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hemirokai 21h phaeton flier apr 21 follow bear religion probably fucking rocks you re a fucking bear you re the deadliest thing on earth once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months phaeton flier apr 21 the most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you god s chosen animals right there theaudientvoid apr 22 transcyberism apr 22 the species that can take you out are literally wizards with magic boom sticks that instantly wound you from a distance they re mostly just scared of you though if you catch one without the boom stick they re very easy to kill also they leave treasure chests full of delicious food around where they live and if you re smart you can figure out how to open them going into one of their settlements is basically a dungeon crawler rpg biglawbear apr 23 hibernation lasts 6 months in alaska i think truly powerful 5 5 711 8 886 thespectrumsystem reblogged themirokai 1d headspace hotel apr 7 2021 follow idea scene with two characters eagerly stripping each other clearly about to bone but they keep getting interrupted by finding carefully concealed weapons in each other s clothing so they keep just unholstering revealing and unstrapping increasingly ludicrous amounts of hidden guns and knives as the clothes come off and it s lowkey killing the mood a little findingfeather apr 9 2021 alternatively it s not killing the mood at all but it s totally making both of them giggle like they re twelve and possibly get lowkey competitive in a subconscious way about who has the most to drop beyondthisdarkhouse apr 10 2021 the more that i think of it the more i m seeing the incredible intimacy of letting someone know where you keep your backup knife like my god the trust involved in letting someone undress you and learn your secrets instead of popping into the bathroom to change where they can t see and hiding all your weapons under the sink headspace hotel apr 10 2021 oh brainsforbabyjesus apr 17 2021 second alternative you go to hide all your weapons under the sink but there s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink awkward tyrannosaurus trainwreck apr 18 2021 it s not that there s already a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the sink that makes it awkward so much as that there s so many weapons hidden underneath the sink that they fall out of the cabinet with the unmistakable sound of a knife alanche and then the other person comes in like i can explain and you re just dead ass standing there with your own armload of weapons like i can also explain fenrislorsrai may 30 2021 married version is shoving your hand in your partner s clothes when you re out of weapons because you know where their spare is or wearing a weapon in a spot you can t draw from yourself because its now spare storage for your spouse s weapons justlookatthosesausages dec 8 2021 every single one of you is a genius 271 110 212 121 153 thespectrumsystem reblogged going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi 1d cuprohastes dec 23 2024 follow about ten fifteen years ago i wrote a story about a guy living in a capitalist dystopia his walls furniture and tableware are all covered in smart displays basically animated wallpaper it s sold as being able to turn your room or objects into anything a nice forest view outer space a fantasy realm but the companies that run this stuff keep sneaking ads in it gets so bad he s always being woken up by adverts that offer insomnia cures and better bedding that play when he tries to sleep so he buys the ad free tier and it s great for a few months and then he starts getting adverts from premium partners so he goes up a level and the same thing happens so he jailbreaks his wallpaper and sends all the ad servers to 0 0 0 0 and voila he can sleep until this swat team blows his door off and drag him off to jail the ad companies are suing him for loss of revenue for the products he notionally have bought if he d watched their adverts based on some weird the average consumer buys x products with an average value of y calculation the judge is like well i dun wanna annoy the sponsors so he rico s this guy s house and possessions and sends him to jail which is a nice relaxed non volent offender jail for the corporately disenfranchised but because these people have no money there s no ads and now he s happy because the only place he s free is in prison which at the time was a bit much and now it s like called it elon s suing companies for not advertising because he s losing revenue he s also cranking the price of ad free twitter disney and amazon play adverts on their paid service when services used to be free because of the adverts and now you have to pay to watch the adverts or go up a couple of tiers and google s going around freaking out about ad blockers alexaloraetheris dec 29 2024 op did it hurt when apollo s dodgeball hit you and made you write that story 220 41 799 51 999 thespectrumsystem reblogged going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi 1d maythray jan 29 2024 follow the three dots on the side call her by her real name meatballs menu maythray feb 24 2024 im gonna say it now so everyone in my notes stops arguing over this meatballs menu is three dots side by side kebab menu is three dots up and down bento menu is an array of 9 dots in a square shape hamburger menu is three lines horizontally yes there are others but none of them are nearly as prevalent so i dont care enough to list them goot bye gauntletqueen mar 2 2024 literally what they re called btw this post isn t a bit ailurinae mar 27 2024 blastovkatamarinecromancy jul 6 2025 computer programmers are perpetually famished 98 61 896 66 489 thespectrumsystem reblogged themirokai 1d catchymemes may 22 2023 follow wild dogs see a domesticated dog headspace hotel may 28 2023 african wild dogs are one of my favorite animals those huge round circle ears and tricolored coats i love you african wild dogs bunjywunjy jun 13 2023 hey hey how did you get out hey timefortigers jun 13 2023 dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog that1nkyone sep 18 2024 176 59 447 69 572 thespectrumsystem reblogged mallory x 1d derinthescarletpescatarian mar 25 2022 follow if i had time travel i d kill hitler if i had time travel i d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated you re all thinking way too small if i had time travel i d stop neil armstrong and buzz aldrin from dying on the moon due to soviet sabotage kicking off the great nuclear war and devastating half of the planet stavarosthearcane mar 25 2022 good job derinthescarletpescatarian mar 27 2022 this post gets me every time it s from two days ago fam how many times could there have been heroofthreefaces mar 29 2022 do you think no one else has time travel derinthescarletpescatarian apr 23 2022 happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since i made it derinthescarletpescatarian oct 5 2022 surprise reblog stop it s been months months you can stop roach works dec 1 2022 wow if only you had a time machine transdaughterofthesun dec 23 2023 honestly having reached a billion notes i think it s safe to say that in the year of our lord 2041 this is the most popular tumblr post out there derinthescarletpescatarian dec 23 2023 i m killing your parents before you re born iforgotmyfandom dec 23 2023 idiototheinternet dec 28 2023 still here why d you hesitate derinthescarletpescatarian derinthescarletpescatarian dec 29 2023 your mum s ability to hold up under active gunfire was really hot i m your dad now lizyarikus dec 29 2023 isn t that the plot of terminator anexperimentallife jan 30 2024 where do you think the plot for terminator came from what if i just did jan 31 2024 this is such a classic trainwreck post that has the vibes of a 2014 screenshot posted to pinterest and then the last addition is just last tuesday i can t even derinthescarletpescatarian feb 1 2024 imagine how i feel mrsjdavis apr 3 2025 post live forever gif by stahl konigin derinthescarletpescatarian apr 3 2025 it doesn t have to smegorl apr 3 2025 yes it does bookwyrmbran apr 9 or at least until 2041 230 179 958 131 920 thespectrumsystem reblogged themirokai 2d talvin muircastle apr 16 2020 follow gryffindorcls apr 16 2020 wow i did not see that coming 46 52 660 56 852 thespectrumsystem reblogged mallory x 2d geekydemigodinthevoid jan 4 2020 follow i love that the internet saw people comparing women and other alienated groups of people and went they re dating and they support each other we re improving as a society geekydemigodinthevoid jan 4 2020 does anyone know who these artists are they re brilliant and i d like to credit them geekydemigodinthevoid jan 4 2020 cell113 jan 5 2020 this is how to take a trash opinion comic and make it better thank you ophidahlia jan 10 2020 the best genre to ever have existed bowie boy may 30 2020 these improved my day surprisebitch jun 2 2020 gay rights criizomheavvn deactivated202111 these are the only things in the world i find worth crying for becayse it s so fcking cute and wholesome wtf ghost writer143 oct 9 2021 i would like to announce that the og artist grew out of their i m not like other girls phase and now the girls are canon cipheramnesia nov 14 2021 the guys i respect artist also came out as non binary generally got more accepting it s growth getoffmybog nov 21 2021 i follow the artist for the book club art nomsikka on instagram 715 168 975 202 589 thespectrumsystem reblogged sherdnerd 2d jovishark apr 9 follow some advice for people entering their 20s dont go to the emergency room with dental problems go to the dentist bagged greens are cheaper than pre made salads taco bell is not worth the money anymore 1 4 cup mayo 1 4 cup sour cream 3 tblspoons pickled jalapenos 2tblspoons of the jar liquid 2 tsp paprika 1 tsp cumin 1 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion powder salt pepper all in your blender creamy jalapeno sauce dont quit your job unless you have a bunch of job interviews lined up immediately after use resources food bank unemployment housing assistance financial aid etc yes there will be paperwork but do it dont stay awake longer than 20 hours you will start to become impulsive and cranky resting for 20 minutes is better than trying to stay awake for every 2 hours you spend looking up close at screens spend 20 minutes looking at something far away from you stretch your wrists a lot dont do that yoga stretch where you roll your head around your shoulders youre grinding down the joints in your neck be nice to your friends bullying them as a joke gets old if you need a ride somewhere at least offer them gas money brush your teeth at any time of the day but especially before you sleep dont snack in bed if you can help it make your bed the clean teeth zone keep floss picks by your bed dont tell your boss youre adhd autism depression suicidal dont trust your coworkers with that you never know how people will take it and its none of their business train your pets to go to the front door when they hear a fire alarm get regular oil changes 8 18 947 41 233 thespectrumsystem reblogged unpredictable probabilities 2d quietwingsinthesky apr 11 follow do you think bowser ever gets anxious after kidnapping peach again that he went too far this time and he calls mario up in the middle of the night to make sure they re still on for tennis and gokarting next weekend quietwingsinthesky apr 11 painstakingly dialing mario s landline on a comically small telephone only for luigi to pick up instead and he has to ask him to put his brother on the phone not that luigi isn t part of weekend plans but like this is really more of a mario bowser situation and it d be rude to drag his brother into it if there s a problem so anyway then luigi puts the receiver down to go get his brother and bowser sits there tapping his claws on his table and this is agony actually he shouldn t have called at all it s late enough at his castle so it has to be even later over in the mushroom kingdom but just as he s about to put the phone down mario answers all chipper mario mario speaking who s a calling which is a ridiculous question because there s no way luigi didn t already tell him and bowser has to ask him look mario i know i dangled peach in a bird cage over a pit of lava the other day and when you showed up i let my son throw giant flaming hammers at you and there s no hard feelings about that right and there s a few seconds of silence before mario laughs and reassures him it s all in the day s work of a plumber an explanation bowser has never thought to really question since he only knows two plumbers and it does all seem pretty in their wheelhouse and then he s embarrassed for worrying so much so he tries to end the call quickly but mario just ribs him about how badly he s going to lose the next race and then he starts asking bowser how junior is and does bowser want any of the leftovers since he and luigi really do cook way too much for two be a shame to let it go to waste and by the time bowser manages to hang up this has gone from leftovers into him and junior and the koopalings all being invited over to the mario household for dinner so long as they don t park their airship on the front lawn and leave the cannons at home quietwingsinthesky apr 27 op approved tags you re the only person here who sees my vision 35 11 473 20 187 thespectrumsystem reblogged thesetwoutes 2d louisegluckpdf dec 7 2024 follow next dynamic were sexualizing is that of a bull and a toreador star thief jan 6 2025 30 623 36 264 thespectrumsystem reblogged sherdnerd 3d curioscurio dec 30 2025 follow when i tell you i had to do a double take because i thought these were 2 parts of the same whole joke snotty sneezeburger may 3 i had the exact same reaction to this 148 42 576 84 703 thespectrumsystem reblogged zigzag wanderer 3d zeldaspeaks mar 29 2018 follow cleaning with adhd is a nightmare it s an endless cycle of finding a half finished chore and stopping the one you were already working on then remembering that something else needs to be done and getting started on that then finding half finished chore and jumpingjacktrash mar 30 2018 i have the solution i call it junebugging have you ever seen a junebug get to grips with a window screen it s remarkably persistent but not very focused all that matters is location how to junebug choose the location you feel you can probably get some shit done on today be specific not the bathroom but the bathroom sink you are not choosing a range you are choosing a center you will move around but your location is where you ll keep coming back to mentally stick a pin in it consider yourself tethered to that spot by a long mental bungee cord ...