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Text of the page (random words):
more often sent a company out to a locked apartment complex that is specifically for physically challenged individuals since most are in wheelchairs it is inaccessible to most people the apt bldg has a knox box a key that is locked in a box that we can unlock the box from dispatch with a code but the fire truck needs to be in proximity of it i hear on a channel reserved for knox box engine 3 please unlock box my partner hits the knox box then it s engine 3 um can you hit it again it s all stiff in there what my partner hits knox box engine 3 to dispatch can you hit it again it s like all hard and stuck whoo well ok finally engine 3 can you start another company to come help maybe it wont be hard for them by now oh you don t want to know the images that were going thru my mind i start another company engine 7 make the assignment with engine 3 for lift assistance engine 3 will be outside the bldg requesting assistance with getting the knox box open after a minute i hear engine 7 engine 3 is requesting what um engine 7 engine 3 is requesting assistance in getting the knox box open engine 7 just what is the problem again oh boy here we go engine 7 engine 3 is advising they are um unable to open the knox box engine 7 what do you mean unable engine 7 engine 3 advises they are unable to open the knox box cuz it s all stiff and stuck in there insert hysterical laughing here engine 7 copies a minute later engine 3 you can cancel engine 7 it s not stiff anymore we took care of it ourselves i promise people i am not kidding elaborating or prevaricating posted by dispatchdiva at 3 44 pm 1 comment thursday july 12 2007 something about moo refer to previous post please ok now that you know what kind of night i had i was getting ready to log out go to bed and got the biggest tickle i have an 18 mo old purebred german shepherd he was abused as a pup and given to me when he was 8 months old his registered name is something stupid apollo third rock from the sun i just call him something equally stupid moo have you ever seen a shepherd pup try to chew a tennis ball and a nylabone at the same time trust me hilarious i ve been trying to work with him to be less timid seems to be better at times but he d still rather run and hide than look at a stranger with all the fireworks lately i m a bit tired of having him run up to me stick his head between my legs and quiver no jokes please i m aware of what that sounds like anyway any other dog specially our trained k9 s no way no how would i get on my knees and take something from them this one not so smart he cocks his head perks his ears lets go of both toys and licks my ear oh boy yea for me i get a wet willie from a dog so much for me playing with him poor boy just doesn t know how and still thinks if i take something he s been bad i tried playing fetch with him several months ago throwing a 15 inch stick across the yard we don t do that anymore graceful there slides in the wet grass and somehow impales himself in the groin i can see all the men that may read this crossing their legs in empathatic pain now yes one vet visit and 200 00 later my moo is no longer sportin wood bigger than shepherds are supposed to the stake somehow managed to almost go straight thru him almost out his back yet missed every single vital organ god bless that dog and his pound puppy sister moira a scottie schnauzer mix i affectionately call a schnottie on my worst days without trying they never fail to make me laugh posted by dispatchdiva at 7 57 am 2 comments i love my job i love my job i love my job after being off for 9 days 5 of which i was stuck in bed with a fever i left home last night looking forward to going back to work until i got there i only deal with the citizens about 12 hrs or so a month being mainly a dispatcher last night i got 8 full wonderful enlightening hours with them insert sarcastic comments various cuss words here first night back i get called the big ol fat c word yeah that helps just cuz this particular rhodes scholar doesn t like little things like rules or laws even contrary to popular belief even in oklahoma we don t go bustin down doors to get your drug money back sorry so sad for you on the other hand i d be more than happy sir to send my officers to check your tweakin behind for paraphenalia stolen property and or vehicles if you wish i didn t think so in the words of some of my brit relatives sod off you bleeding wanker and of course we have the magna cum laude from mit and his equally intelligent roommate that called in about someone throwing a molotov cocktail at their house now not actually being from oklahoma okies still stymie me at times is it taught is it instinct or is it just another jackass wanna be that says hey lets go pick this flaming bottle of gasoline up and look at it i really don t have to say it but say it i will yes it blew up in the faces of our rocket scientists luckily for them maybe not so for any future progeny it didn t seriously hurt either one of them a bit of hair singed a small spot of burn and blister on one s cheek didn t i mention something about the lord and watching over fools ah well to balance the idiots i also got a few thank yous rare though they are they go a long way to counteract the homicidal thoughts ahem i mean the gracious and loving thoughts that i have about our lovely citizens within a minute of the c word incident i got a very nice elderly lady who just wanted an officer to drive down her street when it s convenient dear no hurry her street lights were out and she was just a bit nervous due to several recent burglaries in the neighborhood ok no problem part of the service she told me that i was a dear child and to be sure to thank the wonderful officers for taking care of the old people awww how sweet is that i started out the night gritting my teeth i love my job i love my job i love my job but after that sweet elderly lady and a couple of others yes i can honestly say i love my job posted by dispatchdiva at 7 31 am 1 comment wednesday july 11 2007 i don t know everything no really i ve been off for a week with pneumonia yes in july and apparently my kids miss me while this makes me feel good that someone does i have yet to convince some of them that i really don t have all the info on everything that goes on in the city it s bad enough that my 18 mo old shepherd won t leave my side even go outside to the bathroom unless i escort him but these are officers with phones tv internet etc i mean c mon people calling me while i m running a fever of 102 to find out who was the latest officer involved in a wreck you can call dispatch as easily as i can ok ok i know they are used to getting their info from me even when i m not working their side of town i get laptop messages all the time asking what is officer so and so s badge number what is this officer s days off etc no biggie they trust me we have some newer less experienced dispatchers working our service channel i get it i did finally drag myself out of bed monday night to hang out with a couple of the boys at first i heard the how are you doings wondering where you ve been missed you kinda stuff then 30 seconds later it starts so i have a question for you yesterday it was a text message did you hear about the 2 officers sent to the hospital one possibly with a broken jaw and concussion do you know who it is can you find out i called in to dispatch got the info text back another happy customer i m not sure if i should start logging in at work as encyclopedia brittanica dear abby or mom and i wonder why i m single posted by dispatchdiva at 7 46 pm no comments saturday july 7 2007 loolooloooloooollooooolooooooo friday night in the big city yeah ok so less than half a mil but big for around here and i send two officers on a domestic disturbance with a mental patient hubby calls in cuz his wife is goin round the bend off her meds etc hubby tells my calltaker that wife is nekkid standing in the middle of the bed turning circles shouting that she s married to the devil oh yeah and she s on her period now i don t care for one of the officers that i ve sent but it s my job to protect them and i advise them to use universal precautions in other words hey kids glove up the night goes swimmingly on i m on the phone with a cpl about something else when all of a sudden i hear over the radio looolooolooolooloooloooooo and a male voice trying to speak in there somewhere picture a hyper female yodeler and you might come close it was the officer trying to tell me that he was taking the female to the county mental health facility for evaluation unfortunately every time he keyed up all i heard was her loooloooloooloolooolooo he finally had to send me a message on the laptop before i could understand what he was trying to tell me when he was done checking her in i asked him if she was doing her linda blair exorcist imitation he sent back a message saying yes and he d fetch me anything i wanted coffee chocolate etc if i never sent him on a call like that again for all the boys and girls that have to put up with mental patients and or crying screaming drunks i m sorry you are appreciated posted by dispatchdiva at 10 26 am 2 comments friday july 6 2007 i m used to my officers and their affinity for their guns in most cases if you were to tell them to choose between their ar15 s and sleeping with their wives the wives would be out with the pooches on the porches so to speak what i failed to take into consideration was the officer a corporal no less and his admiration for citizens with the same gun toting law respecting butt kicking mentality as he had on the weekends we have a grant to hire extra officers to keep an eye on our trouble spots mainly a small area of town with numerous bars clubs with rampant closing time violence we had also had a shooting so all officers on this particular side of town were tied up on the shooting while calls were stacking up with no one to respond i had gotten in a burglary from a vehicle at an address the victim was the neighbor of the caller who said that the suspect ran thataway with her boyfriend chasing not that i didn t think this was important but as i said i had no one to respond well that is until she called back saying that her boyfriend and the neighbor victim both had the suspect at gunpoint i asked for cars to start got one of the guys from the grant ok um yeah go ahead i know he s not supposed to do anything but the grant but who am i a lowly dispatcher to tell a cpl no he goes enroute i tell him i ll get him a backer from well somewhere i tell my partner who starts 2 from her side of town which were oh only 15 miles or so away i tell another partner who has the county side of things who starts 2 deputies from about the same distance i hit the floor pedal and tell the cpl that i have 5 enroute forgot one of the k9 s but all were aways away radio goes silent except for the units on the shooting using my main channel to chat about the shooting just a hint take it to the chat channel please next thing i hear is the cpl saying that he s arrived both armed citizens have taken off in foot pursuit of the suspect and he needs one of his backers asap i have one side of the perimeter the armed citizens have the other two sides if i can get one backer here and one here i think that we ll have him boxed in and can have k9 start a track what armed citizens holding a perimeter ok those of you backing copy this is dispatcher speak for i don t care how far away you are get it in gear boys a few minutes later everyone is there perimeter is locked down and i hear ok k9 the citizen is gonna lead you to where to start the track huh then you officers on perimeter check that citizen no no not that citizen that one this one has been checked yes i know he has a gun in his waistband he s ok what no not the citizen with the lantern he s ok too that one over there ok time out i m trying to document all of this on the call even though they re not talking to me but in case the case goes to court someone gets hurt whatever what do i call the armed citizens lantern one and shirtless with a gun under normal circumstances a citizen any citizen within a perimeter would be dog bait fair game for tackle in the dark football whatever i can only picture this in my head a adhd candidate frantically pulling and pointing to the k9 officer to start track right here whilst standing in the very spot to ruin the scent a shirtless wonder with a beer belly and a 357 pointed at his um stuff wiping his nose on his forearm and attempting to look good or at least less incompetant for his trailer queen and an old man with a coleman lantern bottle bottom glasses and plaid polyester pants pulled up to his pits helping this cpl direct the operation like coppola acolytes did i mention the cpl doesn t get to play in the field very often that he s normally in hq i tell myself take a deep breath let it out don t have an irish tempered red headed fit here whew ok i m better now long and short of it everyone is ok suspect is taken into custody citizens have something to brag about and most importantly no one gets shot thank the sweet lord in heaven what s that saying about the lord watching over fools posted by dispatchdiva at 11 43 pm 1 comment monday june 25 2007 they give these people guns ah it s time for the new rookie officers to be cut loose on their own just in time for the new class to hit the streets for field training this means it s time for situationals which are officers posing as citizens in various situations to give the trainees some experience before they hit the street rookie officers are always good for a laugh of course most of them are in their 20 s and lack shall we say life experience however we sometimes get one that has come from a smaller agency and should i repeat should have some clue i have worked situationals numerous times but i think the funniest thing i heard was 10 8 unable to locate excuse me you couldn t locate the officer pretending to be the drunken citizen causing a disturbance at a business he is purposefully there to be found and dealt with that is the point of a situational unfortunately after 4 months of in field training some are no better one came to dispatch to run the packet meaning pick up paperwork from teletype to that division he obviously had never been there before i asked him are you lost and proceeded to tell him go 6 paces forward and ask the lady on your right she ll help you silly me i assumed that these were very clear directions he turned 90 degrees to his right and proceeded to head off to ask the female to his left not right if there was anything to take back to the division when i yelled no back here where you were go forward thataway her yeah that one i just shake my head and ask and they give these people guns posted by dispatchdiva at 11 10 am no comments older posts home subscribe to posts atom blog archive 2008 1 november 1 been 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