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uperficial but there is nothing to fear the truth is that you were carrying these emotions inside of yourself before you became aware of them now that you sense your true feelings you simply need to learn healthy ways to deal with them there are many resources you can draw from to learn to navigate newly discovered emotions the tools which can help you express yourself honestly and compassionately with another human being include non violent communication techniques and active listening skills these are best learned with the help of a trained professional such as a therapist or relationship coach investing in your communication and intimacy is one of the most powerful ways to take your sex life to the next level 5 create sacred space taking sex to the next level requires the space for that sex to occur a special place and setting can be achieved in a variety of ways which appeal to the five senses experiment with incense sensual music candlelight and perhaps an altar but don t stop there create sacred space for your erotic journey by allowing ample time most people allow about 30 minutes for sex including foreplay the average length of intercourse is just 3 to 7 minutes how sad sex shouldn t be a race or a fast food drive through sex needs time to develop into the mind blowing experience we all crave begin by setting aside a minimum of one hour for lovemaking as you increase your capacities for intimacy and pleasure you may find your sexual encounters lasting for hours rest assured i have personal experience with all five of these steps and i know it is common to have some resistance to change even when that change can usher in the fulfillment of our hopes and dreams i thought i had seen it all done it all and i might add very very well but fortunately there is no limit to the heights which can be attained on an erotic path married to a spiritual journey when i found the courage to diverge from genitally focused sex and allow my pleasure to merge with my heart my spirit learned to soar in ways i never dreamt possible the doorway to the divine referred to by the ancients opened for me and i will never be the same what words can describe what i have experienced on this new sexual road there is no language for this new sexuality and that s no doubt best because if i could describe it it would be limited by the words i would use instead my breath expands into this new dimension and takes my soul on an ever expanding journey into the unknown where pleasure meets the deepest longings of my heart is where i find my identity merging with my beloved s and a third entity i can only refer to as god an ache which has been my constant companion since my earliest memories finds satiation for once but that is a small part of what is happening my sense of self is shifting i no longer feel defined by the limits of this body and i know what it means to inhabit a place which is ecstatic and timeless i want to report where i have been and what i have felt but words feel silly in the face of so much splendor making love has been transformed into a prayer as my beloved merges with me in the most delicious way imaginable my fingers trace his body and his orgasm enters my soul with the beauty of a thousand shooting stars speeding through space there is only love and love is all that is like loading posted in uncategorized tagged better sex conscious breathing doorway to the divine intimacy meditation sacred sex sexuality spirituality tantra yoga 1 comment sober escort posted on june 16 2014 by veronica monet the first sober escort i ever met was maria she was a spunky sexy brunette who attended my home group she worked a good program and still had a hard time staying sober for more than a few months at a time maria felt prostitution was an impediment to her sobriety and it was her wish to quit the business someday soon i eventually lost track of her so i have no idea if she ever did quit prostitution nor do i know if she was able to sustain any long term sobriety but i certainly recall the resistance i felt inside myself when some members of twelve step recovery assumed that certain professions or sexual orientations are inconsistent with a life of sobriety read the rest on the fix share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on x opens in new window x like loading posted in uncategorized tagged alcoholism escorts god higher power prostitution recovery sobriety spirituality twelve step meetings 1 comment veronica monet in her own words posted on april 3 2014 april 3 2014 by veronica monet nearly three decades ago i entered a life of sobriety which catapulted me onto a path of spiritual growth and service there have been many steps along this journey first i hosted a local cable tv show on which i interviewed hundreds of guests about a variety of topics which called to me over the course of five years eventually i found my own voice as an activist for women s empowerment and sexual rights i became a popular spokesperson for these causes at first i was on discussion panels and then in front of classrooms but before long i was sought after for major newspaper magazine radio and television interviews i spoke from personal experience about my own healing journey as an incest rape survivor and a recovered alcoholic addict i was angry and outspoken but the media loved me and over time i learned to deliver a more sophisticated message which even incorporated a sense of humor giving keynote presentations in university and college settings i discovered not only that i had an activist message to convey but also that i carried in my heart a great love for my audiences this changed everything and i became less angry and more empathic people often came up after my talks with tears in their eyes requesting a hug and expressing confusion as to what was happening to them i knew i was touching them in deeply personal places and i knew that the larger topic the one we were not speaking about directly was something central to the human condition eventually it became apparent to me that my audiences were deeply moved by the fact that i created a safe place for them to explore their shame without feeling judged shame had been a feature of my early life growing up in a religious cult and as an adult i was committed to moving past that crippling emotion and realizing my full potential as a joyful being i invited my audiences to share in that with me and many of them found this to be a powerful gift as part of my refusal to allow shame to dictate the course of my life i had entered into a very controversial profession after graduating from college and after getting sober my path would shock many while simultaneously empowering me to deepen my healing and spiritual development in ways i might never have anticipated i didn t enter into becoming a high end escort lightly as a college graduate who spent seven years working in corporate settings and as someone who had been clean and sober for a number of years i questioned whether this was in integrity with my spiritual path rather than refer to conventional thinking on the matter i turned to my innermost knowing and quite frankly prayed my ass off as well a great deal of research and training went into my decision and because of this deliberate planning i enjoyed a very successful fourteen years in the profession as part of my unique interpretation of what it meant to me to be an escort i incorporated my spiritual journey into my professional pursuits learning ways to heal and love my clients this involved helping them to release repressed emotions and express their truth in a shame free setting i cared for my clients and i found great fulfillment in my work as a high end escort so why did i leave the profession in 2004 at a time when i was regularly making 15 000 a date for three reasons first i was tired of dealing with law enforcement the last few years of an otherwise glamorous career as an escort were marred by an arrest for prostitution this was followed quickly by an audit by the irs which i passed with flying colors since i had always paid my taxes as a prominent voice for the sex worker rights movement i could look forward to continued harassment by law enforcement second i decided to stop escorting because i had grown bored of working with my clothes off i enjoyed helping my clients feel and explore their emotions it had created a lot of healing for me and my clients to be sure but it had outlived its usefulness and i was ready to touch my clients hearts without touching their genitals finally i never intended for escorting to be a lifelong pursuit contrary to popular stereotype there are many sexy and successful women over 50 working as high end escorts but that wasn t and isn t my calling from an early age i entertained fantasies of writing professionally and had somehow come to know that i was meant to be a published author by the age of 45 and so i quit my very lucrative escorting job at age 44 and moved into a little mountain cabin to write a book i had no book deal i just felt in my bones that it was meant to be true to my intuitions i did get a publishing contract and i authored my first book at age 45 in 2005 my first book sex secrets of escorts was published by a major east coast publishing house alpha books division of penguin books rather than write a tell all to titillate my readers i wrote a sex manual with plenty of commentary about healthy boundaries communication and reversing gender roles in the bedroom but while the book deal came easily to me the transition from high end escort to couples coach was at first more challenging the stigmas attached to my former profession are great i could have changed my name in order to reinvent myself but i wanted to unashamedly share the special insights and wisdoms which have come to me through this uncommon path i am fortunate to now have a thriving clientele who seek my coaching acumen for the emotional spiritual and sexual issues which complicate their lives as a sex and relationship coach i reveal challenging things about myself and thereby model a lack of shame this opens the way for my clients to be candid and share things with me that they often have never said aloud nor told another living person my clients feel safe to share their past and their truth because they are assured that i will be accepting and non judgmental i also maintain a sense of humor about things that many people take far too seriously this frees my clients to laugh about things they might have spent years feeling ashamed of i also have a gift for understanding both the male and female perspective that is probably due to the fact that as a woman i am quite comfortable with masculine as well as feminine energies but whatever the reasons my clients are often surprised how well i understand their experience regardless of their gender for me bridging the so called gender gap comes second nature and that makes it possible for me to facilitate very powerful role plays for heterosexual couples both men and women have suffered greatly because of popular myths which teach us that we cannot understand the opposite sex instead of studying our partners as if they are aliens from another planet it is imperative that we learn how to build bridges which can span the current gender divide rigid beliefs about how males and females are supposed to feel and behave breed shame in all of us this shame not only burdens us with feelings of low self worth shame also bends our personalities into unnatural and reactive perversions of our true selves so that we are no longer able to access the full measure of our creativity and optimism weighed down by shame we are more likely to exhibit cynicism and anti social behaviors in this way shame creates a social fabric which is emotionally shut down and violent whether we experience shame about our gender our race our sexual orientation our sexual behavior and or fantasies our socio economic status our educational level our monetary success or lack thereof the results are the same shame lowers our self esteem and infects our relationships with secrecy and distrust sexual shame is perhaps the most entrenched and the most often defended but all forms of shame create a society which is fear based instead of sourced in joy because i am passionate about creating a world where each of us is afforded the opportunity to fully express our unique gifts i am passionate about eliminating shame i invite you to explore the shame free zone here you will find tools and resources to free yourself from the tyranny of shame and move toward a fuller expression of your truth and your gifts please explore the many free resources including an online community forum where you can connect with others and feel free to contact me directly veronica theshamefreezone com especially if you wish to take advantage of my skill sets and insights over the phone or in person share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on x opens in new window x like loading posted in uncategorized tagged addiction anger management couples coaching marriage media money politics prostitution recovery sex work sexology 1 comment slut shaming and whore bashing posted on january 15 2014 by veronica monet the threat of slut shaming and whore bashing hangs over the head of every woman alive shaping her interactions with others into a reaction instead of a true response perverting authentic sexual desire into a defensive stance against being seen as a slut or a whore as a sex positive feminist i ache to merge the concepts of the whore and the madonna so women everywhere can heal from this dangerous and preposterous split as whole beings women have the right to claim their intellectual power and their bold expression of sexuality without apology without feeling somehow torn between these equally important aspects of themselves i am out to prove that women can simultaneously be intelligent sexy dignified and powerful without adopting patriarchal dogma or sacrificing our connection to our nurturing and intuitive side such a cultural shift would mean that the next time a woman runs for president we would spend more time analyzing her political platform than her fashion sense it would mean that hilary clinton could express herself as a mildly sexual being without being mercilessly condemned in the press for wearing a blouse with a low neckline moving past our collective fear of the whore would free untold psychic emotional and creative energies in at least half the world s population imagine all those women fully empowered to further much needed solutions to the world s problems yet it is only sexually empowered individuals who possess all their power being sexually empowered does not mean taking up pole dancing or wearing lipstick although if that adds a sense of empowerment to your life go for it it does mean redirecting much needed energy away from defending one s sexual purity or...