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his wise and aeons old spirit shaman i remember going back to the dining hall and sitting in silence people kept coming in asking me if i was ok the truth of it was i was in a bit of shock but i would have done it all again in a heart beat i knew that this was my path it all felt so right this is a very short version of the whole account but maybe that is best saved for tales around the camp fires it is something i dont think i will ever forget and i will always look back on it with very fond memories of a true spirit wolf shaman much love peacefull warrior xxx permalink 3 comments seeing the filaments of life april 5 2007 at 1 22 am energy work meditation personal experience psychic ability shamanism written 06 2006 in the last few years i have upped my level of meditation and vered off into the direction of south american shamanism techniques i have been using my crystals a great deal more and have them along side me as tools im not a stranger to the south american shamanism toltec shamanism by any means so i was very suprised when i managed to accomplish something that i believed existed but didnt believe we were able to see in toltec shamanism as well as many other beliefs it is believed that there threads or filaments that connect everything together if you could analyse just one thread you would find all the knowledge and history in the entire universe some believe that this may be where the theory of the akashic records comes from recently scientists have found actual evidence of the filaments in space these filaments are sometime referred to as webs or threads but it is all the same i never believed i would be able to say that i had seen these threads but it now seems that i have i was in a deep meditative state my breathing was very slow and relaxed yet still had a functioning awareness with a crystal in hand i was calmly looking up at my ceiling allowing myself to feel rather than see i then saw a very fine luminous glowing filament moving very slowly across my face my eyes followed it as it very slowly moved infront of me and i watched it move into the center of the room as it did so the thread burst into thousands of these filaments the light coming from the center of the room was really intense but did not hurt the eyes to look at the filaments were at every conceivable angle it was as if my room disappeared and became a web of luminous energy i am disappointed in myself as my first instinct when all the threads appeared was to run the experience was so intense i found myself downstairs in a matter of seconds literally shaking thankfully my father was there as i began to garble away desperately trying to tell him about it at the same time it had dawned on me that if the filaments truly existed then so did everything else for me the web would always have been the thing that would prove to me the extent of the energetic world it would have proved that all the things our friends don jaun matus and carlos castaneda had talked about and said were real truly did exist well thats happened now and my poor little mind is going at full speed trying to take in the fact it all exists maybe this sounds like the ramblings of a mad woman to be honest i dont care anymore i have had an experience that i never thought would happen i have been on the path of the spiritual warrior for over 10yrs and many doors open up along the way this however is a whole new level an energetic world within an energetic world any old beliefs i had still been holding onto have now been finally blown away no more holding onto ideas or concepts that are out moded now is the time to let it go much love peacefull warrior xxx permalink 1 comment the butterfly visitor april 5 2007 at 1 13 am animal totems meditation personal experience psychic ability shamanism i felt honoured when butterfly spirit paid me a visit it was completely unexpected a gift to start a new life with she came at night time into my room in the wood cabin my parents and i were holidaying in we had chosen to go to wales our first family holiday for 25yrs there had been a great sense of anticipation for me that this holiday would be a turning point in my life i was not sure of why i felt this but i just trusted my instincts a month before i had just come out of rehab at haslar hospital i was being treated for chronic fatigue syndrome or m e now was my time for a physical and psychical detox away from my daily life and home i had been nurturing a bond with butterfly for a few years without much thought as to why butterflies and dragonflies had become power animals for me my spirit totems that and hummingbirds along with another of my totem spirit animals little fox i had known hummingbird and little fox for some years but i was only just getting to know butterfly she carries many new lessons gifts and challenges we were staying in laurghane wales in a wood cabin on a hillside overlooking the estuary the area was so beautifull and magical at the bottom of the hill on the high street lay laurghane castle that vibrated with a thousand energies despite my m e and constant leg pain i ran up many stone spiral staircases to the very top of the castle and then out on to the ramparts that overlooked most of laurghane and the estuary this truly was a place of magic and inspiration on our first night in the cabin i was having tremendous difficulty sleeping and so indulged myself in reading my books instead i became aware of a slow measured flapping sound like a sheet in the wind as the sound continued to invade my awareness i put my book down and saw a true image of nature and spirit as one from the other side of my room came a most beautifull butterfly about the size of my hand its colouring was absolutely extraordinary with strong hues of electric blue emerald green onyx black and tropical pink it was truly like nothing i had ever seen before the butterfly crossed the room towards me and very slowly flew over the length of my body it almost came to halt in mid air and then flew out through the door and once again into the night time for me it was a truly magical moment and also one of colour beauty spirit and wisdom butterfly visits often now in various ways sometimes physically sometimes symbolically and sometimes spiritually i always welcome her into my heart and home where she lives forever in my soul much love peacefull warrior xxx permalink leave a comment how trauma created the shaman in me april 5 2007 at 12 45 am mayans personal experience shamanism toltecs it is not always easy to give up your old ties to the world and fall head first into the spiritual side of life not is it always right for everyone either i was continuing with my day to day life quite happily or so i thought not wanting to give up the many things that i felt were important to me a part of me knew that i wasn t quite on the right path but i remained content to continue with healing at a healing centre and giving psychic and mediumistic readings to an audience once a week i knew that i was so close to where i should be the final sacrifice of leaving your old world behind stepping out of the 9 to 5 materialistic world is such a hard thing to do when you do you find yourself grieving not just for your old life but for the things you thought were important and sometimes the poeple you thought were important too the knock for me came when i got ill i have had m e chronic fatigue syndrome for about 8yrs but have learnt to live with it my final blow came 5yrs ago this time my life was under threat from a little known foe i have a very rare genetic illness called vkh it stands for vogt koyanagi harada syndrome the immune system attacks all pigment in the body the eyes the inner ear the lining of the brain and spinal cord the digestive system and so on so on one morning i woke up with only half of my vision all i could see were colours light and shapes i was terrified i went straight to eye casualty centre where they battled to save my sight my optic nerves were detatching which required injections of steroids into the eye itself i had 3 injections into my left eye and 4 into the right i had to be awake at the time to they doctors then took me into another room where they took lots of photos and scans of the eyes luckily for me a locam from moorfields eye hospital in london happened to be there it was meant to be his day off he was a malaysian man his name was mr kok dont laugh please this man saved my eyesight nobody else knew what was wrong and my eyesight was getting worse by the minute he asked me hundreds of questions about my childhood my ancestral line whether i ever found pigmentless hairs or not i was so confused i turned out that the recessive gene that causes the vkh came from my grandfathers line we have latin blood in the family and the spanish ancestor we traced had shipwrecked in scotland when the spanish armarda came here how bizarre a gene that hadnt shown up in the family since marc o polo times just happens to switch on in me i couldnt believe it the syndrome is only usually found in the poeple who used to travel the old silk trade route why i dont know but thats how it turned up in me so im one of about 10 poeple in the uk with this crazy illness in the first year that it struck my life became a living hell i had meningitis 6 times over three months this happens when the lining of the brain becomes swollen and is a part of the condition the pain was truly unlivable i would lose consciousness quite alot due to the pain thankfully it means i dont remember very much about the worst attacks the first attack was one of the worst my bloodpressure went nuts at 255 over 160 i really thought my head would explode i couldnt talk due to pain but luckily as i said i kept passing out over the next 3 months i went from 8 1 2 stone to 18 stone because of the medications i had to go on a type of chemotherapy to stop my immune system attacking my body which left me with numerous health problems and i had to start using a wheelchair i had stretch marks appearing so fast that some of them would actually split and bleed i was a mess within a year i was 80 percent bedbound i couldnt gig with the band anymore that part of my life had gone and it was the thing i lived for five years on and im about 70 percent housebound which is much better than i was i dont have to use a wheelchair anymore except for when i am very fatigued but i still have to walk with a stick i still need strict rest periods through the day but i am coping better it would seem that the vkh is now in remission but could easily come back it usually attacks poeple in their twenties and poeple in their fifties my eyes are now healed and although i have been left with some blank spots of vision my sight is almost back to normal and all the scarring has gone sitting in hospital beds taught me alot about life i got the crash course on what is truly important in life so many of my beliefs or ideas on how you should live your life were blown apart i started to listen to what my body was telling me and what my subconscious was trying to say i was already spiritual but now i explored my own personal beliefs instead of trying to fit in with someone elses i thought i was alone in my ideas until i came across the toltec shamans of meso america all their ideas and beliefs fitted with mine rather than me trying to fit with them the mayans came after the toltecs and some chose to continue with their religion for want of a better term in the form of the priests and priestesses thanks to them the toltec way of being was rescued and is still practised the only famous known followers of toltec ways i can think of are don jaun matus the man who trained carlos castaneda and victor sanchez who has written many books also florinda donner a female shaman and author and don miguel ruiz who has written books such as beyond fear a toltec guide to freedom and joy teotihuacan the place where men become gods is the sacred center of the toltecs thirty miles northeast of mexico city the toltecs retained and passed down through oral tradition secret knowledge of healing and spiritual transformation which has remained intact for thousands of years traditionally the word toltec defined a group of poeple who achieved a rarified level of spiritual enlightenment they became known as the toltecs most who follow a path akin to toltec shamanism have been through a major trauma of somekind and in the fifth year of that trauma the person becomes aware of the toltec way no one quite knows why but it has been long documented and even researched i am in the that fifth year and it was this year that i found the toltec way life has some strange avenues twists and turns most of which are meant to be some we can change and some are our destiny most of us sleepwalk our way through life but some of us if we choose to wake up get to open our eyes and really see the world and its energy much love peacefull warrior xxx permalink 4 comments welcome to the toltec path april 4 2007 at 3 04 pm aztecs mayans shamanism toltecs welcome i would like to welcome you to the toltec path the toltecs are spiritual warriors infact they reffer to themselves as warriors toltec warriors are shamans from an ancient philosophy pre dating the mayans and the aztecs their beliefs and philosophies were adopted and kept alive by both of the civilizations and so have been brought into the present day with most of their knowledge lessons and techniques intact amazing considering the invasions and wars taking place around them toltecs are warriors fighting their own battle wthin them selves their aim is to be able to free themselves from the domestication of man most of us sleepwalk our way through life following a set programme that we all have living the life of a toltec is about learning how to turn that programme off so what do you think are you still following your programme one of the hardest steps for us humans is the realisation that the world around us is but a reflection of ourselves we only see feel and think what we know after that we bring the shutters down to keep out any unknown thoughts or ideas we actually wear blinkers as a lifestyle choice you do however have the choice of pushing past the shutters and taking off the blinkers it is by no means an easy choice you must decide to shake up your world in order to do so for some people life is just much easier to stay in the arm chair and watch the television after all that is how we update our programme isnt it we sit infront of the television and download the latest add ons and up grades spending so much time perfecting your programme cant leave much time for finding out who you really are can it so are you ready to jump down the rabbit hole like i said welcome to the toltec path much love peacefull warrior xxx permalink 2 comments recent posts the lunar tree calender beth luis nion new contact details for peacefull warrior coping with 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