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Text of the page (random words):
t dead we ve grown they aren t in full bloom we don t have a testimony of the church anymore i decided they left a season out the one that our family has stepped into thanks to your bravery to step a toe out of the box learn what broke your heart and still keep going this is the season of the golden tree your leaves are golden now you have stepped past dogma needing validation from an organization and the approval of others in it you ve grown out of a belief system and into freedom with an open mind and more compassionate heart this is the highest and most beautiful state of living your worthiness is no longer dependent on your conviction and how long your testimony stays in the summer phase the golden tree isn t a phase or a season it is something you awakened a place you can stay for the rest of your life the big leaf on this necklace represents the awakening you led yourself through by letting the uncomfortable into your heart right by where the necklace lays the earrings have four little leaves on them representing the journey you have guided us on respecting each of our paths even the turns that might feel uncomfortable to you you have raised four little leaves and awakened us to our golden tree we never knew was there until you took the biggest leap of faith in your whole life if i had to thank you for doing one thing for me in my 16 years it would be telling me what broke my heart changed my life and ultimately led me to my golden tree i love you mama happy birthday love brinley posted by leah at 3 41 pm labels brinley gifts parenting aftermormonism friday september 27 2019 do you believe in god sometimes i m asked if i still believe in god there are currently about 5 000 versions of god being worshiped so my first question would be what god are you referring to if your god has ever marginalized or oppressed any group of human beings in the past or in the present has created a planet wherein only 02 or 15 or 50 or 75 or 90 of humanity will figure out the right plan and get back to the right heaven requires strict obedience over integrity or conscience or evidence to the contrary creates fear around learning about human history or science or the roots of religion is an anthropomorphic white male who has commissioned religions throughout history and up to this very day to be predominantly patriarchal commands people to fly planes into buildings mutilate female genitalia begin wars protect sexual predators take child brides or any other act that is harmful to our human family supports religious dogma responsible for breaking apart families catastrophic suicide and depression rates and the practice of shaming or blaming those who do not adhere to any one of the over 4 500 versions of religion currently being practiced doesn t somehow know that the circumstances into which a human is born culture race place on the map will determine what flavor of god they worship religion they practice and dogma they believe in then my answer is no i do not believe in that god the more i study human history the more i come to realize that we as evolving human beings have over time created an expansive variety of gods in our image to serve our purposes not the other way around the only kind of god that resonates with me now is one who says my table is big enough to encircle all of humanity from beginning to end fully without question look into the eyes of your human family at my fully inclusive table those who ve been raised in cultures and religions and with ideas that are completely foreign to yours when you learn to love and accept them fully without judgement acknowledging that they are perfectly worthy when you begin to see what makes you the same not different only then will you even begin to grasp what i am and what truly matters for your growth i sense that within the question do you believe in god lives an underlying and unspoken feeling do you belong within my tribe are you one of us are you following what i ve been conditioned to see as the correct way is there hope left for you and my response is this do we really need qualifying questions to determine if we are willing to make enough room for everyone at our table posted by leah at 11 02 am labels awakened monday august 26 2019 my answer is yes this weekend we spent time with a beautiful family who is in the process of awakening the mother left four months ago and her husbands shelf came painfully crashing down two weeks ago he is admittedly in the will i ever feel happy and normal again phase one of his questions to us was do you really feel happy and how i am going to share with you my answer to this question because hopefully it can help someone here my answer whole heartedly undeniably enthusiastical ly yes yes yes and here are just a few reasons why i have felt an unquenchable thirst for learning and that thirst has sent me on a journey that has awakened my soul in a way i truly never thought was possible my mind feels like it has literally exploded in a good way into new realms and new awakenings that bring more beauty presence and joy into my life 1 navigating our transition skillfully meant learning new relationship skills that have proven to positively impact every relationship learning how to implement boundaries determine levels of vulnerability and operate from an inner space that feels rooted and thoughtful it has been so empowering 2 my body soul actually feels lighter it s true it has been so healing and joyful to shed layers of shame never enoughness sticking to a script program and a culture that was at times in opposition to my personal core values the relationships we have with our children have evolved into a more authentic space leaving us feeling more in tune more real and more connected to them my biggest fear in leaving the church was our children yet now we feel that we have given them a wonderful gift 3 our marriage has expanded in ways that would have never been possible in the church i want to be sensitive here because i know that the opposite can be true and that literally makes my heart hurt for us fortunately we feel more real more seen more loved and just happier now together than we did in the past 4 more time hello we had no idea how much time and effort actually went into church contributions especially for cody not only do we have sundays but now saturdays are not jam packed with getting ready for sunday so they are more relaxed too we also have less stress throughout the week no more early am seminary midweek and weekend youth activities etc oh the gift of time it has been so precious 5 i feel less fear for my children and less fear in general in my life i notice that i tend to see more goodness in the world and feel less us vs them as i see humanity without a lens of judgment which by the way i didn t think i had until my shelf crashed i am able to see that we are surrounded by goodness it is truly everywhere 6 the people the post mormon community is simply incredible and we have made friends that feel like instant family we have felt embraced by love and acceptance we lost a tribe yes and we gained a tribe who unconditionally accepts us it s just awesome 7 i feel a sense of power in my life as i have been willing to live my truth publicly and openly and accept that many will judge and many will fall away facing this reality and walking through it has been such a growth opportunity both painful and absolutely beautiful i feel freed to live more truthfully in all areas of my life 8 we ve replaced old traditions with new traditions and rituals that make my heart sing instead of going through the motions of fhe scripture study etc because they said so we now get to choose how to grow how to learn how to operate in ways that our inner compass is leading us into it is so so wonderful and comes without outside pressures or righteous obligatory feelings and there is more so much more i literally cried for 6 months straight folks those were the hardest and saddest and scariest months of my life and you may be there now please please know this there is so much hope for you you truly are moving through a phase of grieving a death of epic proportions to allow for new life and new growth and new light and happiness into your life take your time love yourself through it and just know that the light will come posted by leah at 12 05 pm sunday august 4 2019 the gift of differentiation one of the most beautiful attributes we have learned through our awakening is how healthy differentiation works in relationships and in family systems this is a foundational principal that can be found in all healthy relationships however is often lacking in strict high demand religious environments and families where conformity is critical often as i am coaching with parents leaving mormonism we talk about how they can honor their children by demonstrating and teaching differentiation because we were programmed to think and believe the exact same thing without question most find themselves needing to play catch up in how to feel safe when those closest to us may feel differently about certain topics this is a very brief post on the topic i contributed to parenting aftermormonism remember that as you move forward on this journey everyone is entitled to their own feelings and experience of it each person in your family will process and grieve and experience this transition differently honor your children during times when they may feel differently than you teach them what compassionate understanding looks like as you offer true love and understanding to them during their times of struggle understanding without time limits expectations or value judgements teach them how you value differentiation meaning that everyone in the family is allowed to feel differently about things and they will still fully belong and be loved fully in the family you are giving your children a beautiful gift by helping them realize that your family does not have to all fit into the same belief box for the rest of their lives they will interact with friends teachers spouses neighbors colleagues etc who think believe and act differently to teach children to hold space for and not feel threatened by people who do things and think things entirely different than they do is to offer them one of the most valuable relationship skills posted by leah at 12 59 pm labels parenting aftermormonism a graduate course this is a contribution to parenting aftermormonism on instagram i recently took this account over and that means i contribute more and am looking for others to participate by offering content as well i ve come to feel a deep reverence as i look back and consider our faith awakening crisis because i see it as one of the grandest teaching tools for our children of all time as crazy as it may sound i do feel thankful for the massively painful layers of transition my children have had to face they ve faced loosing friends being judged by family and feeling cast off by their once safe religious tribe all of these experiences in one way or another will happen to everyone in different ways and at different times everyone s child will have to move through painful and unfair experiences in their lives learning the truth about the church and leaving it has offered a graduate course experience for our impressionable children they have grown in such breathtaking ways that they never could have otherwise in the beginning i was so angry about how immoral it was that had to grieve feeling betrayed by an organization that taught and claimed honesty they cried so many tears of sadness it still pricks my heart just thinking about it however now i can feel thankful for the refining fire that propelled our girls into a higher dimension of awareness and compassion offering them navigation tools that will help them more confidently and successfully navigate the bumpy terrain of their lives posted by leah at 12 14 pm labels parenting aftermormonism saturday july 27 2019 happy birthday avery happy birthday to our bright eyed avery grace this year it took courage to stand amongst such a large crowd of more seasoned actors when you tried out for the professional production of peter pan you prepared fervently and you showed up fully hoping to get one of the few kid parts you believed you could but you didn t get a part in life this will sometimes happen you will try your best but you won t get the part or the grade or the job or whatever it is that you ar e hoping for what happened next was where i saw your wise strength emerge you were determined to attend the play and show support we walked into that theater and you held your head high you smiled you clapped you chose joy for those who did make it and you were truly happy that night what that told me about you then and through so many other similar experiences is that you are confident enough to learn something meaningful in any experience that to me is the essence of the words on this t shirt i feel so thankful to have confidence that you will embody what it means to truly believe in yourself that you will face both triumphs and tribulations in a skillful healthy and confident way i am so proud of you my happy 13 year old birthday girl posted by leah at 10 12 am older posts home subscribe to posts atom about me leah i love my life i am richly blessed each day and share some of that with you all here view my complete profile brinley 13 avery 10 aspen 8 reese 5 blog archive 2020 3 february 2 curiosity and connection vs control her inner beauty shines through january 1 2019 13 december 1 october 1 september 1 august 3 july 4 march 1 february 2 2018 4 november 1 october 1 september 2 2017 54 october 2 september 13 august 5 june 4 may 5 march 2 february 9 january 14 2016 100 december 11 november 11 october 13 september 18 august 3 july 9 june 14 may 6 april 4 march 6 february 2 january 3 2015 53 december 4 november 6 october 7 september 11 august 5 july 6 may 3 april 4 march 3 february 2 january 2 2014 53 december 4 november 4 october 3 september 2 august 6 july 8 june 2 may 6 april 7 march 3 february 5 january 3 2013 69 december 5 november 5 october 3 september 9 august 7 july 4 june 6 may 8 april 5 march 7 february 3 january 7 2012 96 december 15 november 10 october 9 september 4 august 4 july 6 june 9 may 9 april 8 march 9 february 5 january 8 2011 80 december 6 november 5 october 5 september 6 august 5 july 9 june 6 may 5 april 8 march 8 february 8 january 9 2010 100 december 11 november 7 october 8 september 6 august 9 july 8 june 9 may 11 april 7 march 7 february 8 january 9 2009 93 december 9 november 7 october 8 september 10 august 10 july 5 june 7 may 7 april 7 march 6 february 9 january 8 2008 111 december 5 november 9 october 6 september 9 august 8 july 12 june 12 may 10 april 10 march 10 february 14 january 6 2007 121 december 13 november 19 october 23 september 18 august 11 july 11 june 9 may 6 april 5 march 6 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