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lead my skeptic sight skip to main skip to sidebar lead my skeptic sight the best is yet to come there s reason to believe i stood on the porch at 11 58 that night i had battled giants scaled immense heights watched my victories crumble into defeats fought for loves i did not know and suffered for causes i did not understand that year was kinda the same like the wanderer stopping at his shrine to offer prayer and rest weary limbs i walked outside and looked out over the city that i had loved so dearly and wished so fiercely would love me back i saw the lights in the valley and the colors in the sky i heard the words and chords in my ears and felt december s tears sting my cheeks with january s chill and i thought as i turned the volume up yeah maybe this year will be better than the last 0 comments you hold that thought 0 comments that can happen this weekend i watched a show about people who get what they want in order to get what they want they have to perform a task and it might be really hard or evil or it might just seem that way to the person who has to do it and they might change wants halfway through or the want might start coming true as the task is performed but the one thing they all do is want something i don t know what i want but i keep performing anyway 0 comments you re gonna carry that weight dear everything i am marginally good at someday you and i are going to have a long talk about why you don t pay very much money and why all your jobs are too far away and why you won t give me any of them regards shums 0 comments drumroll please i never go to weddings i m not like morally opposed to them or anything i think they re a pretty big deal i just never go i guess i do when it s family my cousin got married a few weeks ago and i went then but i left as soon as i could grateful to have the excuse of a work shift on a saturday night half an hour s drive away that one s easier to understand though i don t need a hundred questions from distant relations about the weight i ve put on and the bylines they never see in print because evidently the internet doesn t work in arizona and most of all why i haven t had one of these yet but i don t go to non family weddings either plenty of men in their late twenties see reception attendance as a chore but i honestly don t think i m one of them you get to wear a suit for one thing you get to see pretty girls in dresses for another there s cake and there s dancing and if the happy couple have any taste at all there s a live band playing jazz which is the only thing you should dance to in a suit anyway part of it is my schedule i know i m simply not available most nights and consequently sleeping most mornings so i don t bother asking when the blessed event is part of it is that these days i don t have many friends about whose nuptials i would give a crap the ones i did care about have long since passed along with our friendships and yes one cannot rule out a healthy dose of envy a dislike of the reminder that they know something i never have and that the money line isn t exactly trending in my favor you want to know the real reason i want to meet her there i want to catch her looking at me across a crowded chapel or ballroom or pavilion i want to walk over to her and ask her name and ask her to dance i want to hear my one and only love emerge from a saxophone sweet and breath filled as i take her hand i want my feet to be light and her eyes to shine and the world to slow to shimmer a crystalline memory imperishable coruscating lustrous clear i want that more than i can say and that s why i don t go 0 comments blue july i left home in a rainstorm one i ve needed for a while to wash away these sunny days and let me hide my smile so i put on my jacket and i slipped into my shoes the dark gray clouds i praised aloud for giving me the blues this morning i was lied to by someone i d never met and even though i let it go i can t seem to forget cause i can t help my nature wouldn t try to if i could in rain or sun i ll be the one don t matter if i should i hit the highway late tonight and met the open road the music played and lord how i prayed as the moon above me glowed when suddenly before me i saw the sweetest sight two lovers there in the summer air were kissing their goodnight i couldn t keep from smiling though sharp and true the pain it s been so long since i felt that strong but i ll feel that way again and i can keep on waiting cause i got nothing to lose and darling i will thank july for giving me the blues 1 comments so i ll bury every clue everything s a memory 0 comments older posts subscribe to posts atom this is me shums hi i m a lot like you view my complete profile find me here twitter facebook bitmob deseret news slc dunk casanova frankenstein back issues 2013 1 january 1 there s reason to believe 2012 14 september 1 august 2 july 2 june 3 may 1 april 1 march 3 february 1 2011 10 december 1 november 2 october 2 september 1 august 3 april 1 2010 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beautiful in a small town 11 years ago rebecca s blog architecture snobs 12 years ago still no roses black is the color of my true love s hair 12 years ago the sidecar my unicorn name is 12 years ago what it all looks like mooooved 12 years ago s h u m w a y i can t believe i have two year olds 13 years ago the luxury life check that 14 years ago go ahead and read it the temple of jimmer from the church history museum 14 years ago let it be linds life update 14 years ago some call me pilmer state of the jazz address 15 years ago posts from the shower the naming of a child 15 years ago j dawg s pop blog cowboys aliens trailer brings me out of blog oblivion 15 years ago up away xkcd lampoon 15 years ago it s not going as i planned wordpress 16 years ago a touch of unreality shaq fu 17 years ago cupcake royale the peanut speaks isn t that everything aaron falk the memoir of morinar love is the answer quod erat demonstrandum thursdays mystery meat for your reader posts atom posts all 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