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description=10 posts published by edajvor during May 2016;

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eda, the, you, woman, of, about, recent, posts, vor, month, may, 2016, better, to, murder, in, could, be, next, potential, chupa, para, ser, usted, this, house, is, suspect, someone, hug, clara, babies, am, not, your, ally, lament, for, lack, simplicity, 30, minutes, wonderful, girl, don, even, know, absurd, and, delicious, archives, tags, writer, who, writes, women,

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the (126), and (111), you (62), that (51), for (34), with (28), this (27), 2016 (27), was (27), may (26), like (24), who (22), but (22), not (22), because (21), just (19), can (18), her (17), have (16), know (16), about (16), your (15), house (15), had (15), people (14), child (14), what (14), would (14), comment (13), how (13), don (13), 2017 (12), 2018 (12), 2019 (12), all (12), out (12), make (11), little (11), she (11), day (10), more (10), while (10), from (10), leave (10), edajvor (10), even (10), wasn (10), get (9), 2020 (9), 2026 (9), them (9), woman (9), eda (8), want (8), there (8), than (8), things (8), say (8), they (8), other (7), new (7), mom (7), june (7), july (7), october (7), november (7), children (7), kid (7), when (7), take (7), son (7), any (7), see (7), been (7), some (7), way (7), did (7), didn (7), his (7), basement (7), writing (6), self (6), august (6), september (6), march (6), still (6), need (6), back (6), first (6), husband (6), are (6), him (6), let (6), our (6), away (6), much (6), vor (5), parenting (5), april (5), december (5), read (5), love (5), also (5), maybe (5), year (5), today (5), better (5), morning (5), over (5), their (5), baby (5), could (5), yes (5), very (5), time (5), off (5), those (5), big (5), murder (5), really (5), now (4), writer (4), january (4), february (4), 2021 (4), 2025 (4), mind (4), here (4), kind (4), getting (4), has (4), middle (4), watching (4), watch (4), heart (4), needs (4), stop (4), play (4), will (4), boy (4), down (4), business (4), which (4), space (4), live (4), think (4), selfish (4), made (4), crying (4), mother (4), long (4), around (4), saw (4), never (4), fault (4), then (4), several (4), ran (4), living (4), cream (4), question (4), clara (4), paint (4), asked (4), dark (4), wordpress (3), com (3), name (3), sign (3), block (3), care (3), book (3), life (3), guilt (3), mental (3), search (3), lament (3), does (3), coming (3), women (3), seem (3), yourself (3), netflix (3), should (3), 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complaining (2), matter (2), normal (2), soul (2), before (2), ally (2), engage (2), strangers (2), school (2), keep (2), these (2), yours (2), side (2), mcknowbetter (2), louder (2), agree (2), wagon (2), mumbled (2), ignored (2), ugh (2), rack (2), aisles (2), cry (2), felicia (2), episodes (2), grocery (2), too (2), neglect (2), story (2), suspect (2), asking (2), street (2), unfinished (2), split (2), area (2), looked (2), always (2), kitchen (2), granite (2), counter (2), tops (2), garage (2), yeah (2), looks (2), shower (2), clear (2), curtain (2), driveway (2), writes (2), started, design, website, email, write, loading, comments, collapse, bar, manage, subscriptions, view, reader, report, privacy, already, account, join, 259, subscribers, problems, count, wip, star, wars, published, publish, riverdale, newborn, national, novel, editing, camp, books, tags, archives, bars, wandered, tweets, shelf, author, interview, novelist, blogger, mombot, likes, fiction, blogs, bias, fangirling, adventures, publishing, peeeno, noirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, tina, fey, feminists, declare, person, worthy, enjoy, wavers, sex, wear, skirts, part, subtly, empowering, show, frasier, references, delights, entertains, lucky, talent, thank, god, haven, written, anything, haikus, six, likely, somehow, excellent, catch, kimmy, schmidt, kiddo, short, naps, delicious, ground, relentless, sacrifice, public, douchebaggery, comes, actually, attempt, skill, above, ability, attack, blissfully, pre, verbal, 100, willing, share, turns, though, younger, spawn, complete, listen, bring, park, five, conspiracies, probably, bill, paying, meeting, family, rather, personal, fulfillment, tomorrow, storytelling, monday, image, playing, lays, telephone, sure, wakes, running, pee, quick, checklist, biggest, fears, pushing, surviving, apocalypse, alone, spiders, numbers, neurotic, frankly, taking, speaking, bitches, selfishly, abandon, dying, padme, amidala, physically, healthy, whose, turned, crap, die, alive, fair, consider, created, warped, inhuman, cyborg, understand, human, emotion, postpartum, complications, surgery, lifting, nugget, impossible, couple, weeks, unforeseen, issues, knowing, affect, honestly, ache, being, able, lift, fits, hormones, rational, poisoning, diaper, change, vomit, pregnancy, irrevocably, raise, garbage, worth, loved, lost, eventually, facade, 80s, cinema, non, confrontational, female, kick, brag, julia, pshaw, doctors, miracles, happen, bruce, lee, situation, throw, caution, wind, hope, kill, risk, talk, irresponsible, showed, fear, lie, unable, comfort, weekend, saturday, followed, entertaining, involving, ninja, turtles, film, trouble, relating, conservative, southern, ladies, penchant, gossip, strong, willed, resourceful, dolly, parton, savvy, owner, due, homegirl, thriving, salon, credit, annelle, married, criminal, settled, nonsense, went, wild, sinfest, found, jesus, gambling, trip, mistakes, shrug, startled, awake, months, ago, opened, front, door, retrieve, package, delivered, shrieked, shaking, violently, stairs, wrong, soon, collapsed, fit, wrenching, sobs, left, scared, tell, ashamed, both, caught, breath, calmed, wouldn, sight, rest, wonderful, appeal, ben, jerry, whimsical, combination, textures, flavors, wish, chewy, bits, gladly, boston, pie, lack, simplicity, amen, sister, stayed, hellfire, shenanigans, friend, saying, abuse, run, stupid, win, poll, others, especially, ones, behavior, idiot, exactly, ain, universal, truth, goddess, bless, fiery, shouted, right, wants, apparently, approval, approached, anyway, ole, scene, neglectful, abusive, authorities, called, berating, competent, busybodies, overly, concerned, reacting, context, neighbors, calling, cops, parents, goddamn, police, losing, under, control, bigots, course, behaving, appropriately, america, whoa, mean, skin, tones, darker, accents, different, either, bigotry, secondly, clearly, communicating, firm, unloving, intention, safe, incessant, actual, grumbling, addressed, directly, sick, going, case, nothing, happening, every, cannot, stay, hardcore, avoiding, introvert, engages, outcome, definitely, positive, respond, beautiful, absolutely, begin, conversations, negative, statements, nosy, discontentedly, direction, turning, toward, tired, ignorant, moved, whiny, target, mine, father, look, present, cousin, birthday, perused, clearance, summer, duds, red, few, mostly, hearing, myself, since, hit, toddlerhood, best, check, projects, understanding, caring, gaming, culture, severe, momxiety, pass, seeing, dirty, hurts, reach, hands, cage, tink, unbearable, fictional, mombrain, real, upset, joking, own, reals, often, letting, roam, restaurants, freaking, thing, happens, changes, chemistry, makes, horrible, stopped, engaging, sort, consumption, information, emotional, gave, birth, couldn, news, gotham, robot, unfollowed, anyone, social, posted, animal, everything, send, panic, attacks, gamer, gotta, specifically, watched, episode, find, awkwardly, charming, mildly, compelling, someone, hug, darling, estimation, sell, high, cover, losses, indeed, lived, shortcuts, taken, market, shall, buy, gates, finish, installing, light, fixtures, electrical, socket, plates, touch, walls, trim, scraped, price, 1200, feet, conspicuously, extra, neil, gaiman, known, weapons, mold, terrifying, darkness, bother, representation, aunt, three, dogs, cats, hand, section, cabinet, keyed, carrie, underwood, affirmed, added, nicer, rubbing, spot, come, lovely, quiet, town, close, stores, stands, far, loves, tolerate, stand, gorgeous, drawers, slam, hard, tries, scuff, marks, gouges, peels, destructions, pet, adults, occasionally, bump, drop, spill, unless, brand, heads, however, bedroom, district, pay, belong, hunters, assholes, quietly, announce, prefer, mmhmm, says, behind, houses, redecorate, easier, corral, moving, whispered, allegedly, newly, constructed, afternoon, sucks, professionals, wait, plus, discovered, season, jane, virgin, else, chupa, para, ser, usted, buffy, vampire, slayer, calls, answer, wasted, answering, obvious, telemarketing, came, caller, bvs, potential, warn, unsuspecting, visitors, evil, within, cut, grass, wheat, fields, neighbor, huh, nice, showers, inside, icky, lighting, wallpaper, thematically, crushingly, facing, wonder, impale, expected, layout, sense, game, thrones, wrought, iron, hole, swirly, graveyard, died, seems, handy, wow, escaped, another, misleading, continued, driving, two, drivebys, earlier, anticipation, each, craning, necks, possible, passed, adorable, brick, stone, manicured, lawn, seal, coated, swing, set, mama, bear, ready, fight, gay, feminist, skip, menu,

Text of the page (random words):
hat and there was just a shower in the basement just out in the room with a clear curtain a big shower facing the middle of the room with a clear curtain the better to murder you in it was dark like you didn t like the lighting or the wallpaper or like thematically dark like soul crushingly dark it felt icky because it was a murder house do you want to go see that other one no no i just i just want to go home i just want to go to our nice normal house with the finished basement and the showers inside the bathroom our annoying neighbor doesn t seem so bad today huh she still needs to cut her grass it looks like wheat fields it looks like the yard of that house should have looked to warn unsuspecting visitors of the evil within yeah yeah i could be the next potential may 26 2016 may 26 2016 edajvor leave a comment i ll have you know i just wasted 2 minutes of my life answering an obvious telemarketing call because it came up on caller id as bvs when buffy the vampire slayer calls you answer chupa para ser usted may 25 2016 edajvor leave a comment i ve just discovered the first season of jane the virgin on netflix and i can do little else with my free time but watch it writing can wait that s the plus side of writing as a hobby sucks to be you professionals this house is suspect may 22 2016 may 22 2016 edajvor leave a comment or so i whispered to my husband in the unfinished basement of an allegedly newly constructed house this afternoon i love open houses because i like to see how other people live i like to imagine that i live other than how i do i like to redecorate in my mind and imagine how much easier it would be to corral my kid in this new space and then i like to go home because i hate moving my husband and i have it in our heads however that we need more space and a second garage and one more bedroom and a better school district and we don t want to pay for any of those things we belong on house hunters we are those assholes although quietly so because we do not announce how much we hate the paint and would prefer granite counter tops so much as we say oh mmhmm to whatever the realtor says and then bitch behind her back oh but the house we saw today it was lovely from the outside on a quiet street in a busy area of town close to grocery stores and ice cream stands and not too far from work it was a split level which he loves and i tolerate but laid out such that i could stand living there gorgeous kitchen with granite counter tops and those drawers that won t slam no matter how hard your toddler tries but there were scuff marks and gouges and paint peels all those little destructions even a year with a child or a pet would make or several years with adults who occasionally bump into things or drop things or spill things would make things that are no big deal unless it s a brand new construction i ran my hand over a section of cabinet that looked like it had been keyed by carrie underwood and asked this is a new construction the realtor affirmed and added some comment about how new is always nicer is it i asked rubbing a dark spot to see if it would come off it didn t my aunt has three dogs and 4 cats her house has this kind of damage my husband asked about the unfinished basement in a split level that conspicuously mentioned the extra living area in the basement you know for a neil gaiman character known for his weapons skills who doesn t mind a little mold or terrifying darkness no said the realtor who didn t even bother asking us to sign in or if we had representation this is it this is finished so we should finish installing the light fixtures and the electrical socket plates then do you still have the paint so i can touch up the walls and the trim where the paint has been scraped off oh and you re asking price is more than the 5 year old house down the street with 1200 more feet of living space darling this house is suspect my estimation is that they ran out of money and now have to sell as high as they can to cover their losses and if this new construction is indeed finished looking like it s been lived in for 20 years i can t imagine what other shortcuts they may have taken to get it on the market let s go home shall we let s buy more baby gates and call it a day someone hug clara s babies may 20 2016 edajvor leave a comment i m not a gamer so i ll never appreciate it fully but i gotta say i don t like the guild specifically because of clara i watched the first episode which is several episodes on netflix this week during nap time and while i find felicia day awkwardly charming and the story itself mildly compelling i just ugh as a mom i can t handle clara s neglect of her children it s a comedy eda they re joking yes i know and before i had a kid of my own i would have thought it was funny too as a for reals mom i often feel like just letting my child roam around restaurants so mommy can freaking eat but there s also this thing that happens to you when you have a baby that changes your brain chemistry and makes the world a horrible and dangerous place that you just can t handle sometimes i stopped engaging in any sort of consumption of information that was emotional for the first year after i gave birth i couldn t handle the news i had to stop watching gotham and mr robot i unfollowed anyone on social media who posted any stories or pictures of animal or child neglect because everything made me cry at the least or send me into hysterical panic attacks sometimes i hear a stranger s baby crying several aisles away from me in the grocery store and i still get upset seeing clara s children dirty and crying hurts me watching them reach their hands out of the cage at tink s house was unbearable i cried while watching the guild i cried for fictional children mombrain is real i still love felicia day and maybe i ll check out some of her other projects but between not understanding or caring about gaming culture and having severe momxiety i think i ll pass on any more episodes of the guild woman i am not your ally may 15 2016 edajvor leave a comment it was whiny kid day at target and i had sent mine off with his father to look for a present for his cousin s birthday while i perused the clearance rack for some new summer duds yes i heard the boy in the red wagon crying a few aisles over and yes it was annoying mostly because it was that i m not getting my way cry i ve been hearing so much of myself since my son hit toddlerhood but it wasn t my kid and it wasn t my problem so i ignored it the best i could that s when nosy mcknowbetter joined me and mumbled discontentedly in my direction better take care of that kid she said turning her head toward me i ignored her ugh tired of ignorant people she mumbled a little louder i moved on to the next rack now i m a hardcore people avoiding introvert who only engages with strangers when i feel the outcome is almost definitely positive i respond to people who say good morning and how are you today and beautiful day i absolutely do not engage people who begin conversations with negative statements even if i agree with them in this case i did not agree the child was whining because he wasn t getting his way nothing bad was happening every once in a while the boy s mother would say no you cannot get out you need to stay where i can see you in your wagon even so ms mcknowbetter s grumbling got louder as she addressed me directly i m so sick of these people having kids if they re not going to care for them whoa first of all these people do you mean people with skin tones darker than yours or people with accents different than yours because either way i am not on the us side of your them vs us bigotry secondly the woman was very clearly communicating in a firm but not unloving way that her intention was to keep the boy safe other than annoying incessant child whining what was the actual problem here the problem is busybodies it s overly concerned strangers reacting out of context it s neighbors calling the cops on parents who let their children play outside or walk to school it s the goddamn parenting police who want you to know that you are one phone call away from losing your children if you don t keep them under control at all times and bigots of course because even if the child is behaving appropriately america can t be great again until all of them leave again i walked away because no no i am not your ally no i will not engage in berating the parenting skills of a competent mother no apparently she didn t need my approval she approached the woman and her child anyway made a big ole scene about how she was neglectful and abusive and the authorities will be called the woman goddess bless her fiery soul shouted right back at her how is this any of your business my son is whining because he s not getting what he wants what have you never been around kids before you don t even know me you don t know my son and you don t know what you re talking about and ain t that a universal truth i would very much like to take a poll of the people who comment on the parenting skills of others especially the ones complaining about normal child behavior question 1 do you know what a child is question 2 were you ever a child yourself question 3 what kind of idiot are you exactly i don t know what happened next because i stayed the hellfire away from those shenanigans but i did hear the mother in question talking to her friend as they walked away who does she think she is coming up to a stranger and saying i abuse my kid because i won t let him run around the store you know she d be complaining even more if i did stupid people you just can t win no matter what you do amen sister a lament for lack of simplicity may 13 2016 may 13 2016 edajvor leave a comment i know that the appeal of ben and jerry s is the whimsical combination of textures and flavors but sometimes i wish i could get just the ice cream without all the chewy bits i would gladly eat boston cream pie ice cream all by itself 30 minutes of wonderful may 9 2016 edajvor 1 comment my son was startled awake from his morning nap once several months ago when i opened the front door to retrieve a package that had just been delivered he shrieked and ran to the living room gate shaking it violently and screaming his name for me i ran back up the stairs to see what was wrong and as soon as he saw me he collapsed in a fit of the most heart wrenching sobs i ve ever heard he thought i left him he was scared and i wasn t there to tell him it was ok i ve never had my heart broken like that and i m not ashamed to say that i joined him on the floor and cried with him until we both caught our breath and calmed down he wouldn t let me out of his sight for the rest of the day as i mentioned on twitter i saw steel magnolias for the first time over the weekend my son took a long nap saturday morning followed by some very focused self entertaining play time involving play food and ninja turtles while i can appreciate a lot about the film i had a lot of trouble relating to the characters conservative southern ladies with a penchant for gossip who although they were strong willed and resourceful didn t seem to take any responsibility for the things that happened to them dolly parton s character wasn t a savvy business owner but a woman with an out of work husband who had to make due homegirl had a thriving salon take credit for that woman you did that yourself annelle maybe married a criminal but it wasn t her fault settled that nonsense and went off on a wild sinfest which wasn t her fault and then found jesus again after a gambling trip that wasn t her fault take some responsibility for your mistakes yo i have very little respect for people who just let things happened to them and shrug it off as not their fault eventually i saw through the facade of 80s cinema trying to make a non confrontational women s movie with female characters who could kick some a but would never brag about it and focused on ms julia yes there are times you need to pshaw your doctors and make miracles happen walk on bruce lee but having a child isn t the kind of situation where you just throw caution to the wind and hope things work out you don t say well this might kill me but as long as i get what i want for a little while i don t mind the risk to hell with that i say that is selfish talk that is irresponsible and the reason i m gonna go head and hate this movie is because it showed me my very worst fear my baby screaming for me as i lie unconscious on the floor unable to comfort him now i had some postpartum complications that laid me up a little while and a surgery that made lifting my little love nugget almost impossible for a couple weeks but it was all unforeseen health issues i had no way of knowing would affect us the way it did and honestly it wasn t all that bad but the guilt and the ache i felt at not being able to even lift my baby sent me into hysterical crying fits also the hormones made me less than rational i had food poisoning once and had to stop in the middle of a diaper change to go vomit and felt like the worst mother in the world so to know full well that pregnancy would irrevocably damage my body such that i didn t know how long i d be around to raise my child no no shelby you selfish piece of garbage it is not worth it to have loved and lost in that way because it s not about you bitch and speaking of bitches who selfishly abandon their children dying of a broken heart i m looking at you padme amidala physically healthy but with no will to live you think you re the first woman whose husband turned out to be a piece of crap you can t deal so you re just gonna die leave your babies who you re alive enough to name but not enough to think of a reason to live selfish although to be fair i consider that whole business to have been created by the warped and inhuman brain of george lucas who is himself a cyborg that doesn t fully understand human emotion still selfish so here i am monday morning with that image from steel magnolias playing over and over in my head of the little boy screaming while shelby lays unconscious by the telephone i m here making sure my son can see me when he wakes up i m running to the bathroom to pee quick as i can i m making a mental checklist of my biggest fears and pushing surviving the apocalypse alone and spiders down to numbers 2 and 3 oh and i m also trying not to be a total neurotic nut about this whole business which frankly is taking up most of my mental space today will i get any writing today that isn t about mom guilt and george lucas conspiracies probably not might be a better day for laundry and bill paying and meeting the needs of house and family rather than personal fulfillment tomorrow i ll go back to storytelling girl i don t even know you may 5 2016 may 5 2016 edajvor leave a comment listen i get that you don t bring the kids to the park to play with them because you re a mom with needs and what you need is for you...