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fort zone to identify with the protagonists i can not wait to read the next book in the series overall a very powerful and gripping tale with well developed characters and interesting perspectives standard posted in reviews tagged book review 0 comments 03 06 14 by araldia women in autism research autism conference london i am currently sat in a conference about women and autism set in international women s week being an adult female with autism doesn t normally bother me i would go as far as to say i love being me my autism gives me a perspective on the world that helps me make better sense of things than people around me however today i feel my autism the conference opened with a welcome by deepa korea deepa is the chief executive of research autism and has an extensive past with public and private bodies professor terrry brugha gave an interesting talk about the research he has been leading into identifying autism in the general female population they began by screening about 7500 randomly assigned households with a questionnaire based on popular autism diagnosis questions a subset scoring higher than a cutoff were then questioned again with a more targeted questionnaire the research found that the incidence of autism in the general population as tested with these standard tests does tend to reflect the rates given in clinical settings with regards to per capita and gender ratio the second set of speakers were students and staff from the limpsfield grange school in surrey these strong and smart young girls are fortunate enough to be in a very special school indeed this school accepts them as they are they have made a video about being a girl on the spectrum and how they feel they are different but equal this video and the talk with it perfectly fielded by the young women reduced me to a quivering wreck i lost all my coping strategies one by one as i contrasted their experiences with my own normally i can deal very well with public situations but as i saw these vibrant friendly accepted individuals so content with their school and friendships and so positive about their autism i fell apart by the time the break came i was unable to even ask people to move out of the way so i could escape for a smoke i lost the power to look at people to articulate to do anything other than stand frozen surrounded by a hubbub of autism professionals looking like a scared rabbit looking for a bolt hole thankfully a young girl who i later found out was on the spectrum herself identified my issue and said excuse me to create a gap for me i ran through it to freedom and only realised what she had done when i reached the quiet outside i tried to talk with her and her mum when i came back in but i totally broke down no one had ever done that for me before no one saw understood and acted without a second thought it s after lunch now and several outbursts of quiet tears later i am coping ok with the other talks sometimes it takes a random act of kindness to reduce you to your core but it has made such an impact that i will remember this girl for a long long time standard posted in aspergers aspie musings tagged aspie conference 0 comments 03 01 14 by araldia book review dark luminance by e m mcdowell i have been recently reading books without reading the synopsis i find it gives me a much more anticipatory buzz and stops me looking for how a book fits into neat little boxes dark luminance fiction captured my attention immediately with the principal character and his friends in a cliffhanging situation this book deals with many themes including love found and lost quantum mechanics life after death and existentialism without knowing the plot outline beforehand i was gripped by the story and i need the next book in the series so badly the initial chapters contain a small amount of technical explanation but this doesn t detract from the story and does not need to be understood however from my recollection of this part of science in my studies there was nothing that made me think oh come on like i find occurring with so many modern day authors i don t think my last paragraph truly conveys what the content is about but then i don t want to ruin the joy i experienced for other people if you are looking for a very smart fast paced science fiction novel where the characters are multi dimensional and clever then this is a good call dark luminance is available in paperback and ebook forms from amazon and barnes and noble standard posted in reviews tagged book review fiction 0 comments 02 27 14 by araldia deaspification the coping strategy rituals i often find myself lost in thought last week the gas engineer came out to check our house complies with the gas regulations for the next year in terms of equipment safety they have serviced the boiler every year since we have been here they are a great couple he works she organises and they are funny professional and just generally good people but as i sat waiting for them to arrive i caught myself going through the deaspification ritual that i assume is part of my coping mechanisms deaspification is a temporary condition caused by having to interact with people not on the spectrum who you don t want to give you the but you seem fine speech i m not sure how to put it in words talking about this is new to me so i will just do my best like a good ex guiding movement gal my internal dialogue floods with questions to myself can you remember their coffee preferences black with none and white with one i think wrong here black with three and white with two for future reference but at least it opened the conversation people who do not have an autistic spectrum disorder like to think they are memorable if you can go that extra step and remember names and two or three information bits then you are on track for being deaspificated what can i remember about these people coffee preferences the wife makes lace in her spare time the son was going to come in the business the husband has an intermittent bad back now i have little things that make them feel i remember them and i am interested enough to store away things about them it gives me conversation openers and the coffee one gives me an excuse to get out of the room this gives me the initial space to flap mentally about the fact that there are people in my house that don t live here it gives me the time to recompose myself and plan my next conversation i don t need to initiate conversation but if spoken to i can use one of my three other bits of information to divert attention from myself phone rings they have been held up on an emergency will come tomorrow breathe relax feel strange when you have focused all your energies expecting something to happen and preparing for it its hard to let that go and move on it s almost as if you had waited in line for a ride at a theme park for several hours and right as you get to the gate they tell you it has shut and to come back next time you want to argue but know it is pointless you knew it was going to be a scary ride but you had psyched yourself up for it and not going on means that the thought of queueing tomorrow is worse than the actuality will be another situation someone is being treated unfairly and is unable to represent them self to the various agencies that need to be coordinated on my day to day existence i avoid contact with authorities i couldn t function buying goods at a shopping checkout without a huge amount of prep time but it is easier somehow to slip into the role of being an advocate for someone else the problems are not mine so i do not have that emotional investment about what happens if i mess up and i am safe in the knowledge that even if i don t help much it s still more than the person would manage alone it is all about roles about acting i know i can pass as a simulacrum of myself or the version of myself that i let others outside of my immediate family see my parents and most friends do not know me they know the me they see they don t see the bare me that my husband lives with they don t see the even barer me that is evident when i choose not to keep the coping strategies turned on they see the deaspification model the sum of the learnt behaviours the situation analyst the outcome of many failed attempts standard posted in aspergers aspie musings tagged aspergers coping strategies deaspification 0 comments 02 23 14 by araldia book review the dreamwalker bishop l williams c witch lake chronicles book 1 the dreamwalker is the first in a series of books set in a town called witch lake in north america it follows the central character sam through his adaption to returning to high school after being homeschooled for many years as if that wasn t hard enough sam is a little different to the other students as he has the ability to walk in other people s dreams this has the unfortunate side effect of any injuries he may experience in the dream world affecting his body physically he soon finds out that he s not the only strange one in the town making friends with rhionnan and nix who have their own sets of secrets the dreamwalker is perfectly aimed at the young adult supernatural fiction market but is written in such a way that it doesn t matter if you are older i found myself sneaking off away from my family to finish chapters and going to bed early just so i could read more there are a few errors not picked up at the proof stage but these in no way impact the thread of the book which develops in a way that is not immediately apparent from the earlier chapters the ending of this book in the series manages to provide the reader with closure while totally pulling the story out from under you in anticipation of the next book indeed within minutes of completing this book i was hunting on the website of the authors for the first chapter of the second book more information on the series and a scrapbook full of supplementary material can be found on the authors website the witch lake chronicles the book is available to purchase in electronic and paperback formats from a variety of retailers including amazon standard posted in reviews tagged book fiction review 0 comments 01 27 14 by araldia cooking for the lazy and poor i m not a great cook we have a kitchen about the size of one on a boat it just about fits a sink and drainer on one side and a washing machine and dryer on the other no room for a fridge that s currently living in what used to be a cupboard we don t have a working oven as if you use it the power trips out for the house i m also hampered by my aspergers and my suspected fibromyalgia i can t plan meals so that things are ready at the same time it hurts to be stood around while preparing and juggling different things at different times and the range of sensory issues in this house make it a nightmare from the outset take a nice simple spaghetti bolognese first fry the meat then remove half of the meat now add onions now separate the with onions and without onions into two add tomatoes to one with and one without now you have one meat no tomatoes no onions one meat with tomatoes no onions one meat and onions no tomatoes and one meat with onions and tomatoes it s just exhausting so i bought a slow cooker a while back and it fell out of favour but this week i made an effort to make sure my husband bought ingredients for it i started by using the mysupermarket app it allows me to build a shopping list compare it instantly with other supermarkets and then export it as a list lists are essential with an adhd husband they stop the hours of standing in the middle of the shop trying to remember what it was that was meant to be bought and also limits the i see it so i ll buy it tendency i did a search for some sensory friendly meals and decided that it appears to be meat joints or bust what s great about the crockpot is it s not an exact science you don t have to follow every step of a recipe even though my family are anti carrot they make a great base in the crockpot to stop the meat resting on the bottom of the pan quartered potatoes are also good if you are using a beef or pork joint you can buy cheap after cooking in the pot for 6 8 hours on low even the toughest joint is tender it s worth searing it in a pan first on all sides if possible you can cook baked potatoes at the same time by wrapping with foil and tucking around the sides of the joint the most successful one so far although so far everyone s eaten everything is the chicken chop up potatoes and or carrots and even onions for the base of the pot you need at least one root vegetable to ensure the meat is kept up when the veg cooks unwrap the whole chicken and remove any of the elastic straps and make sure the giblets are removed if you like these parts they can go in the bottom of the pot too to help make a chicken stock for another meal stuff the cavity with a pierced lemon stab an unpeeled lemon with a paring knife several times or whole onion peeled and with the top and tail removed add peeled garlic cloves if you want i tend to put a couple inside the chicken and some more tucked under the skin in places like the leg joints you can even put chunks of garlic butter under the skin tuck the wings back kinda make them into a triangle so they stay in place and put the whole chicken on the veg bed with the breast down this makes the white meat even more tender i tend to like putting a blend of herbs on paprika seems to be making it into every recipe at the moment along with garlic salt and flaked sea salt oregano is also good but basically add what you want or what you have got run the spice mix on add the wrapped baked potatoes and set on low for about 6 8 hours with most recipes i tend to count two hours on low as one hour on high so if times short you can cook on high for an hour or two and then the remainder of the time on low now leave don t fiddle opening the lid will slow the cooking down a lot you can check the temperature with a meat thermometer before serving or go with the poke with a skewer and check the juices run clear method not had too much luck with that though as the juices drain through the meat while cooking my usual method of testing the chickens done is attempt to pick chicken up by leg if leg comes off in your hand burning your fingers and splashing juice around inside the slow cooker it s probably done there should be enough meat after burning your fingers carving it don t expect slow cooker meat to be cuttable it tends to fall apart too easily to last two days please refrigerate responsibly standard posted in aspie tagged budget cooking 0 comments 01 26 14 by araldia i just can t see her i can see it now the way she tosses her hair when she is nervous the way her lips part briefly and her top teeth settle on her bottom lip when she is apprehensive the way her eyes widen as she tucks stray hair behind her ear when she is faced with a situation that challenged her perceptions the way she wrinkles her nose when she s amuse...