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as many ears but we all have influence within our own sphere even if that means teaching our daughters upon which shoulders we are standing i have been reading betty friedman s feminine mystique betty does a phenomenal job at giving an overview of historical events gendered injustices and the continued subversion of women admittedly there are parts of betty s assertions that i think get a bit fantastic let s have a convo about it and i ll show you where but overall the presentation of data and research is impressive it is the cold hard facts that we need to remember we still have work to do and we still have a sphere of influence in which we can stretch our wings even if we never get to fly be brave have courage let us speak for ourselves and get what we deserve we needn t get caught up in the labeled hype created by men and women alike of what it means to be a feminist just be a woman amongst women and men join the cause don t take the privilege you are given as a god given right teach your sons to be better we all have a sphere of influence so wield your powers for good where ever you are p s if you want to have a convo about what it means to be a mormon woman and a feminist i would be happy to talk on that subject too outside of fmh posted by nancy at 1 48 pm no comments labels insights learning tuesday june 30 2015 i just cleaned that place up mother nature should really know better than to do a sister such a dis service before after i enjoy doing yard work that is yard work of my own creation i have enjoyed creating several new flower beds in my yard this year thinning out bulbs and planting new ones i love the park esque feel of our yard with large green spaces and shaded tree areas the kids can play baseball soccer frisbee whatever they like while i enjoy digging in the dirt i love watching them play on the well manicured lawn and yes i take much longer mowing the lawn than needed it is not bad to leave the clippings in the grass but i do not like the grass sticking to their feet and coming inside plus the more i mulch the greener may be a bit ocd about yard work i spent several hours getting rocks out of this front bed more as a therapeutic measure to avoid depression than an actual need to be meticulous the beginning of this summer in indiana has been wet and windy wet and windy i have come to understand this is nature s way of pruning the trees and topping the really big ones i just do not appreciate the messes in my yard saturday morning danny wakes me with there is a lot of wind mom and there is a tree on our trampoline we left all the branches and trees on the ground saturday because it was so soggy outside after torrential rains and josh needed to help de flood the basement at our rental we hoped for sun in the next few days sunday was sunny and with rain in the forecast for monday we got our ox out of the mire while we could and clipped and hauled branches away josh was having trouble with his chainsaw perhaps a curse of trying to work on the sabbath so we just stripped the tree to it s bareness tramp frame is bent but the mat is not ripped we ll have to figure out how much to invest in fixing that we got it cleaned up we figured out the obvious problem with josh s chain saw on monday and set to work beneath threatening skies all the logs are stacked tidily outdoors it is raining again today i keep waiting for summer to come i think i will protest doing any more yard work until lit does come i already have issue with with all the eternal messes i have to clean up with kids being home all day much less adding nature to the mix i m just not that ambitious the kitchen was clean when i went to bed but the time i got down to the kitchen the next morning it had been attacked by the other 4 people in this home and left for me so very thoughtful posted by nancy at 11 47 am 1 comment labels backyard daily updates gripes thursday june 25 2015 what do you remember of summer vacations the first week that the kids were out of school we set off to start summer vacation off with a family vacation for a decade i have planned and executed family vacations but this year i was too busy with school work to think of it and josh was bored at work josh wanted a family vacation like he had had when a kid camping i am not opposed to camping so he planned a little road trip south to mammoth caves national park he did quite a bit of research and i only asked peripherally about how the plans were shaping up rule 1 of delegation if you give them the job let them do it all even if it means somethings may not turn out so wonderful i could see a few hitches in the giddy up but hey live and learn and learn we did we learned that vacationing in the first week of june is wonderful in that there are hardly any tourist s but a bit unfortunate because all the tourist places are taking a break form memorial day crowds before the summer crowds turn up that translated into only 2 of the 6 tunnel tours being offered and all the naturalist hikes being cancelled we had booked 4 nights of camping at mammoth cave but found after one day that we had maxed out on things to do josh and the kids were happy to ride their bikes around the campsite and play catch my body was not particularly happy with the weather conditions nor the meal options josh had planned the meals not forgetting that i couldn t eat certain inflammatory substances but not remembering either that meant that for two days my diet consisted of beef beef and cheetos s sounds like a bad two year old menu rolling into day three we realized that camping further in the dank and cool 70 degrees in high humidity aches for fibromyalgia was not going to be awesome i was willing to troop it out but frankly there as no more to do at mammoth caves do visit mammoth caves it is phenomenal of course we don t have pictures of anything underground it was dark and no flash photography allowed after living my life in the west with all sorts of lava tubes and sandstone formations i was fascinated by the limestone caves i was geeking out the whole time if i hadn t been an english major i would have happily spent my academic career looking at rocks as a geologist mammoth is not famous for the dripstone formations we had seen some of the worlds best at meramec caverns in mo on our way up to indiana but for the sheer length of the tunnel over 400 miles charted and 600 miles more expected that s amazing but you can visit their website without me having to gush about it all if there is a next time we visit we will be in cabins and bring mountain bikes we are gonna wait till the kids are older so we can do more spelunking even though i was achey the whole time viv spent 30 minutes pouting in the visitor center because she didn t want to answer questions about bats and faith peed her pants half way through the historic tour what will remember most about camping at mammoth caves probably riding our bikes and all sleeping in the same tent on we went south to nashville tennessee we had planned to make a day trip of it but with the unfortunate events of mammoth we turned our tennessee time into two nights in a hotel we rushed into town to get some real food and visited the grand ole opry again because of being in the between season stage there weren t just fun family things going on at opry as we had hoped and we weren t staying through the weekend to mash our small kids not a large concert of little big town or rascal flats so the exterior was all we got of that well pictures with large guitars and lessons on overpriced souvenirs the kids at their own spending cash this vacation from their own work which is a wonderful way to learn financial independence but a grueling and non stop litany of smallish children bringing up some of the most ridiculous garbage way over priced and saying with big doe eyes can i buy this mom it s there money so i can t just say no which is what any reasonable person should say in a souvenir shop particularly at the opry when you haven t seen a show or do not know more than two names of country artists past of present as it is their money and their agency i have to tell them in a severe whisper that a 5 pencil is no better than a 25 cent pencil we could get back home they pout a bit and put it back and i push them out of the gift shop to the sidewalk where i can explain the emotional appeal of souvenirs and how such shops get away with raking money out of emotionally charged tourists this repeated itself everywhere we went on this trip exhausting and i don t think it actually was a lesson learned yet is that what they will remember of visiting nashville i will remember the dinner we ate at the opry hotel it was overpriced mexican food but it was real food in a beautiful location the kids will probably remember that we went to a park with an odd old building the parthenon and they got to pose with pillars danny rarely gets cranky on vacation but this was one night where we were up late and he had not had enough dinner at the overpriced mexican restaurant add to that there were not readily available restrooms so he had to be rushed off to a remote bush again did not make him the most pleasant at the parthenon the next day in nashville was a bit more fun we visited the hermitage the farm plantation of andrew jackson i am sure if josh had not been in the medical field for the money he would have been an american history major he has read a biography of most of the american presidents and loved andrew jackson really andrew is one of the top 5 presidents of the us who else do you remember i really appreciated that the audio tours kept the kids engaged throughout the entire morning without having to complain to me and i could listen to all the tracks from rebecca jackson s perspective i am intrigued by the history of the south and learning how slavery was justified for so many years even by very well meaning people i believe i figured out the culprit for the continued inhuman use of black as slaves the foreman that guy was in the worst position ever between the owner and the slaves he made it possible the genteel master to be benevolent and for the slaves to revolt which pegged him as the one with the whip i m not saying any of it was right and certainly my position as a white woman doesn t help me understand the culture or perspective of persecution justifiably it was certainly a lesson on what may have contributed to the problem the hermitage has about 90 original furniture and construction that is amazing in itself the grounds are lovely and this was one place we were very happy that we visited in the early summer months because we could wander around the grounds without being punished by the sweltering summer heat viv told us that if she had lived back in jackson s time she would have been slave we assured her she was not african american but it made me wonder about legitimacy of any brown skinned persons at any rate she did act as though we had punished her and had her headphones taken away and made sullen march out of the last 45 minutes of our visit at the hermitage we probably won t remember that part i will remember how every night andrew jackson would go out to his wife s grave and sit with her for 30 minutes or more we spent the afternoon popping around downtown nashville for some authentic music we did not pay to go in the country music hall of fame again of you do not know 2 famous country singers before you go in it is likely you will not appreciate reading wall plaques about people you don t know especially if you only have a 3rd grade reading level viv was content to see taylor swift s name on the wall outside she was convinced the entire time we would walk around the corner and see her faith just liked to tap her toes to the music of the live band music coming from every open bar on broadway although she did not like when we went into one for a moment to listen to honky tonk because it smelled to thickly of alcohol and danny was intent on getting a loose tooth out during lunch which he succeeded in doing by the end of the meal those events were memorable indeed but what i will remember is that night in the hotel best parts of vacation are not at the tourist sites we made our way back north with a trip past abraham lincoln s birthplace in kentucky inside this impressive structure is a log cabin that was taken apart and put back together to display around the us as the birthplace cabin of lincoln later it was discovered as a fake but it was built inside the structure and now is a replica of the cabin he was born in the most fascinating fact because they rebuilt that little cabin so many times someone came up with the idea of children toys that you could put together and that is the reason that for the first 5 years of my kids lives they called the 16th president of the united states president abraham lincoln log our final vacation stop was at churchill downs home of the kentucky derby the were running qualifying races and we watched 4 good races josh was intent on teaching the kids the financial ruin of gambling and had them root for a horse each race with an ice cream wager only on the fourth race did josh let them box their picks to get an ice cream some day we will go back with fancy hats we did get free fake tattoos promoting american pharaoh who won the triple crown the next day first time since 1978 pretty historic not that we saw american pharaoh but we got an idea of where he ran and how big the jockey s were we had faith walk next to one of the jockey s and she was only a couple of inches shorter than he at the end of an over budget trip will i remember that josh and i were barely talking to each other at churchill downs because i thought the kids should be able to eat until they were full despite the cost of food and budget forbidding have some lemonade to quench their thirst probably not they will most likely remember that we finished the 6th harry potter book on the drive home and are now in the last of the series after a years worth of bedtime reading through the epoch take of harry potter so what do we remember of family vacations sometimes we do recall the crummy parts as the standouts sometimes we don t honestly remember anything more than the pictures tell us which is why we are biased to only save the happy looking ones or the specifically posed ones they remember briefly that we went although at this point in the summer three weeks removed from that vacation the kids are just looking forward to the next vacation planned and the next and the next the past is behind us time to move on posted by nancy at 2 32 pm no comments labels fam fun parenting summer vacation wednesday june 24 2015 boston marathon i don t have a song for that big news today was that the boston marathon bomber said i m sorry those words can heal as can music posted by nancy at 12 53 pm no comments labels insights boy turns 7 i have allowed myself to enjoy the fact that my children are ge...