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Text of the page (random words):
ne i showed new female students areas on campus that had blue lights where phones were located for emergencies why would anyone need protection from winners i realized i wasn t a playa i was jerk to say it lightly i began to do women self defense workshops marie was proud of what i was doing but i had to share with her my most intimate secret i wasn t who i presented to be i detailed my sexual history i told her the extent of my search for sexual power the ways i conducted that quest the purpose it served and the effect on others she hugged me and said thank you she asked me to do her a favor she asked me can you teach boys not to abuse women another enlightening moment i was doing everything backwards i was trying to teach women how not to get abused instead of teaching young men not to abuse i m reaching out to you to do the same here are some of my recommendations where you could start because like myself i think you have some work to do if you are truly sincere about not doing this again don t allow your guilt and shame to ward off confusion tears tenderness sorrow and love when we allow ourselves these feelings the women and children in our lives may be able to feel a commonality and closeness with us rather than feeling driven by us i had to be comfortable not being in control being patient listening offering advice being of service if power and control are essential to who we are these will always be alien but if we want love and connectedness rich relationships with women children other men and ourselves you have to be open to these i had to do was develop a self disgust for the very behavior that i thought defined me i had to look at the damage i inflicted on the life of others that took me dropping the excuses i e it was her choice its all part of the game friends and family may even try to excuse your behavior i e she started it you didn t plan on being abusive you didn t really mean it don t accept the excuses look at your behavior for what it is divorce yourself from the image of playboy ladies man the longer you hold onto that image the further away you get from stopping your behavior that means getting away from your songs you have been so used to producing it means divorcing yourself from the artists that produce music that encourages the behavior it means possibly losing endorsements money and friends but it is an essential part of your healing process keep checking yourself make sure you are always aware of thoughts feelings and beliefs that encourage your old behavior intervene in the patterns and continually fight old ways use your music as a sounding board for the survivors of violence against women use it to help with the healing process for friends and survivors and to raise society s awareness of the extent of the problem of violence against women lastly confront men in the absence of women confront the attitudes when you are not on camera let people know this is the new you and not someone trying to reduce their sentence or come back into good graces there are people out there who are willing to help and support you this is only the beginning be well published in blogroll uncategorized on march 27 2009 at 1 26 pm comments 64 tags abuse domestic violence feminism gender male privilege manhood men misogyny rape sex sexism sexual assault sexual harrassment violence women women and the criminal justice system think of prison populations and you think of men indeed men make up the greatest numbers within the system yet the population of women in u s prisons has more than doubled in the past 10 years how a woman will be punished when she violates acceptable norms reflects the common view of that woman s role in the greater community customary influence by family and community for women has traditionally been effective and much more violent than for men the promise of formal controls which for women carries a heavier toll than for men seems intimidating and could account for the lower female prison population the fact is though that across the world the percentage of women confined in prison is only a fraction of the total prison population yet their sentences are generally longer and harsher the question should be why this disparity when it comes to women and law recent studies challenge the stero typical thinking that women who are imprisoned are bad or whores or unnecessarily tough universally harsher and longer sentences illustrate a partiality the issues of gender role and patriarchal culture must be understood to comprehend the relationship of women to law women in kabul have been targets of intense repression and victims of fundamentalist interpretation of religious law recently a young woman wanted to marry a boy she had chosen and rejected by her parents choice when she appealed to the taliban for help they sentenced her to five years in jail for violating islamic law her two female cousins 14 and 15 were taken to be married by force in exchange for a fee paid to their families while the taliban authority exemplified extremism it is common for the afghan family of the groom to pay a fee for his bride diminishing the woman to property of a patriarchal society in the united states the disparity of incarceration rates for men of african or hispanic descent is well documented for women black hispanic or white the disparity is even sharper the percentage of women under correctional supervision had risen to almost 10 percent by 2006 compared to 1 3 percent increase for men the disparity in incarceration rates for women may in part be attributable to the claim frequently made by women prisoners that they were incarcerated for crimes that were coerced or even committed by their male partners for whom they took the fall under the mistaken belief that a woman would get a more lenient sentence surveys conducted by the u s department of justice also reveal that prior to their own imprisonment the majority of these women prisoners had been victims of child abuse sexual assault domestic violence or coerced drug abuse involving older men in other words crimes committed against them by men presaged these women s incarceration it has been my experience that men commit homicide as the result of extreme rivalry and competition and committed the act in public and outside of the family this indicates to me that men are conditioned from infancy to see their role outside of the family core and into the world arena women on the other hand are socialized to remain within the family unit most women that commit homicide share a commonality of similar background experiences of abuse maybe it is time that homicide be examined as a social issue and cultural phenomenon additionally society is critically unforgiving for women who are believed to have betrayed their maternal attributes while men who commit homicides are viewed to have momentarily lapsed into uncontrollable anger women are seen to have violated their nature the behavior of a man in this situation is seen as an extreme exhibition of his masculine nature even at times more firmly establishing his masculinity but a violation of this nature for a women overturns her identity and leads to her ruin whatever the violation and wherever the country the population of women in prison continues to grow logic would say that women are committing more crime are they really or has society through the utility of formal and informal law changed the intensity of its response to women the advancement of women without a doubt is a pre condition for the establishment of a humane and progressive society united nations a society reflective of that goal can only be measured by the maturity and benevolence of its citizenry and a complete respect for human life published in uncategorized on march 14 2009 at 12 43 pm comments 5 tags abuse activism african american domestic violence feminism gender incarceration misogyny patriarchy rape sexism sexual assault violence women one man s perspective on violence against women breast bruised brains battered skin scarred soul shattered can t scream neighbors stare cry for help no one s there stanza from a poem by nenna nehru a battered indian woman despite differences in cultures and ideologies women seem to face a consistent bias regardless of where they live tied to the social expectations of feminine behavior victimization of women reflects a universal value placed upon them by men violence against women occurs throughout the life cycle pre birth is marked by sex selective abortion china india battering during pregnancy emotional and physical effects on woman effects on the birth outcome and coerced pregnancy i e mass rape in war infancy carries the threat of female infanticide emotional and physical abuse and disparity in access to food and medical care for girl infants adolescents can be scarred by child marriage genital mutilation sexual abuse by family members and strangers more disparity in the access to food and medical care and child prostitution dating and courtship violence i e date rape in the united states acid throwing in bangladesh as well as economically coerced sex africa sexual abuse in the workplace rape sexual harassment forced prostitution trafficking of women the reproductive age carries the risk of abuse of women by intimate partners marital rape dowry abuse and murders partner homicide psychological abuse sexual abuse in the workplace sexual harassment rape abuse of women with disabilities being older does not reduce the risk of victimization in the u s the only country where records exist elder abuse affects mostly women quite consistently women are defined according to traditional patriarchal images and within the patriarchal ideologies and structures of national and international relations judith zinsser researcher for the united nations crimes against women are based on their role in society as a daughter mother wife and sister women are never judged as persons and always judged as passive to their roles a man is evaluated as a man aggressively responding to his situation within his roles in life as father son brother husband secondary to his gender this subjectivity to patriarchy is well illustrated in dowry burnings popular in india murder generally accepted as a crime against humanity takes on a different persona when related to brides who for one reason or another experience with their husbands and husband s families conflict over their dowries in areas that require a marriage settlement dowries become a powerful tool for moving up through social strata in a firmly patriarchal society the esteem of the male depends on the purity of the female not only a financial inheritance the dowry reflects the moral purity of the bride indian dowry effectively functions to disinherit women and promote their economic dependency on men which is the real crux of dowry murders when the dowry is no longer satisfactory the bride becomes vulnerable to harassment assault and death murder is illegal but social norms in india validate the acceptance of such practice marking it virtually impossible to punish anyone participating families involved in this practice place tremendous significance upon the material value of the union between two families and a financial gain for at least one when the woman is sacrificed the families protect each other from civil prosecution further ingraining the value of men and valuelessness of women think about rape in our culture evidence of rape is evaluated by a perceived participation by the woman i e how was she dressed did she invite sex and then change her mind was she using drugs a recent story of a young girl in pakistan who became pregnant as the result of rape unable to convince the court that rape had occurred and since her pregnancy was taken as proof that sexual intercourse outside of marriage had taken place she was thirty lashes and three years imprisonment she gave birth to the child in prison a girl because of this situation women are more afraid than before to bring a case of rape to court and in turn this could of course encourage rapist there is an easy transformation from victim to offender her actions did not change only the subjective political observation of them in the united states a woman illustrated how she was victimized into criminalization she was a chicana introduced to drugs at the age of eleven a victim of brutal domestic violence that caused her to miscarry twice a drug user addicted first to heroine then to the so called cure methadone finally a mother forcibly separated from her daughter on account of her convictions and incarceration and finally a woman who died in prison of a brain hemorrhage the cumulative effect of a lifetime of beatings written from her death bed i hope to have shed some light on the epidemic of violence being perpetrated by us men i hope that we will no longer live by a criminal code of silence and non action its not what you say and do when women are around its what you say and do when they are not take a stand in the fight to end violence against women published in blogroll uncategorized on february 16 2009 at 2 04 pm comments 7 tags abuse african american black child molesters child pornography domestic violence feminism feminist gender human traffiking incarceration male privilege masculinity misogyny patriarchy prison rape sexism sexual assault sexual harrassment violence women yes we can embedded video from cnn video published in blogroll uncategorized on november 5 2008 at 5 51 am leave a comment tags obama i m not voting for obama my name is chello i live in maryland i have a wife and three children i always take my children with me to vote for one the youngest likes the stickers secondly i want them to learn about and be active in the process i m not voting for obama i m voting for my father who in the 1930 s was put in an insane asylum for his relationship with a black woman he was only released to serve in wwii i m voting for my mother who unbeknownst to her gave me the structure to be a proud man and a feminist i want her to be financially secure and not have to worry about her retirement i m voting for my brothers and sisters my best friends and supporters i m voting for my son malakai who can go to school and say i want to be president and not get the same yeah right looks that i did i m voting for my daughter chelsea who can look forward to going to college and a bright future i m voting for my daughter nichole who one day may be able to look up and see that there is no glass ceiling i m voting for the class i gave a career day lecture to because i want their future to be bright i m voting for the prisoners i counsel i want them to be accountable for their crimes but i also want them to feel that justice truly is blind i m voting for my community a community that has more prisons than colleges a community where jobs are few and morale is low i m voting for the plumber who fixes things in my house who still gives me deals d...