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ords her that sense in some ways this is just the same as i have been doing in baking with her but in a context which is for the family for that body to whom she belongs i want for her to be developed in a sense of her importance and a sense of her worthiness senses which most foundationally are built within the biological family i would go to lengths to ensure that sense of worthiness to provide for it and if it needs be to welcome it back in and restore it just as the father did in the parable of the prodigal son because she is worthy of being valued and honored for all that she in herself is worth when the new testament scriptures say it is to the father s glory that the son be lifted up i kind of see that now no other work save that work which makes for my child to be built up in all that she is and to be able to be all she is fully able to be is higher no other work is worth her and she worth all the work in this is the father heart of god for us all and what a babe in a manger should remind us of blue santa december 20 2017 kevinjdaniel leave a comment so this past saturday my family and i elected to do blue santa a tradition started back in the 70 s by two austin texas police officers since the inception the event has become an organized and massive undertaking well orchestrated somehow through signing up or through being signed up by a teacher children get to give the police department a christmas list the lists are collected items purchased directly off the list and then boxed for delivery on the day of the event volunteers from officers and their families to community members at large arrive in a long line extending for blocks the volunteer drives up gets a box and an address and is sent on their way i ll be entirely honest i looked forward to this event more than to my own children s christmas morning maybe it is just the place i was in maybe it is something more something about the happiness that comes of being able to bring happiness sounds selfish but only because i can barely grasp at how to describe the joy of seeing goodness received i suspect it is an onion skin slice of heaven rejoicing in the goodness of goodness this year i wanted for my children to be part of this more so than i had in years past i wanted for my children this joy of rejoicing in goodness in the something outside of merely the consumerist receiving i have seen however my daughter s driving delight in giving gifts this year and the delight in being the one to wrap the presents all herself so i am pretty sure that what i wanted for them through doing blue santa she was already experiencing in her gift shopping for her mother and i it was a choice this year between this event and going to a retreat we normally attend this retreat for all intents and purposes is like going to extended family it is put on by a community associated with our church via some long standing members of both communities and is entirely geared towards praying and living towards reconciliation between catholic orthodox protestant and messianic jewish streams of christianity their annual advent retreat involves among so much more candle making which the children love as it turns out there would have been the opportunity to attend the retreat some 40 miles away for a period of time at least after we delivered the presents i had half thought to maybe make the effort to do so my daughter however was developing a migraine and was really wanting to rest she had been a trooper all morning ready to be a part and asking to carry the box upstairs or to the door of the recipients we went to two homes here s the thing i wanted for my daughter the space to rest the release from doing christmas time is tiring quite honestly and i cherish the time spent around her within her presence i had no need for her to have to do anything on my account there was in heart for her a release from doing and a thankfulness for her having been such a trooper earlier indeed i was thankful beyond measure she participated and wanted whatever honoring of her efforts which she wanted that was why i was willing to go to the retreat in the first place i think the father heart of god is seen for me in this moment this picture of my thankfulness to my children for their participating in my undertakings invariably so i would say is this the case he wants the good and is thankful for the participation baking with dear old dad december 12 2017 kevinjdaniel leave a comment last saturday was a full day for my daughter with the day starting off with her third horseback riding lesson then a friend s birthday party a little later honestly when i consider what really speaks to her core sense of worth i think perhaps a previous day s efforts to run to the store to acquire items needed for a father daughter baking session made for more quality time together i at least felt more life and life filled connection with her in that moment of baking muffins for her classroom potluck it was life being lived together simple and non complex but thoroughly enjoyable however horseback riding lessons are fun in their own right and how much they play into developing her core person a la indulging her core interests i don t guess i have to know about right now it is helping develop her sense of being around an animal she necessarily has to develop trust and respect for which i can see translating into future work in animal rescue and even if we don t do animal rescue as a career at all horseback lessons are still valuable and maybe a quick reader will pick up on the question here am i doing what is most profitable for my daughter in terms of building up her person and spending myself in the having of best possible life and time together i suppose i could have written a whole post on the significance of baking those chocolate chip muffins together i could have written on how i let her lead on the recipe choice and followed her into her project electing to drive her to the store and then to serve her in the baking chore all as an effort to build her sense of worth by being servant in a project for which she led out on how this revealed father heart sees a set of significances to a project only to then swell with pride over a child s accomplishments the reality of which were entirely contingent on things for which only i could have done for her how this is entirely a picture of the father heart of god for us i could write and should and maybe just did but there s more that i want to say here there is no other motivation in the father heart than that which is for the child it is wanting for the child all the love the honor the care due the child beyond even what the child has wrought for itself or could under it s own ability there is a carving out of space for more honor or recognition of the child where that honor and the parental effort may overlap i was motivated by time spent with my child the opportunity to make the most of a moment wherein the project of the classroom dessert potluck mattered to my child and reflected socially upon her the afternoon after the potluck i was near craven to know if the other kids loved the muffins my daughter had made thrilled those children would think she was amazing for her baking a parent motivated by how they themselves appear for their efforts misses more than the mark because they have lost the life found of enjoying the moment spent with the child and lost the moment of rejoicing for the child in the reception of their efforts baking with auntie november 28 2017 kevinjdaniel leave a comment part of the time spent time with my sister over the thanksgiving holiday was understandably time spent preparing the meal my sister was making my favorite dessert pineapple upside down cake it turned out in place of the traditional pies normally served with the meal and my daughter got the chance to aide her in the baking process if you are a regular ready of the blog you ll know that baking is one of my daughter s beloved pastimes it was understood i suppose at some point in the planning of the visit the opportunity for both of them to bake together was available i don t recall exactly what i do recall is that it is and was then extremely important to me that my daughter got to share a beloved activity with her aunt my daughter is more than her relationship with me she is that very hub of all her relationships which make her her more saliently however this relationship with my sister is something i want for her as a thing so right so good it goes without saying she my daughter should have that relationship for herself part of my daughter s being and part of her identity is who she is as defined by others aside from myself point blank categorically let me say that there is no way denying my daughter this greater body of relationship here with extended family isn t selfish on my part put simpler without any double negative artifice it is only selfless parenting by me when i allow and even seek out my daughter s sharing in beloved experience with a greater body of extended family not cloistering her solely within my influence were i in all my limited ability to want to be the only source of identity impartation or personal enrichment i would be acting not for her but for myself alone i want my daughter enriched and expanded in her being and identity there in that place of extended family surely that is a picture of the selfless father heart of god for us at least a picture of his seeking the opportunity of our persons beyond our persons for his own identity furthermore the rejoicing in that selfless act for what such interaction brings my daughter and my sister is entirely in line with the father heart of god as is a mourning in the loss or absence of said same it turns out rather happily for me my sister is able to approximate the way my mother and grandmother cook the dessert and now my daughter knows whatever little trick they have had only my daughter been able to learn from my paternal grandmother the making of her famous scrambled egg sandwich then my gastronomical life would be nigh complete completion would only come with learning my maternal grandmother s secret for frying okra and now i am off to go eat gingerbread prophecies november 23 2017 kevinjdaniel leave a comment it s the thanksgiving break my children having had a whole week off from school today is actually thanksgiving itself and the second of three dinners of this holiday now wrapped up the first such dinner was with my maternal family in my hometown at our family ranch held earlier in the week prior to the actual holiday part of that visit involved while on the way through town stopping in at their workplace to see my father s widow my stepmother and my half sister it was a happy occasion to see them and i was filled with thanksgiving for the friendship of both the experience was very much a small homecoming and i liken this to the open and accepting embrace long ago offered in my father s last words of blessing to me my thoughts or my feelings tarry at moments in remembrance of those few moments of reunion likening them to that first homecoming which shall occur when the elect come finally to the long awaited fatherland of our lord while at the family ranch my wife and children got to enjoy quality time with my sister and her family in an experience which has been repeated after varying fashions all my life and now theirs indeed and of late but especially in this extended filial context i have been considering the future lives of my children and their families just as i have straddled two worlds all my life that of small town rural life and that of urban life so my thoughts straddle the intellectual landscapes of the not yet eternity and the present continual temporary at some point the meeting with my stepmother had me thinking of my father s blessing to me and whether i might one day give such a parting blessing to my daughter i suspect that rumination might be the basis for living forwardly but this is a thought for another time before even this vacation week began and all the preparations were being made in my mind a regular trip to the store had found me looking forward to this vacation week and the time with my children this week would allow me i purchased a single gingerbread house kit for both children to work on together while i was eagerly looking forward to the concentrated time with the children and gingerbread house making has become something of an ad hoc family tradition this time of year my purchasing the kit really only had my children s delights in mind i wasn t intentionally perpetuating a family tradition though the desire to do so always hovers at the periphery of my heart no i was more aiming at providing for my children something i knew they delighted in and found to be significant even actively seeking to so provide before they asked in this way my heart inclines to my children in moments away from them as with them and i knew providing this kit in advance was a sort of going before and preparing the way even for what they find important to them note this is beyond even my thoughts of its significance as a family tradition when the opportunity finally presented itself which is to say when all the traveling had subsided and the numerous tasks been sufficiently completed i released the kit and thus the task or the experience to my daughter s hands to do with as she pleased my son decided it was not worth trying to work with her lol so it became all her project she didn t feel the need for my help and so the thing was given to her to enjoy and do with as she pleased there is on one level a delicious symbolizing of all my thoughts of her future in the picture i have in my mind of her building this house a symbolizing by which i just can t help but be bemused suffice it to say this willing and desiring and forward thinking heart of a father which lovingly goes before and enables that opportunity and experience for his children which he knows they desire as significant beyond what he desires for them is very much a picture of the father heart of god for us all as an afterthought this thanksgiving it could be considered is a remembrance of all that the lord has done in terms of going forward in advance to prepare the way for us and for which i we now rejoice and give thanks thus doubly a thanksgiving in many levels for me at least and especially as my thoughts turn back and forth between the now and the not yet backgrounds november 16 2017 kevinjdaniel leave a comment local art galleries and artists partner together every year in this area roughly the same weekend each year to put on an event wherein the public can move through the studios and meet the artists and view their work it is something like a pub crawl for art galleries in years past i have led tours for our art group in this event and have frequented galleries with couple friends and their children it is an event which stirs my creative soul t...