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description=My Submissive Journey in a Life of D/s Slavery;

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Text of the page (random words):
lave world in which i am the sexual object but i feel these days that i write about this non event too much even my daily slave trainings once new and surprising as events now have become part of our routine i am trained every day but usually in the same postures and services and sexual uses again my trainings are almost always deeply submissive feeling to me but they are often the same ol same old to report to others standing at the edge of unimportance has deep submissive effects within me but i can write that only so many times i know i have written this post before at points where i have nothing new to post because my slave life is about regular experiences and usual routines i am not complaining just describing the challenge of writing about my real life slavery which has its own version of the daily grind to be clear i cherish the daily ordinariness of my slavery i like the routine enjoy sinking into my lower place of status exult in being objectified submissively i actually desire to feel like the property i am and the daily grind provides that but often that is not eventful and nothing to write home about shaemadigan bdsm breasts d s dominance erotica real life real life bdsm real life erotica relationships slavery submission uncategorized writing 12 comments august 7 2026 august 7 2026 3 minutes ratatouille interrupted she and master mckenna work late into the evening monday handling a particular mess in one of the east coast offices master is angry about it weary from the conflicts involved and has developed a headache he goes up to bed early this is about 8 00 mistress maria too is tired but she sees the chance to have me to herself so she stays up longer edge of unimportance she orders me and i assume the position my body fully nude and high heeled as mistress goes upstairs to freshen up after the long day she returns around 8 30 in a short silky robe bringing a serving plate with a towel draped over it probably snacks for later mistress silent signals me to serve her a drink chardonnay she says silent signals are rather superfluous when it s just me one on one with one of them the point of silent signals is to avoid verbal interruptions when master and mistress perhaps with visitors are in conversation together they allow the chat to continue without acknowledging my presence yet directing my services this diminishes me in the process showing others that i am not worthy of spoken words but with just mistress and me in the room the silent signals are a little silly and she realizes that she adds aloud get yourself something and sit across from me i obey curtsying properly before walking naked to the wet bar and pouring drinks given the unusual circumstances of the evening this does not feel like the same formal slave training time they put me in each evening i think mistress is unsure of how she wants me if she wishes to talk with me or have me attend to her in some way having served her wine i sit in the easy chair adjacent to hers angling my legs together to one side a futile effort for propriety while completely nude previously mistress had turned the great room lights low now the two of us are bathed in the glow of the umbrella lamp on the occasional table between us she leans her head back and sighs this is different i have rarely seen her so drained of energy maria is always thinking planning one or two steps ahead not frantic with energy but always pushing forward now she seems inert unable to do or say anything i wait for her to talk to me but she doesn t and i break the silence how may i serve you mistress i am still coming to terms with my submission to mistress maria not that i am concerned any more with the loss of our girlfriend ship we still have that and my slavery under her now is just a new dimension of our larger love in some ways better i am her girlfriend and her confidante and her sister in lifestyle and her slut slave all of the above sort of happen together in time and sequence and it seems to be working but i have my moments of resistance they re really just what every submissive wriggles against with a new dominant yes we slaves submissively need to be dominated but it s simply human nature to resist the restriction of freedom i thrill in being collared and leashed and yet like a wild mare i sometimes buck under the reins of a new rider so i have had my moments of rebellion against her usually brief defiances or withholdings we both know what this is and mistress maria is rather brilliant in finding relational ways of taming me i have my hissy fit and she finds a way of pushing my nose into my own humiliation like i m a puppy who made a mess i then crawl back into my submission to her as this particular evening is discombobulated from our normal routine i feel some of this resistance within me master m is not here and somehow it all seems out of whack i feel for mistress maria to be alone in conducting my usual slave training my formal slave training is the province of master not mistress not entirely true but part of my feelings in the moment so i am unsettled about this however i realize that maria is not her usual self is exhausted and yet is trying to unwind by taking my reins thanks to my better angels i decide this is not the time for rebellion and so i say how may i serve you mistress mistress says i want you to spread your legs and prop them on the arms of your chair i look at her for a brief moment not to delay but to read her mood she is desiring it seems to find relaxation through some visual lusting for me i re seat myself in the leather chair hooking one of my bare thighs across its arm then the other letting my legs dangling over the sides she now looks at me down between my spread legs seeing my shaven pussy slightly splayed open into folds and ridges she sips her wine i say nothing submitting to her consumption of my open pussy we sit like this for a long time maybe twenty or so minutes at times mistress closes her eyes and leans her head back occasionally she looks again perhaps capturing an image she takes with her into her dreams through it all i remain silent the most basic duty of a submissive slave being used like a love doll presently she speaks take the towel from the tray and slide it under you i do until it sits flat like a thick napkin between my pussy and the leather of the chair seat i have no idea what she is doing and i think once again that she is improvising tonight sometimes our dominants do not have a plan sometimes in their idle riffing we are rendered all the more incidental and superfluous in any such immediate moment we may be replaced by a book or needlepoint or a tv show as the focus it isn t for a while until i notice what was under the towel she is looking at it and her gaze draws mine to see as well there sits a long yellow crook neck summer squash and a small finger bowl of olive oil and now i realize that mistress is not ad libbing at all she has planned this for some time she gives me instructions oil up the slender end and slide it inside you if i ve learned anything from my life in sexual service it s never to assume you know another s sexuality we all have secret lusts and fantasies sometimes very specific kinks that defy knowing still it doesn t feel to me like maria would be likely to have some private fantasy involving me and a summer squash her sexuality especially her dominant sexuality as it s been emerging this year is relational and psychological whereas master m is often about hardware chains and ropes and whips and springs attached to my nipples mistress maria is about playing with the chains of my own self image and the humiliations that she can dig out from within me i would not consider her to have a secret kink of erotic pleasure in vegetables but you never know what s that old line who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men what does that come from here who knows what kink lies in the hearts of men and women and maria if i ve learned anything else from my life in sexual service it s not to judge what others find erotic and so when she orders oil up the slender end and slide it inside you i obey thinking maybe i am filling not only my pussy but also a remote corner of her libido oiled the squash slips into me easily its end plopping in not unlike the head of a man s cock she tells me to leave it there to remove my hands and for a while it just lies there half inside me the bulbous half resting outside on the towel do you masturbate when you re alone she asks you know i don t i want to hear you say it i don t masturbate i say you don t feel the desire to masturbate when you re alone i just told you i don t masturbate i m asking if you feel the desire to do so sometimes not often why is that mistress knows the answers to these questions so this is sort of call and response like a catechism i just don t feel that strong a desire usually and why is that she repeats i don t know i reply even though i do know she cuts through it isn t it because your pussy is used all the time every day multiple times a day that s an overstatement but a slight one and now is not the time to parse the numbers her point is true in essence and humiliating because it s true this is what she intends i blush now feeling my naked body before her and all the more aware i am currently having intercourse with a squash something like that i say so your pussy is used so much giving pleasure to others that it needs down time something like that i say so you only masturbate when you re ordered to yes as you well know but i m rarely ordered to i realize now that all this is very much in keeping with maria s sexuality and dominance the summer squash which now spreads my labia and fills me is not some object of her erotic fantasy it s used as an object lesson for her to interrogate me intimately a vehicle for my humiliation i ve talked with mark about this mistress says we both want to watch you masturbate more often thank you mistress but only in front of visitors you will masturbate to orgasm in front of our visitor friends oh god she says that this is training that i need to learn how to masturbate according to the directives of my dominants that i must start and stop on command this of course isn t my first affair with vegetables mistress amanda is fond of cucumbers and the like when she has me at the wet bar but usually i am bent over forward and never see what she is inserting in me it may as well be a toy a dildo this is different because i can see it a strangely shaped vegetable halfway lodged in my vagina upon her order i twist the squash like a large screw entering its anchor sliding it slowly in and out of me having applied olive oil i feel it squishy inside me it s a strange feeling erotic in the oddness of it in one flight of mental fancy i think of myself as a kind of sous chef this being a special preparation for a gourmet meal or even less than that maybe i am a just a kitchen appliance despite the fact that my lover is an inanimate object it is arousing me the alien having bumps and ridges along its skin that drag across my pussy lips and ripple the inside of my vagina my breathing starts to quicken mistress maria sees my response and orders me to stop i look up at her forlornly but i obey hands off she says and my hands rise up and to my sides the object left on its own still penetrating me silence a minute later she says continue it goes like this for the longest time mistress stopping my masturbation then starting it again her playing with my pussy without hands like a remote control dildo you need to be controlled as you masturbate for visitors she says i want to say no you just get off controlling me but i remain silent my eyes watering from my arousal i realize my predicament now and how it will be in the future mistress can read my body so well knowing my tells the physical symptoms of my approaching orgasm she knows me to that level of psycho physical detail in a way master mckenna does not she has me pumping the squash in and out again now faster and i am losing it she stops me mid swoon i obey hand s off again but now i am throbbing and a tear escapes my eye please i beg her no she says calmly but firmly she waits for another minute until my desperation abates a little then she starts me up again i m at a point when i wish as much that she would stop me entirely as to allow me to climax either one but this stopping and starting is an agony i beg her again and again please let me she likes hearing me beg seeing me in this kind of sexual distress one more time and now i feel myself falling over the edge but she orders me to stop and i do being so hopelessly submissive that i deny myself the only thing i can think about my orgasm is interrupted pull the squash out of your cunt she says please no you re done it s time for bed i m tired and going upstairs but yes now we ll see how easy it is for you to say you don t masturbate you re cruel you re just now realizing that mistress maria says with a wicked smile she stands and beckons me to her she reaches out and grasps my breasts pulling me into her she kisses me long and sweet you know i love you she says you have a funny way of showing it who are you talking to she corrects me you have a funny way of showing it mistress she whispers in my ear in the morning i ll ask you if you touched yourself she wipes a tear from the corner of my eye remember i always know when you re lying shaemadigan bdsm breasts d s dominance erotica lesbian real life bdsm real life erotica relationships sex slavery submission uncategorized 15 comments august 6 2026 9 minutes random thoughts on cocksucking odd perhaps to think thoughts about cocksucking when cocksucking is such a physical fleshly act of the body but here i am doing so it has become the circumstance of my life that i am now teased publicly about my penchant for sucking men s cocks sometimes from people i would never expect it s my own doing i suppose as i have written extensively about it here sometimes i forget that what i intend as a kind of self confession in a private journal is actually public expression and sometimes people in my vanilla life discover my blog and my particular longing for a man s cock and so it was yesterday that my friend jenna at the collective said something about this we were having a quick lunch in my workspace sharing what we d done on the weekends and she casually asked with a wry smile how things went on my date with blake on friday evening this took me by surprise because a jenna is gay and really could care less about a man s cock and b i did not recall i ever had said anything to her about blake i quickly deduced that jenna has found my blog it would be later that i would mentally race through all my blog posts and realize all that jenna had learned about me cringe and blush i will need to have a further conversation with her but in that moment with her i simply found a way of easing around her question ...