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Text of the page (random words):
ion dir michael peter spierig 25 the skeleton twins dir craig johnson 24 life itself dir steve james 23 young ones dir jake paltrow 22 the interview dir evan goldberg seth rogen 21 top five dir chris rock 20 the overnighters dir jesse moss 19 white bird in a blizzard dir gregg araki 18 laggies dir lynn shelton 17 pride dir matthew warchus 16 young beautiful dir francois ozon 15 the drop dir michael roskam 14 the blue room dir mathieu almaric 13 milius dir joey figueroa zak knutson 12 chef dir jon favreau 11 nymphomaniac dir lars von trier 10 the dance of reality dir alejandro jodorowsky 9 a girl walks home alone at night dir ana lily amirpour 8 ida dir pawel pawlikowski 7 like father like son dir hirokazu koreeda 6 why don t you play in hell dir shion sono 5 joe dir david gordon green 4 wrong cops dir quentin dupieux 3 the grand budapest hotel dir wes anderson 2 boyhood dir richard linklater 1 birdman dir alejandro gonzalez inarritu posted by thomas duke at 1 31 am no comments labels top 30 favorite films of 2014 tuesday february 17 2015 science team 2014 if i understand neil degrasse tyson correctly science is the balls without it we would all be neanderthals stumbling around an untamed earth leading an aimless pointless existence bereft of katy perry blasting ipods beer cans that change color based on temperature and of course the meat dehydrator that marvelous invention of science that allows one to be able to make beef jerky at home without the hassle and judging eye of society when one takes a trip to the supermarket in order to buy nothing but outlandish amounts of beef jerky however people have taken advantage of the buildup of goodwill that has resulted from the fruits of science and technology take for example scientology it gets the rub from the smartiness of science by putting the word science in its title in order to fool people into thinking that it s not like the dumbest thing ever another such group is science team oh sure science team is nowhere near as illegitimate as some religion invented to line the pockets of a shitty sci fi novelist but after watching this movie i have come to the conclusion that this particular team of science is not purely rooted in the spirit of the self critical pursuit of knowledge they re a group that utilizes public and government funding in order to indeed tackle the problem of invading aliens and such but something is askew for example the science teamers in training are all hot bored young ladies who perpetually do calisthenics while wearing matching t shirts and shorts leading me to believe that president and crippled nutbagger dick willington iii is partially using science team as a front to realize his dream of overseeing an all girl pseudo sleepaway camp where everyone is perpetually doing an aubrey plaza impersonation i can t say i blame him instead of an aubrey plaza impersonation here is aubrey plaza impersonating it s the best i can do anyway angry douchebag joey is in charge of field operations for science team an interstellar diplomat in charge of extraterrestrial inquiry he is the type of diplomat that inquires of an alien s purpose for visiting earth by swearing at them at the top of his lungs and saying things like do not fuck with me without provocation one gets the feeling that joey spent less time in high school innovating in the chemistry lab and more time knocking lunch trays out of the hands of dweebs nevertheless he convinced an insane cripple to hire him and like many a corporate stooge his only real skill is confidence h is approach to diplomacy ultimately proves ineffective with the alien as you might imagine and this leads to people bleeding from their heads coupled with the tragedy of gamebreaking scientific knowledge slipping through the hands of humanity on account of cock fueled antisocial bureaucracy on the flipside is our hero chip a struggling writer who deals with his literary impotence with anger and yelling and breaking things one gets the feeling that chip was the kind of guy in high school that attempted to write the most epic poem ever during his lunch hour but some jock came by and knocked his lunch tray over and ruined his composition book in the process and chip has vowed ever since to skullfuck the world with his words the skullfucking hasn t gone as well as he had hoped so he takes the frustration for his failures out on his passive girlfriend and destroys everything in their living room chip ditches her and tries to move in with his mom acting like his girlfriend has given him no choice but to enter in the most desperate living situation imaginable despite doing nothing but sitting on the couch and eating from a giant tub of ice cream his plan of rethinking his approach to writing while watching japanese tentacle porn in his boyhood room goes astray when he finds his mom s headless corpse and a blobby alien that just sits around it stands to reason that the immobile blob alien and the headless mother are interrelated somehow but to what extent is part of the plot that chip seeks to unravel joey and his hazmat underlings eventually find their way into the home of chip s mom to investigate as mtv s the real world has taught us two angry douchebags cannot stay in the same house together for any significant length of time which means that chip and joey are headed to an inevitable showdown in this case it s a knock out drag out we can t have sex so we ll just fuck punch each other tussle of epic and deadly proportions while hero and villain on the surface ultimately chip and joey are two sides of the same angry repressed male coin the main source of scorn for both are passive entities a girl and an alien probably because they both don t actively placate the respective egos of chip and joey and instead have the gall to just sit there and kind of ignore them rather than being a nonstop troma fest of exploding heads and one liners and exploding tits science team takes the time to show how the two main characters react to the various situations with angry unhinged gusto however unsympathetic they may be this is punctuated with cronenberg esque bodily violence lines like i made you toast and you go and have sex with donald and side characters like the cop who screams in horror about how much less pussy he ll get with a melted off face as his face is melting off the humor comes more from the characters being themselves rather than necessarily some forced titty pun like you might expect it s just that the world of science team is a patriarch of angry douchebaggery fused with cutting edge interstellar technology and it s only natural that a combination like that would lead to a clusterfuck of swearing and melting body parts instead of the actual pursuit of real knowledge or whatever p s director writer drew bolduc was previously responsible for the taint posted by thomas duke at 4 09 am no comments labels science team 2014 older posts home subscribe to posts atom warning spoilers warning spoilers warning spoilers you think it s okay to ruin the movie gag me with a spoon followers subscribe posts atom posts all comments atom all comments features favorite films of the 2000s gifs lazy baker halloween horror countdown 2010 lazy baker halloween horror countdown 2011 lazy baker halloween horror countdown 2012 let kermode do the work for you movies i wanna see project terrible rare westerns on instant watch project top 10 favorite films of 2009 top 10 favorite films of 2010 top 10 willy inducing moments top 100 favorite films top 20 favorite horror films top 30 favorite films of 2011 top 30 favorite films of 2012 top 30 favorite films of 2013 top 30 favorite films of 2014 reviews 2001 a space odyssey 1968 2069 a sex odyssey 1974 40 pounds of trouble 1962 9 1 2 weeks 1986 a dozen ways to die 1990 a necessary death 2008 a woman s secret 1949 aberration 1997 accidents 1989 adventures of ford fairlane 1990 adventures of thunderstorm return of thor 2011 alien outlaw 1985 alone in the dark 1982 american nightmare 1983 angst 1983 april story 1998 are you in the house alone 1978 area 407 2012 baby blues 2008 baby brown 1990 bad dreams 1988 bad manners 1984 beat the devil 1953 ben arthur 2002 berzerker 1987 beyond the black rainbow 2010 beyond the grave 2010 big money rustlas 2010 black roses 1988 blood frenzy 1987 blood hook 1986 blood sisters 1987 blood tracks 1985 blood on satan s claw 1971 bloodrayne the third reich 2010 bloody birthday 1981 blubberella 2011 body count 1987 brian s song 1971 broken arrow 1950 c me dance 2009 cheerleader camp 1988 child of the sabbat 1989 chopping mall 1986 cold prey 2006 combat shock 1984 coyote summer 1996 crystal heart 1986 cult of the damned 1969 curse of the doll people 1961 curtains 1983 cutting class 1989 dead cert 2010 dead girls 1990 dead undead 2010 deadly games 1982 deadly intruder 1985 deadly manor 1990 death bed the bed that eats 1977 deviation 1971 devil times five 1974 diary of a bachelor 1964 diary of a high school bride 1959 dillinger is dead 1969 divine enforcer 1992 don t go in the woods 1981 dorm that dripped blood 1982 drop dead fred 1991 edge of the axe 1988 elevator 2011 elves 1989 evil laugh 1988 extraterrestrial 2011 fake out 1982 fatal games 1984 fatal pulse 1988 feeding grounds 2006 final exam 1981 final terror 1983 forbidden world 1982 frankenstein meets the wolf man 1943 friday the 13th 1980 from beyond 1986 frozen 2010 ghost warrior 1986 giant claw 1957 girls of pleasure island 1953 girls school screamers 1984 good luck chuck 2007 good for nothing 2011 good time girl 1948 halloween 1978 happy birthday to me 1981 hell night 1981 hellbound 1994 hide and go shriek 1988 hills have eyes part 2 1985 hisss 2010 home sweet home 1981 honeymoon horror 1982 horrors of spider island 1960 hospital massacre 1982 house of death 1982 house of the devil 2009 house on sorority row 1983 human centipede first sequence 2009 humanoids from the deep 1980 humongous 1982 i married a monster from outer space 1958 i saw the devil 2010 i spit on your grave 1978 iced 1988 impulse 1974 inception 2010 initiation 1984 initiation of sarah 1978 innocent prey 1984 inquisition 1976 intruder 1989 it rains in my village 1968 it s alive 1974 jack and the beanstalk 2010 jingle all the way 1996 just before dawn 1981 kick ass 2010 killer party 1986 killer workout 1986 killing spree 1987 klown 2010 la guerrera vengadora 1988 la rose de fer 1973 last riders 1992 last slumber party 1987 lawnmower man 1992 leatherface texas chainsaw massacre iii 1990 legion of iron 1990 looker 1981 love exposure 2008 mademoiselle 1966 man bites dog 1992 masque of the red death 1991 maximum conviction 2012 mazes and monsters 1982 memorial valley massacre 1988 metropolis 1984 metta meta gakido koza 1971 moonstalker 1989 mortuary 1983 mountaintop motel massacre 1986 murders in the zoo 1933 my bloody valentine 1981 nightmare 1981 nail gun massacre 1985 never pick up a stranger 1979 new year s evil 1980 night school 1981 nightmare in wax 1969 ninja s creed 2009 nocturna 1979 oddballs 1984 offerings 1989 onibaba 1964 out of bounds 1986 over the top 1987 penumbra 2011 perfect sense 2011 phobia 1980 pledge night 1990 poolboy drowning out the fury 2011 pretty smart 1987 prison heat 1993 prom night 1980 psycho cop 1989 punk vacation 1987 rape squad 1974 razortooth 2007 red badge of courage 1951 red house 1947 reflections in a golden eye 1967 report to the commissioner 1975 return of the family man 1989 return to horror high 1987 robot monster 1953 rock n roll nightmare 1987 rocktober blood 1984 rodan 1956 roller blade 1986 runaway nightmare 1982 rush week 1991 santa s slay 2005 satan s blade 1984 satan s storybook 1989 scalps 1983 science team 2014 scott pilgrim vs the world 2010 seven ups 1973 shadows run black 1986 shame of patty smith 1962 shower of blood 2004 showgirls 1995 shutter island 2010 siete en la mira 1984 silent madness 1984 silent night deadly night 1984 silent scream 1980 skullduggery 1983 slaughter high 1986 slaughtered vomit dolls 2006 sleepaway camp 1983 slumber party massacre 1982 slumber party massacre ii 1987 slumber party massacre iii 1990 snow white and the huntsman 2012 snow white a deadly summer 2012 sorority girl 1957 sorority house massace 1986 sorority house massacre ii 1990 source code 2011 spiderhole 2010 splice 2009 spymate 2006 stage fright 1980 stagefright 1987 strange intruder 1956 suicide girls must die 2010 supergirl 1984 sweet 16 1983 tainted image 1991 taintlight 2009 take the money and run 1969 terror train 1980 terror on tour 1980 the funhouse 1981 the accused 1988 the bleeding 2009 the burning 1981 the church 1989 the commune 2009 the crazy never die 1988 the forest 1982 the hole 2009 the last circus 2010 the prey 1984 the prowler 1981 the road 2009 the slayer 1982 the taint 2010 the unseen 1980 theatre bizarre 2011 they saved hitler s brain 1968 things 1989 to all a good night 1980 toolbox murders 1978 trick or treat 1986 turkish star wars 1982 twice dead 1988 twilight 2008 twisted nightmare 1987 under the flag of the rising sun 1972 unhinged 1982 unwed mother 1958 valhalla rising 2009 vampegeddon 2010 vampire boys 2011 video diary of a lost girl 2012 we re going to eat you 1980 week end 1967 welcome to spring break 1988 whodunit 1982 wicker tree 2010 without warning 1980 wizards of the lost kingdom ii young guns ii 1990 youth in revolt 2009 zombie nightmare 1986 zone 39 1996 archive april 1 february 1 january 1 july 1 may 1 february 1 december 1 november 2 october 2 august 1 july 2 june 3 may 3 april 2 march 3 february 3 january 2 december 2 november 4 october 12 september 6 august 8 july 8 june 7 may 6 april 6 march 10 february 8 january 6 december 6 november 6 october 18 september 13 august 15 july 22 june 8 may 8 april 5 march 10 february 14 january 15 december 15 november 5 october 19 september 15 august 9 july 17 june 30 may 6 profile thomas duke how easy it would be to wade among the bushes and lie face down in the warm water till oblivion came there would be a certain gurgling or choking unpleasantness at first but it would soon be over then the long peaceful night of non existence what i had enjoyed from the mythical start of eternity till the 20th of august 1890 more and more i looked at the river on drowsy sun golden summer afternoons i liked to think of the beauty of the sun and blue river and green shores and distant white steeple as enfolding me at the last it would be as if the element of mystical cosmic beauty were dissolving me and yet certain elements notably scientific curiosity and a sense of world drama held me back much in the universe baffled me yet i knew i could pry the answers out of books if i lived and studied longer things have learned to walk that ought to crawl view my complete profile follow me on tumblr my article in paracinema magazine a few like review sites or whatever 10k bullets av maniacs bleeding skull canuxploitation critical condition dvd beaver dvd drive in hysteria liv...