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8 1 why not download a copy and be scared in an ebook format other news the reading for cancer research is definitely going ahead on october 27th from 7pm until 9pm i ll be reading a new longer story left behind written specially for the event left behind will also be available as a chapbook for purchase on the night for 3 with some of the money going to cancer research there will also be some pennine tower 2010 update chapbooks available also 3 a raffle for a copy of quiet houses a chance to buy stock from the shop which has been stockpiling horror and scifi stuff for a while now it d be great to see you there but if you can t attend and you d like a chapbook you can order them direct from me postage will probably be 1 in the uk contact me direct and we ll sort something out i ll also be selling some little quiet houses bookmarks laminated and signed with a sharpie probably for 1 again with money from each one sold going to cancer research want one you know how to sort that yet more news i m definitely doing a session for the chorlton book festival on sunday november 13th at 2pm in chorlton library this will probably be three stories dunno what yet and i ll have quiet houses and maybe some other stuff for sale again it s be great to see you there full details here http manchesterlitlist blogspot com 2011 10 chorlton book festival is back html anything else only that i do still have some signed copies of quiet houses left to sell although not many if you want one and why wouldn t you it s 10 plus p p 2 50 in the uk 6 elsewhere contact me direct and i ll tell you how to get your hands on a copy right i can t be bothered writing any more this morning that s your lot lords and ladies back to your real lives permalink 9 comments eightyfirst time october 3 2011 at 7 23 am uncategorized part 1 before i m writing this sitting on a train to brighton and i don t want to be it s a strange feeling this negativity because i ought to be excited i m going to brighton because that s where the british fantasy convention is being held and fcon is an event at which i always have fun i eat too much drink too much and catch up with people who i don t see often enough who i admire and whose friendship is a pleasure to me more importantly fcon is where my second book quiet houses is being launched and i m very very proud indeed of quiet houses and can t wait for it to be available i ve put a lot of work into it and early reviews have been extremely positive and i m excited about it i m also involved in the launch of the 22 nd volume of stephen jones mammoth book of best new horror and set to do a reading in support of the spectral press both things i like doing immensely practically the train journey is a good time to catch up on some writing i have to proof my story q is for qiqirn for dean drinkel s phobias anthology and i have a new scene to write for the opening chapters of my novel in the hope that an editor i m meeting this weekend will like it and take me on as a client so why don t i want to be here there are a few reasons i suppose the first is money i haven t got much and i don t enjoy being somewhere and worrying about whether i can afford another drink or whether the meal i m eating is going to be more than the cash i have in my pocket perhaps worse fcon might as well be subtitled temptation alley because of the sheer amount of things for sale all of which i want books dvds artwork possibly people s souls all are available in the nooks and crannies of the hotel if only you know where to look and have the means of purchase which i don t the second reason is that i m not feeling particularly well for the first time in ten years except for planned absences for hospital stays i ve been off work for a couple of weeks it s nothing i can put my finger on nothing serious i m simply weary absolutely exhausted for some reason and find myself unable to concentrate or do anything without feeling dreadful afterwards although secretly i m also terribly excited that my doctor s sick note reads lethargy viral in the nature of illness section lethargy marvellous travelling tiresome at the best of times seems all the harder now and getting to the station this morning was hard work despite the unexpected and unseasonal sun and warmth both of those are irritants though not enough to stop me looking forward to the coming weekend so what you might legitimately ask is my problem simple this is one of those rare moments i m able to share some element of writing and what it leads to with other people and the person i want to share it with isn t here let me explain writing contrary to what some authors say is not hard work it s difficult to be sure can be complex and tiring and frustrating and time consuming but it s not physically damaging unless you accidentally stab yourself in the eye with a pencil or dangerous unless you write something unpleasant an author who s bigger than you people s lives do not depend on what we write yet some authors talk about writing as though it s akin to brain surgery or mining or bare knuckle fighting and you know what it s not and they need to get a sense of perspective about what they re doing it is though a mostly solitary occupation not lonely exactly but internal and closed in i spend more time inside my own head than anywhere else in places that no one else can follow me and you know what that s fine honestly what that means though is that on the rare occasions when i can share the experiences it feels important to do it with the person who probably most deserves to be there my wife wendy puts up with my moods with my clattering around the house muttering to myself about story details with my swearing and with pimping my good reviews upon her so it seems only fair that she gets to join in the few good bits that are available to her she puts up with me supports me and keeps me sane she comes to my readings and was at the launch of my first book lost places hell she took the cover photograph that jason van hollander then used to create his startling beautiful cover image those of you who were there will remember the cake she made to celebrate the launch those of you who weren t will have to settle for imagination and jealousy my second book is a big deal for me and i wish i could share its emergence into the world with wendy because she s been in lots of ways as important in its creation as i have however finances and childcare have prevented her coming with me so i m not in the best frame of mind for brighton not really right now it feels like a chore rather than something to be excited about oh i m sure i ll enjoy it when i get there and that it ll all go smoothly but at this point i feel old and tired and i miss my wife and son i know i know i should stop moaning think positively and basically cheer the fuck up but i m can t well okay i won t for now i m going to wallow in the hope that all my sourness is wallowed out by the time i hit brighton call it gathering myself if you want to put a more positive spin on it call it whatever you like but it s something i need to do fcon is fun yes but it s also work a public performance lasting two days or so where i represent my writing and dark continents publishing and i need to be able to give a good account of myself i have to have my game face on every time i leave my room we re approaching london and then it s an hour to brighton enough time to drag myself together i think so i know myself well enough to know that these moods tends to be short lived and that they re curable with good company and beer and pizza all of which i know fcon can provide already i can feel a little bead of excitement twisting and turning and growing inside me do i wish wendy was here that i had more money that i felt better yes will i enjoy this be able to feel pride at what i m achieving with my writing i hope so watch this space part 2 after so it s all over i m on a train back from brighton and the first question is do i feel any better and the answer is yes and no no because i m still feeling lousy although not as lousy as i did the weariness is still with me so much so that i thought i might fall asleep before my reading on friday night and i had to go for a sleep on saturday afternoon and no it wasn t alcohol assisted i have missed my wife and son and still wish they could both have been with me and i m looking forward to seeing them later there s wine chilling and i m looking forward to slumping on the sofa and having a drink and a hug it s yes of course because i have had an absolute whale of a time despite my initial misgivings i think i always knew i would and yes yes yes i know i was being a moaning arse on the way down but there s always that worry isn t there would my mood not lift would i feel too ill to really enjoy it would anyone buy the damned the book or come to the damned reading these little uncertainties come with me everywhere i go as much a part of me as my breathing or my taste in shirts or my grouchiness this might be horrible this might the time that it all goes to shit well it might but it s never like that not at fcon anyway and it starts before i even get there because i met with the impressively tattooed simon marshall jones and his wife the equally impressively tattooed liz on the train out of london simon is the brains behind the relatively new spectral press and is publishing my chapbook rough music next year and a full collection of my stories in 2013 so it was good to catch up with him within minutes of the getting to the hotel i d met up with sarah pinborough mark morris rob shearman gary and emily mcmahon dcp s adrian chamberlain and it has to be said sneaked in to the dealers room and checked out quiet houses but more on that later ray russell and too many other people to mention what it s easy to forget or perhaps more accurately what i sometimes forget when you only see them once a year is that this is a community of people who are in general incredibly supportive smart witty and fundamentally damned nice going to fcon feels in a weird way that i ve not been able to completely pin down like going to a second home finding myself in a space where i feel safe and trusted and welcomed and wanted lovely friday was the harder of the days because my reading shared with gary mcmahon and introduced by simon marshall jones wasn t until half ten in the evening so i had to stay awake and sober for that which i did before then i was interviewed by peter bell for the impossible podcast which was fun note to self don t bother moving your hands about when being interviewed for radio or podcast no one can see you and they just be confused by the sound of your shirtsleeves flapping in a surprisingly full room gary read part of his new novel and it s as bleak and brilliant as his work always is and then assisted by the guest voice of emily mcmahon i read my story borough station we had a good crowd who laughed and groaned in all the right places and it all seemed to go down well i signed a copy of lost places that someone had bought along specially which was really nice and then it was off to the bar and then a relatively early night and sleep the first thing i had to do officially on saturday was the signing for the mammoth book of best new horror 22 but before then i sold the very first copy of quiet houses at just after 10 in the morning quiet houses has turned better than i could have hoped it s a really nice looking book and the cover certainly seems to be catching people s eyes and going down well i managed to spend some time with mistress of ceremonies sarah pinborough the sweariest woman i ve ever met which is saying something but entirely lovely as well as being a great mistress of ceremonies adam neville who was being very nice about my writing without me prompting him and loads of others fcon is a continual blur wandering from room to room and knowing people everywhere here a mark west there a simon bestwick here a roy gray there a steve volk and oh look there s rob shearman and tim lebbon it s impossible to keep track of who you ve spoken to or what you ve said and i know i ll get home later and wish i d had more time with this person or that but it s fun anyway pinballing from friend to friend and knowing that just for one weekend everyone s in the same boat the mammoth signing was as much fun as they always are we re fed wine and sign books what more can we ask for i was wedged between thana niveau and vinnie chong a spit away from joel lane and ramsey campbell in the same line as kim newman mark morris rob shearman and the great stephen jones who also gave me cheques what s not to like and then we come to the launch we always knew we had a hard job as we were up against the launch of jo fletcher s new imprint for quercus but despite that we did pretty well i think people came and they bought the free wine was pretty rough the cake was good and we made a good impression of ourselves i think dave jeffrey who s small and slight in real life and a really nice guy and i both introduced our books briefly and then we sat and tried to look like we knew what we were doing and mostly i m pretty sure we got away with it peter mark may s alt dead launched alongside us and that seemed to sell well so we were all happy by the end i have two books out now it s official and i like it afterwards i had the enormous pleasure of watching the world shatteringly good teattro proberto lord and lady probert s theatrical company perform the entirety of the 1970s horror movie blood on satan s claw as a pantomime and a little later their take on the 1960s movie corruption i laughed so hard that it made my eyes hurt and i may never be the same again john probert is a man whose sartorial elegance runs ahead of my own and was one of the first people i spoke to at my first fcon 3 years ago he and ray russell and reggie oliver were my fcon welcoming committee in 2008 and i genuinely can t imagine a nicer group of men or a better way to start my fcon life than drinking in a bar with them i didn t watch much of the burlesque although i may never forget the look of joy on graham joyce s face as he intoned the words contra directional tassel rotation amazing and then there was the disco now as anyone who knows me will tell you i m not really a dancer i tend to dance like a goth with its arse on fire a situation made worse by the fact that i wear cowboy boots which aren t what you d call boogying shoes however within minutes of getting in there sarah pinborough who s small and blond but impossible to refuse to when she s decided something needs to happen had dragged me onto the dance floor and if i m honest i stayed there most of the evening i can honestly say i ve not danced that much in years mostly because every time i tried to slope off to the side for a quiet drink some bugger would drag me back onto the floor i finally quit at about 2 but i m told it went on until after 3 rio yo...