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i m only cryptic and machiavellian i m only cryptic and machiavellian cheshirecatclub cheshire cat club cece 20s she her home ask archive tracking tag likes hi i m cece this is my corner for stories mostly joel miller soft mornings filthy nights domesticity as guilty pleasure faith guilt desire ordinary love made extraordinary about me ๋ ࣭ ๋ ࣭ she her not a native english speaker long time reader learning to share again writes tenderness like it s survival obsessed with intimacy in all its shapes domestic filthy complicated will always find a way to put pancakes peaches or prayer beads in a fic masterlist every story all in one place reblogs comments little heart emojis unhinged keysmashes all welcome here thank you for reading thank you for finding me thank you for letting joel miller ruin you too 21 august 2025 0 tags like reblog cc stories wordsbycc netherfeildren fear of god masterlist artwork is the goldfinch by carel fabritius pairing joel miller x ofc summary what was monstrousness what was it but a certainty that there existed within you multitudes of desires needs guilts impulses humanity at the end of the world when the dust has finally settled joel grapples with what it is to take hold of your own monstrosity your own humanity and live with it and what it is to bear that truth in the palm of your hand held towards the person you love offer it to them and have it be accepted for what it was courage above all else it is courage that is necessary to go on or big bad joel miller falls in love and doesn t know how to deal with it rating explicit 18 content age gap smut angst grief ptsd canon typical violence discussions of medical procedures illness emotional unavailability pregnancy word count 55k read on ao3 chapter i i dreamt that time had ended chapter ii although a monster joel could be charming in company chapter iii your bitter heart heals my heart chapter iv mouth full of blood chapter v love humiliates you chapter vi the indignity of suffering chapter vii for before chapter viii the fisher king chapter ix what should we believe in next epilogue birdie birdie s house extras did the loneliness die that night summary birdie and joel s first time i am a lantern summary birdie realizes she s pregnant joel summary writing exercise not part of canon story line joel passes away my whole life summary the family celebrates joel s birthday updates blog follow and turn on notifications for new writing fog companion playlists apple music spotify this is not only a compilation of songs that reminded me of the story but also songs i listened to over and over again during my writing process 4 may 2026 1031 like reblog geopsych a walk to the park yesterday 5 april 2026 1243 like reblog weltenwellen wildness before something sublime leila chatti 5 april 2026 8373 like reblog letsbelonelytogetherr friedrich nietzsche thus spoke zarathustra 5 april 2026 3687 like reblog inasunlitroom so hold me close honey say you re forever mine 5 april 2026 68 like reblog metamorphesque james baldwin they can t turn back 5 april 2026 39693 like reblog inasunlitroom i think i m gonna love you for a long long time 1 april 2026 285 like reblog elliespuns 1 april 2026 73 like reblog kosmogrl 31 march 2026 18587 like reblog mybvalentine he is just too fucking beautiful he would be sooooo sick of me oh my god credit augvstus on pinterest 10 march 2026 663 like reblog prev next suburban theme by mournstera