Meta tags:

Headings (most frequently used words):

2018, july, the, 2019, saturday, friday, june, you, for, 100, word, story, sunday, january, monday, thursday, april, me, buy, my, dammit, and, yet, old, crap, to, cheese, level, today, doo, on, road, 13, 12, december, 31, august, 19, wednesday, 11, 22, 15, 10, may, 26, tuesday, 24, 14, about, book, kid, handmade, needle, felted, finger, puppets, too, cast, characters, more, self, aggrandizement, subscribe, know, want, popular, posts, lookin, categorically, speaking, bloggers, ve, met, blogroll, buddies, logroll, place, miscellaneous, useless, terror, alert, am, whore, lunacy, index, where, is, at, steven, barry, krodman, 1952, bye, now, ave, atque, vale, great, powerful, legacy, wiped, out, war, deep, what, another, blog, atlanta, nomenclature, earworm, rage, brought, whole, new, mister, coffee, there, are, limits, even, sinfonia, magnetica, porridge,

Text of the page (most frequently used words):
the (241), and (146), ago (115), years (101), you (57), this (54), that (54), for (50), share (47), was (40), with (40), his (40), elisson (34), one (33), but (30), have (29), are (27), 2018 (26), all (21), comments (19), doctor (19), there (18), had (18), steve (17), may (16), road (16), not (16), about (16), our (16), can (16), would (16), been (16), just (15), pinterest (15), facebook (15), blogthis (15), email (15), posted (15), other (14), great (14), when (13), from (13), blog (13), out (13), july (13), january (13), 2011 (13), 2012 (13), 2013 (13), 2014 (13), 2015 (13), 2016 (13), 2017 (13), has (13), your (13), labels (13), who (13), year (12), she (12), some (12), june (12), they (12), him (12), word (11), rants (11), here (11), now (11), krodman (11), like (11), man (11), never (11), hot (11), which (11), old (10), days (10), august (10), december (10), march (10), april (10), 2019 (10), many (10), more (10), cereal (10), time (10), into (10), will (10), being (10), family (10), cheese (9), miscellaneous (9), months (9), 100 (9), stories (9), posts (9), those (9), got (9), know (9), october (9), november (9), most (9), dee (9), coffee (9), any (8), where (8), day (8), mister (8), 2010 (8), september (8), february (8), her (8), take (8), these (8), their (8), name (8), how (8), could (8), every (8), were (8), love (8), daughter (8), life (8), lost (7), see (7), com (7), post (7), people (7), much (7), wheat (7), even (7), new (7), after (7), another (7), atlanta (7), peachtree (7), get (7), without (6), jewish (6), place (6), white (6), off (6), writing (6), only (6), esteemed (6), readers (6), almost (6), morning (6), grits (6), cream (6), little (6), also (6), roads (6), marietta (6), friends (6), boardman (6), aisle (5), useless (5), hours (5), whole (5), mind (5), rest (5), grew (5), home (5), again (5), friday (5), men (5), what (5), self (5), too (5), well (5), let (5), way (5), think (5), oats (5), first (5), then (5), drop (5), long (5), took (5), both (5), law (5), them (5), elder (5), under (4), given (4), use (4), back (4), crap (4), dead (4), reader (4), georgia (4), science (4), world (4), secretion (4), events (4), end (4), shit (4), comes (4), while (4), want (4), steven (4), ass (4), amazing (4), say (4), yet (4), woodstock (4), having (4), completely (4), milk (4), breakfast (4), made (4), butter (4), rice (4), cut (4), mistress (4), sarcasm (4), still (4), dad (4), saturday (4), humor (4), things (4), down (4), thing (4), does (4), job (4), two (4), before (4), names (4), roswell (4), same (4), monday (4), lightsaber (4), brother (4), care (4), passion (4), website (3), images (3), used (3), level (3), pages (3), week (3), john (3), charlie (3), daily (3), waka (3), goes (3), reading (3), donna (3), art (3), night (3), rocket (3), city (3), last (3), show (3), mine (3), guy (3), look (3), knowledge (3), big (3), vile (3), pop (3), cultcha (3), bye (3), once (3), photograph (3), upon (3), atom (3), barry (3), 1952 (3), deep (3), ever (3), make (3), began (3), erica (3), next (3), something (3), aggrandizement (3), corporate (3), kind (3), whether (3), porridge (3), different (3), than (3), work (3), instant (3), oatmeal (3), bowl (3), own (3), form (3), snot (3), pretty (3), actually (3), steel (3), around (3), maypo (3), actual (3), might (3), few (3), uncle (3), getting (3), least (3), inserted (3), enough (3), yes (3), write (3), limits (3), went (3), paper (3), makes (3), anything (3), news (3), beyond (3), drivers (3), always (3), rage (3), incident (3), words (3), driver (3), whom (3), brought (3), don (3), pinch (3), ease (3), pain (3), trouble (3), street (3), south (3), trickum (3), three (3), story (3), lay (3), beautiful (3), town (3), audience (3), nor (3), several (3), finally (3), read (3), als (3), moving (3), funeral (3), held (3), over (3), himself (3), worth (3), enjoyed (3), etz (3), chaim (3), services (3), taati (3), including (2), files (2), unless (2), 2004 (2), written (2), permission (2), personal (2), commercial (2), please (2), creative (2), license (2), ttlb (2), ecosystem (2), large (2), today (2), bloggy (2), best (2), blogosphere (2), alert (2), red (2), chef (2), exercise (2), turns (2), metrodad (2), stuff (2), gladly (2), feed (2), chocolate (2), example (2), amateur (2), spot (2), adventures (2), human (2), drawn (2), water (2), sugar (2), savory (2), mills (2), simply (2), jews (2), son (2), near (2), hour (2), mostly (2), fat (2), yourish (2), island (2), dax (2), tell (2), straight (2), parkway (2), exactly (2), wolf (2), cox (2), charming (2), voice (2), weeks (2), met (2), 202 (2), doggerel (2), 141 (2), blinded (2), occasions (2), narrischkeit (2), mushpucker (2), everybody (2), current (2), comestibobbles (2), potaboobles (2), cats (2), cartoons (2), blodging (2), blodgers (2), debonair (2), speaking (2), already (2), part (2), women (2), food (2), dear (2), dreaded (2), 55pm (2), sabbath (2), arriving (2), cat (2), piece (2), causes (2), pot (2), minyan (2), boyz (2), club (2), subscribe (2), nothing (2), finding (2), inside (2), obi (2), wan (2), kenobi (2), gone (2), heart (2), entirely (2), sherman (2), except (2), such (2), nine (2), bogner (2), houston (2), buy (2), kid (2), finger (2), dammit (2), book (2), model (2), states (2), older (2), everyone (2), memories (2), involve (2), called (2), latter (2), cold (2), mornings (2), sure (2), open (2), add (2), ground (2), consider (2), dish (2), served (2), committed (2), farina (2), brand (2), mild (2), taste (2), nose (2), thought (2), appreciate (2), its (2), flavor (2), probably (2), bland (2), perfect (2), rolled (2), cook (2), cooking (2), texture (2), pleasure (2), cooked (2), earl (2), grey (2), tea (2), obscure (2), certain (2), age (2), four (2), sweet (2), carry (2), miles (2), away (2), wheatena (2), breakfasts (2), magnificent (2), postscriptum (2), doesn (2), bodily (2), opportunity (2), giant (2), results (2), wait (2), won (2), friend (2), object (2), despite (2), prepubescent (2), done (2), sonnets (2), far (2), size (2), revolting (2), occasion (2), public (2), front (2), room (2), floor (2), range (2), deuce (2), sort (2), appropriate (2), course (2), should (2), did (2), beloved (2), call (2), cause (2), helps (2), whenever (2), needed (2), sunday (2), along (2), face (2), especially (2), anger (2), involved (2), through (2), clubs (2), country (2), lehigh (2), county (2), argument (2), according (2), reports (2), questions (2), answered (2), someone (2), give (2), choose (2), knows (2), pay (2), box (2), door (2), include (2), west (2), others (2), fact (2), mention (2), sense (2), history (2), rivers (2), power (2), favorites (2), hardscrabble (2), scufflegrit (2), drive (2), barely (2), living (2), miserable (2), each (2), perhaps (2), come (2), thursday (2), walk (2), park (2), painful (2), doo (2), war (2), general (2), wiped (2), savannah (2), house (2), legacy (2), william (2), birthright (2), boy (2), hid (2), died (2), gave (2), early (2), powerful (2), witch (2), broom (2), dorothy (2), fucking (2), situation (2), greeting (2), because (2), blessings (2), difficult (2), holding (2), six (2), hereafter (2), known (2), very (2), hoped (2), close (2), chez (2), inevitable (2), managed (2), feat (2), replacing (2), later (2), biggest (2), dang (2), happy (2), past (2), physical (2), led (2), diagnosis (2), career (2), spend (2), good (2), anyone (2), able (2), everything (2), mean (2), gift (2), wastage (2), concentrated (2), found (2), thank (2), spent (2), salt (2), outlet (2), suddenly (2), hobby (2), believe (2), surrounded (2), expressing (2), why (2), born (2), wife (2), melissa (2), jocelyn (2), culture (2), whose (2), community (2), member (2), synagogue (2), board (2), president (2), fjmc (2), chairman (2), congregation (2), canter (2), emmanuel (2), andrew (2), molleur (2), daniel (2), fort (2), aaron (2), morry (2), memorial (2), content, text, audio, original, works, otherwise, expressly, stated, licensed, copyright, prohibited, freely, non, credit, left, become, sole, property, media, anks, widespread, distribution, commons, footer, full, blown, boilerplate, mammal, moon, phases, lunacy, index, getcher, swag, recipes, whore, terror, zippy, timothy, mcsweeney, internet, tendency, meat, onion, lileks, hatrack, river, frank, zappa, fark, engrish, andy, jell, alamaailman, vasarat, monumental, verbatim, thebloggess, java, jive, sweasel, smokingtoaster, smitten, kitchen, scrine, sadly, rubinreports, robotchao, pajiba, notes, galilee, nina, neptunus, lex, minimally, invasive, manolo, shoe, limerick, savant, month, instapundit, parker, gunslinger, lot, copycats, gofugyourself, lerne, teche, geoffrey, chaucer, hath, fetch, flying, monkeys, eggagog, dooce, main, dilbert, dose, imagery, zucchini, bad, arglebargle, gourmet, agent, bedhead, mark, wall, logroll, xenogere, pebble, tools, renewal, trooper, gal, skwib, impolitic, further, captain, sql, firebird, suite, erin, brien, owner, manual, beings, duke, cutlass, tall, cool, drink, britches, stu, rss, socal, mom, schwartz, sisu, shorty, pjs, scheiss, weekly, sad, goth, hill, kudzu, postcards, hanging, pondering, passed, strange, return, jones, salty, neanderpundit, naked, villainy, cajun, american, opinionated, morris, musings, lollygaggin, speaks, keeskennis, journeys, restless, groanin, jock, indiana, baldilocks, blogroll, buddies, bitch, wiley, championship, bbq, voted, velociworld, treppenwitz, tim, reflection, connection, thrilling, yesteryear, omnibabe, podcast, slant, technicalities, tabs, supergurl, restroom, revelations, texas, yid, stop, nicole, wolverton, garden, moogies, baby, leslie, omnibus, laughing, holder, grouchy, cripple, greenville, card, elms, yard, drunken, wisdom, dog, walkin, boudicca, bobo, blogger, blackfive, bighominid, hairy, chasms, stupid, tommy, baboon, pirates, atwitter, bloggers, travels, nutty, sommelier, guild, 110, politics, schmolitics, pith, vinegar, perforated, headgear, 178, 102, 302, honored, guests, literature, archive, random, ten, flora, fauna, exceptional, talks, dadnis, 340, dic, animation, carnivalia, ask, categorically, lookin, passover, approaching, anticipating, matzoh, driven, constipation, carb, loading, joy, season, kasha, kosher, nostrils, sinuses, possess, vaginuses, observations, condition, painting, louis, wain, flash, distant, memory, encroaching, psychosis, indexed, stefan, stirs, prepare, shabbat, yesterday, group, congregated, synagogu, beanie, weenie, popular, 191, 289, 243, 279, 120, 101, dam, philistine, sacred, bard, affliction, hat, hail, mysterious, unraveling, turban, moist, dildo, cowtown, pattie, shakespeare, poop, jokes, grow, ain, right, totally, talents, insightful, sing, maniacal, obsessive, duck, heroes, stands, alone, really, whup, upside, haid, stranger, since, trademark, fedora, shem, tov, gadfrey, sir, character, telling, bound, astonishing, renaissance, newton, descartes, copernicus, larry, moe, curly, plethora, information, capitan, ivan, shreve, jim, kimberly, meryl, skippystalin, graham, sissy, willis, impressed, david, rahel, jaskow, montana, velociman, kim, kevin, laurence, simon, acidman, cast, characters, handmade, needle, felted, puppets, view, complete, profile, retired, drone, premier, colander, wanna, united, buried, crevices, brain, childhood, mush, decidedly, negative, connotation, experience, typical, quick, easy, intensive, meal, suited, lazy, weekend, snow, plenty, cereals, tear, packet, bingo, beneath, contempt, proper, takes, cerealic, delights, shall, hominy, alkali, treated, maize, category, themselves, doctored, tasty, components, sweetening, act, northerners, inexperienced, ignorant, grit, milled, popularly, sold, innocuous, nondescript, learned, wheaty, augmented, bit, sweetener, choice, proprietary, coarsely, invalids, toddler, throw, scallions, fish, maybe, chili, oil, passable, version, aka, ubiquitous, asian, america, fifteen, minutes, quicker, versions, available, tradeoff, loss, characteristic, delightful, nubbly, mouthfeel, expense, longer, introduced, spoonful, peanut, stirred, head, realm, semi, superannuated, blend, malted, barley, syrup, common, supermarket, item, liked, remember, ads, maple, flavored, oat, marky, voiced, insist, eternal, consternation, fan, mushy, local, superdupermarket, based, obvious, assertive, million, style, transports, sixty, favorite, myself, steeped, scented, irish, demerara, bob, try, maltex, chuk, congee, mri, unlike, experiences, consists, lying, uncomfortably, supine, shoved, narrow, tube, subjected, array, buzzing, clanging, whanging, sounds, edgard, varèse, proud, fun, objects, various, orifices, demonstrate, ability, nap, adverse, conditions, snooze, york, subways, hard, sleep, likened, bastard, offspring, casket, metallic, doughnut, points, rather, suppose, metaphysical, inverse, colonoscopy, sinfonia, magnetica, tuesday, medicare, grown, lurks, male, gross, shitblogging, functions, fluids, said, wax, fell, ear, chunk, english, pea, facility, holer, small, queue, formed, eventually, lady, waited, outside, hear, veritable, hiroshima, hawking, hacking, blowing, turn, obligatory, positioning, seat, protector, sat, whereupon, horrified, attention, pile, rope, feet, dunno, bout, leaving, wad, dropping, shower, unsure, action, pick, towel, discard, neither, fine, going, anywhere, nasty, equivalent, photographing, turd, dinner, plate, guilty, horrible, apparently, missus, earwax, cup, joe, effect, system, slow, savanna, bush, sun, provides, push, juice, keeps, innards, ticking, clock, suffering, block, times, must, run, limp, crimp, keep, plan, appalling, tidbit, pale, jaw, term, assuming, easily, astonished, set, stage, angered, actions, highways, douchebag, react, oaths, shouted, within, sealed, cabin, automobiles, outstretched, middle, provocative, circumstances, amount, risk, attached, outward, display, tempered, individuals, escalate, incidents, simple, stoplight, shouting, matches, windows, fist, fights, side, brained, tire, irons, golf, opening, fire, none, surprising, armed, increasingly, contentious, brings, kicks, notch, emeril, lagasse, bam, guys, cars, traffic, roadside, ensued, during, presumably, ending, mic, hells, naw, beg, angry, else, manage, logistics, unimaginable, convince, headed, stay, trou, fly, busy, interstate, quiet, lane, couple, follow, offending, laying, heh, blame, ibs, irritable, bowel, syndrome, warning, suspect, advantage, precedent, established, careful, calling, party, dispute, asshole, defecated, recent, pennsylvania, remedy, fee, awful, sick, trick, magic, count, cost, price, sale, tale, lock, troubled, procol, harum, robert, earworm, variant, corners, battle, plus, fifty, seventy, wikipedia, number, bearing, bridge, ferry, mill, legion, geography, area, numerous, historically, producing, flour, cloth, across, bridges, ferries, tunnels, learn, parts, often, named, sandy, springs, north, east, becomes, highway, driving, ones, oddball, short, digs, firm, dewey, howe, refers, barren, arable, eke, meager, impoverished, piss, poor, paved, gravel, turds, constructed, evokes, cloud, dirt, surrounding, popeye, bluto, engaged, beating, crusty, material, tyler, durden, practically, romantic, kinds, fascinating, farblondjet, nomenclature, find, damn, dives, disastrous, kept, start, attracting, sharks, certification, turning, horror, instead, err, expected, instructor, patient, suspected, patience, wearing, thin, hurry, understandable, pool, cleanup, bills, mounting, visit, gastrointerogist, confirmed, worst, fears, explosive, diarrhea, suffered, strapped, tank, mask, due, scuba, diverticulitis, swim, ruins, visitors, unaware, shocked, sepulchral, remains, metropolises, opposition, ahead, corridor, sea, merciless, somehow, fathers, prevailed, spare, nevertheless, between, coast, wilderness, building, wrapped, toilet, tecumseh, charmin, wednesday, daddy, looked, damned, stormtroopers, gonna, put, greasy, gloves, knew, hide, somethin, five, wore, dysentery, uncomfortable, hunk, metal, seven, sent, luke, skywalken, stood, trembling, wizard, chamber, promised, grant, wishes, returned, wicked, slain, albeit, inadvertently, gripped, alas, turned, fraud, nebraskan, huckster, borne, rogue, balloon, wailed, scarecrow, brains, tin, lion, courage, bronze, forget, kidney, hello, apologize, infrequency, late, aware, third, usual, unusual, suffice, wonderful, challenges, forrest, gump, bite, sits, grand, package, arrived, showed, veriest, doorstep, thanksgiving, chow, unable, accompanied, partner, lives, grandparents, status, achieve, gifted, major, change, twenty, pestering, yielded, pull, selling, closings, conducted, tap, dancing, huh, brilliant, maneuver, forever, grateful, persistence, successfully, removed, assortment, surprises, younger, referred, pulled, remarkable, marrying, seems, absolute, soul, mate, familiar, irrepressive, effervescent, unpredictable, stadium, cheering, conclusion, event, safely, broken, glass, commemorate, wedding, planner, plastic, death, star, elephant, discuss, noticing, ominous, symptoms, amyotrophic, lateral, sclerosis, lou, gehrig, squeeze, baseball, hit, sit, dictating, contents, received, case, freight, train, wear, breathing, machine, minute, immobile, limbs, virtually, cannot, stand, less, either, wheel, chair, bed, speech, reduced, whisper, point, journey, impossible, exact, table, cases, means, bet, kentucky, derby, 45th, college, reunion, attend, need, assistance, task, composing, unpleasant, silver, linings, important, renewed, appreciation, gives, survive, reason, tears, eyes, break, weakened, throat, acknowledge, relentless, gentle, constant, presence, foremost, caretaker, wouldn, gets, dictate, dropped, deteriorating, doing, herself, helped, largely, pointless, adventure, perversely, blessed, indeed, blessing, detritus, surround, glowing, bring, success, health, limit, hopefully, enjoy, hell, trip, ave, atque, vale, yours, wondrous, charges, forward, toward, unknown, hero, bids, farewell, interested, details, obituary, tomorrow, entertained, caring, adding, meaning, father, adulthood, working, spirit, gifts, artist, discovered, repository, warped, twisted, schtick, nuclear, rightly, proclaimed, exercises, fertile, space, mould, rich, internal, tremendous, stores, humorous, pieces, greatly, purpose, knowing, glad, generously, fearless, leader, hands, final, breaths, capture, articulate, loved, meeting, person, privilege, imagine, losing, published, journal, constitution, jan, evening, rapidly, lovingly, brooklyn, eli, bernice, formative, massapequa, baldwin, brothers, taught, stapled, thumb, built, pictures, graduated, cum, laude, 1974, bse, chemical, engineering, looking, uncannily, dustin, hoffman, graduate, plastics, toiling, petrochemical, industry, exxon, exxonmobil, eve, blind, date, 1975, girls, inherit, offbeat, artistic, impulses, fruitful, northeast, travelled, extensively, throughout, internationally, fueling, global, interesting, retirement, 2009, blossomed, invested, interests, fully, avid, culinary, abilities, rivaled, professionals, prolific, writer, blogs, ellison, vast, occasionally, wrote, dew, mcsweeny, blogging, became, source, becoming, irl, fellow, writers, heavily, attended, subsequent, bagelicious, gabai, federation, serving, chapter, anshei, darom, region

Text of the page (random words):
love that arrived in november and showed up at our veriest doorstep on thanksgiving day just as we were about to chow down being unable to drive her own self she was accompanied by elder daughter and elder daughter s partner hereafter known as e man so there s something very new in our lives dee and i are actual grandparents a status we had always hoped to achieve and were gifted with before the year s close another major change after almost twenty years at chez elisson marietta we are now living nine miles up the road in chez elisson woodstock after several years of pestering on dee s part i finally yielded to the inevitable early in 2018 we managed to pull off the amazing feat of both selling our old house and replacing it with a much more size appropriate town home with the closings being conducted on the same morning how about that for tap dancing huh it was a brilliant maneuver for which i am forever grateful to dee and her persistence we now have successfully removed most of our old crap replacing it with a whole assortment of new crap but more about that later one of the biggest surprises was that my sweet younger brother the other elisson hereafter to be referred to in these pages as uncle dang has pulled off the remarkable feat of marrying someone who not only seems to be his absolute soul mate but who also may be familiar to those who read these pages the irrepressive effervescent erica sherman this perhaps is one of the amazing and unpredictable events of 2018 despite the fact that uncle dang has had a whole stadium of people cheering him on to this happy and inevitable conclusion think of it by the time you read this the happy event will be safely in the past with a broken glass to commemorate the occasion if i were the wedding planner we might have used a plastic death star but let that go but now we have the elephant in the room to discuss in march of this year i began noticing some ominous physical symptoms which led to a diagnosis of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis als at least lou gehrig managed to squeeze a baseball career out of life before being hit with this shit but not this boy as i sit here dictating the contents of this post to you it is almost exactly six months after having received my diagnosis and my case has been moving like a freight train i wear a breathing machine almost every minute i am almost completely immobile my limbs being virtually useless i cannot stand up much less walk i spend all of my days either in a power wheel chair or in my bed my speech is reduced to a whisper at this point in my journey i ve been under 24 hour care several of the past weeks and while it s impossible to know the exact time table in cases like this it means it s a good bet that i won t be at the fucking kentucky derby next year nor at my 45th college reunion which is something i actually had hoped to attend i need assistance for every task i do including writing and composing this post having als is a very unpleasant situation but it does carry with it a few silver linings one of the most important is that it has given me a renewed appreciation for my family and friends and anyone who gives care to others without them i could not survive nor would there be a reason to it s with tears in my still alert eyes and a break in my weakened throat that i acknowledge the relentless gentle and constant presence of my first and foremost caretaker my mistress of sarcasm without whom i wouldn t be able to do anything this is where it gets difficult to dictate these posts because she is the one who has to write them she dropped everything to come down here and spend every day of her life with her deteriorating old man of course the mistress of sarcasm is not doing this all by herself she has been helped by elder daughter and dee the latter of whom this whole bloggy exercise would have largely been a miserable and pointless adventure i am in this way perversely blessed but it is indeed a blessing the things the physical detritus mean nothing to me now but family as they surround me with their glowing love they mean everything and you my esteemed readers who have given me the gift of self aggrandizement and useless time wastage for all of these years you do too may this next year bring you all the blessings of success and health that you care to have all without limit to any good thing hopefully i will be around to enjoy some of them with you but if i am not know that it was a hell of a trip posted by elisson at 9 50 pm 10 comments labels miscellaneous rants mushpucker occasions stories email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest friday august 3 2018 great and powerful a 100 word story the friends stood trembling before the great door of the wizard s audience chamber oz the great and powerful had promised to grant them their wishes once they had returned but only if they brought with them the wicked witch s broom dorothy had slain the witch albeit inadvertently she gripped the broom alas oz turned out to be a fraud a nebraskan huckster borne to oz in a rogue balloon dorothy wailed she d never get home nor would the scarecrow get brains the tin man a heart and the lion courage and the bronze man could forget about his fucking kidney posted by elisson at 6 28 pm 3 comments labels 100 word stories email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest thursday july 19 2018 the legacy obi wan kenobi the way your daddy looked at it that lightsaber was your birthright and he d be damned if any stormtroopers were gonna put their greasy white gloves on his boy s birthright so he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide somethin his ass five long years he wore this lightsaber up his ass then when he died of dysentery he gave me the lightsaber i hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass for two years then after seven years i was sent home to my family and now little man i give the lightsaber to you luke skywalken the early years posted by elisson at 4 31 pm 1 comments labels narrischkeit pop cultcha stories email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest wednesday july 11 2018 wiped out a 100 word war story atlanta lay in ruins visitors to the city who had been unaware of the war would have been shocked to see the sepulchral remains of what had been one of the great metropolises of the south the general had wiped out all opposition now ahead of him lay the corridor to savannah his march to the sea would be merciless somehow the savannah city fathers prevailed upon him to spare their beautiful town nevertheless between the coast and atlanta lay a white wilderness every house every building was completely wrapped in toilet paper the legacy of general william tecumseh charmin posted by elisson at 2 04 pm 1 comments labels 100 word stories email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest monday july 9 2018 deep doo doo a 100 word story damn thought charlie three dives each with the same disastrous results if this kept up he would start attracting sharks getting his certification was turning out to be a horror show instead of the walk err swim in the park he d expected it to be his instructor was patient but charlie suspected that that patience would be wearing thin in a big hurry understandable too the pool cleanup bills were mounting a visit to the gastrointerogist confirmed his worst fears the painful explosive diarrhea he suffered every time he strapped on his tank and mask was due to scuba diverticulitis posted by elisson at 8 20 pm 2 comments labels 100 word stories i ve got a secretion email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest thursday july 5 2018 what yet another blog yes yet another blog you can find it here posted by elisson at 9 58 pm 0 comments labels blodging and blodgers i see dead people miscellaneous rants email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest friday june 22 2018 on atlanta road nomenclature everybody knows about atlanta roads all of their names include some variant of peachtree peachtree street west peachtree street peachtree corners peachtree parkway peachtree battle plus at least fifty others there are in fact seventy one roads here with some mention of peachtree in their names according to wikipedia the number of roads bearing mention of some sort of bridge ferry or mill are also legion this makes perfect sense given the both the geography and history of the area you have numerous rivers which historically were used to power mills for producing flour or cloth and to get across those rivers you needed bridges and ferries tunnels not so much another thing you learn about roads in these parts is that they re often named for where they take you for example there are two different roswell roads one in sandy springs that goes north south and one in marietta that is mostly east west they ll both take you to roswell and the same road that s called roswell road in marietta becomes wait for it marietta highway when you get to roswell if you don t know about this you can get completely farblondjet lost when driving here but my favorites are the ones with the oddball names names like trickum road hardscrabble road and one of my personal favorites scufflegrit road all three are just a short drive from our new digs in woodstock trickum that s a great name for a road it s also a great name for a law firm dewey trickum and howe i would love to know more about the history of that road and how it got that name hardscrabble another great name the word refers to a place that is barren barely arable and where one can barely eke out a meager living impoverished piss poor miserable you d think a road by that name would be paved with gravel and turds this one is not but may have been when it was first constructed scufflegrit this word evokes images of the cloud of dirt surrounding popeye and bluto as they are engaged in beating the shit out of each other or perhaps the crusty material on tyler durden s face it s practically romantic come to atlanta we have all kinds of fascinating roads for you to go get lost on posted by elisson at 2 20 pm 1 comments labels miscellaneous rants email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest today s earworm doctor where s your remedy i ve got enough to pay the fee can t you see i m awful sick i ll pay you well to do the trick doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor doctor where s your magic box there s no one here to count the cost name your price and make the sale there s no one here to tell the tale doctor doctor doctor please don t lock your door i ve never troubled you before just a pinch to ease the pain i ll never trouble you again doctor doctor just a pinch to ease the pain i ll never trouble you again just a pinch to ease the pain i ll never trouble you again procol harum robert s box posted by elisson at 1 27 pm 0 comments labels miscellaneous rants pop cultcha email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest friday june 15 2018 road rage brought to a whole new level every once in a while in these days of ever more appalling events there comes along a little news tidbit that is so far beyond the pale that it causes even my jaw to drop and my long term esteemed readers assuming any of you are still around know that i am not easily astonished let s set the stage many of us probably all of us have at one time or another been angered by the actions of other drivers on our public highways let s face it pretty much everyone on the road is a douchebag except for you and me many of us will react with a few vile oaths shouted within the sealed cabin of our automobiles or even an outstretched middle finger in especially provocative circumstances but there is always a certain amount of risk attached to an outward display of anger when especially hot tempered individuals are involved anger can escalate into an actual road rage incident such incidents can range from simple stoplight shouting matches through open windows to fist fights on the side of the road to people getting brained with tire irons or golf clubs to drivers opening fire on one other none of this should be surprising in a well armed and increasingly contentious country and yet a recent incident in lehigh county pennsylvania brings road rage to an entirely new level kicks it up a notch in the words of emeril lagasse bam yes lehigh county where two guys got out of their cars after one cut the other off in traffic a roadside argument ensued during which according to the news reports one of the drivers defecated on the other presumably ending the argument mic drop hells naw deuce drop so many questions beg to be answered just how angry do you have to be for you to take a shit on someone else how does one manage the logistics it s unimaginable that one could convince a hot headed driver to stay still long enough so that one could drop trou and let fly on him did the incident take place on a busy interstate or a quiet country lane a couple of these questions are answered by follow up news reports which have the offending driver laying heh blame on his ibs irritable bowel syndrome you d think that he d give the other guy a warning but i suspect he took advantage of an opportunity so now that the precedent has been established be careful about calling another driver to whom you are party in a dispute an asshole he just might choose to show you that he has one and he knows how to use it posted by elisson at 10 57 am 2 comments labels current events i ve got a secretion email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest sunday june 10 2018 mister coffee they call me mister coffee cause coffee helps me go whenever there s a job to do mister coffee makes it so the first thing every morning i have my cup of joe its effect upon my system is anything but slow i take my coffee with me in savanna or in bush and when the morning sun comes up it provides that needed push my go juice keeps my innards a ticking like a clock i m never ever suffering from any kind of block those times a big job must be done mister coffee is your man i ll run not limp to drop or crimp and keep you on your plan they call me mister coffee cause coffee helps me go whenever there s a job to do mister coffee makes it so posted by elisson at 8 56 pm 1 comments labels vile doggerel email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest saturday may 26 2018 there are limits even for me despite my being old enough for medicare i am like most grown men in that there lurks inside me a prepubescent male with a prepubescent way of finding humor in gross things i have done my share of shitblogging i have written sonnets yes sonnets about bodily functions and fluids i have gone so far as to write a post about my own earwax when said wax fell out of my ear in the form of a chunk the size of an english pea all of this is revolting sure but eve...