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description=icon by pumi-envy I use exclusively she/her/hers pronouns in english. do not call me they. ;
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Text of the page (random words):
lot of bad faith criticisms that effectively present trans women as predating on cis men which is just transmisogyny but it s not without criticism just because bad criticism exists out there the seriousness people take this conversation where they use a lot of charged language that overdramatizes the issue as if you personally imposing your view of them verbally is the only thing that stands in the way of certain suicide is just silly people come out at their own paces and being told you re something before you re ready to admit it or even consider it a possibility isn t very helpful to deeply closeted people you re already being called a faggot and a tranny for behavior you feel and actually is normal recognition doesn t always produce a butterfly support does being a friend who is willing to listen if they do have questions about transitioning and self discovery is gonna do far more than outright telling a cis person that they are deeply closeted trans and need to take hrt immediately merely having trans friends who accepted my self perception as cis when we met was a major window into normalizing the idea that this could be me too having people impose their ideas even if positive before i came out was not a decisive factor it made me feel alienated because i wasn t certain as to what my feelings were at the time even coming into an explicitly woman identity took some time after coming out as trans and it took me awhile to take the plunge and first get on hormones there was a lot of anxiety even with friends and support around that pressuring me would not have served you don t need to be pushy just be there this applies to sexuality too you shouldn t be pressuring someone to come out that isn t fully there or comfortable with the idea yet you hang around for when they come around yeah its gonna be obvious and not just in hindsight who around you is closeted and will eventually come out but that s for them to come to terms with and you to be a supportive and welcoming friend wherever they are on that journey someone might toy with the idea of exploring their gender and sexuality years before they actually do it and that s normal you come out when you come out that s less important than ensuring you have a community that loves and supports your decisions when you do thissss 103 notes jul 28th 2026 open in app facebook tweet reddit mail embed permalink jewishbarbies jewishbarbies so christopher nolan drilled into an active historical site to rig a scene dumped a bunch of plastic skeletons into the ocean with no plan to fish them out and ruined an actual viking ship on loan from sweden and refuses to pay for damages all for that garbage movie jewishbarbies owner of viking ship used in the odyssey says studio has not paid bill for damage swedish nonprofit alleges cost to repair replica was 6 000 but universal which made 264m on film s opening weekend has not stumped up the guardian concerns about prop disposal as filming on new nolan film comes to a close www italianinsider it concerns about prop disposal as filming on new nolan film comes to a close www italianinsider it italianinsider it looking for a news outlet to pick up the archeologist drama over this but you can google the practical effects used for the cyclops and find the pictures pretty easily jewishbarbies nolan s the odyssey has a colonialism problem despite morocco s hopes that its film industry would reap rewards the blockbuster s success will be tainted by controversy surrounding film carnegie endowment for international peace and it gets even worse 24 584 notes jul 28th 2026 open in app facebook tweet reddit mail embed permalink stars and soda witchsteria i do think what gets ignored about carrie as a character is that she s an incredibly easy target to bully she s a chubby sheltered acne ridden teenage girl who wears frumpy grandma clothes and regurgitates the jesus freak shit her violently abusive mother tells her she has violent thoughts about her classmates and is uncomfortable to be around she s far more interesting being a victim that s somewhat uncomfortable to be in the head of than a tragic waif she s not a martyr she s a child and a child who s been victimised her whole life shouldn t have to be kind and angelic to be recognised as a victim suffering teenage girls shouldn t just be presented on screen as toned down glamorous thin ophelias suffering teenage girls can be fat and poor and think violently i do think we need to examine why culturally we need teenage girls to be beautiful and kind to valorise their suffering and treat it as bad 12 530 notes jul 28th 2026 open in app facebook tweet reddit mail embed permalink the finnsterism of it all you know who im talkin bout 2 notes jul 28th 2026 open in app facebook tweet reddit mail embed permalink autogynophelia autogynophelia i used to be a passionate advocate for transmasc lesbians my logic was this lesbianism is a social culture that is defined not by rigid boundaries but by a shared language in jokes memes signifiers etc etc i argued that even a cis man could be a lesbian in theory but that if he is there is definitely something queer going on with his gender so cis man is probably not the most apt descriptor i pointed to other examples of queer words whose meaning has changed over time e g bisexual to indicate that there is no need to insist on wlw as a definition or its non men equivalent even as the reality of the use of the word lesbian is shifting right before our eyes i took a descriptivist approach to lesbian whoever calls themselves a lesbian but in all my activity along this line i never even noticed that not a single transmasc lesbian nor cis lesbian had ever reached out to me to say you are welcome in our community i was putting in all this work to advocate for a group of people who didn t even want me around and there is no way in hell they d put in the same effort for me i was doing the intellectual work of justifying the inclusion of a group that benefitted from my exclusion i think that when i realised that this was happening was when materialism really clicked for me who actually is excluded from lesbian spaces who actually needs help being included who doesn t need that help because they are already included for all i heard online about the demonisation of transmasculinity you can t move for transmascs of all stripes in my local lesbian scene while there are maybe one or two transfems willing to put up with the indignity of how they are treated there my views on transmasc lesbians haven t really changed i still agree with all that in principle the thing that has changed is i no longer spend time and energy advocating for a group of people who will accept my advocacy only to slam the door in my face 919 notes jul 28th 2026 open in app facebook tweet reddit mail embed permalink postal420 autogynophelia i end up complaining about transmascs a lot on here the reason is that i am not really friends with many cis people irl because of their transphobia except one or two friends i ve had since childhood and my transfem friends don t antagonise me very much so basically transmascs make up a sizeable proportion of my social network because they are generally tolerable but they are also where most of the problems come from because of the dynamics of oppression it probably looks like i m fixated on this one demographic but really it s the fact that the demographic is generally good that means i am friends with them at all anyway with that out of the way i want to talk about my trans guy friend tom not his real name over the last year or so there s been a pattern of i say or do something innocent he aggressively accuses me of bad behaviour i explain that he misinterpreted what happened but apologise for it all the same and promise to do better he grudgingly says ok we never mention it again it s got so bad that i panic whenever i get a message from him and if it is one of his aggressive ones i go into a days long anxiety spiral on saturday i arranged a trip to trans pride in london for a group of trans people near me i didn t want to arrange it because i m burnt out but there were a few people i knew who wanted to go but didn t want to go alone so i felt i had a duty to arrange something for their sake one of them was a wheelchair user so i made this detailed plan for how we would navigate our journey to and from the march avoiding steps and calling ahead to train stations to warn them if they needed to get a manual ramp ready for us i posted this and tom read it and thumbs upped it in the end the wheelchair user couldn t come so we used a different route instead on the way back from the march i made a comment about how difficult the route we were taking would be if we had a wheelchair with us because the station we were in had a load of steps i also explained how there was a different route i had planned for wheelchair users i was wrecked after that day and honestly just wanted a week of being left alone to recover the next day tom messaged me to say he was really upset about the ableist comment i had made and he called me a hypocrite because i have previously criticised others for ableism it turned out he interpreted this would be really impossible with a wheelchair as wheelchair users are such a burden he is not a wheelchair user himself fyi although i have been in the recent past and he knows this i apologised that he had been upset by what i said but explained that my words didn t mean that they were a reference to the plan i had made about wheelchair accessible journeys he claimed he hadn t heard me explain this at the time and he didn t remember reading my post about accessibility that he had thumbs upped i was obviously in a spiral at this point because not only was i the only person in our network who had shown any interest at all in helping a wheelchair user which tom could ve done himself but didn t but also i was the only one being called out and called a hypocrite when i hadn t even done anything wrong my wife saw my reaction to this and she got annoyed on my behalf she has seen how much i panic around messages from tom and since she was actually at trans pride and present at the time i made the ableist comment she knew it was bullshit she sent a message to tom saying that the way he talks to me is not fair and is totally disproportionate to the alleged offence and that she has noticed that he never talks to her like that she was implying but not stating that there was a transmisogynistic motive behind tom s different behaviour towards us since she is cis tom then went berserk he started accusing my wife and i of talking about him behind his back and basically accused her of letting me take her phone and harass him on two fronts i weighed in to say i didn t ask her to get involved she is just concerned about how he treats me there has since been 24 hours of me trying to explain how the way he talks to me is part of a wider context of trans women s actions being uncharitably misinterpreted and blown out of all proportion i said that he could ve said hey what did you mean by this thing you said yesterday before going directly to accusations of ableism and hypocrisy which it turned out were unfounded i said he could talk to me like a friend who cares about and knows me and not like someone writing a complaint to a dodgy business or their mp he then started going into how he has learned a lot about communication styles and he is just doing best practice by naming the harm that was caused that he is willing to be more gentle in future but that s a concession he is making because of my fragility and defensiveness to criticism and he is unhappy that i am not making any concessions in return never mind that i immediately apologised and promised to do better even though i didn t even do anything wrong in the first place his position now is that my wife and i have ganged up on him and derailed what was originally a critique of my ableism into a barrage of unfair criticism of him and we are fragile and defensive and he is sad that people who seemed good on the surface can be so different underneath he keeps using therapy speak and social justice speak to undermine any attempts by me to point out issues if he is rude it is best practice and i am implied to be uneducated for not knowing that if i mention something he did wrong it s derailing if he accuses me of something i didn t do it s him naming the harm that was caused all this comes in the context that he has never engaged seriously with transmisogyny as a form of oppression on the many times i ve brought it up at one point i was trying to explain why i felt the way he talked to me was unreasonable so i reached for a recent situation where i felt he had done something wrong to show how i behave if the roles are reversed i referred to a time 2 weeks ago when he said the world would be a better place if everyone with a y chromosome died at the time i thought wow that s gross but i said nothing because i used the wider context of knowing him to infer that he probably didn t mean it and honestly i find it hard to call out men s behaviour because they rarely react well to it this was probably not the best example because it s really an example of me being afraid to call him out but it s what i reached for in the moment i brought this up and he said it was just a joke a day later i responded to explain how it s a transmisogynistic joke that at best only transfems can make and it s not appropriate for him to be saying it he then said yeah i realised it was bad immediately when i said i probably should ve said something at the time so the pattern is i do something innocent he interprets it badly he accuses me aggressively i explain what i actually said but also apologise and promise to do better anyway vs he does something actually bad he doesn t apologise in the moment i point it out much later in a different context he dismisses it as just a joke i press the point he then says he shouldn t have done it i don t know how he sees these situations and sees me as the fragile and defensive one i have tried to explain to him how transmisogyny so often manifests as uncharitable interpretations of neutral statements that are blown out of all proportion and that when he sends me a message doing exactly that it sits within the context of how this has been done to me and other transfems for our entire lives and normally results in social exclusion messages like his accusations are a pavlovian bell to transfems that warns us social exclusion is coming we know it because it has happened so many times to us he says i should go to therapy and not put the burden of my anxiety on him to accommodate my irrational reaction to criticism he won t accept that it s not irrational there s a social group we are both in at a meet up a few months ago a trans girl said i feel like the word bisexual should perhaps be replaced by pansexual or some other iden...