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Text of the page (random words):
not rich we always complain maybe we will stop complaining once we all get rich but i doubt that we will always complain because we never cease to find the negative side of things fonzi christ monday january 18 2016 no comments 18 october 2013 the better end of educ 14 we always get to the point where we have to pronounce the final words after we start drifting away from each other we do this to express rancor or love or gratitude this also gives us the opportunity to say about things we directly or vicariously experienced along the journey of doing things we performed together at the beginning of the course i mentioned that i want to know how guidance and counseling impacted student achievements in the process i ve met questions that need insightful answers i wondered if guidance can exist without counseling or can counseling exist without guidance i learned that these two concepts or human activities are also two different things they are not transposable they cannot happen in the absence of the other otherwise their goals to transform and improve life cannot be achieved i learned that guidance and counseling have to happen together one after the other or both at the same time in doing our portfolio i was bombarded with many apprehensions and awareness about helping we matter to the lives of those people around us and it only takes a touch of a hand or a tap on the shoulder to start the act of helping and consoling our words matter to people who value us that s why when we write them messages we show them how we treat them this portfolio has compelled me to linger on the internet to confirm my personal answers to trivial questions this portfolio has encouraged me to become creative i swear i ve never been this creative before even in my humanities class i don t like cutting out papers or drawing things and mixing up colors i am not skilled in these things but this portfolio swayed me to the other side i learned that i have the potential to be creative i am creative in the way i knit words together or in the way i systematize my ideas i am overwhelmed with gratitude that despite the bunch of stuff to complete at the end of the semester i was able to accomplish them with patience and determination of a teacher i can t believe i did this the writing of my biography was very exhausting seriously i suffered several repetitive strain injuries on my right arm in the process of writing you know that feeling when your ideas are flowing ceaselessly and you don t have the speed of hand to write them all it s frustrating the memories jam at some portion of the paper and you don t know how to unclog them it is difficult telling your own story because you have the opportunity to lie or just be honest you know you have to tell them honestly without pretensions yet you re scared that someone will be reading them and they judge you because you did those things in the past but i acknowledge the fact that this writing is only a way of getting acceptance of myself that when i tell them about a part of my experience i unload the burden that i endure for so many years that i didn t share them to other people i am thinking about the days in the future when i tell stories to my students and i need to remember things in college i want to remember this because this is remarkably a great thing to remember i can t tell exactly how much i learned in this course my grades won t literally tell them but when i wake up each day and i still have something to ponder about from the making of this output i know i have learned more than i am ought to learn in this course fonzi christ friday october 18 2013 2 comments 22 june 2012 boarding house chronicles pt 3 scraps of food lay scattered all over the banggerahan in the dirty kitchen upon the sink there stood a small bucket of my san assorted biscuits now serving as a container of the rapid drips of water from the leaking faucet pipe i stayed on there for a while watching the droplets of water create an evanescent sound in the midst of the blabbing boarders the squealing pigs in the sty and the splashing of running water in the irrigation canal with less effort i placed the tray of toiletries on the banggerahan ignoring the nauseous leftovers i tore a sachet of toothpaste and begun brushing my teeth in alternate upward and sideward motion as a queer habit i counted every brush strokes i make it took me thirty quick brush strokes before i noticed the pinkish stains mixed on the foam of toothpaste on the sink i knew it was blood coming from my gums again only lighter this time i stared at the foam unwinkingly and the longer i gaze at it the more it looks like a cotton candy scant of food color suddenly i saw a silhouette of a man on the corner of my eyes i quickly rinsed my mouth with clean water and hastily washed away the foam of toothpaste on the sink when i looked up a tall and dark guy was standing by my side looking at me with a sinister smile are you going to a bloody battle why do you sharpen your teeth he asked in a swaggering manner it was the same funny and silly question i used to hear from my classmates back in high school his question neither moved my lips to fake a smile nor opened my mouth to utter a word because it really annoyed me i glared at him with sheer bravado and went on washing my face i wasn t sure if he intended to use the faucet after me or whatnot but he stood there motionless watching every movement i make aware of his watchful eyes i fidgeted with the water glass and dropped it lightly in the bucket i couldn t stare at his face because i m defiant to see the sinister smile i saw in him previously it really scared the heck out me i shut off the faucet arranged my toiletries on the tray and hurried upstairs without looking back i knew he was watching me while i was walking in haste and it s sick that i can t look back and glared at him again i entered my room and tried to recollect the uncomfortable moments i just spent in front of the sink it was an awkward encounter with a total stranger i suspected that he s a new boarder in the house i tried to remember the image of his face on my mind and i saw a mole below the right corner of his lower lip he reminded me of rocky salumbides a paragon blessed with good looks and a hot body i began to undress him in my thoughts i started on his plaided shirt on his cropped pants and his shoes i took off everything else on him until he s stark naked before my eyes suddenly i caught a glimpse of a huge rat bridging over the plywood partition of the rooms it stopped creeping on the corner and stared at me assessing my reaction perhaps i shifted my eyes and looked at the void of space outside the window i kept looking but not seeing that dirty huge rat enabled me to realize that my wandering thoughts are way too far fetched impure and perverted i pulled out a deep sigh picked up my phone opened and shut the door and went directly downstairs fonzi christ friday june 22 2012 no comments 08 june 2012 boarding house chronicles pt 2 the cool breeze diffused into the bamboo knitted walls of the room prickled the soles of my feet like frozen water the clanking of the water pump beneath the window and the small rush of water from its shaft is a wakeup call to the snoring occupants of the room the boisterous roars of three wheeled vehicles can be heard against the sound of the window hinges swinging back and forth apparently it s 6 o clock but i lingered in my bed with relish for comfort the wind is unusually cool i prognosticate that it will rain today i pulled the covers upward and hid my eyes to hinder the first ray of sunlight that slipped through the window i heard fast and heavy footsteps on the narrow and rickety staircase then i heard three softy knocks on the door it was jake the tall and dark guy i met in the dirty kitchen last week mayor may i borrow your broom he asked with a hoarse voice suggesting that he d just waken up i was elected mayor of the boarding house organization and everyone else here had since branded me with that title i kinda like the authority i am holding now when i ask them to fetch me water in the bathroom they instantly do without any trouble but it s pathetic to think that they only obey me because i am the eldest boarder in the house mayor your broom thanks jake drawled out no problem i replied what time are you gonna hit the school today ahm later at 9 30 i guess he muttered with his lips partly closed those lips unusually wet all the time which formed a sinister smile last week had become stirring provoking and tempting it lured me to savor its freshness it kept me slack jawed drooling over it it drove me nuts we discussed about random things yesterday under the indian mango tree at the backyard we talked about the viciousness of the school its lapses in following its established protocol its amenity and the people in it it gave me a brain fart moment discussing these things with him he told me insolently about his misdemeanors in the classroom at the maritime education department he would yell at the teacher if he found the latter ridiculously disturbing i thought this guy has an ego way too big for him he seriously needed his butt paddled up because it s obvious that it was never done to him growing up we talked about other things like our interests and guilty pleasures he mentioned that he loves harry potter and narnia movies he even kept a complete collection at home his confession vastly surprised me because at the way he behaves anyone would expect that this guy watches robin padilla movies i like his fashion too i would always see him wear crumpled faded jeans and shirts with cool appliqués on them he has piercings on his ears on his nose and on his private parts of course i wouldn t know that if he hadn t told me i just didn t know what struck me but it gave me goose bumps knowing these flimsy sleazy things about him i hear a lot from my board mates that i m becoming unusually closer to him jake might have heard this too but it seems that he s way too oblivious of the hearsay i wish to have more placid moments with him in the future under the shade of the indian mango tree at the backyard the next time it ll happen again the moon should be visible on the star studded sky and the land breeze drifting the weeds on the meadow fonzi christ friday june 08 2012 no comments 24 may 2012 brave face he held his red canvas bag and swung it across his slender shoulder on the right and bolted like a dalmatian found a good bone reaching the metal handle of the glass door he strode in a haughty catwalk style his jaguar stilettos hammered the concrete floor in a resonating sound at every even step he made random students in all white tucked uniform herded together at the student lounge glanced at him as if scrutinizing his stature he is tall and lean his hair almost gray his lashes flutter and his voice shrills he gazed at the uniformed students sternly i rushed to the glass door and called for him before he could cross the pavement to the techno building kling come back hurry he pivoted gracefully and went back gliding like a punk on his skateboard imbierna i have a class at 3 00 it s a quarter left you re keeping me late you faggot he exclaimed he s always full of bravado and conceit when he speaks sometimes i take time to question myself how much backbone does this guy hold to produce such a scornful voice he looks so different almost unpleasant but he behaves like he s on a platform and i on the ground floor i met him last month when i joined the university student council he s from the legislative and i m from the executive though i ve been seeing him around since last semester it never occurred to me that we can be this close like we are now those times i treated him like a grotesque thing to behold his skin looks like that of a long tailed reptile coarse and oddly white spotted for some time i thought he s a nauseous thing to stand close by but recently my treatment of him has become warmer and more civil i learned that his skin imperfection is a disease not a communicable so it s safe to allow my skin brushes his he suffered a huge deal of sarcasm and humiliation growing up but it didn t get the better of him instead he stood still and proud intimidating the boneheads who ridiculed him it s just a matter of bravery and contempt he said once if you don t correct them when they upset you they ll never learn to treat you with respect true that sometimes you have to be brave even if it s just pretended courage if that requires people to treat you their equal the preamble did not speak of a humane society with savage people living on it life is not fair outside but you have to fend it off every time i look at klein i think about strange things strange but prevailing things his guts hid his imperfections it s amazing how he did even that i remember him telling me about his embarrassing tete a tete with a college dean last year you are so dumb she cursed him that s what he prized after creating a fiasco as a facilitator in a quiz bee during the intrams he was shrinking like a balloon belching all its air i can t tell whether he told me the real thing that happened between them or not but during that moment i lost one strand of respect from the ex dean never before have i thought such a high paid teacher brand a student as dumb kling s condition already decimates his confidence and telling him he s dumb would crush even more whatever amount of hope he had all his life she is awful and i m serious about that conviction i have my own share of embarrassment once when i consulted her about my overlapping class schedules she hasn t driven me bonkers when she told me i m a nuisance i didn t despise her for that but she scared the heck out of me klein must have felt the same terror i gotta go i ll be back in a bit though bye girl he uttered his eyes darted across the glass sliding window he left the office his stilettos hammered the concrete floor and echoed his steps outside the half closed glass door he is oddly looking he flutters pulses when he talks certainly he s one hell of a daring guy fonzi christ thursday may 24 2012 no comments 19 may 2012 boarding house chronicles i tore the business gazette cover leaf and fanned the embers in the coal stove the motion disturbed the subtle ashes scared it away like a swarm of flies whipped by a stiff twig i added cold coals in the stove and set the rice pot on it then i went on a corner of the kitchen and sat on a wood bench beside the kitchen table i watched the boys intently doing a rough workout with dumbbells i could see the moist of perspiration running down against their brown skin towards their half naked bodies it gave me a grave feeling of nausea looking at their bodies wetted by sweat i couldn t bear the sight of them so i stood up and approached the stove again to examine the ashes interspersed among the cold coals and crumpled papers jake stirred the noodles in h...