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ugh from the mundane to the mundane and back again ugh from the mundane to the mundane and back again random blog entry i hate me part 876 882 i love going to the diner it s not specifically a jersey thing but i ve seen more proper diners here than anywhere else it was one of the first places where as a teenager i was taken seriously as a customer i d go in by myself with a couple of comic books order a burger and a coke and i was treated like any other adult customer i don t go a lot anymore but it s always a treat when i do the two main ones by me are the americana which has a bunch of small sun bleached baseball statues by the entrance which answers the question what would mickey mantle look like as an albino and the all seasons which used to be called the four seasons i figured they got some inside information that a fifth season was going to be added so they wanted beat the rush on a name change i used to go here kind of a lot and occasionally ordered a vanilla coke a waitress there who i m sure was just treating me like a regular here s the vanilla coke guy brought one every time i went in most times i just wanted water or coffee but i always got a vanilla coke so instead of telling her i didn t want one i just stopped going there yesterday i went to the americana it was crowded got a table ordered cheeseburger fries coffee the waitress was an older woman fast with the enthusiastic practiced banter a real pro when she brought my food here you go honey enjoy i will try and stop me now i was trying to match her enthusiasm but my enthusiastic response was a bit over the top and i sounded like a psycho she just kind of looked at me and i realized that i had possibly overstepped the social contract between server and customer i stammered a it looks great but the damage was done she did come by to refill my coffee and leave the check with a subdued i ll just leave this here yes i over tipped 2019 10 15 category i hate me uncategorized tags diner new jersey 7 comments i hate me part 833 970 went to foodtown after i got out of work it was close to closing time for them and i grabbed the couple of things i needed and went to the self checkout i know i should be using the cashier checkouts but i was feeling fairly anti social and didn t want any human interaction no matter how small i was paying in cash and it wouldn t accept a 5 i put in the kid who was minding the checkouts came over really quickly and i ll get you a different five no that s cool i got another one that ones seen better days no no i ll be right back with another five no really please don t and he was gone but he didn t come right back he was talking to the person at the courtesy desk and it felt like i could have paid the bill in pennies one penny after another and it would have been faster then him getting a different five finally he came back and put the new five dollar bill into the machine with all the flourish of a ribbon cutting ceremony yeah when i saw that five you were trying to use i knew it wasn t gonna work the machine hates worn out fives and so do i i mumbled a thanks and slunk out 2019 09 27 category foodtown and other supermarkets uncategorized tags foodtown shopping comments off on i hate me part 833 970 i hate me part 862 999 phone call sounded like a middle aged woman phone rings jack s music silence hello jack s music oh i thought you said not jack s music uh no this is jack s music answering the phone not jack s music is kind of uh odd don t you think ummm well if you were somebody that uh got a lot of wrong numbers calling you looking for jack s music you um might answer the phone that way ok uh well what can i help you with ummm now i ve forgotten i ll call back maybe this store exists somewhere 2019 09 25 category i hate me i like records uncategorized tags record store record store clerk record stores retail 1 comment i hate me part 850 301 middle aged couple looked like they were killing time waiting for a table at a nearby restaurant they guy did all the talking i m looking for a band uh huh none of our used records are on file but it s alphabetical in that row you re standing by i m not sure if you got em i don t know if you know em i don t know where to look well it s alphabetical duke jupiter if we had any they d be in d can you look it up none of our used records are on file found one yeah awwww i already got this you got the other ones they got different covers i think they re white yeah i don t know if we have any others dude i need em even cassettes but not this one holds up the album that he didn t want yeah sorry man whatever s out there heavy sigh mumbled to his wife as they were leaving i would have taken cassettes 2019 09 23 category i like records music and related uncategorized tags record store record store clerk record stores retail comments off on i hate me part 850 301 i hate me part 817 045 friday night middle aged guy kind of wired at the back counter you got that aids benefit from the 70 s or the 80 s queen was in it do you mean live aid the big benefit for the famine in africa that queen played naaahh it was for aids lots of bands queen you know aids live aids do you mean the concert that was in the film bohemian rhapsody yeah live aids you know the guy from queen uh he had aids so uh live aids we don t have it 2019 09 16 category i hate me i like records uncategorized tags record store record store clerk record stores retail comments off on i hate me part 817 045 i hate me part 888 751 older middle aged guy a little drinky looking through the new arrivals lp rack yeah so records are back are these in any order i explained our filing system so no good stuff i m surprised you don t have the good popular stuff well popular stuff sells yeah but are you telling me people are still buying the stones yeah rolling stones records sell really i took my daughter to see em so you have a guy in his 50 s taking a 30 year old to see a 70 year old amazing so where s the good stuff olton john i don t see his stuff in the o s well his name is elton john and we file him in the j s oh so where s the good stuff i did a fake phone call and hid in the back until he left 2019 08 26 category i hate me i like records uncategorized tags record store record store clerk record stores retail 2 comments i hate me part 829 040 call gets sent to the back counter looking for a dvd sounds like a middle aged guy yeah i m looking for the bruce davidson willard not that other piece of garbage willard is a 1971 movie about a guy who trains rats to kill for him it was remade in 2003 with crispin glover ok let me check heavy sigh ok it s just available as a dvd blu ray combo which means 2 discs one is a blu ray and one is a regular dvd we don t have it but we can order it in yeah i ain t got a blu ray well there s two discs in the package one is a regular dvd and one is a blu ray why do they do that i don t know man so you have it in the store no we have to order it in takes about a week it s 24 99 an that s for a blu ray that i ain t gonna watch and a regular dvd yup so you guys ain t got it we do not click not that other piece of garbage 2019 08 12 category i hate me i like records uncategorized tags dvd record store record store clerk 3 comments i hate me part 855 987 two more 1 older guy with a plain cloth tote bag containing the records he was looking to sell after we made a deal on the records he picked up his bag what do you think of this bag does it look like a ladies bag no just looks like a tote bag it doesn t uh make me look uh ah you look like a guy who s carrying a bag of records no no that s not what mean uh ah it doesn t matter it s not my bag anyway so ya know that s cool it s just a bag yup it s just a bag that s not mine 2 we got a sealed tool 10 000 days cd exchanged at the store with a cryptic note from the cashier on it returned because it s a cover band it seems that a father and son bought the cd and quickly brought it back and instead of saying we bought the wrong cd can we switch it for something else the father said he googled the album and his google search said that it wasn t actually tool that made 10 000 days but a cover band and couldn t be convinced otherwise 2019 07 22 category i like records red bank uncategorized tags record store record store clerk record stores retail 1 comment i hate me 810 732 two items today 1 middle aged guy shorts tucked in t shirt back counter of the store know what i m looking for now this is usually not a question it s a lead in and 999 out of a 1 000 it s quickly followed by what the customer is looking for not this time after an uncomfortable amount of time ya got me no idea what you want sheryl crow heart characters like that artists who are women you know are you looking for them on cd or lp yes well we have a ton of cd s on both and maybe a few used heart lps ok then ok then cd s ok he bought some stuff and as he was leaving he held up a jack s bag full of cd s i paid for this don t worry so i m good 32 dollars you got from me but you guys deserve it i m good to go 2 sean took care of this customer he s been a regular for years and sometimes returns used cds as defective his explanations are usually good he returned a used korn cd yeah this plays fine at home but when i m in my car this one and a pantera cd i bought just play a loop of nature sounds i m gonna keep the pantera though 2019 07 16 category i like records red bank uncategorized tags humor record store record store clerk retail leave a comment i hate me part 884 907 end of the day closing we made the announcements closing in 10 minutes closing in 5 we re closed the last people a middle aged couple headed up front with nothing then they saw a rack of jack s music shirts the guy who was looking at the shirts was roughly my size xxl holds up shirt to show his wife i think i can fit into a large i don t know are you sure maybe something bigger nah i got this looks at the shirt again you think something bigger yes bigger yes he holds up an xl this ll be good right it s now about five minutes after we closed and there is no way that this guy is fitting into an xl so i piped in look man we re about the same size and i m wearing a xxl of that shirt they fit good he looked me up and down made a lemon face yeah i think i m gonna go with the xl he finally headed to the counter as he was getting rung up maybe i ll try this on just to make sure it fits looks at his wife right he wore a polo shirt and he tried to put the t shirt over that it didn t go well and i m thinking if the shirt doesn t fit you must acquit after a long minute of shirt wrestling he admitted defeat and bought the xxl and the long national nightmare was over 2019 07 12 category i like records uncategorized tags etc humor record store record store clerk record stores retail leave a comment 1 2 3 120 feeling unlucky then try the random ugh blog generator located below the calendar like russian roulette with six 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