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out of the room did i mention emptying everything out of the room it s sitting in a pod in my driveway engrossed with the attractive trade name pack rat earlier editions of this container spotted around the hood over the past several years actually displayed the snarling effigy of a rat at least the asbestos meant the whole team religiously donned n95 masks before starting work we had the vents already blocked up the engineer who is mister osha consulted his own workplace protocol for operating in asbestos contaminated environments and set up a corsi rosenthal box in the space which no one s asked about but which no one s disturbed either in order to do the work explainer warned me they would have to pull all the knotty pine paneling off the exterior walls okay i winced as the rending noises reached me from below then they would jackhammer out a foot deep foot wide trench around the perimeter of the concrete slab fill it with coarse gravel about the size of driveway bluestone to make a drain seal the top of the drain with new concrete and install a sump pump it would be on us to engage someone to install new paneling what we had was visibly mildewing from the damp and wire up a dedicated circuit for the pump funny things get to you i have a horror of sump pumps every one i ve ever seen occupied an open gross looking cavity in the floor impossible to keep clean in any meaningful way and dangerous looking if you have animals it is a pleasant surprise to find that this one is completely contained under a sealed hatch as if the demon azteron or someone is imprisoned down there it discharges into my azalea bed no fear though i went downstairs at the end of the second day to discover that explainer had not made one thing clear every inch of my cinderblock walls which i lovingly painted in 2010 was now caparisoned in a heavy white plastic vapor barrier i thought this was going to just be behind the new paneling to protect it from any further water incursion the system works by channeling any water that penetrates the cinderblock right into the drain but no my laundry room was wearing depends that was when i broke down and cried the engineer does not understand this his blissful indifference to his surroundings is a thing of wonder to me it was also when we discovered that the contractor engaged to restore the walls and floor omar no relation to the poet ran a full service operation electrician plumber drywaller painter whatever all of whom we were going to need i resigned myself to hearing the register go ching on the last day of the waterproofing it rained stair rods i am happy to report that none of it showed up inside meanwhile the work crew mostly banty little central american guys who would go about one forty in a wet trench coat paraded up my increasingly churned mud lawn wearing tabards made out of hefty bags and carrying full buckets of rubble on their shoulders i chuck dumbbells around and all but i am in awe of these people anyone who wants to rag about immigrants destroying this country or such shit can bite my ass three weeks ensued devoted to picking out flooring and paint for the new drywall destined to conceal the depends and to letting the concrete cure the month anniversary of the pack rat pod passed in the meantime incurring another month s charge from the pod company ching next the invasion posted in life is dumb uncategorized 2 comments february 27 2024 by sledpress old guy this was mystery when the engineer brought him home almost nineteen years ago he was the runt of his litter eternally struggling with seven other siblings to get at the teats of a mother who really wasn t interested in the job the engineer had negotiations with the feckless college kid friends who hadn t gotten their cat fixed but that was another story at the time the engineer didn t live with me but i got to watch mystery grow up all the same he liked my hair he arrived here in 2015 along with two of his sisters he s the only one left now big derpy shamelessly greedy for food to the point that he d butt other cats heads out of the way to get at a dish passionate about the juice off water packed tuna a mighty hunter of crocheted cat toys around which he would utter that deep throated cry of triumph with which cats celebrate the capture of wily prey both sisters learned that a perfunctory lick on mystery s forehead would be rewarded with a full scale grooming session he became mr ferguson s dopey bowling buddy the only other cat nickel the bengal would tolerate eighteen pounds of blond doofus rapidly learning that a leap to the back of the couch facing the entry door would garner petting and attention from my clients to the point he became something of an attractive nuisance feature me waiting patiently through ten or fifteen minutes of firehosed baby talk while a triathlete amazon kisses and skritches history s greatest attention slut he weighs about eight pounds now if he s slightly damp old kitties get dicky kidneys and for a couple of years now he s been getting infused fluids a by now choregraphed ritual involving a towel wrap and me seated on the commode lid holding him while the engineer pops a 18 needle under the skin of his scruff first three times a week then every day and now twice daily he sits patiently rarely uttering a sound afterwards there are treats over the winter he stopped eating the treats gradually he stopped eating much of anything he walks haltingly the arthritis supplement no longer helping because he won t eat the food it s mixed in he s taken possession of a cat bed next to the heat register a location that s been a fan favorite in this house since before he arrived last fall when we rebuilt the screened porch off the kitchen into a full glass enclosure he gravitated into the sunbeams that strike the pedestal of a cat platform out there for most of the day when we pick him up to give him his fluid treatment his fur is toasty even when the porch is cool sometimes i stand there looking down at him until i can tell he s still breathing he still loves the engineer s head which he uses for a pillow at night and the sealed oil radiator in the bathroom which he communes with every morning i haven t heard his deep almost subsonic purr for a while now though and being petted doesn t seem to make an impression the last time i saw him get up on the sofa back was a few weeks ago he doesn t groom to speak of when i see him stumble or take a few steps and then sit down when i see him leave his heatybed look around with a confused demeanor and then hobble back i wonder if there s anything left for him and if it s time to make that call that you eventually have to make but then i see him like this this morning when he jumped stiffly down from the bed and went to the top of the stairs announcing in no uncertain terms that it was time for him to be carried down he went straight to the porch i see him like this and i still see joy it s not time yet posted in cats uncategorized tagged cats 15 comments february 9 2024 by sledpress dirt so i have the dirt i mean literally what happened was for the first time in two years we had enough rain at one time to be measured thanks global warming two back to back snowstorms had already saturated ground that had been pretty much fired in a kiln for most of 2022 and 2023 and disagreeably enough there i was with an obscene looking object called a hot hog sopping up the water that began to seep into the basement a hot hog or hazmat pig is a sort of absorbent draft blocker used by emergency workers to contain spills each one is a yard long sausage of cloth in a suggestive pink color stuffed with a material that can suck up an impressive liquid volume i used to date an emergency services groupie one useful thing that came of that i don t usually get water coming in twice in almost thirty years once after a week s deluge once after an enterprising chipmunk dug his burrow straight down beside the house so after i tucked the hot hog flush against the baseboard and spread out old beach towels we went looking for the problem downspout okay gutter clear the engineer finally homed in on the site of the trench dug in late 2021 after he replaced a jetta that had seen better days about 20 years of them with a little electric cooper that s barely been driven now that he works from home in his jammies at the time we didn t expect that to be a permanent thing and we jumped on a tax credit for installing a home charger which meant drilling through the house wall and running conduit through a trench to the driveway it looks as if the excavated area has slowly developed into a swale that collects water and runs it toward the foundation at least that s the theory so we needed dirt to rebuild the grade i discovered there was a business that will sell you any amount of fill dirt and a couple dozen other earth products no order too large or too small some back of the envelope calculations a few e mails and several ridiculously cheerful field videos later guys just love operating dump trucks and backhoes apparently i made a new best friend chuck actually answers the phone when you call without your having to sit through please do not bypass because our prompts have recently changed chuck responds to e mails with a thumbs up emoji the size of a salad plate chuck wanted to know what the engineer and i did for a living that we could both do from home and looked up my address on google earth and wanted to know if that was a cape cod and wow new roof and new siding sweet little house chuck promised to use his smallest truck and deliver himself and be careful not to take down my phone line chuck showed up at eight fifteen this morning a good old boy in the classic mode sunburned balding big bellied and grinning and delicately daintily tilted the bed of the cutest little dump truck you ever saw neatly avoiding the power lines and heaping fill dirt as clean as beach sand on the end of my drive you said you were a massage therapist he said my son s a massage therapist he taught me about the woo woo i m all into the woo woo now the universe good energy i try to have good energy then he gave me a thumbs up leapt back into his little truck and rumbled off i think he does have good energy my back which was giving me gyp when i got out of bed feels better now a good thing because now we have to shovel all that dirt it was almost worth a leaky basement posted in the yard uncategorized tagged good energy home maintenance 4 comments post navigation older posts search recent posts double dog dare you a tale told by an idiot civic mindedness talented directors water 4 well that sucked i grump i live for books and barbells if you were born after us president nixon resigned i am old enough to be your mamma but i will still arm wrestle you i am a woman of a certain age with an interesting past and you have been warned if you remain intrepid you can reach me at get pressed enter your email 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