing a living human body with no skin can actually make people vomit although it probably didn t help that my skeleton wasn t much support for all the meat because it had vibrated to almost complete liquification anyway sorry to go on and on but i just wanted to thank you again for thinking of us aside from the missing fingers the doctors seem confident that i will be mostly back to normal after a heart transplant brain surgery and after they reapply my skin and re attach my left arm i look forward to trying the other flavors of that energy drink posted by dustin at 9 19 am 4 comments labels absurd funny humor insanity neurotic sunday march 22 2009 a nifty little tool i am sure that this is true for most if not all iphone users that is that i m always on the lookout for apps that i can get some good use out of early on one of the things i found myself frustrated with was the inability to post to this blog from the blogger website in mobile safari to my amazement even the iphone app for google only opened up safari which wouldn t allow me to post a blog in blogger unless i am just clueless as to how it works a few weeks ago i purchased iblogger which would supposedly let me create posts for my blogger account unfortunately i just can t get it to work i got it to work on a wordpress blog but every time i tried to get to this blogger blog iblogger would just crash i am confident that the developer can solve the problem given some time i only reported the issue last night i was going to just wait for a response but i accidentally came across another app called skypetr lite i was searching to see what apps existed out there that provided access to skype while i found something earlier today that did just that i was curious what else was out there needless to say i downloaded skypetr lite which is free it s meant for use with myspace youtube and of course blogger i haven t checked out the first two yet but this post has been successfully and entirely composed using skypetr lite the only downside i have seen so far is that you are required to register an account with skypetr before you can sign in and access the other items i am not sure i understand that logic other than a means of getting your email address nonetheless for now i am ok with it at least i was able to compose this post on my phone posted by dustin at 5 17 pm 3 comments friday february 27 2009 proof positive i came across irrefutable proof that an apple is not always a good alternative to windows ok so here was the scenario i was working in yet another one of our new restaurants and what you re seeing in this picture is what will eventually be a drive thru window the drive thru windows have not yet been installed so the wooden structure is the solution to keep the windows closed anyway out of nowhere i had this idea to go buy an apple from the convenience store next door yes they sell fresh fruit in this convenience store set it on the window sill and snap a picture and make a joke out of it i had another caption i was going to try this is what happens when a construction foreman overhears the technical team discussing the possibility of installing an apple instead of windows either way i really thought this was hilarious i think i laughed about it all dang day hope y all get a chuckle out of it posted by dustin at 8 55 pm 5 comments labels funny humor wednesday february 18 2009 the wall handle explained i showed my last blog post to a co worker and she used the google to find the mysterious handle why didn t i think of that anywho here it is in all its glory so what is it it s a handle that you can put on walls or in showers without the need for drilling or screws duh if you so desire to check out their website since i did use the image off their website it can be found here now if only i could get the doggone context of the whole infomercial in order i might win back some of my sanity posted by dustin at 12 24 pm no comments sunday february 8 2009 more silence and then came the infomercial here i am i ve been busy and busy and busy and well something came up that i just have to share for the past week i have been visiting several of our restaurants before opening time and at closing time to perform some updates to the databases in their registers this is a fairly arduous task and has been the cause of some sleep deprivation i ve had this past week every day i have been up some time between 3am and 4am for those of you who are particular about it that s central standard time so that i could be in the stores and have the full process completed before they opened their doors at 6 then i would visit a store at 10 and perform the updates and get out of the stores around 12 or 1 again central standard time there was also work to be done during the day and i did my best to catch some z s when i had some down time but 2 things kept that from happening 1 i have a very hard time sleeping during the day and 2 people have a very hard time calling me without making my phone ring so even if i did happen to doze off my phone would ring within a few minutes and wake me up even sleeping at night was tough this week because of all the thinking involved in getting this done right it was hard to turn my brain off when it was actually time to sleep so most days i was on less than 4 hours of sleep and even one day i was on 1 5 hours of sleep i m not sure why i m telling you all this except for maybe it sets the stage for the kind of mood i was in this particular morning you see friday night was the first night i was able to get more than 4 hours of sleep i probably would have slept until 9 or 10 had my phone not rang at 7 20 i had also taken my pain medicine the night before so i was pretty groggy but all in all i was in a decent mood because i was going to go home 3 hour drive from where i was so i go down for a continental breakfast and sit down with a bagel some yogurt and a banana i turn to the large flat screen tv mounted on the wall which has the sound turned down i am watching what appears to be some kind of shopping network or something i can t really tell what s going on since there s no sound but usually one can deduce what s going on in an infomercial right wrong there are two people on the screen one man and one woman the man appears to be the informercial salesman and the woman appears to be the infomercial oooooooh and aaaaahhhh person i see the man take something that looks like a large phone receiver and stick it to a wall when i say it looked like a phone receiver i mean it looked a lot like the photo to the left except the color was white there was no cord and the round parts were much bigger it looked like some make shift wall handle my first thought was oh yes because i ve always wanted a handle on my wall funny yes but i thought i d continue watching to see what the purpose for this phone receiver looking wall mountable handle might actually be no such lu ck the man moved on to another bizarre task he took 4 or 5 rectangular and brightly colored sponges and put them on the table in front of the woman he then takes a chef s knife as pictured to the right and presses down on the stack of sponges i think oh the guy is going to cut sponges with a knife but what s with the handle on the wall patiently i wait for the answer to the wall handle question and continue to push down on the stack of sponges and nothing happens well the sponges compress but there is no cutting going on so the guy reaches over and starts sharpening the knife i think to myself ohhh he s going to sharpen the knife and then cut the sponges he s selling a knife sharpener but what s with the handle on the wall so he finishes sharpening the knife and presses the knife down on the sponges this time quite a bit harder i m thinking if pressing harder did the trick then how am i supposed to know if your sharpener worked bright guy but once again nothing the woman is smiling and nodding and saying something but i don t know what for all i know she could be saying if you keep trying to cut the sponges maybe people won t notice the large plastic handle on the wall right next to me so the guy starts sharpening the knife again if it s an informercial for the knife sharpener this is not going well so he takes his twice sharpened chef s knife and pressed down really hard on the sponges this time he starts sawing at the sponges nothing the woman picks up the top sponge and looks at a tiny cut in the top of it and looks like she s impressed that he was actually able to cut a small slit into the sponge i m thinking yay he sharpened it enough to cut a sponge now i can use it to cut meat now what s with the handle on the wall as if to press my insanity over the wall handle to new levels and confuse everything that makes up my mental capacity the guy then reaches over and picks up a generic can of cola and a square of carpet ohhhhh i think to myself he s selling sponges he s going to make a mess and clean it up so the guy proceeds to dump the entire contents of the can of generic cola onto the square of carpet that is now sitting ont he counter right next to the sponges in front of the woman i called that nope he then reaches over and picks up a large chamois and starts mopping the cola up off the carpet at this point i m thinking ok so the guy is nothing more than a raving lunatic who wants to cut sponges and when that doesn t work he has to throw a tantrum by dumping his soda all over the counter and then feels guilt ridden enough to mop up the mess but what the heck is with that freaking handle on the wall i am sorry to report that i have no idea what that was all about i don t know why the guy dumped out the soda and mopped it up i don t know why he tried three times to cut a stack of colorful sponges in fact had the sound been on i d almost be willing to bet that he tried to cut the sponges the woman remarked wow those are some tough sponges and then he would have replied yeah too bad they can t clean for crap so here s a chamois and i don t know why he put a handle on the wall please please one of my readers out there please tell me that you ve seen this infomercial and can fill me in on what it was all about my mental wellness may very well depend on it posted by dustin at 11 04 am 3 comments labels absurd humor insanity sunday december 21 2008 another month later wow where has the time gone what a silly question i didn t intend to start my post by contradicting myself but i got to thinking about that question as i was typing it and thought to myself time doesn t go anywhere i know i m a goof but it s true you know time doesn t go anywhere time stands still if you will time is one of those things that everyone has and you can t save it or store it you can just use it or waste it hopefully how you re satisfied with how you re using your time i really didn t mean to go there how drab anyway it s been yet another month since my last post what s dustin been doing where has dustin been what s been on dustin s mind lots i ve spent qui...