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all of this has absolutely nothing to do with allen or any part of him people don t care about the truth and once again there are people so good at manipulation you would never be able to overcome their deceit but i don t care to anymore people believe what they want to so let them have it and gorge themselves on it i have a life to live and i intend to make the most of it on my terms y all be good and be safe i may drop in once a year or such and let you know a little of what s up as things progress i m still here and going allen and i still have a lot of work to do and i don t intend to let him down if you are inclined you can find me on instagram dragonvalleyartworks or on facebook ann beaird i can also control who follows me there i don t post a lot on instagram but there are a few things and you can message me thank you all very much for the many years of companionship and encouragement that you gave me on this blog posted by mamahen at 10 39 pm 7 comments sunday november 03 2019 my heart is broken october 23 my heart was ripped in half allen passed away suddenly from a massive stroke and i don t think my heart will ever be whole again if you ve read this blog for long then you know allen and how much a part of my life he was and i was to him well beyond romantic partners we were best friends cohorts work buddies allen and i have been together for 27 years in one form or another almost all of my adult life i met him when i was only out of college maybe a year he was there to help me through my brother s death he is the reason i got into construction and became a tradesperson no matter what life brought we were always there for each other it occurred to me the other day that even though we never took the marriage vows with each other we lived them with each other and it was only death that parted us i ve experienced well over my share of pain and heartache in my life and i ve gotten a belly full of life s unfairness we had finally found freedom from taking care of others fred passed away in april allen was able to do whatever he wanted with his property and life and we were enjoying just being he was joyously working on building a coffeeshop after spending his entire life building things for everyone else no worries but what to have for lunch or supper it was just me and him again and although we remained just friends we were closer than we had been in a very long time we were having fun and i was starting to feel better after finally getting my meds adjusted correctly finally feeling like living again all those years we but mostly he took care of fred and took his abuse and allen doesn t even outlive him a year there is nothing that will ever make sense to me anymore nothing is fair right justified nothing i am eternally grateful that i was with him and able to get him to the er in a timely manner but it came on so fast no one seemed to see it coming it actually appeared to be his heart at first the last thing he knew was talking to me and that i was holding his arm he lived until the next day when they took him off life support but i know he passed away not long after he lost consciousness it s really hard for me to understand he s gone i swing between numbness and the most excruciating pain i ve ever known i can only hope he understood how much i love him and that one day we will be together again posted by mamahen at 9 42 pm 4 comments sunday september 15 2019 so much to say i just spent an hour and a half typing a fairly detailed account of what s been going on and how i am doing and blogger just ate it all i have no idea where it went so that s really frustrating i have trouble typing these days as it is and then to have it deleted after i struggled through a fairly long post you are a piece of crap blogger if i get the energy i will try to redo it all i am doing very well and am happy things are going very well i ll try to get back soon there has been a great many changes and stuff happening and i d like to update everyone in the meantime i am on facebook if you would like to join me there you might send me a pm if you never commented a lot on the blog so that i know who you are i don t know that i will ever get back to posting much here but i do write some on fb and post about the house and stuff it s actually easier to post on facebook and i can control who sees my life there i m not very inclined anymore to just open everything up to the world at large i got nothing to hide but i do not trust people and the world is very very different than what it was 12 years ago when i first started blogging i will include a photo of one recent project i just finished i got all the flooring down in the bedroom and repainted redecorated etc i am very pleased with the results i will try to blog about installing the flooring i m moving on to the kitchen now posted by mamahen at 11 41 pm 9 comments monday april 08 2019 here i am well so i just look at people like this all the time now actually but anyway hey i m still around and doing well i m tired and have a lot going on but i m doing good since the last time i posted my mom had a small stroke which she recovered very well from then she had some spinal issues but we got that worked out also since my brother lives in the way northern part of the state and she and my sister had a bit of a row i was the main caregiver in these incidences but that s fine because mama is generally easy to deal with then we had new windows put in her house and i went out of town a few times to do some work for daddy rabbit that was fun but hard on me physically i have a couple of part time jobs and various work i do some of it from home so that s great let s me work on things here too and rest when i need to or when i m having a real bad day then about 2 weeks ago a huge tornado came through here right down my road i was actually at my mom s when it happened and we watched it on tv they were pointing at my road and saying it s right here i had no idea if i had a house anymore or anything i couldn t get allen on the phone which scared me to death i finally got home but it took a long time as there were countless trees down on our road the police told me it was over 40 down i don t doubt it both ways were blocked i finally got in through an old gravel back road and then to allen s to see if he was okay he was my place was okay several trees down and the top of one through the chicken s run but they are all okay too we were without power for a couple of days and without phones for several but they finally got it all fixed still cleaning up the mess then another one came through early this morning but i was so tired i slept through it it did some damage but was further north of here seems like there has been more to happen but i can t remember i have meant to post more but in lots of ways i am reluctant to post much i just don t have as much to say anymore and i don t trust anyone that little meme i started with is actually true i ve had someone guess who try to break into my credit card account i got the ol you ve tried to log it too many times email from them and saying i must change my password which i promptly did and on a bunch of other stuff too then they were trying to get a hold of other financial info trying to find out how i m living and not having to sell this place or whatever no i m not living off credit cards or some man ha i d drink gasoline before there will ever be another man living here but anyway i m just not inclined to talk much anymore i don t trust people due to so much bullshit and so many batshit crazy people that will cut your throat first chance they get i would like to start another blog and refine what i post about but things have got to get less crazy first i hope everyone out there is doing well i do hope to establish some kind of posting again about the house because i am starting to work on it again but also a personal blog in another location i hope you ll check in on me every once in a while posted by mamahen at 11 11 pm 6 comments older posts home subscribe to posts atom about me mamahen southeast united states i m a 50 something female free spirit haunting the woods of northern alabama college educated redneck construction worker turned to art now who knows what you ll read about here i enjoy all comments and emails and try to answer each one you can reach me at mamahenb gmail com view my complete profile it s all mine i hereby claim all photos and contents of posts are copyrighted so ask if you want to use any of it thanks you oughtta know as a commercial carpenter i strongly advise anyone who is considering building their own home or other significant structure to please fully understand all of the building code and licensing requirements for your area before you start your project helpful links betterhelp i like reading a homesteading neophyte an english in kentucky chiot s run coffee with the hermit deep fried kudzu down to earth fairhope supply co from a heavenly land hayley minnesota farm woman outside clyde pile of omelays pure florida riverbend journal rurality six bears two men and a little farm woody s rocky ridge popular posts rusted a reader asked me to show a few pics of the rebar handrail i did for the deck and how it had aged i had initially sprayed the whole deck a my heart is broken october 23 my heart was ripped in half allen passed away suddenly from a massive stroke and i don t think my heart will ever be who piggies pig s feet snap ties this post may be quite boring to most of you but i have been wanting to put it up for some time now after studying my hits on site meter don t fence me in i finally started on the deck handrails this past weekend any free time i have had lately has been spent trying to fix problems or kill b in the meantime thankfully the garden has not taken a vacation and i was pleased to see some major growth in things when we returned some things are d never going back again hello to anyone who may still be checking in here on occasion i m still around but time marches on and lots of things have changed in hunting bears over the last several years i ve read quite a bit about numerous wild animal species making comebacks in population or starting to appe let your love grow tall the garden as a whole has done very well this year some things like the squash and zukes have about pooped out at this point and are n hangin on you still here hey folks those few of you still dropping by i m still hangin in and working on stuff thought i good times bad times well sorry that i have been so lax on posting lately but to be honest i have lost all interest in it now it is not that i do not enjo blog archive 2023 1 january 1 never going back again 2021 1 september 1 2020 2 september 1 june 1 2019 3 november 1 september 1 april 1 2018 8 november 1 august 1 may 1 february 2 january 3 2017 8 december 1 august 1 june 2 april 2 march 1 february 1 2016 13 november 1 october 1 august 2 july 2 june 1 april 2 march 1 february 1 january 2 2015 55 december 1 october 1 september 2 august 7 july 7 june 6 may 5 april 6 march 7 february 7 january 6 2014 89 december 7 november 7 october 8 september 6 august 4 july 7 june 7 may 8 april 13 march 6 february 10 january 6 2013 86 december 8 november 7 october 6 september 6 august 6 july 8 june 8 may 7 april 10 march 6 february 5 january 9 2012 91 december 7 november 7 october 2 september 6 august 8 july 11 june 8 may 11 april 6 march 9 february 4 january 12 2011 136 december 10 november 6 october 5 september 10 august 15 july 13 june 11 may 13 april 10 march 16 february 15 january 12 2010 181 december 14 november 13 october 15 september 14 august 13 july 15 june 13 may 16 april 17 march 12 february 16 january 23 2009 163 december 23 november 13 october 14 september 11 august 20 july 14 june 11 may 11 april 7 march 8 february 14 january 17 2008 120 december 9 november 12 october 14 september 13 august 14 july 9 june 8 may 11 april 9 march 9 february 6 january 6 2007 91 december 6 november 8 october 5 september 8 august 10 july 11 june 9 may 7 april 7 march 8 february 7 january 5 2006 91 december 3 november 2 october 6 september 5 august 4 july 7 june 5 may 12 april 16 march 19 february 12 labels anti stuff 24 art 91 attic 2 bathroom 20 being goofy 35 birding 8 block work 11 blues 25 books 7 chickens 162 chigger 44 cleaning 4 cold 33 concrete 50 conserving 57 cooling 2 countertops 2 creative building 73 critters 95 debate 33 dirt work 20 drawings 7 driveway 11 drywall 7 electrical 12 family 53 fasteners 6 feeling wild 2 finances 26 first aid 1 flashing 2 floor system 7 flooring 7 flowers 103 food 85 foraging 3 formwork 14 foundation 14 framing 33 friends 70 frugal 4 fruiting plants 57 fun 71 funny stories 19 garden 183 gas lines 2 getting off your a 32 green 22 grendal 28 guest bloggers 1 handrails 3 hardware 2 health 96 heating 15 herbs 8 herstory 15 hobbies 6 holidays 69 house 85 how to 53 insufferable self promotion 23 insulation 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is a personal blog written and edited by me this blog does not accept any form of advertising sponsorship or paid insertions i write for my own purposes however we may be influenced by our background occupation religion political affiliation or experience in fact i m heavily influenced by those things as i guess most people are i do not claim to be an expert on anything except my own screw ups i will not be held responsible if you read this blog and then proceed to burn your house down cut off any bodily appendages are eaten by rabid chickens get divorced or are befallen by any other act of destruction or build a house that you ultimately hate and waste all your money in other words this blog is just flat out my personal opinion and nothing more the owner s of this blog is not compensated to provide opinion on products services websites and various other topics the views and opinions expressed on this blog are purely the blog owners which you should take with a grain of salt and a 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