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onsider representing my novel the odd i see a 71 000 word work of slipstream fiction following a falling out with her favorite hallucination a half assed stay in the loony bin and entry into the real world by way of graduation from college fifi wants to know what the meaning of life is and she wants to know immediately fifi the odd i see s narrator is twenty two working an underachiever s dream job and struggling to reconcile her worldview with modern middle class american living something about the combination of what her overbearing mother pothead friends and likely imaginary vampire lover are telling her isn t quite jiving with what she thought the world would be like not entirely sure she wants to continue doing the whole existence thing she gives herself a month to reason her way through it piece by piece meanwhile byron the soulmate fifi discovers in the midst of an adventure in pretending to be a prostitute tries to keep her from stumbling over the pitfalls of a society that claims mental illness explains her dysphoria and out of the clutches of a vampire only she can see an excerpt of this novel was published in the spring 2009 edition of the newport review literary magazine a separate excerpt was published in the 2006 edition of loyola university chicago s annual literary journal cadence i was editor in chief of cadence in 2009 and from 2006 to 2008 i was editor in chief of loyola university chicago s quarterly literary arts magazine diminuendo i very much appreciate your time and consideration in reading this letter i have pasted the first chapter below and would be delighted to send you the rest i can be reached by phone at xxx xxx xxxx by e mail at bre jamstage net or by postal mail at 123 xyz st best regards bre kidman posted by rick daley at 6 57 am 9 comments labels slipstream fiction oct 11 2010 query all because of you first revision click here to read the original query forced to kill for sport until the age of sixteen adelaide banvard has been kept at the side of christian wren one of the most powerful men in los angeles and the man who saved her life for ten years she s obeyed his every command and whim the schizophrenic monster in her head enjoying every moment of pain and every drop of blood on her hands but adelaide finally has the chance to escape this life of violence her opportunity comes in the form of atf agent marcus grant a man whose assignment is to apprehend wren the suspected leader behind one of the largest gun running operations california has ever seen adelaide s loyalties are tested at every turn as she fights her way out of wren s organization the power wren holds over her and the attraction she hides for the undercover atf agent who wants her behind bars for murder all because of you is an 85 000 word contemporary and suspenseful women s fiction novel i am an active member in the las vegas romance writer s chapter of romance writer s of america and have a degree from utah valley university in the field of psychology i have accurate knowledge on the subject of schizophrenia and would be glad to send you my complete manuscript for your review thank you for your time and consideration and i look forward to hearing from you soon sincerely me posted by rick daley at 1 00 pm 4 comments labels suspense women s fiction query mad as a hatter revision 4 click here to read the original query click here to read the first revision click here to read the second revision click here to read the third revision dear awesome agent london 1882 seven years ago emil aleric and his sister were kidnapped emil survived his sister didn t so when he hears news of a serial killer rampaging london he s convinced that his former abductor is on the move again the peculiarities of the murders a note quoting alice in wonderland is found at each scene go hand in hand with the name his tormentor fashioned for himself the hatter when his guardian officer corwin james is put in charge of the case emil thinks it must be fate corwin s not to keen on emil having anything to do with the case but emil s extensive knowledge of the murderer s methods is too invaluable to waste yet as the two get closer and closer to tracking the man down emil realizes exactly what confronting his past will mean he can live with the nightmares but if he fails to avenge his sister s death he doesn t know how he ll live with himself if he lives at all complete at 51 000 words mad as a hatter is a ya historical novel written in alternating points of view thank you very much for your time and consideration sincerely tally posted by rick daley at 7 00 am no comments labels historical fiction young adult oct 10 2010 query all because of you dear agent name i am writing to you because i believe my 85 000 word contemporary suspenseful women s fiction novel all because of you would be appropriate for your agency kidnapped at the age of seven adelaide banvard has been forced to kill her entire life she s kept at the side of christian wren one of the most powerful men in los angeles but after ten years finally has a chance to escape her opportunity comes in the form of atf agent marcus grant a man whose assignment is to apprehend the leader behind one of the largest local gun running operations california has ever seen his loyalties are tested at every turn as he fights his way through wren s organization and his second in command but adelaide isn t everything she seems her schizophrenic mind superb combat skills and exquisite beauty fascinate marcus beyond control leading his investigation into hot water and into adelaide s own little world thank you for your time and consideration blah blah blah sincerely me posted by rick daley at 9 55 am 6 comments labels suspense women s fiction oct 8 2010 query second hand news revised click here to read the original query as promised i am back dear agent second hand news my 80 000 word humorous women s fiction is about new beginnings when gail goldblum s arranged marriage fails she moves into grandma bubbie s two room apartment in the washington heights neighborhood of manhattan one floor below her parents and loses herself in romance novels and the dream of happily ever after gail s family immediately begins the search for her next husband while she reunites with several old schoolmates has wild sex with two princeton boys joins a romance book club washes out of a pottery class and uses her wit and talent to find a new career as a teenager tony cimino worked part time for his father the youngest of eight children he still works for his father but refuses to give up the dream of having his own landscape business twenty years have passed when gail walks up to the counter for a slice of pizza and sees him tony the cute boy from her childhood has grown into a handsome kindhearted man chaos rules as bubbie escapes from assisted living moves into her granddaughter s small apartment and entertains the neighbors singing ethel merman tunes late at night in the elevator gail fends off a yuppie co op conversion and tony tries to capture gail s attention even as he realizes the dream of opening his own business the first time gail knew she loved tony she was in the fourth grade he was in the eighth each time they meet she tries to deny her feelings and walk away tony is a man who knows what he wants but gail not being able to trust again pushes the one person she wants out of her life i found your name on chuck sambuchino s blog a guide to literary agents read your blog daily and i believe my work meets your criteria i would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript thank you for your time and consideration respectfully opening lines no matter how a girl gets down the aisle being married and then divorced is preferable to dragging one s miserable carcass through life as an old maid three of us sit on a cold wooden bench in the judge s chamber and wait it s a long day and seven others have already finished and been escorted to the next room to sign papers and get a receipt pending the official documents when it is my turn i stand to answer three questions 1 do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth 2 do you gail goldblum silverstein wish to contest this action and 3 do you wish to return to your maiden name nothing comes out of my mouth and the girl next to me pulls the edge of my jacket and snaps say yes or i do and let s get the hell out of here i gulp i do three times and it is done i wait for a cheer from the audience but alas we are alone in the room with the judge and his bailiff who points this way miss i am officially an ex wife posted by rick daley at 7 43 am 4 comments labels humor women s fiction oct 6 2010 query the paw shake portal second revision click here to read the original query click here to read the first revision dear agent eleven year old alex s new pet is no ordinary cat he s shocked to find that the stray he s been caring for is able to transform into a girl his age her name is lumina and she approaches alex to ask for his assistance in fighting alley scratch an army of cats that hate people she is a member of the royal cat family dedicated to loving and respecting humans naturally she and her siblings are the army s prime targets the only way for lumina to gain the strength and endurance to battle alley scratch is to form a bond of trust with alex the more their friendship grows the healthier and stronger she will become alex is eager to form this bond to help her but he also comes up with an idea of his own why not show the alley scratch cats kindness to help turn them around to the good side unfortunately the cats aren t swayed by friendly chatter and an all you can eat picnic this only ends up causing a chaotic brawl and putting lumina and her family in even greater danger alex must find a way to protect his feline friends without causing another disaster and he s willing to do whatever it takes to save them the discovery of lumina is a middle grade novel complete at 30 000 words thank you for your time and consideration sincerely note when i took out the unneeded first paragraph in the last draft it left me with a boring hook hence the rewritten beginning as always please be honest and let me know if any of this doesn t work you guys are awesome thanks for your help posted by rick daley at 4 41 pm 3 comments labels middle grade oct 5 2010 query second hand news dear agent gail goldblum is a new york city woman on the edge she comes out of a lousy marriage into her grandma bubbie s two room apartment in washington heights her family arrange blind dates and trick her into meeting men and gail rebelling reunites with old schoolmates dates two wild boys from princeton and uses her wit and talent to find a new career and survive her family s attempts to marry her off again tony cimino the youngest of six children is left behind to run the neighborhood pizza business though he will not abandon the dream of being his own boss he doesn t remember gail yet there is something about her he needs to know more about the first time she knew she loved him she was in the fourth grade and he was in junior high school twenty years pass but when she walks up to the counter time freezes second hand news an 80 000 word humorous romance is about starting over how after twenty years two people find each other and fall in love i found your name the first time on chuck sambuchino s blog a guide to literary agents read your blog every day and i believe my work meets your criteria i would be happy to send part or all of the completed manuscript thank you for your consideration and time thanks one and all look forward to your feedback posted by rick daley at 7 33 am 7 comments labels humor romance oct 4 2010 query lakeside dear agent while swimming in a secluded lake seventeen year old hannah sees a discarded pendant on the lakebed when she picks it up the pendant transports her to the isolated town of lakeview where she meets lily the two become friends and hannah agrees to keep the lake the town and their friendship a secret for her own safety as well as lily s once school starts hannah begins dating brendan the new kid in town after his mom dies unexpectedly brendan overhears his dad speaking with a stranger about her death taking place at a lake brendan realizes that his dad lied to him about his mom s death hannah tells brendan about lily and the lake knowing that lily may be able to shed light on his mom s death what they discover in lakeview gives brendan hope for seeing his mom again but when his plan fails and hannah s life becomes in danger brendan must use the powers of the lake to set things right or risk losing his girlfriend forever lakeside a young adult novel complete at 85 000 words combines mystery romance supernatural elements and adventure thank you for your consideration sincerely author posted by rick daley at 1 00 pm 10 comments labels young adult query the paw shake portal first revision click here to read the original query author s note thank you so much to all who critiqued my first query it helped so much a special thank you to rick for hosting this i would be lost without the slushpile i realized my last query didn t accurately represent the story i was too tied up in details i feel like this one is more spot on but needs a ton of tightening i also tentatively changed the title thanks in advance for your suggestions dear agent eleven year old alex s closest friend is his cat no he isn t a loner his friend lumina is both human and feline when alex finds a stray cat in his back yard he doesn t expect her to be able to turn into a girl his age lumina approaches alex as a human and asks for his assistance in fighting alley scratch an army of cats that hate people the only way for her to gain the strength and endurance to battle alley scratch is to form a bond of trust with alex the more their friendship grows the healthier and stronger she will become alex is eager to form this bond to help lumina but he also comes up with an idea of his own why not show the alley scratch cats kindness to help turn them around to the good side unfortunately his plan backfires causing a chaotic brawl and putting lumina and her family in even greater danger alex must find a way to protect his feline friends without causing another disaster and he s willing to do whatever it takes to save them the discovery of lumina is a middle grade novel complete at 30 000 words thank you for your time and consideration sincerely posted by rick daley at 6 34 am 5 comments labels middle grade sep 30 2010 query mad as a hatter revision 3 click here to read the original query click here to read the first revision click here to read the second revision dear awesome agent london 1882 seven years ago emil aleric and his sister were kidnapped emil survived his sister didn t so when word of a ruthless killer rampaging london convinces emil that his kidnapper is on the move he thinks it...