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ur current candidates wins the election but i digress their sacrifice of free healthcare and the ability interject eh and i m sorry for no apparent reason is not something that they will easy part with however it is their determination to reset the balance of democracy in favour of something a little less ridiculous that fuels their belief that they are the one true hope for your nation also it s important to note that wiggles will absolutely release her tax returns and salem has never been allowed to use our home server to access any of his work related emails if you could see wiggles and salem right now you d see that their passion for governing is second only to their love of naps and snuggles so it is with a humble heart i would like to give you this alternative on november 9th because a vote for wiggles and salem is a vote for furrmocracy and let s face it isn t that the best mock racy there rate this posted october 12 2016 by janyceresh in 2016 united states election cats chihuahua dogss election funny humour politics president siamese cats uncategorized united states tagged with chihuahua apocalypse not 16 comments dear god mr trump just won again i know it seems bleak sodom and gomorrah bleak but i was hoping you would refrain from sending in the horseman of the apocalypse for just a bit longer i m not saying that a certain voting demographic couldn t benefit from a strongly worded burning bush or maybe even a very localized weather event in the genre of say a red sea parting or a semi great flood or anything else that might remind them of that little section in the bible that talks about of the perils of deifying a false prophet or just about anything that discusses what to look for in an antichrist not trying to tell you how to do your thing i know you got this it s just if you could possibly give us a sign that this is just big cosmic ha ha i for one would sleep a lot better at night yours faithfully janyce ps in the event of a sudden rapture i would totally prefer to ascend wearing my clothes more for the benefit of others than myself again this would be up to your discretion rate this posted march 16 2016 by janyceresh in uncategorized i m not so maybe you re not too 2 comments i m not a lot of things in fact the laundry lists of things that i am not is quite impressive if i do say so myself for example i am not a man nor am i pigeon or a particularly skilled athlete the latter can be attested to by anyone who has ever watched me participate in any activity that requires both my brain and my body to coordinate in any meaningful way i once dislocated my knee in the 30 seconds it took me to stand up and walk over to the dance floor true story luckily the fellow with whom i had attempted to dance with was able to quickly slam it back into place he had that skill set so while i always knew that i shouldn t walk and chew gum at the same time without a supervising medic i know have to live with the painful knowledge that just plain walking is not something that i am gifted at so i m not coordinated i own that i m fine with it and if i find myself in situations that require me to perform acts that could cause me bodily harm i wear a helmet and make sure my health insurance is current i like being prepared that s my skill set now if i can accept what it is that i am not why can t more people embrace and accept the limits of their own realities so what s lit the fire in my belly that has lead to yet another one of my epic over shares well the answer to that question my friends is simply this crappy drivers just because you can spell the word car doesn t mean should drive one for example if you consistently drive in the left lane a minimum of 10km below the posted speed limit whilst seemingly sharing recipes with the driver keeping pace with you in the right lane you should both immediately pull over put your vehicles in park and burn your drivers license and or your cars now of course there is no law requiring to do so but it is fair to say that driving is not your thing it s ok no one will judge for accepting this simple truth about yourself animals have zero difficulty accepting what they are and aren t capable of case in point you will probably never see cats teaching quantum physics or sharks climbing mount everest i say probably because i am also not a zoologist and i would be remiss in speculating on the possibility of either one of these things occurring at some later date however as of this minute it would appear it is still well beyond their current evolutionary purview so if genetically speaking we are all predestined to live within our own evolutionary constraints why do so many people fight against it with every fathom of their being it s okay not to be awesome at everything it s okay to not to be much good at most things i am in fact the living breathing testament to that statement that being said if you are this driver or you know this driver do mankind a favour stop trying to do what your not good at and maybe just call a cab rate this posted january 23 2016 by janyceresh in breaks canada children do it yourself electronics family funny humour mensa uncategorized tagged with animals cats coping genetics evolution divine intervention warning labels my social indictment of the selfie 24 comments what the selfie is happening to us humans if i see one more teenage girl using her phone to take a picture of herself wearing a surprised duck face i am going to be forced to make a citizens arrest i could you know it s a thing i looked it up the criminal code of canada allows for a citizen to detain and charge an individual who has performed an indecent act now i realize i may be taking some liberties in my interpretation of the law but i have watched the entire series of ally mcbeal and boston legal on netflix so i feel pretty confident that i could make a very strong case i would further argue that the selfie stick should be registered and included in the list of prohibitive and restricted weapons with all these crazy narcissists waving them about in public it is only a matter of time before they impale some innocent bystander and or somebody loses an eye you know the old saying it s all fun and games until somebody s on their way to the emergency room i m not saying they should do time in a maximum security facility but i would definitely advocate some jail time in that prison i ve seen on the show orange is the new black try taking a good selfie with a disposable one shot camera wearing a shapeless prison jumpsuit and posting it to facebook i dare you sometimes i close my eyes and remember a quieter gentler time when people had the good sense to resist the urge to capture every inane moment and faked facial expression that occurred in their lives i m reminded of the days of old when taking pictures was reserved for special occasions like birthdays weddings funerals gathering evidence for a criminal investigation or to leverage a better settlement in a divorce those were kinder gentler times to those of you out there who are guilty of this non crime be warned life has funny way of self correcting and if you insist on taking your picture posing like you just had your lips sucked up in vacuum you run the real risk of capturing the enduring image of an idiot sent from my ipad rate this posted january 14 2016 by janyceresh in canada family funny humour ipads iphones uncategorized tagged with selfie helping hand 1 comment when i reach out to you it is not to gain redemption or for personal gratitude i respond from the grace and spirit in which the call was made i am not perfect i am not grace i am merely the vessel that was chosen to answer your call i give to you what was given to me hope love forgiveness my soul asks only this pay it forward if you see someone in need reach out if you see someone without hope give them the vision of tomorrow if you recognize a person without give from within if you see someone living despair give them peace from the past i don t ask this for me or of you this is for spirit we are all energy which cannot created or destroyed the more we live in the positive the less we can evolve in the negative may love and peace find you all tonight and always rate this posted july 13 2015 by janyceresh in uncategorized the day time ran out 18 comments it came without warning the news it was not supposed to happen this way and definitely not at this moment there were too many things left unsaid and unfinished the reality of the message was too surreal for my brain to take in the words once spoken could not be unheard and yet the realization of what it all meant seemed to come at me in waves they still do even now 3 weeks later in that instant it appeared that all the air had been vacuumed out of the room i could not breathe nor could i comprehend the magnitude of the raw emotion that i felt there were no words the phone had rung and all i heard her say was your dad has passed this can t be right there has been a mistake you see i was planning a trip to go and see him next weekend we were going to plan our trip to england together he was going to show me his london i was supposed to go last year and the year before but i was too busy with work and my kids and my life to carve a week out to spend with him i thought there would be more time but there wasn t the thing about time is that it seems to have a short shelf life and the supply never meets the demand my time with my dad had run out there was no getting it back and that truth is as brutal as it gets i think i squandered my time i wasted it on busyness not this weekend dad and not this time dad because we had that thing but we would definitely come to see you soon it feels lonely here now knowing that he won t be calling me 5 times a day to see how i m doing to ask the same questions over and over and to hear him laugh and say that his mind was going when i gently reminded him that we had spoken only a few hours ago what would i give to hear him ask me these things just one more time time that s what i d give my time rate this posted june 26 2015 by janyceresh in uncategorized children don t come with instructions 23 comments parenting is hard the problem is kids do not come with how to manuals i did ask for one but the doctor just shook his head and laughed i m not talking about the myriad of books available on the subject of parenting i mean a back to basic a to z step by step idiot proof guide like you get with a new blender or anything from ikea just a simple book of do s and do not s that if executed properly will result in the perfect stepford child actually maybe ikea is a bad example because i once had to put together a bookshelf i bought from there and after four days one migraine and a rather nasty leg wound that labyrinth of hell went straight back to the store turns out i may have been reading the instructions in dutch did you know that unlike ikea children don t even have a return policy i guess it s just a you bake it you take it kind of deal the hospital won t even give you a receipt just your baby and a bag full of welcome wagon coupons like fifty cents off of wet naps and a visit from the tupperware lady gives you enough working knowledge on how to raise a child just try calling her at 3 am for instructions on how to calm your colicky baby and i guarantee you will not be getting your free gift i think becoming a parent is hands down the most optimistic thing i have ever done for me having children seemed like an appropriate next step in my life s journey sure i got lost in costco and couldn t boil water without burning a pot but everyone else seemed to be doing it so why not give it a go looking back now i am amazed at the level of narcotic free delusion i must have been experiencing it s logic like that i am now convinced must have preceded the invention of fundies it s a thing google it before i was a mother i couldn t even keep a house plant alive i tried but i kept forgetting to water it luckily children will make a lot of noise if you forget to feed them for any significant length of time and my plants just never seemed to try that hard so i guess even if they don t come with instructions they do have the odd fail safe they will cry if something is wrong sadly they will also cry when nothing is wrong which can be a bit of a conundrum the good news is that so far even without any degrees step by step instructions expertise of any kind or any discernable skillset i have managed to keep all of them alive with my husband s help of course wait let me just double check yes all still alive and well i think that it s important to celebrate the little victories when parenting like this and remembering to pick them up from soccer practice and maybe even getting their name right on the first try not as easy as it sounds it may not seem like mensa material but when mixed with a lot of love it seems to be getting the job done rate this posted january 20 2015 by janyceresh in uncategorized older entries archives june 2017 march 2017 october 2016 march 2016 january 2016 july 2015 june 2015 january 2015 december 2014 november 2014 october 2014 august 2014 july 2014 june 2014 may 2014 april 2014 march 2014 february 2014 january 2014 december 2013 november 2013 september 2013 janyceresh janyceresh blogs i follow the lab report tea first panic later suzie speaks blog stats 12 260 hits recent comments janyceresh on our life is like drywall dust joey on our life is like drywall dust janyceresh on our life is like drywall dust markbialczak on our life is like drywall dust almost iowa on our life is like drywall dust top posts pages our life is like drywall dust you never know where we re going to land babysitting chaos lost my voice so i found a brush your next president of the united states is apocalypse not i m not so maybe you re not too my social indictment of the selfie helping hand the day time ran out children don t come with instructions follow blog via email enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email email address follow join 3 270 other subscribers janyceresh august 2026 m t w t f s s 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 jun categories 2016 united states election cape breton moving art breaks canada casino cats chihuahua children do it yourself dogss election electronics family fitness funny gambling hockey home renovations humour ice crema ipads iphones mensa oil olympics parenting politics pregnancy president rainy days siamese cats slot amchines texas hold em tim hortons uncategorized united states weight working out flickr photos more photos top rated pages just a bit about recent posts our life is like drywall dust you never know where we re going to land june 18 2017 babysitting chaos march 2 2017 lost my voice so i found a brush march 2 2017 your next president of the united states is october 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