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rants of a diva march 2013 rants of a diva a blog currently wondering which of the one direction boys will take him home other obsessions hot boys britney spears the disney pop princesses french new wave cinema pages home index of film reviews wednesday march 6 2013 a preview of my screenplay if you ve been a follower of rants of a diva for awhile you may have noticed that posting has been a bit lax during the last year or so yeah sorry about that but rest assured there is a good reason for my absence i ve been working on my first screenplay titled the single one it s about a part time alcoholic in his mid 20 s wasting away in retail hell who finds himself involved in a love triangle with guys much older and younger than him as you can probably tell it s based in part on my life my favorite joke for awhile when people asked if i was basing it on my life was to reply no the character is 25 i m only 23 now that i m approaching 25 that joke isn t so funny anymore i m not completely finished yet i have to rewrite the climactic homage to the bachelor and the bobby soxer but i figured that after 18 months i have to share something with those of you who may or may not be sick to death of hearing me yammer on and on about it on twitter so i present you with the first scene s of the single one enjoy and let me know what you think the single one fade in ext townhouse day a picturesque spring morning birds chirp gaily little children are on the parking lot playing hopscotch another child is riding around on a tricycle ben bronze full time retail worker part time alcoholic in his mid 20 s walks out of his townhouse dressed in his work uniform of red polo and ink stained khakis he takes one step into the sunlight and winces ben ugh sunlight ben steps onto the sidewalk before he can take more than a couple steps the little kid on the tricycle zooms past unaware that he has just cut ben off ben doesn t say anything but he looks like he is suppressing the urge to flip over the kid s tricycle finally ben gets to his car he puts it in reverse and begins to move when he notices that the kids playing hopscotch are directly behind his car ben fucking monsters he honks the horn aggressively the kids look up and begrudgingly move ben pulls out and drives off ext bullseye day ben pauses at bullseye s front doors he looks up at the store s sign and sighs int front lanes ben walks up to his lane and turns on the light ben i can help whoever is next on lane he looks up at the lane light ben six cut to ben looks on in bewilderment as a customer throws cash at him like a stripper cut to another customer busy texting on her phone hands ben her credit card she does not notice that her hand is resting on the card reader ben er you can slide your card right there cut to 31 97 appears on the register agitated ben looks on as an old lady takes every piece of change out of her piece old lady i can never find a penny when i need one ben fakes a smile and nods old lady thank goodness there s no one behind me cut to ben s lane is deserted he steps in front of it to attract another customer an old man quickly approaches old man you look bored ben fakes a smile to the old man s face but rolls his eyes as soon as he turns away cut to ben your total is 198 75 would you like to open a credit the customer a middle aged man quickly interjects middle aged man no cut to a young man begins unloading his shopping cart onto the belt when he finds an item he doesn t want he shoves it in various places around the checklane on the ground in the candy on top of the pop coolers ben watches in morbid curiosity ben i ll take anything you don t want the young man sets his last item on the belt young man i m good now thanks cut to ben stares vacantly in space as a middle aged academic begins unloading his cart middle aged academic hey there ben looks up in recognition ben hi dr peters peters middle aged academic nice to see you are you doing okay ben yeah peters when do you finish up your master s ben i m already done i finished a couple years ago peters oh beat are you sure you re doing okay wordlessly ben nods and hands him the receipt dr peters walks away with a wave ben slumps over his register his head buried in his hands gabby o s if you got stabbed by an angry customer i am not cleaning that mess up i don t get paid enough ben looks up and sees gabby sassy mid 20 s take no prisoners he picks himself up and sighs ben i should be so lucky gabby slides into the lane next to him gabby at least you d get out of this shithole for a few hours a nauseatingly lovey dovey couple wanders through ben s lane on the way to the exit hands intertwined they stop repeatedly to kiss each other ben rolls his eyes at the display gabby someone s a bitter queen early today ben i m not bitter i just don t want their heterosexual lovefest thrown in my face gabby you d act the same way if you could find an interested man that is ben i m waiting for a man who has all the best features of the one direction boys louis s wit harry s dimples niall s innocence liam s seriousness and zayn s dreaminess sigh throughout this speech gabby rolls her eyes as if she s heard this all before gabby no wonder you re alone ben yeah well how s your relationship going gabby i m not so sure actually ron hasn t been responding to my texts lately we haven t seen each other much in the past week he said he has choir practice every night then when we do spend time together he can t even look me in the eye ben you don t think gabby nods gabby what in the hell else could it be it s a church choir they sing one damn hymn during service ben if you need me to help you catch him with his pants down i m totally there i don t even care if we end up in jail you re the mammy to my scarlett the morgan freeman to my jessica tandy the viola davis to my emma stone you re the sassy wise black person to my crazy white lady gabby and i thought that would be offensive ryan the jovial store manager approaches gabby s lane he speaks into a walkie ryan yeah i have her right here to gabby they re asking for you on the walkie gabby takes the walkie from ryan gabby this is gabby woman v o are you at the checklanes gabby yes woman v o good stay there gabby and ben share a look of confusion ben ultimately shrugs his shoulders in front of the checklanes a small group of people dressed in flashy choir robes appear one of them carries a boombox and presses play the beginning of beyonce s love on top is heard the choir members begin to sing and snap along with the song more choir members marching single file walk through the lanes on either side of ben and gabby ben what the fuck is going on gabby shakes her head out of nowhere ron a tall drink of water appears in front of the choir holding a microphone ron honey honey i can see the stars all the way from here can t you see the glow on the window pane i can feel the sun whenever you re here every time you touch me i just melt away angrily gabby steps out from her lane and walks toward ron gabby ron what the hell are you doing in reply he simply smiles grabs her hand and pulls her toward the middle of the scene ron now everybody asks me why i m smiling out from ear to ear nothing s perfect but it s worth it after fighting through my tears and finally you put me first gabby stands around not quite sure what to do feeling like a fool finally ron stops singing as the choir continues to produce background music ron gabby i love you with all my heart i want to spend the rest of my life with you as he gets down on one knee he pulls an object out of his pocket a ring box ben gabby oh my god ron gabby will you marry me gabby yes they embrace and start kissing the choir sings the chorus choir baby it s you you re the one i love you re the one i need you re the only thing i see c mon baby it s you you re the one that gives it all you re the one that always calls when i need you everything stops finally you put my love on top all ben can do at this scene is stare his jaw hanging wide open ben what posted by dame james at 6 30 pm 1 comment newer posts older posts home subscribe to posts atom forget eve it s all about me dame james kalamazoo michigan united states a child of marx and coca cola who strives to be dame judi dench when he grows up or kristen stewart i haven t decided yet view my complete profile contact me email rantsofadiva at yahoo dot com facebook twitter recent film screenings cleanflix andrew james joshua ligairi 2009 b dr kildare s strange case harold s bucquet 1940 c pitch perfect jason moore 2012 c les misérables tom hooper 2012 d nobody lives forever jean negulesco 1946 c the secret of dr kildare harold s bucquet 1939 c django unchained quentin tarantino 2012 a liberal arts josh radnor 2012 d beasts of the southern wild benh zeitlin 2012 c ted seth macfarlane 2012 b almost normal marc moody 2005 f hope springs david frankel 2012 c paranorman chris butler sam fell 2012 b life of pi ang lee 2012 b steel magnolias kenny leon 2012 tv movie c carnival in flanders jacques feyder 1935 b week end jean luc godard 1967 a x2 liz dick lloyd kramer 2012 tv movie f magic mike steven soderbergh 2012 b x2 dust be my destiny lewis seiler 1939 b frequent rants american idol beyoncé boys boys boys britney spears dame judi dench diva cup awards divas film rants god save the british high school musical j hud jake gyllenhaal kathy griffin la tisdale lady gaga le cinema leighton meester music videos oscars pop music reality tv tween subculture vive la france zac efron websites i visit religiously a blog next door all about my movies appleplectic because i saw the film fataculture film experience goatdog s movies greatest films imdb kameron aloud low resolution monsieur cinema my new plaid plants nick s flick picks nobody puts baby in a horner stale popcorn stinkylulu tapeworthy the superficial turner classic movies valley dreamin vera s big gay blog victim of the time what i m listening to right now agnes one last time extended remix charlotte perrelli the girl dream beats featuring the face love stuck florence the machine spectrum say my name calvin harris remix jay z kanye west nig s in paris karmin brokenhearted little boots headphones owl city carly rae jepsen good time rebecca ferguson glitter gold cahill radio edit stooshe black heart tone damli eric saade imagine like what you see add me on last fm blog archive 2018 1 december 1 2017 1 december 1 2016 1 december 1 2015 2 december 1 january 1 2014 6 december 1 july 1 february 2 january 2 2013 7 december 1 september 1 april 1 march 1 a preview of my screenplay february 2 january 1 2012 48 december 1 november 1 october 3 august 4 july 4 june 5 may 1 april 8 march 8 february 7 january 6 2011 158 december 14 november 11 october 13 september 9 august 11 july 13 june 9 may 15 april 30 march 12 february 9 january 12 2010 171 december 11 november 8 october 12 september 16 august 14 july 21 june 18 may 24 april 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