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description=We use the words widow, widower, and orphan, but there is no word in our vocabulary that identifies the bereaved parent. So, I coined the term willower®. From the words willow, a weeping tree that symbolizes deep mourning; and willpower, that creative source within that provides the superhuman strength and determination it takes to continue…;

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willower org rewriting life after unimaginable loss skip to content willower org rewriting life after unimaginable loss close collapsed home about book blog connect menu expanded home search we use the words widow widower and orphan but there is no word in our vocabulary that identifies the bereaved parent so i coined the term willower from the words willow a weeping tree that symbolizes deep mourning and willpower that creative source within that provides the superhuman strength and determination it takes to continue on despite unimaginable loss readjusting to living without our deceased children though we are never detached from them is an ongoing unpredictable and lifelong relearning process there is no final goodbye no recovery or end only rewriting our stories the ones we tell ourselves so that we can keep going so no if your child dies you will not heal augusten burroughs this is how surviving what you think you can t it took me five years to come to this truth when i heard this listening to the audiobook this is how surviving what you think you can t by augusten burroughs the burden i d been carrying thinking i should feel less pain less sorrow shifted i think you too should come to this truth sooner than later because oddly knowing the truth helps the pressure to feel better gets released in time you can move forward instead of waiting for the healing to happen you can exist and do and function and somehow though it seems impossible you can learn to live again while remaining unhealed after the death of your child after experiencing the worst loss or trauma of any kind we have to redefine who we are or who we want to be in this world continually there will always be that painful void rewriting our story helps us to process learn find meaning rethink and recreate ourselves sharing our stories helps us crawl out of that hole and connect with others we can heal from a lot of things but not this kind of injury wanting to heal from this is an impossible goal learning to rewrite your story is a more realistic one one step one hour one day at a time the idea of rewriting began here a few months after sam s death i didn t want to survive i was at a point of giving up when a wise someone suggested you may remain blocked by the ending you did not choose or you may rewrite your story his story with a different ending that one simple word rewrite became a lifesaver the word rewrite may not resonate with you but you can take that line that wisdom and fill in the ending with whatever works for you right now go ahead try it and see what happens you may remain blocked by the ending you did not choose or you may _____________________________ did you do it did you revise the line so it works for you drop me a note i d love to know what ideas or words you used in your revision note sometimes i just fill in the blank with a simple go for a walk hello i m deanna after the sudden death of my beautiful boy sam 2007 i created this site to share my experience as a bereaved parent it took almost 16 years of rewriting to finish my award winning book willower and now i m ready to reconnect with you here and share more of what i know about rewriting life after unimaginable loss writing a book which involves a lot of rewriting gave me purpose a reason to live perhaps it was also a way of embodying sam he was only a boy but he was an old soul and an aspiring writer who didn t get to finish the stories he was working on i like to imagine that we were rewriting together i can t wait for you to meet him in the ending chapters where i bring him alive if only in my imagination this site and my book willower is for you if you ve experienced loss especially the death of a child if you know someone who has experienced loss especially the death of a child if you support or counsel the bereaved if you re seeking inspiration and are interested in learning how to rewrite your life after here s hoping while i continue rewriting my life i hope my voice inspires and uplifts you and helps you in rewriting yours receive an occasional note from me type your email subscribe i won t share your address or send you junk opt out anytime posts his name remembered spoken and written today s not so different from any other day really only a marker in time nineteen years time has dulled my sorrow into a tolerable ache which i ve learned to live with and reshape somehow into words near even when far away it s monday march 2 your birthday twenty eight today my beautiful boy grief grabbed me again 5 minute read for the first few months after sam s death i suffered stabbing headaches in and around my eyes narrow angle glaucoma the ophthalmologist said yours is the worst i ve continue reading grief grabbed me again life lessons my mother sent me 3 minute read i just wanted to say to all of us to her my mother and to you wherever you may be in your story happy mother s day saving the past scanning photos and memories 5 minute read i felt like sharing this a huge project i ve started i m scanning thousands 5 900 so far of photos puzzle pieces of my life over the decades it s a tedious process but feels necessary for me to move forward into the next chapter of my life here still 1 minute read sam i m still here i m still counting moons 223 since you ve been gone eighteen years two of your lifetimes how can this be too much time has passed continue reading here still another birthday 2 minute read morning i am here sitting outside meditating eyes closed feeling the sun on my face rising imagining for a few minutes that it s him shining on me continue reading another birthday discover the art that speaks to your heart 3 minute read the heart wants art i didn t know that the mona lisa painting became popular after it was stolen talk about absence making the heart grow fonder we continue reading discover the art that speaks to your heart what to do with those sad gone thoughts write 2 minute read longing for those who are gone january 28 twelve years ago today was the day rebecca decided would be her last and i m missing her my longtime continue reading what to do with those sad gone thoughts write share this share on facebook opens in new window facebook share on linkedin opens in new window linkedin email a link to a friend opens in new window email print opens in new window print leave a comment cancel reply this site uses akismet to reduce spam learn how your comment data is processed search type your email subscribe facebook wordpress follow willower org on wordpress com home about book blog connect about a book about grief about journaling on walks rewriting life sam willower memoir the term willower is a registered trademark of deanna kassenoff copyright 2026 deanna kassenoff contact willower org website powered by wordpress com subscribe subscribed willower org join 159 other subscribers sign me up already have a wordpress com account log in now privacy willower org subscribe subscribed sign up log in copy 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