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ded a weekend getaway we were tossing around ideas there was pocatello idaho falls lava hot springs jackson hole moab grand junction vegas and st george luckily mike s co worker owns a few condo s in st george and was able to rent us one for a cheap price for the whole weekend like a really cheap price we left shortly after we got off work on friday and made just a few stops along our way the first was in payson to see my bailee and surprise her with a back to school gift and an i m sorry we re not taking you with us gift this will be my goo s second concert and i am more than thrilled to spend it with her after visiting with the bug we headed on towards the geezy it was a fun road trip we giggled listened to the radio and then to my ipod not mike s choice our stop before st geez was in in the beav i have for the past 8ish years wanted an i love beaver t shirt and a pic of me in the big ole beaver rocking chair my dreams were fulfilled we finally hit st george at around 11pm because we were in a different condo than the last time i took pictures of the whole place but for some reason my photo editor won t let me rotate and edit them tonight so i give up however here are some other fun little pictures the first is the awesome pool this next one i absolutely love it was a total candid moment i can t stand still when anyone touches my neck mike knows this and rarely ever kisses me there i was standing there with him getting ready to take a pic and he attacked my neck you can already see it was making me giggle out of control but i have to admit i did need to do a little ass kicking afterwards my neck is off limits unless oh nevermind haha here is the pic we took after the neck attack geez i sure love this sexy piece of man meat and here is me giving him loving kisses we sure love each other so very much i completely agree that we were made just for each other the next day i met up with my old high school buddy and we got pedicure went shopping and went to lunch i loved every minute of seeing her and catching up the worst thing about this pedicure is that they sucked 30 for a pedi where your polish chips after a day and your feet don t end up smooth and soft yeah sorry for the language that s fucked up i m sorry ivy this was your first pedi come to slc and i ll take you to an amazing place that charges less than 30 and your feet are soft for weeks and the polish doesn t chip unless your nails grow out or you chip your nail yourself for lunch we went to it was mediocre at best but of course the cheddar biscuits were to die for after our lunch and little shopping spree at target i needed a new swim suit and of course some cute dresses haha we went our separate ways and i went back to our condo with my lover the next group of pictures is of me fried after the vacay mike and i in the condo before swimming ivy and my tootsies and me floating on a swim raft there was also a lot of margarita drinking which i know i should have paced myself but i was on vacay for the first time in a long time without bailee so please don t judge we laid by the pool pretty much every waking second it was so amazing it brought me back to my natural roots where i loved summer the water and the sun i don t think most of you know but i was a crazy swimmer from about 2 i started on the swim team at an early age 4 i believe and did amazing i had mad crazy blue ribbons for being so super awesome and fast my uncle shane was my best friend and my most amazing supporter team member partner during these times i still and always will consider him my big brother anyways because of my old swimming roots i was drawn to the pool this entire trip frying my legs i took the temp picture at about 9am while we were at the pool it was over 100 and i paid for it i haven t gotten this much sun since about 2002 pre bee the top picture is of me at 3am after we got home from our vacay you can see some of my ouchiness from my sunburn the other pic is of course a fun little picture of my mr and i at the pool here are a few more fun pictures from our stay at the condo me cheesing it up floatin i could do this for hours my handsome soon to be hopefully sooner than later hubby at this point i was bored and was just snapping away i am not lying i am fried still on sunday on our way home i really wanted to stop and visit my grandparents resting place i haven t been there yet and i have been aching to sit and just talk to them so we stopped by the hurricane cemetery and found their plots i put my blanket down planted some gorgeous daisies for grandma and placed a handful of pine nuts for grandpa and then i broke down i cried for so long i talked to them about how horrible i feel for not being the best grandchild and visiting or calling more i cried because i don t feel like i got enough time with them for example my grandma died at 62 it was such an emotional reunion but i felt them right next to me holding me tight and letting me know in their own way that i am special i really can t wait to visit them many times a year i haven t lost anyone close to me besides the two of them so just sitting there and crying and talking to them helps so much i also can t wait to take bailee there and let her talk to them to end this post i am going to add some photos i took while chatting with my grandparents i miss them so very much and i hate myself daily for not being the perfect granddaughter that i could have been it s also not easy having a family member make you feel like crap when you already feel awful i miss having a connection with my family things have changed so much over the years and i am saddened that we have all grown so far apart that we re afraid to call each other just to check in maybe it is just a part of getting older but i am not close at all with my family and it kills me every day i went through such a crazy spell after my divorce with eric and i have lost soooo many people who were so important to me how do i fix it i ve tried calling texting fbing ugh i give up i m not who i was a year or two ago i have grown so much in the past six months i guess i know who my real friends are now and the sad thing it s not very many i would ve stuck by you when or if you went crazy for a short amount of time either way i have mike i have bailee and i have eric and to be honest i am happier than i ve been in years betcha can t say that without a lie written by jamilyn at 1 49 am no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest wednesday july 25 2012 happy 9th birthday bailee a little over 9 years ago i looked like this roughly 2 3 weeks later i looked like this after getting the epidural and the very next morning this was my reward i am the proudest mama there is i love this little girl more than i could possibly imagine she is my angel and my bestest friend i hope you have a great birthday bailee know that mama loves you the mostest xoxoxox written by jamilyn at 1 40 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest monday july 23 2012 chicago yesterday was my beautiful grandmothers 71st birthday a few of us went to park city to have dinner and watch the musical chicago at the egyptian theater we met at wasatch brewery for dinner and then headed to the theater for the musical it was amazing i am pretty sure i am now a musical show fan i loved it so much my favorite song was the cell block tango don t all men have it coming hahaha jk i can t wait to introduce more theater to bailee she s seen thriller so far written by jamilyn at 6 00 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest wednesday july 4 2012 new health blog i ve been being awesome at loosing weight for over 2 weeks now and have started a blog you should check it out and follow me on my journey everydayimlosingit blogspot com written by jamilyn at 2 53 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest happy america day this is one of my favorite holidays and i m sick with the flu at least look at this old cute picture of bailee and i on this holiday 2 years ago written by jamilyn at 2 52 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest saturday june 30 2012 my children bailee and her sister tippy written by jamilyn at 3 25 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest thursday june 21 2012 lagoooooooooooon i am so excited that bailee is finally at the age where she loves all rides i knew it was coming after disneland this year and the fact that we rode the california screamin tower of terror and splash mountain a thousand and one times gooey rode every single thrill ride at lagoon a couple weeks ago i am such the proud mama written by jamilyn at 7 13 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest tags family summer 2012 summer2012 lagoon bailee favorite quote i saw this quote yesterday and i am in love this is exactly what i needed i just started this new lifestyle change a few days ago and have been needing encouragement it is so nice to have a totally new quote that i ve never seen before to help me along this way i have saved this photo as my lock screen on my iphone i have it plastered on my desk i am also putting it my kitchen this is very powerful to me no more fat jami written by jamilyn at 7 06 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest wednesday may 30 2012 sushi blah we went out for sushi last night at ginza and i was sorely disappointed i haven t had it in over a month and wanted it again before i started my diet today well it could be worse it could have been delicious and made dieting even harder haha well played sushi well played dieting for the summer is going to be rough but i am determined to be thinner by my 30th i can do it i mean it s just food right wish me luck operationskinnyjamilyn2012 written by jamilyn at 4 41 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest tuesday may 29 2012 lagoon all summer long i went and bought us all lagoon season passes this past weekend i figured that we usually go at least 2 times so why not mike and i went on saturday for a few hours we had so much fun i can t wait to go again this weekend d written by jamilyn at 4 12 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest new suits for sumah boogs talked mama into 2 new bathing suits for summer i can t believe in a week she ll be out and leaving me at least i get her every other weekend happy sumah 2012 everyone written by jamilyn at 4 04 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest thursday december 22 2011 the sun will rise it ll be alright i know my post last night was depressing especially for this time of the year all i know is that for some reason god gives me another day now to find how to make that day work to my advantage i know i m not working and am slightly handicapped in my left hand but i can and will turn this home into a masterpiece something for mike to be proud of too bad i need money for shelves anyone know of any men willing to help dad or even easy bookcases it s time to take back my womanhood and my home i want more than anything in this world for mike to walk in the door after a long days work to a happy clean home and of course dinner would be good too but we all know he is a better chef i love you mike and i love my snuggle buggly bailee written by jamilyn at 5 05 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest tags cleanliness love mood stabalizer organization redecorating on the bright side i have mike still standing by me and i couldn t love him more yes i d love that special question to finally be asked to me but i am also happy with where things are in our lives i love this photo because it shows so much love for each other even though it is impeccably blurry i love this man with everything inside of me christmas may totally bite the dust this year but it is the first christmas we ll be spending as just us with hopefully many many many more to come wink wink nudge nudge lol we were both just ready for something different this year we are poor and can t contribute to each other in gifts so why not spend it alone together whether we go to wendover or stay home i just hope it s the best christmas without bailee ever written by jamilyn at 12 34 am no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest wednesday december 21 2011 christmas heartache not having your child with you is obviously the most heart wrenching way to spend your christmas now not having any funds to actually get her gifts that brings on a whole other feeling of heart wrenching pain i know it s not about christmas i know it s about christ and his birth but i am dying i broke down at target today because i could only afford her a barbie doll with a 5 coupon which made the doll 5 bucks itself i was on the phone with a friend while asking the concession s lately for a cup for ice water when i burst into tears a friendly gentleman grabbed my arm and told me to breathe it was all going to be ok that s when i sat in my car for 10 minutes crying my eyes out i don t see this being ok i don t see an end to this and no i m not just talking about christmas i ache i ache so badly and don t have the courage to ask for help oh and i miss bailee i miss her immensely i want to be the one with her on christmas morning i want to tuck her in and read her our traditional story on christmas eve i ache for her as well written by jamilyn at 11 19 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest tags christmas depression devestation lonliness sadness sunday september 18 2011 silly kitty written by jamilyn at 4 43 pm no comments email this blogthis share to x share to facebook share to pinterest tags tipsee older posts home subscribe to posts atom feel free to add this to your blog as well about me jamilyn view my complete profile mommy daughter bailee blog archive 2012 11 august 1 st geezy end of summer vacay july 4 june 3 may 3 2011 10 december 3 september 2 august 1 june 2 april 1 january 1 2010 54 december 3 november 8 october 1 september 1 august 2 july 3 june 13 may 3 april 5 march 3 february 7 january 5 2009 206 december 10 november 10 october 7 september 14 august 23 july 24 june 15 may 13 april 18 march 24 february 27 january 21 2008 203 december 29 november 33 october 45 september 12 august 25 july 26 june 9 may 14 march 2 february 4 january 4 2007 56 december 6 october 5 september 2 august 1 july 5 june 8 may 2 march 8 february 5 january 14 2006 64 december 6 november 17 october 9 september 16 august 5 july 5 june 4 may 2 my facebook page jamilyn ashton wray create your badge live traffic feed feedjit live blog stats followers counting free counter 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