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humorous obituary humorous obituary jane doe an unemployed lay about and occasional personality died suddenly in a compromising position at a bookstore on december 22 2013 of exactly what you would expect she would like you to believe that she was still 29 years old jane was born in portland or on february 4 1962 to gary and corrine doe and was almost immediately a disappointment she kept this up by becoming a radio dj by age 16 rather than a doctor as her father wanted or a person with a sense of decorum as her mother would have preferred she graduated from portland state university in 1984 with a degree in communications that provided her with nothing but another way to say smart aleck things as well as about 50 000 worth of debt on may 12 1986 she somehow managed to convince kevin crane to marry her and move to the backwater town of philomath or where she remained the only person on public radio with any flair whatsoever as evidenced by the numerous death threats she received she also started writing a weekly column called life or something like it for the willamette weekly on april 17 1988 jane produced her only truly notable achievement her daughter helen carol crane jane s best moments were those spent teaching her daughter to read write and perform in plays she also heartily enjoyed singing dancing and doughnuts jane had no feelings whatsoever on the subject of iceland she is survived by her ex husband kevin her daughter helen her son in law jacob daniels and benedict cumberbatch whom she hopes will mourn her appropriately she is preceded in death by almost every person who ever lived on this planet including shakespeare gandhi and the comic genius george carlin she will greatly miss the taste of peaches funeral services probably won t be allowed in any reputable house of worship mourners and celebrant of jane s passing can attend a memorial service at the smith family funeral home at 2 00 p m on december 29 download this obituary template free formatted and ready to use with microsoft word google docs or any other word processor that can open the doc file format download obituary template doc format index of obituary templates
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