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Text of the page (random words):
and i have to remind myself to smile an insanity cocktail on the rocks with a chaotic twist order a large side of humor and welcome to my life home about and i have to remind myself to smile an insanity cocktail on the rocks with a chaotic twist order a large side of humor and welcome to my life stay updated via rss yeah i actually post stuff october 2011 5 june 2011 1 april 2011 1 march 2011 3 february 2011 2 november 2010 2 october 2010 2 september 2010 1 may 2010 1 april 2010 2 february 2010 2 january 2010 1 december 2009 2 november 2009 1 october 2009 5 september 2009 5 august 2009 5 july 2009 1 june 2009 10 may 2009 3 april 2009 3 march 2009 4 february 2009 4 january 2009 5 december 2008 3 november 2008 3 october 2008 5 september 2008 3 august 2008 10 july 2008 6 june 2008 4 may 2008 9 april 2008 5 march 2008 5 february 2008 3 january 2008 9 december 2007 5 november 2007 3 october 2007 7 september 2007 3 quotes it s not what you do with your life it s what you do with what life hands you blogroll dear gherkin further records i won t fear love in the beginning there were hot dogs my own brand of crazy still hopeful the littlest bean circus freaks posted 10 25 2011 in life tags kids life 0 so we just spent a good twenty minutes with chase being silly wrestling and quizzing him on animals and their sounds counting body parts and faces moods this kid is way smarter than he lets on day to day it just goes to show you that i need not worry about nanna not being the best at doing learning interactive stuff while watching him we did put him in daycare 2 days a week at a friends house it s made a big difference anders has decided when he has too much homework he will forget it in his locker that way he had more time for playing with friends the result pissed off parents and no more play dates on school days dumb shit i love how kids know everything and think they won t get caught hello i did it already everything you do or think of doing i ve done and i will bust you you re eleven and dumb as bricks i wish i could send them both away until they are 22 with college degrees and non douche bags keep dreaming wow posted 10 20 2011 in life 0 i re read 3 4 of this blog and i had and now see i sort of lost a lot of great people disappearing and you can soooooo tell i m bipolar ha ha well the kids are growing in leaps and bounds and i have quite a bit to tell etc the best part i got a smart phone wordpress has an app i no longer need to sit at a computer to blog like hmmmmm posted 10 19 2011 in life 0 my kids are being good my house is clean it s quiet what s the catch i m sure in the middle of the night the monster will wake and feel terrible cause he s sick such is life how do you get passed something posted 10 19 2011 in life 0 i m angry very angry i feel lost and alone and broken and unappreciated and unloved i feel like a failure i want to be happy i want to start over move passed the crap and learn to be happy again i don t know how to do it how do 2 people go through turmoil anger resentment general bullshit to the point that is all their is and get past it i feel stuck in a vicious cycle in limbo fix it and move on and be happy or end it and move on and eventually be happy how does one move on together forgive forget and never ever bring up all that anger and pain i do not know anyone who has done it no one everyone realizes it is easier to quit give up and move on it is in some aspects especially in the forgive and forget no need it s over no need to forgive and work at things next i want to shit or get off the pot so to speak nail down which it is and figure out how in the hell to go about doing it anyone gone through some serious anger resentment issues with a loved one and actually moved on with them and had it work i need someone else to remind me to smile posted 10 18 2011 in life 0 i ve forgotten many things over the last 2 years how to smile and mean it how to love people whole heartedly how it feels to be loved because i don t feel it how it feels to have medication that works for me what i haven t and will never and never did forget was how to feel broken the definition of insanity doing the same thing again expecting a different outcome only 8 years apart exchange the man in the story and add another young son lovely the futility of finding patience posted 06 21 2011 in life 0 i may complain a lot about my kids like i hate them mostly on face book if you know me you know that is the complete opposite of how i feel about the loves of my life that being said i want to be a better mom a more patient fun mom i want to do things with my kids that are small things that they will treasure like my mom did with me but i get so wrapped up in the stresses of parenting and work and soccer and pto how does one balance these things i do it all in the name of the kids but when i actually sit and think about the time the actual time i am present in their daily lives i know i am not they annoy me they stress me they make me want a break a break from what my life my stress wouldn t spending silly artistic crafty time with them making them happy and less stressed stress me less help me smile and relax why can i not do this after 10 1 2 years as a parent i feel i m failing my youngest anders got all of me all the time fun loving learning i was mentally present all the time chase not so much i feel like a bad parent i also know this is completely normal stuff here but something has got to give i have to find a better balance set some time aside and stick to it with both of them selfishly in the end for my sanity yikes being a mom is hard who s idea was this ha ha i don t know why when the level of stress rises and the level of commitment increases in another aspect why i put the kids to the wayside how can you do things in the name of your kids and bettering their lives but not actually spend time with them one on one creating memories and smiles and just showing in a physical mental way that they are your world that you love them more than life itself i hope someone knows the secret cause i sure as hell don t chase 2 1 2 anders 10 1 2 a furry baby don t shop adopt posted 04 12 2011 in burst my heart fun fun fun life love 4 due to all the patrick posts on fb etc and the horror stories regarding abused animals that have been in the front of my mind we adopted a rescue dog at first i wanted an adult lets face it no one wants a grown dog the same way most people don t want to adopt a grown child sad but true unfortunately having a 2 year old and a 6 year old male dog already i had to get a puppy but she was a rescue she was abandoned with her mother and sister on the side of the road in a box the same foster mom had them for 3 weeks her sister was adopted on thursday 4 7 and we adopted her on saturday 4 9 she is 10 weeks old and the sweetest most well behaved thing i ever met only 1 accident in the house in all these days there is definitely a soft spot in my heart where rescues are concerned and i get so upset when people buy a dog at a pet store because essentially you are paying professional animal abusers to keep abusing meanwhile there are thousands upon thousands of homeless pets out there here she is sweet savannah goes nicely with hurricane memphis don tcha think for my baby seester posted 03 21 2011 in life 2 my sister has been ttc for over 3 years no luck 3 rounds of clomid no luck she ovulates irregularly or not at all on her own been this way since she was 16 maybe she s a little overweight and the dr told her to cut down sugar and lose a little weight her ovaries are almost as large as her uterus yikes so please send some good vibes my way as i would like a neice to spoil and not have to live with ha ha ha she decided to turn over a new leaf of healthy eating less stress and taking care of herself in general things she has been avoiding dealing with by eating as a comfort don t we all know that so here s to hoping i will finally be an aunt for the first time by next year wonderful posted 03 13 2011 in life 1 someone who has been a fixture in my life for over 2 years got some wonderful news and shared it with us i am so happy for my friend monica she is a wonderful person and deserves this and so much more hope is a wonderful thing love you monica did i use wonderful enough ha ha spring is sprunging super slowly and other horror stories posted 03 04 2011 in fun fun fun life struggle things that annoy me 1 so i kept a gerbera daisy alive through the winter and it is about to bloom 5 flowers i have tried this feat for years and failed i know i have several things to digress about and share if anyone still reads it so i m just sitting here debating my topic du jour monster in law technically not since no vows were ever or will ever be exchanged but big diff the woman is unreliable and for lack of a better term stupid she is our child care from 3 months to 27 months and would you believe i found out the minute i left for work she switched his pre school programs to soap net yeah she was talked to about it several times a few weeks ago i ended up driving to work in deadly white out conditions needless to say i made it 1 3 of the way nearly did a 180 and turned around i was out the door all of 40 mins when i walked in she had soap net on anders tells me the reason he doesn t stay home on his days off from school is because all she does is talk on the phone and watch tv no wonder the kid didn t start talking until now she also lets him whine whine whine and gives in all the time now fine you re nana that s what they do fuck that she is in my house and not following my rules take him to your house then she lets him sleep on the couch despite being told over and over we do not want him on it we want him in bed guess who started fighting going to bed again yep and when we finally got pissed and were stern with her she laughed looked at chase and said uh oh i guess we re in trouble and dismissed us are you fucking kidding me so we have a whiner who refuses to stay in his bed and a 1500 couch that gets stained frequently enough for me to want to burn it instead of clean it a woman who does not give a shit about anything we say as parents well i can t wait to tell her we only need her 4 days a week all summer and 3 days a week starting in september i am taking mondays off from work all summer and then my very good friend s sister runs a daycare in her home licensed etc she was an elementary art teacher for years now a stay at home mom who runs a small daycare and just by adding 3 hours to my work week a total of 28 hours a week instead of 25 we can afford to have him in a learning child friendly environment my goal is by sept 2012 to not have her watching him at all i can t stand it walker and i fought and argued and it was like banging our heads against a wall until he finally saw it what she was doing or not doing rather i said put your child first your mom is a grown woman and is ruining our child and stunting him in many way developmentally and having good intentions isn t good enough and none of this is bringing up the fact that she would up and leave for time in va with no notice and call the day she was supposed to return to extend her trip yeah she s that kind of asshole at what point does free child care start feeling like its costing you more than paid child care that s where i m at my poor smart boy who just wants to go go go and learn and explore ended up with a lazy nana who apparently decided now that he isn t a tiny infant she doesn t want to put forth the effort we have begun potty training its not consistent when she s around he talks more everyday thankfully because of playdates with kids about a year older and anders who have helped him along quickly we have started the process of de whining him as well ha ha ha this consists of this is not nana s house and nana is not here stop whining it has been working slowly we shall see if we can turn this little devil into my little angel ha ha ha chase 27 months anders 10yrs chase 2yrs older entries create a free website or blog at wordpress com and i have to remind myself to smile blog at wordpress com subscribe subscribed and i have to remind myself to smile sign me up have a wordpress com account log in now privacy and i have to remind myself to smile view site in reader manage subscriptions sign up log in report this content collapse this bar loading comments write a comment email required name required website create your own website free on wordpress com create your own website start free