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august 2009 my scar smiles at me i don t always smile back my scar smiles at me i don t always smile back menu skip to content home about blogs that draw me back and back again favorite posts timeline month august 2009 august 14 2009 by circlesbecomeme hope i have returned from my scouting mission to italy i know more now and that has made the decision even harder i also have more clarity about just how much my heart is struggling to give up on my dream of being a mother now in my little cottage in new zealand while working part time at my mother friendly workplace but i must move on and i am finding hope in the most unexpected places there is nothing to say that i can t be a mother or that i won t be able to parent in new zealand but it is not going to be this year i think i can learn to deal with that and i need to be gentler with myself for the reality that i am still not 100 okay with the fact that my time is not now posted in finding my way 3 comments archives december 2015 july 2015 september 2014 august 2014 july 2014 june 2014 may 2014 april 2014 march 2014 february 2014 january 2014 december 2013 november 2013 october 2013 june 2013 march 2013 january 2013 december 2012 november 2012 october 2012 september 2012 august 2012 june 2012 may 2012 april 2012 march 2012 february 2012 january 2012 december 2011 october 2011 september 2011 june 2011 may 2011 november 2010 august 2010 july 2010 may 2010 april 2010 march 2010 february 2010 january 2010 december 2009 november 2009 october 2009 september 2009 august 2009 july 2009 june 2009 may 2009 april 2009 march 2009 february 2009 january 2009 december 2008 november 2008 october 2008 september 2008 august 2008 july 2008 june 2008 may 2008 april 2008 march 2008 february 2008 january 2008 august 2009 s m t w t f s 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 jul sep 12 in 12 2012 age anxiety bad day bad days bcp beta blogging celebrations clinics color community contrasts cycle 1 cycle 2 cycle 3 de decision making dogs donor egg donor eggs dreaming of sleep dreams encouragement family finding my way flowers friends goals good days gratitude grief hard days healing health holidays home hope hrt illness italy joy loss marking time music negative new beginnings nz old times sake one project project other people s kids photos piano piano questions reflecting relatives remembering resolutions rowing sad days sharing shifting perspectives show tell show and tell silence spain support the good side photos thesis try 2 updates where is home words worry create a free website or blog at wordpress com subscribe subscribed my scar smiles at me i don t always smile back sign me up already have a wordpress com account log in now privacy my scar smiles at me i don t always smile back subscribe subscribed sign up log in report this content view site in reader manage subscriptions collapse this bar loading comments write a comment email name website design a site like this with wordpress com get started