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r is a food eating machine he just thinks he needs to eat all day it s exhausting on both me and the budget he loves nursery and walks his little self right in there each week he likes to shake his booty see favorite words above he is super duper silly a couple of weeks ago he moved into the bottom bunk in evan s room it was a hard transition going from his crib to a big bed in a different room but now he s doing great i used to joke that evan and maren were such easy kids that 3 was for sure going to throw us for a loop well maybe i jinxed it because that s exactly what we got what some people would call a normal kid ha ha it s exciting and funny and wonderful and exhausting and stressful and frustrating all at the same time just the way we like it sort of mostly posted by memory bybee at 10 01 pm 3 comments monday october 10 2011 father son campout and let s just go ahead and wrap up the campout idea with the father son campout i don t remember many details about this other than they stayed up until some ridiculous hour like midnight or something hello that s something that would ve never happened with the moms there ha ha oh the difference between michael and i parker looks pretty wiped here and i seem to remember him coming home a beast but they had fun of course parker didn t own any shoes besides his crocs when they went and michael didn t want him wearing his crocs so i sent him with these shoes that i thought were a little too big when they came home and i saw the size i realized they were about three sizes too big and when i saw these pictures for the first time i realized yes those look like clown shoes on him i m glad he didn t fall and get hurt the pterodactyl nest or that s what they called it they found an egg shell in there michael thinks something like an ostrich hmm this look on evan s face typical that s just the kind of kid he is i m glad he has a friend like noah he s a happy kid i think evan needs him to balance out his negativity ha while the boys were gone for this campout maren and i went and had manicures and pedicures at the beauty school nearby and then we went out to dinner way fun i wish she and i could do stuff like that more often posted by memory bybee at 11 05 pm no comments daddy daughter campout maren was completely thrilled to find out that our ward would have a daddy daughter campout this year i was thrilled too she needs that special time with dad and i needed the time with the boys well evan mostly but parker is always a fun date they said everything went great except the movie projected onto the sheet outside should ve been a good time right until maren saw that the movie was drum roll tangled yes tangled every little girl s dream movie except mine for some reason she is horrified by that movie hates it i think it s because the villain is hiding under the guise of being the princess s mother sometimes she acts motherly but then she turns cold and mean i think that s why it affects her so much it s not like she s overly scared of ursula or scar or any of the other disney villains anyway apparently when it showed up on the screen she started screaming and crying her eyes out so michael had to take her inside for the next hour and a half to do something else with her ha ha michael had this fun idea to take a bunch of nail polish and get all the dads to do their girl s finger nails and toe nails unfortunately they ran out of time so michael came home and did maren s anyway he loves to do that kind of stuff when i was pregnant with evan and my two bffs were also pregnant all three couples got together for dinner here at our house and michael pulled out some foot soak baths and had all the husband do pedicures on their pregnant wives ha ha i m not sure what the other husbands thought of that but i thought michael was pretty studly despite the movie fiasco it would be safe to say that both maren and michael can t wait for next year to do it all again posted by memory bybee at 10 46 pm no comments tuesday september 27 2011 school school school this picture is from the last day of kindergarten with his teacher mrs hugelier she was wonderful she is totally in the right profession for her she is kind and caring and has very good creative solutions for dealing with crazy kids ha evan truly loved her and so did i he completely exploded in his reading around the middle of the year and over the summer he read all 46 47 of the magic treehouse books plus all the research guides plus probably 15 more chapter books and tons and tons of picture books it s been hard to keep him in books and to find ones that are at the right age level that are interesting to him that he hasn t read but it s exciting this is from his first day of first grade this picture totally cracks me up they wear uniforms and part of that is no crocs well that s about all evan would wear if he could so we actually had to get him some socks thanks sarah so here he is with his socks meeting up with his shorts and even better than that his church shoes i was in complete and total denial that school was starting so soon and i didn t have him try on his shoes from last year that literally just about never got worn until the sunady before school started they didn t fit very well and i wasn t able to go get him new shoes before the first day of school with my level of denial it s a wonder i had his school supplies lunch packed and the right clothes set out ha so he s going to a spanish immersion charter school called arco iris it s a small school only first through fifth grades with smaller class sizes than the rest of the public schools are sporting right now it seems i m happy about that i m also happy that he s learning spanish i think he and michael are really going to enjoy this together plus it s a challenge for his brain as he stated mom i haven t learned anything since preschool unfortunately that s pretty true when he has hard days at his new school i just remind him that at least his brain is being challenged right now i also like the philosophies of their math curriculum singapore math it s been a rough start to the year seven hours in school instead of only 2 1 2 the spanish immersion is really hard and frustrating the first couple of months but i m hopeful for the rest of the year posted by memory bybee at 11 12 pm no comments the magic penny maren swallowed a penny accidentally this summer thank goodness i m married to michael i figured we needed to take her to the hospital but he said we just had to search through her poop oh whew and luckily for me again michael has no aversion to doing it it took four days to make its trip out which worried me a bit and i was getting ready to call the dr and we had a nice little family celebration about it i think michael enjoyed donning his work gloves and digging through the poo a little too much i don t think maren will be doing that again any time soon as a side note we ve been parents for nearly seven years now and this is the first item swallowed not bad eh you ve always wanted to see something like this haven t you truthfully it s pretty cool lots of neat colors so interesting what goes on inside our bodies posted by memory bybee at 11 06 pm no comments blog time out i deserve a time out for my lame o blogging this year ha ha but i m going to spend the next couple of weeks trying to get some stuff up here for posterity s sake after my work is done in the evenings i actually finished all of my work this afternoon so i ve had since 9 00 tonight off got the dishwasher running toilet cleaned carpet vacuumed family room cleaned feels good i wish i could do this every night we could actually have a clean house anyway what s been keeping me away lately stress and busyness between my last post in may and now i became a licensed zumba instructor and have taught as many as nine classes in one week that was only once and it nearly killed me but once i realized i was pregnant that made a lot of sense school ended and we made the most of summer did we have a big vacation no we sure didn t but we hit the library and parks a lot we got together with friends and family we went swimming to the beach twice i don t know what else but it seemed like we never stopped going it was really really really awesome i loved not having school to worry about and getting to spend all day with all of my kids i really did i wish it was always like that everyone gets along so much better and the kids enjoy their time together anyway we also had the stress of starting at a new school for evan with a longer day and uniforms to purchase and work lots of work how about some beach pictures they don t need any captions just to enjoy parker wins for most pictures he was just so dang cute playing in the sand posted by memory bybee at 10 26 pm no comments tuesday september 6 2011 mysterious answer to prayer well i can t believe i that the last time i blogged was four months ago i have a list of about 50 pictures to put on here and some catching up to do maybe i ve lost all my readers ha ha this may be a joke in itself that would be okay this time because this one s pretty personal but i can not let this go without writing it down the short story is that i had a miscarriage four weeks ago tomorrow here s the long story about how a miscarriage was an answer to a prayer shortly after parker was born i wanted to know whether we were done having kids or if we should have one more there were many many reasons to be done but i am a mother with strong maternal voices going on in my head i wondered if we could have a sister for maren my sisters are so important to me i figured that if we were going to do it we should just get it done soon since we weren t getting any younger surprise surprise i prayed about it i fasted about it i took it to the temple i talked to the bishop can you believe he wouldn t tell me if we should have another child or not ha and you know what i never felt like i had an answer i have never been so confused about anything before finally i told michael that we needed to just make a decision it didn t take a whole lot of thought to decide to be done there are a whole lot of things that make this the right decision so that s what we decided and as much as i knew that was right i have had what if questions in my mind for the last year or more i wasn t sure i would ever be able to be 100 content with our decision plus i never felt like i had the confirmation from heavenly father that we had made the right decision michael and i found out i was pregnant on august 4 th it was a surprise considering our precautions and possibly miraculous i don t know anyway i never thought i could find out i was pregnant this was the 6 th time with anything less than pure joy and it was very very strange to me to find that i didn t feel joy i felt fear and anxiety for the next 6 days that i was pregnant i worried about 100 things although i figured that i would come to acceptance within a day or two i mean we were having a baby that s something to be excited about i never really did that s why when i had the miscarriage on the 10 th i was actually more relieved than anything now before this experience i may have assumed that anyone who was relieved about having a miscarriage was something of a monster and must not really love kids not so with me i was shocked to be a witness to my own emotions and then i realized that before that happened i looked at my friends who were pregnant or with new babies and i was jealous i wanted back in the club again i wondered how another baby would affect our family and our future i thought about sisterly love but after the miscarriage all of that went away seriously it went away that very day i no longer have any what ifs go through my mind it no longer bothers me that my sister has a new baby and i don t or that my bffs have more kids than i do and i m not quite measuring up delusional thoughts on my end not theirs it s gone and then i realized that the miscarriage was the answer to my prayer if i hadn t had that experience i would ve been asking what if for probably the next 20 years now i know for a surety that we have made the right decision for our family and you know what our family looks that much more beautiful to me now i could not be more grateful for the lord s mysterious workings in my life what i struggled so long to understand could not have been understood any other way i am grateful that heavenly father knows us better than we know ourselves and he will send us the trials we need and it was a trial even though it was a relief to understand answers to prayers and to grow and understand his power in our lives posted by memory bybee at 10 23 pm 3 comments saturday may 7 2011 11 years ago at this time i was in labor with our first child it s strange how about a week before his birthday every year my subconscious starts to replay the events leading up to his birthday and whether i m prepared to or not i end up having to face those images and memories head on each year i was induced on sunday and the whole week before i had stayed home from work sick with a cold that s a long time to stay home from work sick but i was really that sick the crazy thing is that michael was really sick too i think he s only been that sick a couple of times in the 14 years that we ve been married and other than that he s only been marginally sick a handful of times so we spent the better part of a week sitting and laying on the couch together with a box of kleenex on the edge and mountains of snotty kleenexes on the floor around us we watched lots of movies and tv and talked a lot i ve been thinking the last few days about how nice it was that we had that special time together even though we felt so lousy at the time it was a really really nice calm before the storm and i think it brought us together in a strangely wonderful way i m really grateful for that so on that sunday i realized that i hadn t felt the baby move for a while and tried the old tricks drink oj lay on left side to no avail we went to the hospital and our lives came crashing down around us as we saw dallin in the ultrasound with no heartbeat on this day 11 years ago and somehow my mind remembers all of the pain and plays through it every year at this time earlier today i was crying uncontrollably and poor michael was at a loss because when he d ask me what was wrong i couldn t tell him because i didn t know oh i knew a few things hadn t gone right today and i was a little frustrated about some others but i just couldn t put my finger on it until i realized oh yes this happens every year without me realizing it s going to happen it s a doozy tomorrow is dallin s birthday he would be 11 it s also mother s day bittersweet we had his graveside service and burial the saturday after he was born and the next day was mother s day that was hard 11 years later it is still bittersweet but now there is much more sweet than bitter time does heal ne...