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5 2021 self realisation 16 comments i am at this middle age where i see others doing better than me their careers are progressing well getting more recognition and pay then there are others who are making more money and are deemed more successful than i am their kids are smarter than mine their cars are flashier their watches have more diamonds than there are numbers if i keep on thinking along these lines i m quite sure i ll get a mid life crisis but here s the thing that s the cue for me to take a step back and re evaluate my life so far the young should and must take over the old otherwise society becomes stagnated and takes a backstep and everyone suffers it s a natural progression for the next generation to step up and eventually take over the previous one but am i ready for this change cognitively this is rational and logical but i m more than just rationality i think i have it easier because i don t have colleagues i work alone and that shields me from a lot of pressure from comparing with others there s no water cooler gossip about whose kids did better in national exams no rumours about who got a bigger bonus my blog saved me too it allows me to network with many people from different slices of society some older than i am some younger this gives me perspective and also comfort i think it s good to know friends younger than me so that i can guide them along with life s milestones and share my experiences mentor them and guide them so that we can also share their successes vicariously friends who are older than me provide me with the reassurance that things will turn out fine and will help me when i face one of life s obstacles if i am with my peers only i ll have a much narrower perspective of life and that can only be bad i think it s important to see beyond the material world and find meaning i mean i m middle aged and have reached the halfway mark of my life and what have we got to show people at this age will start to think back and see if they still want to continue wasting the second half of their life doing something that they dislike if not the sudden realisation that time is not on their side might force them to do a career switch become deeply religious or spend more time with their family and loved ones these are observations that i ve made for me i don t have a full blown mid life crisis it s just a gentle realization that the stream of my life is no longer in the white water region all fast and furious aggressive and relentless the time for that has passed and my life stream is now gently meandering around river banks it is calm and peaceful and that s how i hope to see my middle age defined as live long and prosper read more tuesday march 09 2021 astrea vi bonds buy or bye tuesday march 09 2021 3 comments there is a new bond offering for astrea vi bonds the sponsors of the bond come from astrea capital vi pte ltd an indirectly wholly owned subsidiary of azalea asset management pte ltd which in turn is wholly owned by temasek holdings that name should not immediately give you assurance of the safety of this bond and is not in any way guaranteed by temasek or azalea so please be aware of that bond details 1 maturity date 18th mar 2031 2 scheduled call date 18th mar 2026 3 expected raintg a sf a sf 4 interest rate 3 00 pa payable semi annually on 18th mar and 18th sep each year 5 special features a if the bonds are not redeemed back in full on their scheduled call date i e 18th mar 2031 which is five years from now there will be a one time 1 0 pa step up in the interest rate i e to 4 0 pa b a bonus redemption premium not exceeding 0 5 of the principal amount of the bonds is payable upon redemption if the performance threshold is met on or before the scheduled call date 6 the bonds will be listed on the mainboard of sgx on 19th mar 2021 9am so you don t have to wait till maturity if you need to liquidate your holdings however you have to sell at whatever price it is transacting on at that point in time which depends on supply and demand the bond will mature 10 years from now in 2031 at par value if it is not redeemed at the scheduled call date 5 yrs later in 2026 7 the conditions to redeem back all the bonds on the scheduled call date is as follows a the cash set aside is sufficient to redeem all the bonds fully b there are no outstanding credit facility loans once all the conditions are met the bonds must be redeemed at the scheduled call date failing which there will be a step up in the interest of 1 0 pa as stated above in point 5a 8 min amount to apply is s 2k and thereafter in multiples of s 1k with an admin fee of 2 that is paid upon application you can apply through atm dbs posb ocbc uob or internet banking websites or mobile apps can t do it from ocbc mobile app closing date and time 16th mar 2021 12 00 noon 9 i m not the best at explaining the cash flow and priority of payments for the investments here s a nice pictogram taken from the prospectus that i cut and paste here for your perusal click to enlarge taken from the prospectus 10 the nitty gritty details can be found in the prospectus here my take 1 the last publicly listed bond from astrea is back in 2019 that s for the astrea v private equity class a 1 bond i wrote about astrea iv bonds here and eventually subscribed to it and it s doing pretty okay even during the mar flash crash where it plunged to the near par value of 1 it had recovered with the rest of the stocks in sgx 2 back then in 2018 the bond has an interest rate of 4 35 with the possibility of stepping up to 5 35 if not redeemed 5 yrs later in 2023 i know it s different times now but 3 seems to be a little hard to part with my money especially if there is a real risk of losing your capital is it enough to risk your capital for 3 pa you have to answer that yourself 3 this is not a fixed deposit and must not be treated as such yes it s a higher interest than a fixed deposit but the capital is definitely not guaranteed do not associate the safety of this bond with the name temasek holdings 4 i m 70 sure that i m not going to apply for this i thought of getting some for my parent s retirement portfolio but nah better not risk it especially for 3 i m still holding on to the astrea iv bonds though and will likely hold until they recalled it back in 2023 the 30 why i am thinking of buying this is to replace the astrea iv bonds that i m very sure will be recalled back in another 2 years time i e 2023 i m currently using this as another place to park my emergency cash i m just afraid when the time comes to tap on it the value might drop way below my principal like during the mar flash crash of 2020 5 based on a quick behind the envelope calculation the already publicly traded astrea iv 4 35 bond is traded at 1 056 at last close so it s giving a current yield of about 4 1 pa which is higher than the newly issued astrea vi bonds at 3 pa but don t forget that the astrea iv bond is now trading at 1 056 which is above par value so when it s redeemed back at par value of 1 00 you ll lose 0 056 too capturing all these details the yield to maturity of the astrea iv bond is at about 1 5 pa but we haven t included the bonus 0 5 of bond principal upon redemption at the scheduled call date included that bonus we have a yield to maturity of 1 76 pa still lower than 3 pa of the newly issued bond this means it s still better to apply for the astrea vi 3 0 bond at par value all of the above information could have errors i try not to do it but it might still happen please do your own due diligence and i do not take responsibility if you act on the above information in any way not say you win money you ll donate some to me right so if you lose money don t blame me update i made a mistake and mentioned that the last time astrea issued a bond was back in 2018 i was wrong it s supposed to be in 2019 for the astrea v bonds i ve already made adjustments to the post read more monday march 08 2021 my naive views on financial independence monday march 08 2021 self realisation 20 comments last time i was quite naive probably still am but hopefully less so lol i thought that after reaching financial freedom i can relax no need to work shake legs and spend my passive income and i ll be happy i calculated my expenses to be 2 5k per month that s before i have a lot more adult responsibilities like the current me which works out to be 30k per year assuming 5 returns per year i just need to get 600k capital and i m settled and that number just gets anchored in my mind for the longest time i am naive because 1 on paper having 600k 5 per year can settle my monthly expenses but it just makes my life easier i still have to work because there s no buffer i can t sleep well with 100 invested in the market as well in practice i need more than 600k probably 30 cash buffer will be very nice which means a total of 1 mil is a more realistic figure to aim at 2 2 5k is really just good enough for me at that point in time i m at a different life stage now with more commitments so 2 5k is just not enough i didn t account for future life plans back then or rather i didn t know what changes it will make to my expenses to account properly for it 3 5 returns per year this is based on average returns i am below average because i m not wizardry material i know now but i didn t know back then i thought i can be warren buffett but i am just 我人不肥 i know myself better now and have a more grounded expectation based on data rather than hopes 4 thinking i don t have to work after financial freedom is really naive on paper everything is fine but i did not have a more holistic view of financial freedom in the past it s all just about money but progressively i think financial freedom is more about philosophy ultimately it aims to resolve the question of what we are going to do with our lives here it is more about meaning instead of materialistic pursuits if we don t have a meaningful outlet to pour our life s best work in we ll never end up free regardless of whether materially we are financially free or not hence i adapted this fi financial independence koan on the outside nothing has changed after fi we still do the same things as before but on the inside everything has changed our mindset and attitude are not the same and we will approach the same task with more purpose and meaning don t expect life after fi to change drastically on the outside it s all happening on the inside where no man can see live long and prosper read more wednesday march 03 2021 sharing my emotional upheaval wednesday march 03 2021 5 comments whenever i m feeling moody or easily irritated i try to correct my own biochemistry first this means that i will settle all my physical bodily needs do i have enough food water rest and leisure time if i don t have any of these i will try to correct them first and see if i feel better most of the time i do usually i don t have enough sleep and i m always surprised by how much a good night s rest or even a short afternoon nap can do wonders for my emotional stability but if i did all these and i m still feeling miserable i think there are some deeper issues at work here there are a few types of issues but i m not an expert so i will rather not mislead i can only share the ones that i ve experienced before a long long time ago the stock market crashed and i lost a large percentage of my networth how did i lose it i keep averaging down as it goes down thinking that the fundamentals are still intact eventually i can t take the losses and cut them off at a huge loss that stock is longcheer is it still around i m not sure in hindsight i lost more than the money i lost confidence in myself and i was suitably depressed for about 3 4 months i think it was quite serious because others around me can feel my gloominess and i even entertained thoughts of suicide that s when i knew it was bad i eventually clawed my way out of it by working hard i realised that by working i can put the needs of my students ahead of mine and for that time being i can forget my own troubles but at night nighttime is the hardest period to go through if you re depressed there are fewer distractions and you just have to deal with your own troubled mind alone i guess i m lucky that i got out of it on my own i might sink so deep that i can inflict irreversible self harm that episode made me stronger and more empathetic regarding such inner turmoil it s quite useful in my line of work since students these days are so highly strung up that they might be just one trigger from crumbling catastrophically i heard that more and more young adults too are facing tremendous stress and are suffering emotionally i have recommendations to make for anyone who needs such help i have a good friend patrick who did a mid life career switch from it to counselling counselling is not exactly a field that one associate with making big bucks so you can be sure he switched because of his natural passion and affinity towards it nobody i know makes a career switch midlife because he wants to make more money as his primary reason though it could be a side effect patrick is now doing an internship working for his clinical hours he has started accepting clients for therapy and it is 100 free of charge and with no obligations and no hard sell to sign up for packages the sessions are conducted on google meet fully hipaa compliant and will last typically 60 to 90 mins per session if necessary face to face sessions can be arranged near ocbc center on saturdays what have you got to lose at worst you wasted your time only since there s no financial cost to this at best you find the right match for a person that can guide you out of your underlying issues for people who needs this i think it s a godsend patrick comes highly recommended by me since we ve been good friends for many years i might even consult him except that i can t because he adheres strictly to sac ethical guidelines so he can t do therapy for friends family due to dual relationship issues this is not a sponsored post by patrick he didn t ask me to do this and i have no financial gains for referring clients to him i just want to help him and believes that he can help others since i trust him enough to endorse him personally for his services you can reach him through email at patrick toh solace asia read more monday march 01 2021 i have a spate of good luck recently monday march 01 2021 self realisation 32 comments i had a spate of good luck recently in the past week or so firstly my car that was parked got bumped by another person let s say that the driver is a male for convenient s sake it s not a huge dent since cars that are parking are moving at a slow speed the good thing is that he put an ang bao on the windscreen with his contact details and is willing to pay for the cost that s cool i have had people bumping into my car and running away secondly my washing machine died on me i had used it for 10 years so i guess it got tir...
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