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Text of the page (random words):
as the a b c song or twinkle twinkle little star eventually we learned the jump rope ditties required to be a part of the playground scene beyond the pledge of allegiance most students balk at the notion of memorizing anything ask your kids to commit a poem to memory and prepare to hear a loud chorus of groans and moans high school students who know every lyric of the most obscure and absurd songs ever written still claim that being required to memorize poetry is brutal punishing and offensive in ways that defy description this is likely because it requires such exhausting tasks as reading and concentration they don t know what they are missing words are powerful and words that rhyme are magical poetry connects us in our marrow you never know whose cells share your poetic dna until some serendipitous event occurs for example take the night my husband and i were in a restaurant with our good friends dave and betty when my husband used the phrase there are strange things done dave and i simultaneously and without further prompting launched into a recitation of the cremation of sam mcgee given that my hubby had unwittingly offered up its opening line dave and i amused ourselves and amazed ourselves at how automatically it spewed forth our respective spouses jaws dropped they could not have regarded us with more disbelief if we had picked up straw hats and canes and done an old fashioned buck and wing across the dining room floor in striped blazers and straw hats i couldn t recall as many of its verses as dave could so i eventually looked up the old poem and set about memorizing it all over again if it ever comes up in the future i want to be ready the competitor in me wants to be able to match him line for line and i found once again that for pure satisfaction not much can beat memorizing poetry i originally learned that work of robert w service in the tenth grade english class of a wonderfully earnest and enthusiastic teacher she inspired students to learn the poem came back readily and i took pleasure in re learning it that competitive side of me which certain small minded people sometimes describe as cutthroat can only hope that at some future trivia competition they ask for the name of the derelict boat in this poem look it up i confess that these days my personal preference is to read the work of our former poet laureate billy collins he can make me laugh till i hurt my stomach muscles who knew i had any and he can stop my heart with a simple poignant line oh to write like billy collins now the famed former first daughter of camelot caroline kennedy has published a book titled poems to learn by heart it s filled with a hundred poems for children and adults to take in and enjoy huzzah so it s not only baby boomers who enjoy this secret pleasure five or six years ago my first and oldest friend then aged 101 years mentioned in a letter that she always recited the day is done by longfellow at bedtime she did so because her late husband had done so before going to sleep each night this simple nightly ritual clearly made her feel closer to him and somehow eased the pain of losing him of course that compelled me to seek out the day is done so that i too could recite it to myself at bedtime spiritually connecting me to my dear friend she left this world a few years ago at age 102 but i recite it still and keep her in my heart poor mick he was just memorizing the wrong stuff posted by leah rubin at 5 00 am 6 comments labels billy collins caroline kennedy mick jagger rolling stones monday may 6 2013 paula poundstone made me do it here is a golden oldie from the early days of funny is the new young walk back in time with me paula poundstone made me do it you know some things that are just fine in the privacy of one s own home should not be done in public places i m usually pretty tuned in to the proprieties of basic good manners and common sense but in the past few days i ve succumbed to some social pressure i ll explain in a moment and i ve been doing it in the customer lounge at my car dealer just an oil change thanks for asking and in the waiting room at my dermatologist s office just a check up thanks for your concern what am i doing i m reading paula poundstone s very funny book there s nothing in this book that i meant to say the pressure it s due back at the library tomorrow the problem i can t control my laughter now there was a time when i didn t find paula poundstone funny at all but in the past few years hearing her on wait wait don t tell me the npr news quiz i have developed a full appreciation of her humor i look forward to her appearances and she never fails to crack me up i ve pretty much learned to time my coffee sips to avoid her input so as to keep from squirting coffee out my nose ouch please don t laugh it s happened more than once okay more than twice now i m reading this book and i can t renew it because it s on hold by another probably selfish patron so i ve taken it with me to the oil change and the skin screening i can tell you that several customers of my car dealer moved to the other side of the room when i 1 couldn t control my laughter and 2 i was continually doubled over clutching my sides now i was able to keep silent so maybe they thought i was sobbing to myself but i guess it wasn t pretty it rarely is anyway they were sure to establish distance in the doctor s office there were only a couple of other people both older looking men both dressed casually and both successfully ignoring me or perhaps they feared that i was some psychopath about to burst into a hellish rage and felt that their best hope for safety was to feign ignorance well feign away boys i may be crazy but i don t act on it i m just laughing with not at paula i m not sure where she gets these thoughts but i m pretty sure they re not normal but then again maybe normal is just a setting on your dryer in any case i d love to know what makes her tick she finds a funny way to look at life s ordinary events and is able to ask questions we wouldn t have thought of on our own with her to guide us we learn about the civil war helen keller charles dickens the wright brothers joan of arc and more yes she explores all of these topics and more in her book and you wouldn t believe some of the great and questionable stuff you ll learn the real lesson though is to keep the hilarity at home it s much safer there and then you won t have to wonder why the dermatologist put you in restraints posted by leah rubin at 8 13 am 6 comments labels laughter paula poundstone wednesday september 19 2012 son of coincidence so remember that whole coincidence post from a couple of months ago the one where weird names kept coming up in clumps after an absence of thirty some years or an author i learn about for the first time then presents himself in an e mail from a totally unrelated third party and i recognize that an actress i see on tv must be the daughter of meryl streep because of the uncanny resemblance and almost simultaneously the girl is being quoted in a magazine article i was reading during the commercials yeah those coincidences get ready it s happened again and again a few weeks ago my husband the center of the universe cotu and i were watching an episode of american pickers if you re not familiar with it let me say that two guys from iowa mike and frank drive around in a big van looking for the ultimate yard sale actually most of the time they find people who ve been collecting stuff for years and have buildings just chock full of old collectibles mike and frank buy the stuff to sell in their shop or to customers they ve developed over the years back at the shop danielle finds them leads and manages to hold the fort while the guys are on the road cotu and i get a big charge out of seeing what they find and watching them arrive at a deal with the sellers cotu didn t want to watch it at first probably because we are both such pack rats and this hits a little close to home hey at least we re not on hoarders i had to persuade him that since the show is on the history channel it must be vaguely educational anyhoo on this particular day mike and frank were on the road and danielle was actually taking a little vacation to new york the guys had convinced her to take something with her that they bought on an earlier pick it s a papier mâché model of a cat from the alice in wonderland sculpture in central park ultimately dani like we re bffs now meets with the widow of the sculptor he was jose de cleeft she is lorrie goulet and arranges to have the cat displayed in a new york museum where there s a current show of goulet s work this was all so very cool dani meets artist artist sees cat cat vacations on display nice but back to my story so i may be a little old midwesterner but i ve been to new york numerous times and have also been to central park many times i have never let me repeat that for emphasis why else would i repeat it never seen or heard of the alice in wonderland sculpture don t know why i m sure that if my relatives really did love me they would have taken me to see it when i visited them in new york but alas i was quite surprised to learn of its existence the very next day cue the twilight zone theme music i was reading a book that i had heard about on what else npr fresh air to be exact it s called what happened to sophie wilder by christopher beha on page 118 sophie and her husband are walking in central park and stop at the alice in wonderland sculpture they have a major heart to heart there hmm i thought that s funny coming just a day after i first heard about the sculpture fast forward less than a week done with sophie wilder on to gone girl by gillian flynn amazing by the way yep page nineteen i ve barely cracked the spine of the book and nick is growling about amy expecting him to remember that it s a favorite of hers since childhood this is all pretty woo woo if you ask me three slaps in the face with the same reference within a single week i m not sure i believe in coincidence but i do believe in alice at least now i do i keep dreaming of tea parties and going down the rabbit hole or maybe that was the political conventions posted by leah rubin at 5 00 am 37 comments labels alice in wonderland american pickers artist christopher beha danielle frank fresh air gillian flynn gone girl lorrie goulet mike npr sculpture the history channel what happened to sophie wilder thursday september 13 2012 is it stupid in here or is it just me yes i know it s been hot not just here but all over the united states so indeed it is hot in here and it s not just me but i m asking about stupid not hot as in how is it possible that a clerk at the deli counter of a prominent food selling establishment doesn t know what three quarters of a pound means you think i m joking or judging harshly but i recently was waited on by a perfectly nice young woman who ably served up a pound of sliced turkey she then politely asked if there was anything else she could get for me i d like three quarters of a pound of the roast beef i answered she hesitated just a touch but i caught it i thought maybe she hadn t heard me but she didn t ask me to repeat it she just reached her vinyl gloved hand into the deli case and pulled out a wad of sliced beef plunk it said as it hit the scale weighing in at 38 lbs how s that she asked no i replied three quarters of a pound now convinced she had indeed not heard me the first time then it came oh that s more than a pound right ruh roh now i get an academy award nomination for being kind and supportive and helpful when i wanted to do a johnny carson spit take and ask her how she could have possibly graduated high school without knowing how much three quarters of a pound is it s actually less than a pound your scale will read point seven five i told her okay whatever she answered and ultimately came up with the meat whatever my confidence in our education system dropped several points in that exchange the very next day i noticed on my visa bill that a subscription i ve carried for years suddenly went from 32 a month to 42 a month since my public school education took place in the 1960s i saw right away that that was approximately a 30 jump i called their customer service line to find out why the lad michael clearly unhappy with his career choice sullenly told me that it was because my special offer rate had expired i informed him that i had been a subscriber for over 30 years and didn t have a special offer rate i could bore you with the repetition of our respective positions which went on for a while but i ll spare you finally i believe i outwitted michael who to be fair seemed to be unarmed in a battle of wits i asked him if there were any special offer rates currently in effect i ll check he offered yes i can give it to you for 3 77 a week which would be 16 34 a month again thanks to the educational standards of the 60s i could see that this was preferable to spending 42 a month sold i said and my third and final example due only to the space limitations of this column of the decline of intelligence and common sense in our civilization comes all the way from london according to an article in the associated press a man there started a major fire in his apartment by attempting to dry two pairs of boxers and socks in his microwave the appliance was destroyed and the apartment suffered serious smoke damage is this so hard a concept food in microwave clothes in dryer in london i guess it s hot and stupid posted by leah rubin at 5 00 am 8 comments labels appliance billing deli counter microwave newspaper scale smoke damage stupid telemarketer weigh older posts home subscribe to posts atom subscribe to posts atom posts all comments atom all comments about me leah rubin late to the party vertically challenged right handed semi retired apparently hyphenated female i m still trading on my 2008 first place win of the erma bombeck writing competition since it s an every other year event i m still technically the reigning champion so i have given myself permission to flaunt it a while longer in the interest of full disclosure i should say that i asked my husband to re work the photo of me in the banner to remove ten years from my neck thank you nora ephron i also asked him to whiten my teeth but he pointed out that my teeth weren t showing always a stickler for details now the photo here in the sidebar should have been filtered heavily or shot through gauze but alas it is your basic wysiwyg of the aging process what was i thinking view my complete profile words of wisdom thanks nancy my la di dah award i give good blog my award thanks jennymac you rock the sitsa girls subscribe via email enter your email address delivered by feedburner followers subscribe now feed icon subscribe in a reader subscribe to posts atom posts all comments atom all comments my blog list airing my dirty laundry one sock at a time moving a packrat from the college dorm ...