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he service closed attendees were encouraged not to dally but many took the time to pay their respects to the family and others had a very long walk as vehicles were parked down both sides of the road for quite a distance such was the crush of people following the service we apparently had atac lex s employer to thank for a great reception on point loma right next to the water and overlooking the san diego skyline walking in the door one instantly encountered the following display sharp eyes will know what is in the upper left corner of the table and as for myself i was so gratified to see two of the pictures brought to the shakespeare s march 9th get together by socalpir8 and me front and center lex s wife had asked us for permission to take them with her which we had gladly granted so it was very touching to see them make a re appearance the reception itself was near perfection with only one flaw that was soon rectified as socalpir8 and an unnamed former naval officer stood at the bar they both discovered there was not a drop of guinness for strength or jameson for courage in the facility they instantly teamed up to solve the problem cleaning out the naval exchange of all but one six pack of guinness and procuring two large bottles of jameson irish whiskey as well the bartender was a bit perturbed when they returned with guinness and jameson in hand but graciously allowed the drinks to be placed on a corner of the bar for all to share a number of naval officers and marines alike were later spotted joining the formal toasts with a guinness in one hand and a jameson in the other the most poignant moment of the reception relates to what is in the lower right hand corner of the above picture it was an informal moment and i felt tremendously blessed to happen to have been close enough to see it develop a distinguished naval officer in uniform was struggling with a tri folded flag that was threatening to unravel its neat triangle when several of our troop of blog readers jumped to assist him in the course of helping it was discovered that he was the current co of topgun and he was bearing a very special gift which he then instantly turned and presented to lex s son and wife click to enlarge and note the date yes it was the flag flying over topgun when lex s plane went down i wish i could ve somehow recorded every single detail and conversation of the reception for it was truly the balm our souls needed to be among those who knew and loved lex as the great man he was as the toasts began i could hear lex s voice in every story see mannerisms and expressions described by family friends and fellow pilots and it was a joy to see the happiness and affection with which he was remembered it would not surprise most to hear that lex was supremely competitive and one pilot spoke of how over the years they d end up in a wrestling match each time they encountered one other including when they met up again as employees of atac a female voice piped up from the back he s not kidding right there in the hallway giving hr a heart attack the liability the original speaker added that since he always had about 30 50 pounds on lex he could win in the first 15 minutes but that he d beat you 45 minutes later he never ever gave up lex s nephew was only two years younger than him due to lex s sister being significantly older and reported the same kind of story he also put a poignant spin on another event one i had never considered in that light as lex had written on his blog he rolled his old jaguar convertible his senior year at the naval academy giving him the nickname car roll but the nephew added some information pointing out that lex had landed upside down in a ditch with the car suspended by the sides of the ditch a configuration that surely saved his life i look at every year after that as a gift from god the nephew said and carroll made the most of that gift he added that we shouldn t so much be sad that we lost lex relatively young but be joyful that we had him for far more years than we had every right to expect i was reminded again of patton s admonition that we not mourn but rather celebrate that such men lived others told great stories about lex s wit including one involving a sister squadron smuggling a live rooster aboard ship that insisted on crowing at inopportune times because it was kept in the dark 24 7 until they were far enough out that it chouldn t be sent back on the cod plane unfortunately that hiding place was next to lex s stateroom one day lex spotted a leader of that sister squadron and went storming down the ship s passageway reporting your damn j o s brought a barnyard alarm clock aboard and the damn thing s broke it keeps going off at 3 o clock every damn morning one particularly delicious story involved someone who had spent time with lex in staff work involving the cutting wit lex fortunately kept sheathed most of the time i suspect those who watched lex engage trolls on his blog know exactly of what his fellow officer spoke thanks to lex s son sno we also got the full story of lex s reaction to sno s decision to go into helicopters instead of jets sno said that the thing he ll always remember his father saying was nothing after sno made his aviation choice he had called his father what did you get lex asked helicopters sno replied there was dead silence on the phone as the silence extended sno became concerned are you still there dad he asked yes came the calm reply i just thought you said helicopters sno affirmed the accuracy of his father s hearing and received the response did you not get jet grades or something he had but had chosen helicopters and soon explained why sno reported to the assembled crowd at the reception that once lex recovered from the shock his father made it clear how proud he was of sno going his own way something that lex had always celebrated and for which sno expressed his deep appreciation and gratitude in his toast the most hilarious moment was supplied by lex s two beautiful and equally poised daughters they referenced the px90 video workouts lex favored when he needed to return to fighting shape for the atac job describing them as great for using to work out or watch for tips or just to listen to as your father pants in the next room it absolutely brought down the house kat his youngest said that for 17 years it had been her life mission to tease harass and generally humble her proud competitive and driven father a role she obviously relished she reported that one day recently she had heard two thumps coming from the 2nd story of her home and called out dad are you okay he reported from his upstairs room that everything was fine but she knew better running to check on him i arrived to see a yoga video still running she said and my father laying on the floor just like a tipped cow i said did you fall over doing yoga she giggled and then perfectly imitated his resigned tone yes i think i broke my hip she looked down with amusement as she must have that day would you like me to help you get up she asked with laughter in her voice again with the resigned and monosyllabic reply yes it was delightful to see those two girls in action full of such love and affection and so very obviously their father s daughters marked with not only his features but his wit and playfulness and of particular delight to me was to discover that they spoke just as quickly as their father did comment was later made by the ceo of atac that some people in his employ had trouble understanding a word lex said because at times he spoke so fast as a fast speaker myself i loved it lex s family made him proud yesterday with the strength courage poise and warmth they exhibited through what was surely a wrenching day for them and those who have been concerned that the family continue to have the support they need will be gratified to know that lex s son was sustained by a number of squadron mates in attendance as well as several marines from his rotc days the girls were well accompanied by a table full of their young friends and the room was awash in love and support during the toasts lex s wife was hailed as a mother to the military base neighborhoods they inhabited and honored for her mentoring of the younger military wives his children were honored for their military service in sno s case and the strength and resiliency the daughters displayed in theirs the family has a long road ahead as anyone who has lost a loved one knows but they will be accompanied on that road with a large and dedicated team of brothers in arms coworkers and friends who will never allow lex or those he loved to be forgotten he lives on in so many update atac has really gone above and beyond what could be expected for both lex and the family now left behind just one in the multitude ways that above and beyond was expressed was in atac s creation of a 100 memorial challenge coins a couple of which gifted from lex s wife herself graced the hands of a few military bloggers and readers by the time the reception was over one side of the coin displays the atac name and logo the other appears below lex s very civilian neighbor of 10 years was in awe of it telling us that his coin would now be used a placemarker on golf outings as whenever he and lex went golfing the day would end with drinks i would turn around and there would always suddenly be two drinks in front of me he recalled with tears welling in his eyes a guinness and a shot of jameson that s what lex always said guinness for strength jameson for courage to lex cross posted at the castle the lexicans read more posted by fbl at 8 09 am categories carroll lefon navy neptunus lex 07 march 2012 the hole in our world rest in peace captain lex lefon john himself a leader of men said it best he was the leader you wanted to be led by a civilian myself i cannot claim the personal experience that proves john s opinion true but i felt it instinctively and i saw that truth borne out in how men and women i admired responded to him every good word i have seen heaped on his memory these last hours is simple fact he was that good as a naval officer as a patriot as a writer as a thinker and as a man you would be blessed to have in your corner i was one of those so blessed i never quite knew whether to call him mentor or friend for there are reasonable restraints when a married male and single female separated in age by well over a decade get to know each other so there was little baring of the souls though at times we each let down our guard a bit and gave a peek into our respective burdens and regrets and you ll never convince me i gave as good as i got on the friendship front for he was the wiser and more sophisticated southern gentleman who seemed to always say and do the right thing while i was the bull in a china shop not always knowing what i was plowing into and sometimes in my inquiries too brazen by half but there was playfulness and teasing at times and thought provoking conversations on topics as weighty as the factors in generational poverty and the moral effects of justified killing and there were kicks in the pants when i needed them and gentle restraint in the needed rebukes he directed my way i learned so much from him about courage and perseverance about leadership and compassion he was an amazing mix of restrained ego and genuine humility for i don t think he ever forgave himself for his mistakes and i have little doubt that his last thoughts included terrible guilt for what he knew his beloved family would shortly be experiencing it was his passion for his family that truly defined him for me his deep admiration for his wife as displayed on the blog was echoed in real life he adored her without reservation and truly believed he didn t deserve her he once said before i met her that he thought she and i would have a lot in common and i considered that high praise for someone who would have lex s esteem must be pretty special like any passionate father he shed tears of love sorrow and fear for his beloved children he marveled at their gifts and i know his heart broke over and over at their sufferings no matter the source of their pain one of the few times our conversations were deeply revealing was when he shared his concern for his struggling teenager and i attempted to give him a bit of insight into a typical teenage girl s mind one of the few areas of humanity he didn t seem to instinctively understand as for me i have written before about what he did for me on a personal level and i do not want to be more revealing on that account only to say that he was of course absolutely right in his evaluation and challenge of me my deepest regret is that i didn t tell him how right he was i had been wanting to do so and had made a mental note to reach out to him in recent weeks i waited too long already i am seeing that my story is not unique and that doesn t surprise me a bit for all his claims that he could be cold or remote his words he seemed to be a lover of humanity above all possessed of the spirit of a warrior with the heart of an irish poet storyteller he strongly rejected the label of warrior philosopher but i became more and more convinced over the years that he was exactly that when someone passes on it is common to say we are diminished by the loss never have i known someone for whom this was more true and here we must add another well worn phrase we are better for having known him i certainly am my dear boyfriend knowing the effect lex had on my life took to saying that he wanted to shake lex s hand to thank him for helping make me who i am the handshake happened at an english irish pub last year but the opportunity to say why it was so warmly given was never afforded i can only hope that lex s startling powers of perception somehow divined the intent anyway captain carroll f lex lefon you left the world a far better place than you found it and with a gaping hole that will never quite be filled read more posted by fbl at 11 56 am categories carroll lefon lex neptunus lex captain departed i first published this in may 2008 when lex retired with the awful news of yesterday i have nothing to say only tears to shed for all who loved him those words i wrote upon his retirement are even more true today i will try to write more in the near future but not now my heart aches too much for words i have struggled so much with what to say here how to honor someone i am honored to know ever since i first read this i ve debated whether or not to say anything more thinking lex was going to have a retirement ceremony where people would get up and say wonderful things about him tipped me toward the negative on that debate wouldn t want to give him a swelled head ya know but here i find out the man is trying to slip off into the sunset sans horse and so i m calling him out i figure i get the chance to say this either now or at his funeral and i firmly believe that nice things about a person should be a...