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description=Views from Contemporary Composer Jimmy López Bellido;

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this, share, and, the, symphony, set, voiceleading, on, personal, growth, artistic, enlightenment, halftime, separating, art, from, artist, in, residence, with, houston, you, are, still, here, camera, focus, action, epiphany, sonic, vision, birth, of, is, it, inspiration, recent, posts, archives, categories, meta, email, subscription,

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ective on life one starts to understand things that one wasn t able to just a few years before and that knowledge is not transferable one can try to give all the advice one can to younger generations but even when they pay heed to their elders advice there are things that can only be truly understood by experiencing them in the flesh the passage of time is essential for some things to be fully comprehended growing older also means having more responsibilities under one s wing old age is often associated with wisdom experience and resilience and i can already see why getting old can be wonderful but it can also be tough and at times cruel i say cruel because the older we get we get to experience more loss more pain and more rejection but those things are precisely what make us take a look into ourselves and search for our innermost qualities enlightened people of old age are those who despite all their pain and suffering have become with time more forgiving instead of rancorous loving instead of resentful generous instead of selfish and spiritual instead of materialistic these collective qualities coupled with self knowledge and awareness amount to wisdom and it is not an easily earned virtue love above all is the motor of the universe it s an irresistible force of attraction that is constantly being fought by it s preeminent opposite hate their constant tug of war sets the engines of the world in motion writing the all well known novel that plays out on our everyday lives artists play a preeminent role in this eternal dispute and can consciously or unconsciously choose to side with one or another things are not black and white of course and there are plenty of nuances in between beauty can be found in light and in darkness but our choices will ultimately reflect our degree of self awareness and yes wisdom i have experienced many a thing that life has to offer during my 40 years on this planet but i also know that there is plenty in store for me i saw my father grow old and ill wishing he had done some things differently asking for forgiveness and understanding but i also saw him being content with a life that even though it hadn t fulfilled all his expectations had made him a proud son father and husband he passed away not achieving his dream of becoming a luminary in the annals of architecture but he did manage to raise two children who were able to fulfill their academic ambitions to the highest degree his pain felt to him at first like punishment but it had the healing effect of uniting us his family to a degree that we hadn t experienced before from pain came healing from suffering deliverance and from sadness great joy through him and his pain we his loved ones had a glimpse into the beauty that awaits us when we surrender to the inevitable we tend to fight resist and look away from everything that is too painful to look at directly but every now and then life has a way to make us confront those issues face to face leaving us no option but accepting them or rejecting them in denial pain is a desperate attempt of our body or soul to focus on whatever needs healing but instead of facing it we prefer to numb ourselves either via physical or spiritual medication indefinitely postponing our learning and thwarting our path to wisdom by now some of you might be asking what does any of this have to do with art or music for that matter the short answer is everything if the music we produce is to be a true representation of who we are we shouldn t choose to hide one aspect of ourselves in favor of another and if we do we are not embracing ourselves completely and therefore our music will not be totally honest most of us don t hold ourselves in very high regard so we try to emulate the great masters the great men and women who have preceded us but have we asked ourselves what is it that made those people great wasn t it perhaps their uniqueness don t we detect an incredible amount of originality in a beethoven for example yes we do but that originality is not only an artistic manifestation of an aesthetic choice it is also a result of an embrace of personal pain to the point that it was transmuted into grandeur and beauty therein lies the true philosopher s stone our capacity to churn happiness out of misery and reconciliation out of grudge we are imperfect beings oh so imperfect but it is that constant tug of war between our lazy selves who want to remain unchanged and our greater higher selves in search of enlightenment what makes possible for art to exist at all we make art and we make music because we need to express something that we can t otherwise express we know that within us lies a power greater than ourselves that needs to be released and that only belongs to us partially because once it is outside of us it spreads its roots into any and all fertile soil it may encounter we as artists and specifically as composers are vessels carrying a fountain of love knowledge and beauty that we don t deserve to keep to ourselves but we are not empty vessels we need to perfect ourselves so we can become an even purer more dynamic and more enlightened channel of communication whoever derives arrogance and self indulgence from this unique position is committing a travesty it is not our place to feel superior that would be a sign of ignorance instead whoever recognizes him or herself as a vessel must do everything in their power to perfect themselves so they can become better vehicles at the service of a greater scheme after the loss of my father my mother has seen a steep decline in her mnemonic abilities the constant suffering in her soul is making an even greater dent in her mind serving as a painful reminder that both soul and intellect not only reside within us but also depend on each other to function properly i can t compose if my emotions are out of balance and i can t invest my feelings on something that does not excite my intellect at all this is where youth and old age collide while young we think we can attain anything we put our minds on but then reality kicks in and we realize that we are simply not always able to achieve everything we want we think we can conquer the world with our physical mental or spiritual prowess but we hardly recognize that we can only achieve one of them when all the others are in harmony how many times have we seen young athletes or actors mismanage their careers because they were blinded by their rapid success how many intellectuals have succumbed to the traps of the mind before realizing that their minds alone cannot lead them to enlightenment and how many artists have fallen into producing innocuous works of art after failing to realize that they need to further their intellect if they want to produce meaningful and spiritually relevant work this is why artists like johann sebastian bach and hermann hesse have such appeal to me because they truly represent that communion of all aspects residing within us we must embrace our own totality even when we are focusing on a very specific aspect of ourselves hence the myth of the great but immoral artist yes we can separate the work from the man but we cannot separate a man from his work but here is where we need to be cautious because even though we might think that morality is universal it is more personal and more obscure than we are ready to admit old age is our chance to look back at our lives and bring all the scattered elements together it is our chance to create a unified self that is a true representation of who we are and who we aspire to become it is a work in progress for old age is relative and detached from temporal attachments old age is in sum the moment we distill our own selves leave behind all impurities and do justice to the self we deserve to be our full potential attained to the best of our abilities we will always have regrets no matter how much we try to keep them to a minimum there will always be things we could have done better but what matters in the end is that as humans and especially as artists we do not turn a blind eye to any aspect of our selves and that we embrace and transmute all our imperfections so we can create the least imperfect version of our everlasting selves and now back to stretching share this share share on x opens in new window x share on facebook opens in new window facebook email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print like loading posted in reflections tagged age aging awareness communion enlightenment growth loss love old age pain philosopher s stone self knowledge spiritual suffering surrender transmute vessel wisdom 2 comments halftime posted on december 17 2018 by jimmy lópez bellido photo courtesy of melanie o neill houston symphony i am now halfway into my residency with the houston symphony and we are finally starting to see the fruits of our collective labor the project i am perhaps most proud of is our young composers mentorship project which got officially kick started right before the summer when the selected composers a team from the houston family and myself met in person at interfaith ministries so we could start the interview process with the participating refugees giving six young composers the opportunity to compose a new work for the houston symphony musicians would be an excellent opportunity in and of itself but we wanted each piece to be truly special hence the decision to pair them with six artistic partners so they could create interdisciplinary works involving dance film poetry and song what makes this project truly unique though is that in addition to that each composer artistic partner duo got the opportunity to interview a refugee through interfaith ministries who went above and beyond to help us bring this project to fruition this is what gives this project true human depth and the inspiration for it came early through my conversations with my houston family when we gathered back in the spring of 2017 to discuss what shape my residency would take i asked what made houstonians truly proud to my surprise the number one response had nothing to do with the space program although they are extremely proud of it as well diversity that was the word that came up over and over again houstonians are proud that their city has become the most ethnically diverse metropolitan region in the united states coming from the bay area though another extremely diverse region i know first hand that diversity does not necessarily equate integration so by throwing into the mix a group of refugees who have come to houston in search of a new life i knew we were going to create connections between two groups of people that would otherwise never overlap it has been incredibly rewarding to see how much they have all learned from each other as i learned from my own experience when meeting with so called dreamers as part of my research for the oratorio of the same name photo courtesy of melanie o neill houston symphony after much careful planning and schedule juggling all parts involved finally met in november for out first workshop all six composers had a chance to show their works in progress and i was a first hand witness to their creativity and stylistic diversity this was also a first for me in terms of mentoring young composers and i must say i thoroughly enjoyed it what a difference it makes to work on a project as part of an ongoing residency as opposed to a one off kind of event the actual planning started over a year and a half ago not only that we still have a second workshop scheduled for february of next year where we will have a chance to focus on more technical aspects related to instrumentation orchestration and the marriage between music and the other disciplines involved mentoring also made me discover other aspects of myself first i had to learn how to diagnose in situ what each composer needed to focus his her energies on which meant i had to immerse myself in another composer s work within a very short time span and i also had to articulate my thoughts quickly find the right words and find the right balance between being sharp in my critiques but also insightful and encouraging it was great fun to be on the other side of things as i have attended many a master class myself in the past some good and some frankly forgettable this project will culminate with a concert where all six interdisciplinary works will be premiered at white oak music hall a flexible not your usual classical music venue in june of next year it goes without saying that we are all very much looking forward to this concert but the truth is this project is more about the process than the product itself and we are all certainly enjoying the process as it is meant to mentor and inspire every participant every single step of the way from inception to completion my sincere gratitude goes to everyone making this project possible houston symphony university of houston rice university and interfaith ministries and special thanks to professors anthony brandt and rob smith for opening the doors of their respective composition departments and to the amazing houston symphony family at large white oak music hall in houston running parallel to this project are my other composition projects with the orchestra so far the houston symphony has played three of my works two of them prior to me officially becoming composer in residence the third lago de lágrimas was superbly performed by flutist sami junnonen and the houston symphony in february of this year and it marked my first time working alongside maestro andrés orozco estrada next may i will finally be able to unveil aurora which is dedicated to powerhouse violinist leticia moreno and i say finally because the original premiere had been slated to take place in september of 2017 but hurricane harvey had other plans also next year andrés and the houston symphony will premiere my symphony no 2 ad astra which is inspired by the space program and the role that nasa s emblematic johnson space center has played on several missions finally my residency will culminate with the presentation in the spring of 2020 of dreamers an oratorio for soprano mixed chorus and orchestra that i have written together with nilo cruz we felt it was necessary to present this work in houston as it sheds light on another aspect of the immigrant experience in the u s and relates to the young composers mentorship program and the work we are doing with the refugees who have valiantly shared their stories with us the oratorio is dedicated to all dreamers around the world who left their homes in search of a better life in the hopes that their newly adopted homeland would grant them the basic rights and privileges that every human on earth should have access to the world premiere will take place on march 17th 2019 in berkeley performed by soprano ana maría martínez conductor esa pekka salonen and the philharmonia orchestra of london while the houston performances in ...